Everything hurts. Your side feels as if it's on fire, like your insides are burning and your breathing getting harder to maintain. You thought you knew pain from before, like prickling yourself on a cactus, but this—this is a different kind of pain. Your muscles contract in pain, in agony and you wish it would all just stop. Distantly, you hear your name being called out though it sounds gibberish and strange, like you were underwater.  Your body moves up and down and you scream for the movement to stop but all you get in response are shushes from someone in front of you. Am I on a horse? You feel the animal lunge forwards and you slump against the rider, wrapping your arms weakly around them. Who is this? You can't bring yourself to care through the pain, tears prickling at the corner of your eyes, each step the horse takes making the bullet in you lodge even further within. You can feel your blood pulse around the wound, you can feel it leak down your side, warm.

"—worry Y/n," Someone says but you cant distinct their voice, your eyes fluttering open and closed, trying to keep your breathing in control. Something tells you to stay awake but your eyelids feel as if they have weights on them as they close shut, losing consciousness.

_______

"—she okay?"

So many questions flurry around you, your ears not registering them and you panic, the feeling of hands on your bare skin. Your skin. It seemed to have gotten worse, your skin now feeling like it's fully on fire, dipped into lava and sweat beads at your forehead. You so desperately wish for the pain to leave but it doesn't and you're still left with your vision swimming, distorted. You feel something press against your lips,  a bottle it seems, the liquid flowing out of it but you don't open your mouth and it drips down your chin. The taste is bitter and if you were able to scrunch your nose in disgust, you would. A hand gently brushes your hair and the bottle is pushed back to your lips.

"Drink, it will help with your pain," The voice speaks softly to you, their tone smooth and gentle and you can't help but listen to them, opening your mouth just enough for the liquid to go through. It's nasty, it's alcohol, you notice. You know this because sometimes you would test taste the drinks that Mr. Rick would bring back from different towns he visited. You exhale a breath shakily as you feel hands back on your skin, tearing your shirt as you feel a slight breeze dance on your skin. You wait for the pain to decrease but it does the complete opposite and now your whole body is on fire. A scream rips from your throat, the hands on you now frantically moving at a faster rate.

"We need to get it out of her!" A panicked voice speaks out, loud and right next to you. It sounds like Yunho but you're too distorted to be sure. Distantly, you hear someone agree and it's not long before you feel yourself being gently pushed on to the ground and someone petting your hair.

"This is going to hurt, Y/n, but we need to get this out of you." That voice. You know that voice, it was San. His hands brush through your hair and it strangely feels like the touch of your mother; warm and gentle, like home. You feel a hand slip into yours, gentle and you cling on to it, your grip tight.

A minute passes by like an hour before you feel a piece of metal touch your side, it's sharp. It doesn't move for a moment as your anxiety rises.

Then, you scream. Your wails are loud and echo around you, the one holding your hand cursing under his breath as your grip gets even tighter that you're sure to bruise him but you don't care. All you care about is the pain in your side and the feeling of something digging around in you, scraping. You've never felt anything like this before.

"It'll go away soon, Y/n," A soft, feathery voice speaks into your ear,"I'm sorry."

________

The sounds of hushed whispers fills your ears, the quiet crackle of a fire playing in the background. You're warm, you notice, and when you try to move pain erupts faintly earning a moan from you. Something next to you moves quickly and the warmth that you felt is now gone.

"Y/n? Don't move too much," Someone says and now you can clearly make a distinction of who it is. You groan and manage to open your eyes and at first everyone looks like shadows but when your vision clears you see Wooyoung next to you, a worried  expression plastered on his face but you notice something else in his eyes. Guilt. You open your mouth to speak but you change your mind and turn away, your throat dry.

"Y/n!" A familiar voice whispers and you turn your head to the right, Yunho's face so close to yours it makes you squeak. He furrows his eyebrows in confusion but then widens his eyes and backs away, shaking his head.

"Sorry! I got you water! Seonghwa is making you some medicine!" He says and you notice a jug in his hand. Your mouth waters at the sight of water and he notices your expression, walking to you and you expect him to place it next to you but he doesn't, instead he bends down and brings the jug close to your mouth.

You flinch back but the pain in your side flares and you wince, scrunching your nose and gritting your teeth. God, that really hurts. Yunho takes the flask away in panic and quickly moves to check your side but you shake your head, muttering a "Im Fine." He nods and then brings the flask back up to your lips.

"Open up~!" Yunho hums and you don't fight him, opening your mouth just enough for him to tilt the flask on your lips, allowing you to drink. It feels like heaven in a bottle, you didn't even realize how thirsty you were until Yunho takes the flask away saying how there was no more and that he'd have to go and get some.

"You know, we noticed the clothes you had on," Yunho says and eyes you suspiciously,"How did you get them?" You gulp and you know for a fact that there's some sweat on your forehead, your eyes wavering. You were always bad at lying. Your mother had told you this numerous of times. Yunho waits for you to respond and the look on his face make you even more nervous.

"Wooyoung....bought them for me," You say in such a quiet voice you're surprised he even heard you. You hope that your tone was at least somewhat believable for your sake but from the look on his face you know that it was nowhere near believable. If they find out Wooyoung left me, he'd be in big trouble.

"Wooyoung didn't have enough to buy you all of this ," Yunho deadpans and you bite your lip, looking away but only to glance at Wooyoung who isn't looking at either of you. The air is thick with tension and you're afraid to open your mouth to answer. You don't even notice the other members watching you.

"Y/n, tell us the truth." This time it's San who speaks and his tone of voice is so clipped and full of something else that you can't pinpoint. The pain on your side seems to increase but you don't react to it and instead exhale a breath.

"I stole them," You mutter and wander your eyes over to San who doesn't look surprised the slightest. He only raises a brow and nods his head before he casting his dark gaze to Wooyoung.

"Why did she steal those, Wooyoung?" The said boy doesn't reply and only picks at his fingers, completely ignoring the older of the two. You don't know what to say or do in the situation. Should you blurt it already and spare an argument or should you just stay silent and watch Wooyoung get fussed at? You just want to lay back down and sleep, ignore the pain in your side but you can't seem to do that, not at this moment. It seems like hours has passed before Wooyoung finally speaks up, his voice on edge.

"Because I wasn't there," He says vaguely,"I wasn't there to buy her clothes. But I was there when I got her shot." The temperature in the air feels as if it dropped, so silent that you're sure they can hear your heart beating incredibly fast. Got her shot. Does he think....? He laughs sarcastically and gets up from the ground beside you, fists clenched. His face is full of anger, regret and guilt all in one, swirling in his dark eyes and you wish you could do something but he opens his mouth.

"I left her alone," He says in a broken voice that has your heart splintering in two. Somehow the pain in your heart now meets the one on your side.

"Why would you do that? Knowing she's-," San pauses and glances at you for just a split second before speaking again,"We told you to stay together." 

"I made a mistake! Just like you did!" The younger's voice is now loud and booming, so loud that even Yunho quickly ushers to shush him but he doesn't listen, taking small steps towards San's direction, the others looking between them.

San is fuming like a thousand scorching suns from Wooyoung's response but he doesn't explode into action but instead feigns confusion, head tilted as his stance remains composed. He reminds you of a snake ready to strike.

"Oh, don't give me that stupid look, you know exactly who I'm talking about," Wooyoung muses in a taunting tone of voice, eyes glinting. This Wooyoung sounds nothing like the one you met before, the one who was playful and nice.

"Wooyoung, enough-"

"No, let him keep talking," San interrupts Hongjoong which surprises everyone, the look of disbelief on the older male's face that quickly morphs to anger, lips tugged downwards. From the looks of it, everyone respected Hongjoong. But now, now it doesn't seem to matter to San as his anger had a mind of its own.

"Is that why you bought Y/n,huh?" Wooyoung's words anger San even more to the point you can see steam coming out of his ears. What is he talking about? San doesn't respond but you know he's struggling to, not knowing what to say.

"You didn't buy her because you felt bad," Wooyoung chuckles darkly,"You bought her because she reminded you of-" Everything in front of you moves so quickly. A punch to Wooyoung's face sets everything off like a bomb. Yunho rushes up to pull the fighting boys apart, Jongho doing the same. Your heart beats so quickly and your breathing quickens.

"Enough!" A voice booms and the boys are pulled apart, breathing heavily, their eyes wild. Seonghwa stands between them, furious, his jaw clenched and his eyebrows furrowed.

"The both of you apologize." Seonghwa demands in such a tone that you would've thought he was in charge. Both San and Wooyoung make the same face, trying to back away but Yunho and Jongho stop them.

"I'm not apologizing,he knows I'm right," Wooyoung spits out and manages to break free from Jongho's hold, giving San one last look before storming his way past everyone and out of sight.

"Yeosang." Seonghwa turns his head to call out to someone and you see a man with dark hair, his eyes intense and you quickly realize it was the man you saw the first day you met them. He nods before following after the younger.

"San, you know better." The said boy doesn't say anything and instead he keeps his head down. Seonghwa sighs and gives signal for Yunho to let him go before looking at you.

"You should rest, I'll make sure to have something for you to eat when you wake," His tone softens only a bit but he's obviously still upset. Your voice seems to be gone so you only nod and scoot down, careful not to hurt yourself. Your eyes close and you try to shut your mind off but one single thought won't leave your head, haunting you.

Who was Wooyoung talking about?

[ this was boring buttttttt anyways ateez roty heheh ] also pls ignore mistakes i know i'm a dummy