Amica Nobis Amans

Friend vs Lover

Taehyung lent Jungkook some of his clothes again while his was in the washer, and he left him to shower the bad feelings away while he cooked something for himself with the things he brought up from the Professors lounge.

And while Jungkook showered and Taehyung cooked, Leo got a message.

- Psss, Finn. - Leo grabbed Finn's attention from the teacher. They were in "Criminal Law" class. Finn looked to the side at him yet his fingers were still typing, something that still creeped Leo out. And Leo just showed him his phone for Finn to read.

Mr. Jeon/ Jungkook's father: He's in Professor Taehyung's apartment. They told me he had to stay the night due to him getting sick. I saw he looked better this morning, however, Professor Taehyung still has matters to discuss with him. You can go get him when you're free. Good day.

Finn's fingers froze over his keyboard and he looked up at Leo.

- What...? - He looked concerned.

- I know. - Leo nodded, pocketing his phone and then looking at the teacher, unsure of what to do. - Should I go or should I stay? - He asked Finn's advice, but Finn was still disconcerted about the notice.

- Why did he get sick? And so suddenly... Didn't he look well yesterday? happy even? Sick with what? And what matters to discuss? With a teacher? -

- Slow down. You sound like Emily. - Leo was thinking just the same but saying it all out loud didn't help him much. He was looking forward, hands folded over the desk, with a frown on his face. - He was happy yesterday morning and arrived at lunch all merry as well. - He thought and thought.

- Could the girl have something to do with it? - Finn theorized; sitting down as still as possible and talking low to not draw attention to themselves.

- You think the girl would've gotten him sick? - He looked at Finn incredulously. - I know we're studying to get into the criminal field, but that doesn't mean everything has to be a conspiracy. -

- Ok, first of all, it's not a conspiracy, it's a theory, and second... - Leo chuckled silently and Finn averted his eyes with a slight grin. - And secondly, just think about it, he said he was going to meet her that afternoon and that she didn't really seem that ok in the morning. -

- Oh please. So what, she didn't like him so she wanted to get rid of him altogether? That's a bit too much, Finn. Get back to the ground. -

- Fine then, tell me your theory. - He challenged, looking back at him.

- Very well, let's see. - Leo looked ahead again, this time looking through memories and coming up with new thoughts. - Jungkook gets sick very easily. - He murmured with a grimace.

- And you tell me that just now? - Finn said exasperatedly.

- Well, it's just that he gets sick for a moment but then he's fine, like... it's sort of like... asthma? He has these things where if there are too many people around he feels kind of claustrophobic and can't seem to breathe right. -

- So does he have asthma or claustrophobia? -

- We have no idea. Neither does he as far as he's told us. He just said he feels like he can't breathe and that he needs clear air so whenever this happens we would either run to the nearest "outside" there is or Emily would calm him down. But usually, when this happens, he would get dizzy and then sick, but after that, he's fine, we would eat something and he would be fine again. Here, however, - He looked down at his pocket - it does suggest something much worse if he couldn't even get to his room. -

- Could he perhaps have been prevented from getting there? -

- Finn, I swear to God, tone your theories down a little, could you? -

- We must see every possible alternative. Why did he spend the night in a teacher's apartment if he just got sick as usual? - He whispered low only for Leo to hear.

- Finn, - Leo looked sideways at him, his focused expression wavering with fear. - You're seriously scaring me right now. This is Jungkook we're talking about, I can't let anything bad happen to him, he's my brother. - Finn's eyes got apologetic.

- But it really looks like something bad happened to him. - Leo looked off into space, into a million memories he had never seen twice before. Either trying to find something or just scaring himself even more for no reason. - Why do you have his father's number? - Finn asked curiously.

- Ummm... He gave it to me years ago. - He murmured, concentrating on something else in his mind.

- Why? -

- Just... in case... - He trailed away, remembering the day Mr. Jeon gave him his number. - He said it was just in case something bad happened to Jungkook. Or us when we were with him. He said it was just in case. And look, today it served us right, he found out where he was. -

- ...Interesting. - Finn muttered under his breath. There was something in the way he said it that made Leo turn to look at him.

- What are you theorizing now, huh? -

- Me? Nothing. - He looked completely honest at that. And Leo was left slightly confused. - I was just thinking, - Finn went on. - Can I ask you some questions? - At that, Leo grinned, leaving the confusion behind.

- Are you sure you want to be a lawyer and not a detective? - Finn chuckled. - Go ahead then, interrogate me. -

- Do you know who Professor Taehyung is? -

- Jungkook's teacher and nanny. - Finn did a double-take and Leo realized he forgot Finn wasn't in on the joke. - His father told Professor Taehyung to keep an eye on him and he seemed to have taken it up by heart. -

- Oh. - Finn thought. - So you could say this Professor is a friend of his father? -

- I don't know. - He shrugged. - Maybe, if he trusts him with his son. -

Finn took some seconds after that speculation and then asked again, a little unsure.

- How would you describe Jungkook's relationship with his father? -

- What's that got to do with anything? - Leo frowned.

- Don't you see the connection there? His father told this professor to keep an eye on him, and he gave you his number "just in case", and if you haven't noticed, you used it to tell him Jungkook went missing, so that too is keeping an eye on Jungkook. - He then started thinking out loud. - Crowded places make him sick... Does Jungkook usually do things he shouldn't? -

- What the...? Why are you asking me this? -

- Why are you so determined to keep calm? What if this is something where you shouldn't be calm about? What if he's in trouble and you know nothing about it because you keep on denying the possibility that your dear younger brother could be doing things he shouldn't? -

Leo's brain stopped working right there. Immediately he started pocketing everything back into his bag, he didn't care if it was nine in the morning and there was one hour left for the class to end, he had to see it for himself. Just as fast, Finn pocketed his things as well. Without any regard for anyone watching them or to see if the teacher even cared about them, they left the classroom silently but hurriedly, closing the door behind them.

- Where to? - Finn asked.

- You didn't have to come with me. - Leo knelt and took out the Map Book from his bag.

- I would never be able to pay attention to the class if I'm worried about you. -

Leo's finger tracing a path on the paper stopped in its tracks and he looked up with a confused frown at Finn who looked to be a little out of breath but kept his green eyes fiercely locked with Leo's.

- Why in hell would you be worrying over me? - He didn't plan for it to sound unkind but... it did.

Finn's breath visibly hitched, but his eyes never wavered.

- Where to? - He asked again, determined, and Leo couldn't think of anything else than to look back down at the map.

- The Professors' Living Area is on the other side of the library, mirroring the Students'. - He pocketed the Book again and got up.

- But we can't get inside without a teacher. - Finn's words stopped Leo's first step. It was true.

- Bloody hell. - Leo sighed at the ceiling and looked back down at Finn. He was half a head shorter than him, just like Jungkook. - We have to get in there. - Despite all his wishes, he was worried now.

- Maybe we could... - Finn thought and got one step closer to him. - We could either find a teacher that could help us; go to the reception desk and just ask if we could get in; ...go to the Professors' living area and knock until someone opens the door; or go to Jungkook's father and ask him if we could get in with his permission. - He finished numbering with his fingers and Leo thought.

- I like the one where we just wait until one of them opens the door. -

- Couldn't we... try to call him or something? - Finn asked, unsure, with his hands fumbling a little in front of his chest.

- Don't you think we have done that shit a trillion times? - Leo said exasperated, but not at Finn, just in general. He groaned, placing a hand over his eyes. - Emily almost had a meltdown last night when he wouldn't arrive, we stayed there till midnight, and still nothing. -

- You were in his room? -

- Yes, with Jimin and that motherfucker. - He opened his eyes, letting his hand go to his hip. Finn was confused. - Jimin is his roommate. And even he looked like he might've cried about it. Don't know if he did or not. - He added in an undertone. - But enough about this, we're wasting time. - He hurried Finn and they started walking fast towards the library.

- Just for the off chance that he might have his phone with him now, call him. - Finn pressed again and Leo looked murderously at him. However, Finn didn't even flinch. - Do it, Leo. Just in case. - He said determinedly and Leo sighed, rolling his eyes as he took his phone out of his pocket.

- I don't even know why you care about him so much, he's not even your friend. - He mumbled as he unlocked his phone, but nearly dropped it when Finn punched him hard against his side. - What was that for? - He said, indignant as they kept walking.

- "What was that for"? Don't you have any idea how hurtful your words were? - Finn was even more indignant than him.

- Well, I'm sorry to burst your delicate bubble but the truth isn't always nice to hear. - He was bitter about all the things Finn had said that made him begin to doubt Jungkook, and now they were arguing like they never had before.

- Delicate? May I remind you that hurt is a cousin of worry Mr. "I'm leaving my favorite class because Jungkook might be in trouble"? -

- Oh shut the fuck up, you were the one that got worried about him first. -

- Of course, I would get worried about him! He's a person that might be in trouble, why wouldn't I be worried about him when I'm literally studying to become a lawyer to help people? I don't care if I'm not his friend, I don't have to be his friend to help him and not only his friends are allowed to be worried for him, but you mister, the way you talk is way worse than crude, it's meant to hurt, and I don't get why you're getting all protective over him by reminding me you two are like brothers because that will only make me want to help him more, because I want to help you, because I care about your stupid feelings, and I don't have to be anyone's friend to care about their feelings, are we fucking clear? - Once Finn was done, he noticed a too-long silence from his side, and when he turned to see, Leo's expression was one of confusion, worry, and bewilderment all at once.

- Is too fucking early for this shit. - He shook his head, trying to clear it. - Stop. - He stopped them then. They were in a lone corridor, not a main one, this one was too narrow and didn't have a chandelier. Finn looked up at him, they were both a little out of breath, and his eyes were defiant. - Stop looking at me like that. -

- Like what? -

- Like you're waiting for me to have a counterargument. I don't, so stop. That conversation will stay there floating in the air until it vanishes and we're going to laugh it off later, understood? - He tried to sound slightly menacing as he murmured low and close to Finn, but still far enough.

Finn shook his head.

- You're unbelievable. So what, someone talks about feelings and you run off like a coward? -

Immediately, Leo pushed him on the chest and his back hit the wall.

- Never, - Leo took a very close step towards Finn, completely enclosing him with his bigger and stronger frame, his eyes aflame with fury. - Never call me a coward. - But Finn only stood there, defiant in every cell of his body.

- Then don't act like one. - Leo froze. - Don't deny the truth for your peace of mind, don't ignore the signs when something looks wrong, and don't run away when people open up to you. That thing of letting the conversation just vanish in the air is futile for everyone involved and you know it, it never vanishes, it just creates tension, and I, - He got even closer to him, too close for what was socially allowed, jaw clenched and eyes just as furious. - I refuse to have any tension with you, Leo. Or to walk away. - He pushed Leo's frozen shoulder and passed by him. - Let's go. - And then he started walking again, with a more than shocked and confused Leo behind him. - You were trying to call him, were you not? - Finn reminded him and Leo was pissed that Finn was right again.

- I'll tell Emily where he was first. -

In Taehyung's apartment, Jungkook got out of the bathroom, warm and comfortable, hair wet and wearing Taehyung's clothes; big white hoodie, jeans that he had to keep lifting because they didn't fit him too well, boxers and socks. He loved how it all smelled like Taehyung and he walked tiredly but comfortably towards him who was cutting some fruit on a plate over the kitchen counter, it appears he had already eaten breakfast.

Taehyung saw him coming and he smiled warmly while Jungkook went to hug him from behind, hands going around his middle and placing his cheek on his shoulder blade.

- How are you feeling? - Taehyung asked softly.

- Way better, but out of energy. I need food. -

- Here are your crackers, Love. - Jungkook let go of him and went around to look, there were different kinds of crackers on the kitchen counter. He looked up at Taehyung with a grin and one eyebrow raised. - I didn't know which one you'd like so I brought all of them. - And that gained him an adoring kiss on the cheek from Jungkook, which he took more than happily.

Jungkook pushed the crackers to one side -next to his bag- and in one swift little jump, he sat on the kitchen counter, helped by his hand. He crossed his ankles, socked feet dangling, and started to see which flavors were on each bag of crackers.

- Are you perhaps a dancer? - Taehyung's sudden question brought him up short and he looked up from the two little bags he was reading. Taehyung had a little grin on his face, and he chuckled, confused.

- No, never. Why? - He left one bag down and grabbed another one.

- It's just that... sometimes you would move very graciously, like a dancer. - Taehyung thought while he cut his apple. - And also your body is... - He trailed away with half a grin, and Jungkook could feel a very noticeable blush tinting his whole face as he grinned down at the crackers in his hands. - You're lean and strong but somehow still soft. Fluid, maybe. It's like a dancer's. Like a ballet dancer's. -

- Oh, no, a ballet dancer's body is way stronger than mine. Most of all in the legs. If they do this, - He stretched his leg in front of him. - the thigh muscle looks like a rock, and I still don't know how to get it without having to jump as they do. Also the calves, and the side muscles. And the arms, oh, the arms. - He let his leg down again and grabbed another bag to read. Uuu, cinnamon.

- Wait, back up a second. - Taehyung said as he chewed and finished cutting, then he swallowed as Jungkook looked up at him. - So you don't dance... but you train to have that body? - He asked, confused.

- Well, yeah. - Jungkook chose the natural flavor ones just in case he couldn't eat anything more favored than that and opened it. - I really like how they look so I want to look like them. - He shrugged and tore a small piece of cracker to chew. Taehyung got closer, his hip touching Jungkook's knee, making warmth flow through him at the contact. He was longing for contact, but he stayed still in his seat.

- Then why don't you dance? -

Jungkook smiled sadly up at him.

- That dream died as soon as it came. - He shook his head, and Taehyung looked expectantly up at him, so he sighed. - When I was fifteen, my family and I went to a ballet performance. It wasn't even because they wanted to go, it had just been an invitation so they were obliged, and so was I. I was reluctant at first, but then I saw the main male dancer come up on the stage. - He stopped for a second, remembering as he looked at Taehyung and his own eyes got even sadder, so he averted his eyes from him. - He was the first man I ever painted because he looked beautiful. - He was tense in his seat, but then Taehyung placed his hand over his knee and the warmth gave him strength. - I got mesmerized, not only by his body but the way he moved like it was nothing like he was of silk floating in the air. And I wanted that, I wanted to look like that because it was the most beautiful body I had ever seen, and I wanted to look just as beautiful. -

- You are. - Taehyung cut across him with an honest smile and a squeeze on the knee. - You really are. - He seemed to be mesmerized, remembering what was beneath the clothing with a lovely chuckle, his eyes twinkling even in the gray light of the cold day. Jungkook giggled and lowered his gaze, loving Taehyung's confirmation and feeling slightly shy.

- Thanks. - He said tinily, and Taehyung nodded for him to continue. - The story gets sad, do you really want to hear it? You look so happy. - Jungkook pouted, sad at the thought of getting Taehyung sad.

- My Angel, if I do get sad, just a kiss and a hug will make me feel better. - He reassured him, and Jungkook smiled and nodded. But just before continuing he took another bite of his cookie.

- I went back home and took out a canvass. I didn't even do a sketch, I just painted, all from memory, and I painted and painted and it was all him. I looked at my art and loved it, I felt excited when I thought about asking my parents if I could go to dance classes... and I thought... and thought... and once I remembered how they looked when they saw the male dancers come up on stage, I finally realized that I couldn't go ask my parents something like that. And then I also realized the gravity of what I have done, of what I have painted. It was a long, awful, night. -

He finished low and took a small bite again, but then when he looked up and saw how Taehyung had indeed got sadden, he finished his cookie in one bite and brought Taehyung closer by the shoulders to place him in between his knees and hug him gently, resting his cheek in his shoulder, the tip of his nose brushing against his neck, feeling the warmth of the skin, smelling his scent, feeling his body. He wrapped his arms around his neck as he swallowed the cookie and also wrapped his ankles around him behind his things: Taehyung hugged him just as tight but still ever so gently, turning his head to brush his lips against the soft skin of his cheek as one of his hands moved up and down his back soothingly.

Jungkook sighed, completely content and comfortable like nothing could hurt him, like he was whole as if he himself had been brought up on a flower farm with a lovable family and a beautiful childhood. In Taehyung's arms, he loved himself entirely. Because through ups and downs, sickness and health, sadness and happiness, stories and dreams, Taehyung was still here and held him like he was the missing part. He felt loved.

Jungkook leaned back softly and held Taehyung's face. They locked eyes and stayed there for a moment. No sadness or worry could be found, just connection, Taehyung was feeling what Jungkook was at that same moment, nothing but love and adoration for his other half. A hand holding Jungkook's waist went up to hold his cheek, the thumb caressed the skin, the bruise, the cut, the soft bottom lip, and little by little they got closer. The warmth in Jungkook's body was so nice that he could smile, but he was so immersed in Taehyung that he couldn't concentrate on anything that wasn't his body, his closeness, his skin, his eyes, his lips. The tips of their noses brushed and they tilted their heads, eyes looking down at soft lips, breaths cut in their throats at the anticipation, at the warmth, at the liquid, honey-flavored, sweet moment of only the two of them wrapped tight in their bond and nothing else.

At the same time Jungkook closed his eyes, Taehyung shortened the distance and kissed him. Their lips met ever so gently and then separated, then kissed again just as softly. This kiss was meant to be felt, to feel the soft skin of the other's lips in their entirety instead of just thinking of devouring them, they just felt gently. They felt the warmth of the other's mouth, the breath, the noses brushing on cheeks, and with eyes closed every touch was numbing, intoxicating, but not in a frenzied kind of way, not building up to something more, just feeling it and enjoying it with every fiber of their being, enjoying the closeness of each other. Lover loving and being loved.

This kiss was so pleasant, like an antidote to any and every kind of pain. Only that mattered: the kiss. Nothing else was moving but their lips and occasionally their heads. As well as their hearts, of course. But they weren't speeding away, that's why it was so comforting, their hearts were in tune with the other's. They were so connected, one heart, one mind, one kiss.

When a buzzing interrupted their moment.

Jungkook was the first to lean back and disconnect. It shocked him momentarily when a wave of cold air brushed his cheeks and woke him up from that dreamy moment, but then the buzzing went on and on and Taehyung looked down beside Jungkook. The other followed the gaze and found out it was his backpack. He reached with one hand, unzipped it, searched inside, and took out his phone. He was planning on seeing who it was and then turning it down for later, but when he saw the name, he immediately answered the call.

- Hello? -

Taehyung was so close that he could hear the other end of the call without the other needing to yell. So the yelling startled them both.

- Fucking finally! - Leo's angry voice was like a slap in the face. Blissfulness was left behind after the bucket of ice water that was that angry tone froze him. - Finn, he answered. - Jungkook grimaced at Taehyung's shoulder. - So blessed I am that you finally decided to answer the fucking phone, Jungkook. - He sounded so mad that Jungkook couldn't even try to cut him off. - What do you have a phone for if you're just going to ignore every single message and call, eh? It's like you don't even care if other people get worried over you! - Jungkook's eyes closed with a frown at the force of the anger.

- Stop it. - Another voice from the other side tried to stop Leo, perhaps Finn.

- What? Are you kidding me? I have all the right to be fucking angry right now! -

- Stop it, please. - Jungkook begged in almost a whisper. It felt worse than terrible when Leo was angry at him, it was worse than his father's anger, because Leo was his brother, his mate, his best friend, a person whose words he holds so dearly, so when he says things like this, Jungkook can't take it. Taehyung's hand held his face more securely and he looked up at him. He was mad at Leo for hurting him. Jungkook shook his head and waited for Leo to say something, he had gone quiet, like he wasn't even on the other side of the phone anymore. After some time, he came back.

- Ok. - He sounded calmer. Tamed. - What happened? - He demanded, enunciating the two words with finality, and Jungkook imagined him with his hands on his hips waiting for the answer.

- I thought he would've told you. - He knew they'd understand "he" as in his father.

- He said you got sick and had to stay the night but nothing more than that, and I need details, Jungkook. -

Well, that was new. He usually didn't ask for details. Jungkook frowned again at Taehyung's shoulder.

- Why do you need details? What happened was exactly that, I got sick and had to stay here because I couldn't get to my room and I didn't want to go to the hospital wing, that's it. -

- No, no, I need details. Why did you get sick? What happened before you got sick? What happened while you got sick? How and why did you end up in that man's apartment? Why did your father say that teacher had matters to discuss with you? What matters have you been discussing? Does the girl you're seeing have anything to do with the situation? Are you in any kind of trouble, Jungkook? What the fuck have you been doing when I'm not around!? -

Every new question was like a new slap in the face, his frown getting deeper and deeper until he felt an obstruction forming in his throat. What was going on? Why was he acting as he had never before? This wasn't only worry, this was anger, this was desperation, like he thought Jungkook was doing drugs or something of the sort and he desperately needed the confirmation that he wasn't but he was already angry at even the idea of it.

Jungkook couldn't think of each question to answer, he could only think of the situation as a whole, the fact that Leo was asking for more information was his main concern because that had never happened before and he himself was currently doing something illegal so he was completely scared that something might have slipped in any kind of way.

He was hurt and scared.

- What happened? Why are you asking me all this? - His voice sounded hurt, and that displeased Taehyung even more, his hold tightening protectively. - I don't know what you're trying to achieve here. Do you perhaps think that I'm lying to you like I was to my father and I was never sick? That I went... I don't know... partying with that girl and got in some sort of trouble and I'm being lectured about it? I . was . sick, I was so sick that I didn't have any strength left to even move and if a teacher hadn't helped me, my health would've gotten even worse on the cold night. Are you happy with that information? Or do you perhaps want all the gory details so you could be sure I'm not doing drugs or getting in a gang? -

Sarcasm, the best way to express feelings of anger and being petty at the same time. He didn't look up from the same spot, his displeasure mounting, but then... blessedly... Taehyung kissed him silently on the forehead and caressed his cheek, successfully making him feel a little better. The reminder that he wasn't alone, gave him strength when he had none. And he waited for Leo's answer, he had gone really quiet. But then when he spoke again, Jungkook couldn't believe it.

- Yeah... If you've gotten in a gang you would've invited me, right? - He was trying to joke now. Jungkook could tell he realized he had messed up and now was trying to just joke about it, but he couldn't, not with this.

- Leo, I can't believe you really would think of me that way. - Drugs? Partying? A gang? Did Leo really think he was in trouble because someone found out about that? That he got intoxicated and that's why he got sick and was now being lectured about it? That was a really low blow coming from his brother.

- I... got... confused into believing something really bad was going on... Oh, don't you dare look at me that way, Finn. You were the one asking me if Jungkook usually does things he shouldn't and then... and then theorizing on and on really awful things. -

- ¡I was just trying to see every alternative possibility like a theory should be! You were the one that took it out of proportion! -

- Shut up, shut up right this instant. -

- You're terrible at listening! -

- You're terrible at keeping quiet! -

- You're being an altogether terrible friend right now, to everyone. - Jungkook heard the meaningful silence from the other side as he shook his head. - And what hurts the most is that I never thought I would ever say that about you. -

- Jungkook--

- No more phone for you, Mr. Jeon. - Taehyung's voice was clear and strict so Leo would hear, and Jungkook felt grateful he intervened.

- I have to go now, Leo. - Jungkook said low over the phone as his other hand stroked the back of Taehyng's head.

- Wait, Jungkook--

Jungkook hung up and left the phone beside him over his bag, then his hand went up behind Taehyung's head while he looked sideways with a slight grimace. How could this be?

- Kooky? -

He shook his head and rubbed the heels of his hands against his eyes.

- What is going on? I can't keep up with any of this. Tom... Finn... Him, the other one, then her and that one too, you, me, this, that, that other thing as well. What...? I can't... -

- Shhh... - Taehyung shushed him softly and held his wrists, Jungkook let him lower them, and then he held his face to kiss his cheeks. - Shhh... - All the while softly and gently kissing his face, caressing his cheeks until he closed his eyes at the soothing gesture. Taehyung rested Jungkook's forehead over his shoulder, close to his neck, and brushed the back of his head with one hand while the other pushed him closer and then rubbed up and down. - Just think of the air getting to your lungs. Just think of my hand on your hair and your back. Just... breathe. -

His voice was low and oh so soothing. Like the first time Jungkook had been softly spoken to by him, it calmed him completely, and he did as he was told. Just the air, just his touch, just his breathing. Jungkook placed a hand over Taehyung's chest and breathed just like he was, slowly and deeply. Taehyung started rocking them ever so slightly from side to side, and Jungkook, drained as he was from the night before, could fall asleep right here right now in the safe and comfortable hold of his lover.

He leaned back just enough and looked up into Taehyung's beautiful dark eyes, the first-ever dark eyes he had ever found beautiful, and gave him a thankful little smile.

- What would've become of me without you? - Taehyung connected their foreheads and held him close by his waist while Jungkook folded his hands around his neck.

- The same as me without you. -

- I don't think so somehow. -

- How come? - They were talking so softly, only for the other, only them in their soothing bubble.

- I was desperate for contact, so much that I was violent. But for what you've told me I take that you weren't that way at all. -

- I... coped. - The sudden strain in Taehyung's voice made him look up, disconnecting their foreheads. - No, I won't tell you about it until you feel better. - Taehyung said fast but still low, and Jungkook frowned worriedly.

- Is it bad? -

- It could not be, but I don't know how it would affect you or if it would affect you at all, and I don't want to take any chances when you're trying to mend. I'll tell you every bad thing about my life when you feel better, alright? - He asked softly, truly wanting Jungkook to understand and to accept but not forcing him to drop the subject. Jungkook understood that, if the situation were reversed, he would've done the same thing, so he nodded and gave him a little smile.

- Later then. - Taehyung smiled as well and his eyes turned endearing as he watched Jungkook watching him. Then it looked like he couldn't help it and kissed Jungkook on the lips, for then to look back at his eyes with just a glint of dreaminess in them. - Is your head in the clouds again? - Jungkook asked softly with a little giggle, and Taehyung sighed.

- Maybe. - He chuckled sheepishly and looked down, only for Jungkook to hold his cheek and make him look up again.

- What are you dreaming about this time? - He asked curiously, loving this conversation much more than anything else that might be unpleasant. Taehyung didn't really answer with words, he just looked around them at the kitchen, then at the apartment, and finally at Jungkook, accentuating the last with a tight hold. And Jungkook understood. - Ah. Home sweet home? - The both of them having this same conversation but free, far in a safe home of their own.

Taehyung smiled dreamily and nodded.

- I just... - The smile turned sad, and then it vanished for a slight anguish expression to take over until he connected their foreheads again. - I want to take you away, from anything that might hurt you. - He promised, and Jungkook sighed, brushing the back of his head.

- ...I want you to. - He saw rather than heard Taehyung's breathing stopping in the base of his throat. - It's just that, it feels so good to be truly happy that every time I get sad or upset now it hurts even more. I've grown so much with you that going back out there and putting on a mask feels more and more difficult, more and more of a burden trying to keep up with my own lies. If it could be that easy, that we could just disappear without hurting anybody, I would take it. But it's not that easy, we both have people we don't want to leave behind and a story to keep up if we don't want anybody on our tails. - He sighed and his shoulders felt heavy. - The past a burden, the present a pain, the future a blind faith for it to be better. Every single day. - He finished in a melancholic tone.

- It doesn't have to be that way. - Taehyung straightened them and looked at Jungkook's eyes with just that, faith. - The past a burden we can leave behind, the present a pain we grow thanks to, the future alight with bright faith, because it can always be better. Every single day. - And he gave him an encouraging smile. His eyes were so bright, just like his words, just like his heart, his faith, his smile, him. He took his own depressing words and turned them over making them a powerful message of hope.

Jungkook held his face in both hands.

- I love you. - He could be saying this for the hundredth time and it would still make his heart feel like it will explode. He loved him, he truly did, and it felt so good to love him, he felt powerful because he loved him, strong and beautiful, and he felt hopeful because he loved him. It was him, it was all him.

- I love you. - It still disarmed him the way Taehyung could express so much with his voice, with his eyes, like no one else ever could, or would. Like no one else ever will make Jungkook feel, he made him feel. - My Angel. - Taehyung sighed and then kissed him.

Knock Knock Knock.

- Jungkook, open up. -

- Oh, bloody hell. - Jungkook cursed under his breath. They looked at each other, Jungkook grimacing, Taehyung frowning, and Leo knocked again. - How's he even here? - He whispered to Taehyung but the other only shrugged.

- Only a teacher could've helped him in. -

- I wouldn't run past him the possibility that he just broke the glass doors and got in. - An unstoppable little chuckle got out from his clenched teeth and stopped Taehyung when he was about to move back. - Let me. -

- I don't really want him talking to you right now. Not if he's angry. - He looked displeased by the idea.

- If he doesn't talk to me, he'll break down the door. - Right on cue, Leo knocked again a little more strongly than before. Taehyung moved back reluctantly and went to put his plate with cut apple pieces on the fridge while Jungkook jumped off and went to the door. Another knock. - Calm down, Leo. - He sighed as he grabbed the doorknob and turned it tiredly. - What--

He stopped. There was Leo, yes, with Finn by his side, but behind them, taller than both of them, there was the teacher that helped them get in. Alexander Evans. Next to Leo, he looked like he could be his father, with black hair, blue eyes, and a strong build, but the big difference was... that this man... his presence right in front of him... his eyes looking straight at him...

Jungkook felt a cold still him on the spot. Everything moved in the slowest of motions for his vision but in his body, everything moved faster than lightning at the sight of that man. He felt chills rise goosebumps and a disgusting feeling flowing through his body, and the only thing he could think was to run.

All of this happened the second Jungkook realized he was there, and then the next, when Leo tried to talk, he was slamming the door shut and running away. His heart running faster than he could, the fear overpowering him, he couldn't even stop when Taehyung called him, his body was even more desperate than he was to get away and to hide. He got inside the bathroom and closed the door, he got inside the closet and closed the door, and he sat down in the tightest ball he could manage, shivering in the corner of the dark little room.

But when he breathed in forcefully, he smelled something. He opened his eyes and he couldn't see so he sniffed again, and that scent was there once more. It was somewhere in front of him. He started fumbling with his hands in the darkness a little at a time until he felt something, and he pulled it tentatively close to him and felt it once more. If his sense of touch was as right as he thought it was, he knew what he had in his hands; it was the suit jacket Taehyung wore the day before, and it was completely engulfed in Taehyung's familiar, manly, woodsy, amazing, and soothing scent.

Taehyung thought it was all ok when he was putting the fruit he cut in the fridge. Until he heard the sudden bang of the door closing and Jungkook, terrified like a cat affronted with a venomous snake, walking back from it.

- Jungkook! -

Taehyung called him, but he didn't stop, he just ran off like he had that first night, into the bathroom, closing the door shut. Then Taehyung heard another door closing and knew he had locked himself in the closet.

Completely confused and also feeling scared for what it had been that scared Jungkook, Taehyung put on the sweater and slippers and went to the door taking a deep breath to brace himself for then to open it.

- Oh, you must be kidding me. - He said under his breath as his eyes locked with Evans'.

- What the hell is going on? - Leo asked exasperatedly to no one in particular.

- Leo, shhh. - Good thing this other boy had some sense in him.

- Mr. Kim, my students told me Jungkook spent the night in your apartment due to him getting sick. - Taehyung was seething because he couldn't just punch this guy in the face. - In my professional opinion I object to this wholeheartedly. It will not help either you or the growth of your student as a strong member of this society. I'll say again what I said last night, if you treat your students like toddlers they will never grow up. - Taehyung was just one step away from getting fired. - May I know why if Jungkook is indeed sick, he's not in the hospital wing? - Forget fired, he would go to court for what he wanted to do to this man.

To everyone's surprise, Leo spoke.

- He doesn't like hospitals, he would do everything to avoid going to one. - His voice was controlled but still angry under the surface. He did more bad than good.

- Mr. Kim, you are completely corrupting the opportunity of teaching this young man that life isn't, however, he wants it to be. What will happen if he needs to go to a hospital for a life or death situation? Will he just expect other people to accept his aversion to the place and just bring everything he needs to him? I can see the medicine on the coffee table, you aren't doing him any good. -

- Medicine? - Leo asked, worried this time, and tried to look over Taehyung's shoulder. Something he could do easily since they were almost the same height. Taehyung looked at him with just the same amount of anger he was looking at Evans.

- Were you still thinking he was lying to you? -

Leo looked affronted when he started back at Taehyung.

- I wasn't, I was just worried for my brother. -

- Your brother? - Evans asked him softly, confused.

- We're best friends. - Leo amended. Taehyung could see Leo did look uncomfortable with Evans, he couldn't even look him in the eye when he spoke, he just turned his face to the side to talk over his shoulder at him.

- Mr. Evans, - Taehyung looked at him as best as he could without seeming murderous. - It was clear last night that our teaching methods were completely different and how our students are taught by us in a way that will continue to be without any interference from you. That was understood, so there's no point for you to come up here and still try to tell me how to do my job when the discussion has been closed. Furthermore, - He looked at the other two in between them. - what I don't understand is why you two would be in here. If it is to talk to Jungkook, you may do so when I dismiss him; If it is to apologize, - He looked at Leo this time. - you may do it later as well. And let me tell you something, - He was angry at him for sure, but this piece of truth was necessary not only for Leo but for Jungkook as well. - I can understand that you're worried, Leonardo, but demanding is not the way to do things. Theorizing is a good thing when you want to understand something from every possible angle, but you have to remember that it's just that, a theory, not a fact. Remember that he's your brother, not any bloke out there. -

Leo was left with a frown, it was of confusion, of not knowing what to do. But Taehyung was brought back by Evans clicking his tongue.

- The hypocrisy. - Taehyung sighed, trying to calm himself down, holding onto the door and the frame of it for dear life so he wouldn't do something stupid. - I say he should demand answers when it is on his right to know such things. This is his brother we're talking about so, of course, he would want to see him and make sure he's right, of course, he would want details of what happened to make sure nothing worse happened to him, and if he's not giving answers then--

- Then it would be because he's not ready to tell him. - Taehyung finished with a strong voice. - You seem to forget people have feelings, don't you? - For some unknown reason, Evans got rigid. - I really don't understand how you're friends with Mr. Jeon. He was the one that allowed him to stay here with me. -

- Of course, he did. - Evans scoffed. - He's too soft on his kids, he always has been. -

Taehyung saw red then, and his words came out from deep within him.

- Well, sometimes you have to be soft on your kids or else they'll break, won't they? -

The three in front of him got stone rigid, but then Evans seemed to be trying to contain something worse than anger, and the young ones in the middle of them looked down at the floor, tense and unmoving, frozen with fear. It was then that Taehyung realized he might've made a mistake there.

- Am, - Finn tried to speak louder than the terrifying cold aura that spread through the place. It was murderous, it was evil, and if someone else was seeing this from afar it would all be unnoticed. - Well... we have what we need, right Leo? We know that... that Jungkook's fine here and that... we'll see him later. -

- Yes. - Leo was trying to resist the fear, but he seemed to be failing at the seams, he couldn't look over his shoulder at the man, and he couldn't even lift his head properly. - Yes, I guess we can leave now. Professor Evans, thank you again for letting us through. -

- It was my pleasure. -

Taehyung's breath hitched and he saw how the boys got even more scared. The sound of his voice was even more frightening when he was angry, because it was oh so calm. Like the silence of the killer when he's right behind you.

- Right then. - Leo was really trying to be brave. - Professor Taehyung, sorry for barging in unannounced, we--

- Don't apologize for getting worried over your brother, Leonardo. - Evans spoke, still in that same tone of voice, cold and calm, lovely and deadly. Leo just stopped talking and nodded.

- Yes, sir. - He agreed.

Taehyung didn't have words for any of this, this was all so wrong. Finn moved then, the bravest of them all even if he was the smallest in comparison. Lean and narrow, he looked like he could run away if he tried to, so maybe that was why he was taking his chances and turning to the side to be facing not only Taehyung but Evans as well.

- Professors. - He inclined his head respectfully and then motioned for Leo to follow, and he did, turning around and trying to walk past Evans. But then Evans grabbed Leo by the wrist and stopped him. Finn froze, his finger still pushing the button down on the elevator, and Taehyung took one step forwards, but his hands never left their holds. And then Leo spoke.

- Yes, Sir? - His voice didn't show fear like his body was, all tense and frozen on the spot. When Evans answered.

- Teach your brother how to be strong like you, Leonardo. Because he got sick all due to me stopping him just like this. - And he moved his hand up to show Leo his hold on his wrist, and then, gently, he lowered his arm again and let go. The sound of the elevator doors opening was his cue to turn around and enter it, while Leo was left momentarily frozen.

- Leo. - Only then when Finn called him did he move, but still it was mechanical, and Taehyung was so upset to think Evans was getting to Jungkook's strongest friend and strongest defense when Taehyung wasn't around.

And he had to watch how these two boys entered the elevator with that man, still frozen with fear as the doors closed, and he could do nothing about it because he was indeed not their teacher and the discussion, as he said, had been closed the night before.

This was all so wrong.

He closed the door and stood there looking transfixed at the floor.

Jungkook said they were all rumors, that Alexander could have been the reason his son was dead, but rumor or not the fact remains that he had indeed beaten him, he had indeed mistreated his son that way and then he died.

This man was violent, cold, and heartless. How could a normal or at least healthy man incline to beat up his children? And he just went on with his life, traveling to who knows where and laughing with who knows who as his wife, the mother of the child whom his husband mistreated until death, still clung to his arm and kissed him on the cheek? What is this? Is this society so fucked up that people like that could be walking around like nothing happened and instead incarcerate those who, like himself, have done nothing wrong?

Not only was Alexander at fault in this situation, but it would also be his wife, any family that had to have known about the birth of the child, and the helpers of the house that child lived in because they said nothing to the police when they would've heard something, his friends also must've known something, anything, and those were not only Jungkook's father who gave him a job at one of the most prestigious universities in the world but also the Prince of Wessex. This man has a hand in politics and education, he could influence the whole future of this country and he's a violent man!

And he's free to walk without even a trial to his name with his wife in one arm while his powerful friends back him up and anyone who disagrees gets silenced by fear, just like any student of his might've been silenced and that's why he doesn't have a single complain even if everyone knows he used to beat his son.

The influence he has, scared Taehyung because he has no idea just how much it went. The uncertainty is scary, Jungkook was right about that. The way Mr. Jeon just flat out told him violence didn't work on Jungkook made him feel like his chest was being contracted by both anguish and anger. How many times had he tried? And in how many ways?

He couldn't ask Jungkook, of course, he couldn't. Jungkook's reaction at the library when he had called him a victim was proof that he was in a very, very terrible denial. Maybe he was in so much denial about things that happened to him that his mind just shuts them down. It pains Jungkook to remember so much that he couldn't even breathe. Just what had they done to him? What had they done to his beautiful Angel that he just took one look out the door and then bolted to hide away?

He couldn't ask him, not right now, but Taehyung was concerned. The way his father talks about him and to him confuses Taehyung, he can't understand that relationship.

Jungkook looked terrified when he was taking them to see the headmaster and then was tamed and compliant while his father was telling him how disappointed he was, but then in the bathroom, while Taehyung was cleaning his wound, he was angry. Taehyung thought he had it then, that Mr, Jeon was a terrible father and Jungkook hated him, as simple as that, but the next time Mr. Jeon was mentioned was when Taehyung made the mistake of saying how he wasn't sure if his father really loved him or not. Jungkook cried terribly and looked around the apartment like he was both scared and hurt.

Taehyung was left confused after that, but nothing like the conversation that just took place this morning in his living room. It was so bizarre. Jungkook was clearly uncomfortable and seemed as though he wanted to get away but still, he talked back with the apparent intention of getting his father angry, but also, the way his father was talking back was... They were talking back and forth like they were equals while they looked like victim and attacker, most of all how Jungkook ran away at the end. It was all so... wrong, so... confusing.

Everything was wrong. He was on the way to getting Alexander as an enemy as well as getting Jeon as a friend and it was all for the plot of their lies, all the while Jungkook was unstable because of all the overwhelming things that are happening too fast, he had to lie to his friends and keep it all so perfectly so they wouldn't suspect while having to keep up with this between him and Taehyung.

In less than a week, Jungkook's world had changed completely; from believing what he was told about not touching men to starting to think for himself and stepping up to walk his life how he truly wanted to; from being accustomed to violence he had learned how to love and be loved in more ways than the verbal or emotional; from not liking his own touch he blossomed into this beautiful and marvelous Sensual God; all in less than a week. He had grown much more in this week alone than in twenty-one years. He understands wholeheartedly why Jungkook is overwhelmed.

Taehyung shook his head and straightened up, looking forward out the windows to the gray sky.

They will conquer, he knows they will, hand in hand they will thrive through it all and come out of it victorious into the bright sunset and beyond. Holding his kids beside him and forming a home of four, the home he always dreamed to have, the home he mourned every time he thought it could never happen, the home he now realized he could have. He could have it because he believes it. He has hope, he has love, and, for the first time in more than ten years, he's looking forward to the future with defiance in his stare and the strength of a thousand men. If he had to fight, he's more than willing.

He left the sweater and slippers where they were and with strong strides, he went straight to the bathroom door.

His love needed him.                                                                                                                             

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🌼Thank you for reading Chapter 30 UwU

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