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𝐽𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑏𝑒𝑟, 𝑡𝒉𝑒 𝑡𝑟𝑢𝑒 𝑠𝑝𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝐶𝒉𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑚𝑎𝑠 𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝒉𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡. – 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑷𝒐𝒍𝒂𝒓 𝑬𝒙𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔.

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I recall times where I longed to go home for the festive period. Home used to be lively and warm, with twinkling lights and Mom's cooking pleasing our nostrils. With the holiday drawing nearer, the lively vibe now carries a somber tone. Memories of my parents' smile linger in the quiet house, prompting me to ask the question, what is home?

Is it that warm feeling when people around me genuinely enjoy my presence? Or that sense of relief when my mind escapes problems as soon as pleasing sounds reach my ears?

Some might disagree with my bias, saying home is where you're embraced with affection—family. But for me, it feels foreign, considering home is where my parents found their final peace.

Their faces, once filled with delight, are now absent, casting a shadow over the festivities. The sounds of Christmas carols amplify the silence, making me long for the time when their laughter blended with the seasonal tunes.

Everyday while I drown in my emotions, I wish for them to be here. I yearn for their comforting words when I'm at my worst and I desire for their support when I have no one to lean back on but instead their absence created a void in my heart.

The festive decorations just make the emptiness stand out, emphasizing the difference between the past Christmases and the reality of the present.

In the peaceful moment of the season, I picture a Christmas dinner table adorned with their warmth but the empty chairs sting as constant reminders of the void they left, a gap that can never be filled.

If I could share my unsaid words on this silent night:

Mom, the holiday lights may shine, but they can't match the brightness of your soul. Christmas isn't the same since the fire took you away. I miss your laughter, hugs, and the love that made our home special. Regret weighs on me, wishing I could turn back time. I promise to honor your memory, even in this season of emptiness.

Dad. One in a million dad. My superhero. Always coming to my rescue when I am in trouble but when you needed saving, I wasn't there. The holiday lights flicker in my tears as I remember the call I received in school about the fire accident. Only if I could teleport and bring it to a stop. I hope you're watching, finding comfort in knowing I'm okay, even though the festive lights have dimmed.

You both mean the world to me, and in the stillness of this Christmas, I cherish the timeless love we share. Merry Christmas, wherever you are.

© Emmanuel Iwebema.

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