"I feel like you have something tell me"

I look at Luca as we sat in the cafe that's become so familiar to us.

"I do," I said "But now it feels like it's kinda dumb"

He furrows his brows "Dumb? Now I'm curious" He smiles softly.

I sigh "Well, We're only friends but Felix told me I should tell you this"

He sits up straight, no longer leaning back "I'm all ears"

I bite the inside of my cheek before saying "I'm sorta back with my ex"

His eyebrows raise "Sorta?" He chuckles "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I am back with him"

He looks my face over before asking "The one that things are complicated with?"

I nod "Yeah and trust me it's still complicated but—" I look away "I love him"

"Makes sense" I look at him "But you do know loving someone doesn't always make them right for you"

I stare at him and he looks away and out the window "Good thing he is right for me" I said, feeling a bit bitter toward the male.

-

I lay on my stomach, my chin on his torso-looking at him while he plays with my hair. I smile softly at him "How was your day?" I ask.

"Good," He said "I hung around Chan and Changbin and I forgot how I missed it"

"I told you it would all be okay" I whisper, "They missed you just as much as you missed them"

His hands stop playing with my hair as he looks into my eyes, "I love you Minho"

I smile at him, "I love you" I said back, missing those words. I sat up and kissed him softly. His hand goes to my cheek and he leans more into the kiss.

His hand leaves my cheek and grabs my waist, pulling to straddle him as he sits up. Never breaking the kiss as his hands run up my shirt and to my burning skin that only he can ignite in such a way.

I pull away and his lips go straight to my neck, kissing the area and most likely leaving marks but I didn't care.

My heart pounded and I pushed him, making him lay back down. He didn't stop me as my hands run up his chest. He didn't stop me but I still noticed the slight hesitance in his eyes. He didn't stop me as he did before. He didn't stop me and I now knew why he stopped me all the other times. He stopped me because he was afraid.

My hands froze as they reach his chest. I froze and maybe it was because I hope it wasn't what I thought.

"Minho" He spoke and I didn't move as he grabs my hands and moved them away. I watched him sit up and I got off of him, looking away "Look at me please"

I look at him slowly and see him take off his shirt, my stomach dropping at the sight. My vision blurred as I looked away again "Jisung" I shook my head "I-I"

"This is why," He said "It's why I couldn't come back right away"

I look at him again and my eyes go to the scar on his chest. "W-What happened?"

He sighs lowly "That night Moon shot me"

My eyes snap up to his, my eyebrows pushed together and I shook my head "What?"

I felt dizzy. I felt like I could throw up. I said multiple times to myself that I would do anything for him and telling myself that meant I would keep him safe.

Ever since we were young that is what I did. Maybe it was never to the extent of this but I always covered for him with his dad and I always got him out of shit with the cops because though I was reckless he was too and sometimes I had to put my shit aside because I couldn't let him get into trouble.

I found him and he suddenly was no longer just reckless but he was deep into a dangerous place. Involved with people that could kill him in seconds and when I found out I was terrified because I knew I had to do more and I knew eventually it would come down to something we both didn't like until he started convincing me that we were okay and well—he then left me.

"I would have come back right after everything but—" I look at him as I felt tears fall from my eyes "I couldn't" He grabbed my face and wiped my tears, tears in his own eyes as he says "I would have come back to you immediately Darling I promise you that"

I look down "But you couldn't?"

"I was in bed for a month and by the time I was mostly healed I came back and looked for you" I look up at him "And I saw how hard you tried to be okay and I was so close to approaching you but I was too much of a coward"

I grab his forearms "I waited for you" I pull away and sigh loudly "I fucking waited for you for two months, even after everyone said that you were dead!" I roughly wipe my tears as he watches me, "I wouldn't have cared, Jisung I wouldn't have questioned it if you came back to me"

"I'm here!" He said loudly, grabbing my hand and placing it on his scar "I'm here" He said more gently.

I frown and look down at my hand on his chest "I don't want to hurt you" I said, pulling my hand away. Afraid I would hurt him.

He chuckles lowly and kisses me again. I lean into the kiss. I felt more guilty than ever. He was hurt and I was busy trying to fill his absence.

Jisung pulls away and looks at me "I'm fine now" He said softly, tucking a piece of hair behind my ears "I'm okay"

"I love you so much" I said.

⚠️SEXUAL CONTENT⚠️

He smiles and kisses my cheek and to my ear "Can I show you how much I love you?" Chills ran down my spine.

He looks into my eyes and I nod "Yes" I said and he crashes his lips back onto mine. I lay down as his lip follows mine. He pulls away briefly pulling my shirt off and exposing my chest as he kisses down.

I let out a satisfied sigh, feeling his lips on my body. I only ever wanted his lips to touch me like this. He pulls off my pants along with my boxer and I felt so exposed but not in a bad way. He always made me feel good, he was always the only person that ever made me feel like I was worth more than I felt.

I whine, feeling his tongue slide up my hard dick. I look down as he kisses down my thighs before sitting up and unbuckling his jeans. "You are always so beautiful darling"

I frown "You mean it?"

He leans down and nods, kissing my lips lightly "Always" He kisses my cheeks and Before he noticed what I was doing, I slip my hand past his waistband and grabbed his cock.

He shudders from above me and I smirk, pumping his hard dick in my hands "I hope you waited for me" I whispered to him and his head falls into the nape of my neck. Just from his reaction, I knew he wasn't with anyone while he was gone.

"Minho" He groans into my ear "I missed your touch so fucking much" He pulls away from my neck and looks me in the eyes "I missed your mouth" He sits up and I let go of his leaking cock. His thumb glides along my bottom lip "So, so perfect"

I sit up and kiss his stomach "Want me to?" I look up at him and he watches me.

"Yes," He said and I smile, pulling down his pants and making his hard length spring up. I take it into my hand immediately.

God did I miss this. Taking him into my mouth and hearing his satisfied groans, his finger running through my hair as I suck his hard dick. I moan as I feel him grip my hair tightly as he hit the back of my throat.

"Fuck" he groans and I pull away for air. Running my hand up his thigh before pumping his cock.

"Am I still good enough?" I ask and he nods, his eyes heavy.

"Fucking amazing" He leans down and kisses me hungrily, making me giggle into the kiss. Kicking off his pants and now we were left completely naked for the first time in months.

It felt like a dream. His hands were all over my body and mine on his. I missed this. Everything about it. It was like nothing could come between us, we laid everyone out in the open in these moments.

I felt his hands run down my stomach and go in between my legs, going to the place I needed him most. Putting one finger in and I let out a shaky breath, pulled away from his lips and I tried to get familiar with this feeling again but knowing my body wanted more no matter if it was unprepared or not.

I haven't been with anyone like this since him and I never did it to myself because, well—I only wanted him.

"No," I said, shaking my head "I-I want you"

"I don't want to hurt you, darling"

I look at him, feeling him put another finger in and I groan "Please" I beg before he finally gave in and pulled his fingers out, lining himself up between my legs before slowly entering my unprepped hole.

I groan loudly and I couldn't stop myself from grabbing his shoulders and digging my nails into his skin. The burning feeling of him entering me sent tears to my eyes but I wanted this. I wanted him not his fingers.

"I'm sorry" He apologized and shook my head.

"Move, I want you to move"

"But I don't want to hurt you"

I grab his face and kiss him softly, feeling him start to move slowly and moan lowly into the kiss. Pulling him closer to my body. I didn't care if he hurt me, I would give anything to have him this close to me.

Feeling tears run down my cheeks as I started to feel all the pleasure run through my body. I moan as I felt him start to go faster and the sound of his skin meeting mine filled the room.

Feeling his lips on my shoulders as I throw my head back. I never want to lose this. I don't want to lose him.

"I fucking love you, baby," I said, pulling him up to meet my eyes "You know that?"

"I know darling" He kisses my tears away.

And I did. I loved him. I love him. And I will always choose him.

Omg, is this the first official smut of 'dear darling'? AND I LOVE YOU'S? I'm giggling.

but on a more serious note, I love them.

Also i've been kind of not loving my smut writing recently so i apologize if it's been bad