(warning: mentioning of triggering subject)

CHAPTER 7

spots on white canvas
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"I'm telling you I'm not singing after the performance you just delivered! Not going to happen."

Harin shakes her head in refusal as I hand the microphone in her direction, watching how her cheeks are flushed pink.
I tilt my head to the side, rounding my eyes and pout.

"Pretty please?"

She pops her mouth open, her eyes widening at my begging expression.

"I'm going to embarrass myself, Tae. It's not happening." She says before playfully pinch my cheek with her rather cold fingers, but still her touch makes my cheek warm.
I bite my bottom lip before leaning back and smile at her.

"You'll sing for me. I know you will. Just wait." I confidently say before leaning back, feeling the wall behind me and glance ahead at the television in front of us, millions of songs ready to be played.

"Confident much?" I see Harin cross her arms from the corner of my eye alongside her brow cocking up. I hum in response, shrugging my shoulders slightly before a chuckle escape my lips.

Harin giggles before shaking her head and lean back as well.

"So... I've told you stuff about me, what I do, where I work. I don't seem to know much about you Mr. Mystery."

I turn my head to meet her gaze, but she keeps looking forward and I watch how the faint multicolored lights from the karaoke-room hits her features perfectly.
I nibble on my bottom lip, the guilt from not telling her the truth creeping up on me once again.

"What do you want to know?" I ask her, watching as a pleased smile graze her glistening lips.

"What's your favorite season?"

I furrow my brows at her question. But at the same time I feel the pain in my stomach disappear right away, the way her calm voice fills up the room. The way she wants to know me personally.

"Fall. I love watching the leaves change their colors, how they drop to the ground making an entire painting on the ground without knowing."

She nods in approval.

"You like to paint?" She asks again, now turning her body towards mine, leaning forward slightly as her fisted palm holds up her head while watching me.

"I love painting. And going to galleries." I say with more enthusiasm now as she hits one of my absolute favorite topics. I can tell she notices, how her eyes widen a tiny bit with a glint inside her brown caramel eyes.  

"Favorite color?"

"Purple. And blue on a close second." I roll my lips together at my quick answer, knowing how much meaning the color purple had to me. Has to me.   

"Any pets?" She cutely crosses her fingers and close her eyes, making me laugh.

"Yes. I have a cute dog named— Tan."
I swallow, a small smile still evident on my lips from thinking about Yeontan. He's living with my parents and I miss him a lot, since I won't be able to see him when we have busy schedules.
Especially these past months where I haven't felt like myself.

"Tan? That's so cute. I had a cat named Yuri when my mother was still—"

Harin stops talking, her smile fading slowly.
I turn my head and look at her intensely, realizing she spoke about something she didn't really want to mention. I part my lips, not knowing what to say.
I catch her eyes and watch how she sends me an apologizing tight-lipped smile which still makes my heart skip a beat.

"My mother passed away 4 years ago. She died on a beautiful spring day, just as the news reported the cherry blossoms beginning. I remember I was lying with her in our old place, listening to her favorite songs while I had made her some lavender tea before heading out with some friends of mine. She had been ill for a few months dealing with mental issues. I knew it was serious, but I just didn't think the outcome would—"

My breath gets stuck in my throat and I reach over and grab her cold hand, rubbing small circles on her soft skin, watching how she struggles to speak.

"It's okay if you don't want to talk about it."
I whisper, feeling how her hand warms up at my touch. She sniffles once but looks at me again with determination in her eyes before she starts speaking once more.

"Late in the afternoon when I came home I found a note with my mothers handwriting. It said that she had headed out to Mapo Bridge and that I shouldn't worry about her anymore. That she was finally free from— from what had kept her captured for so long. I remember I rushed to the bridge, I ran all the way there with barely any clothes on. I frantically ran across the bridge several times, hoping she had regretted and was sitting somewhere. But she didn't."

Harin breathes out, a single tear escaping her eye, gliding down her porcelain skin. I reach my hand to her face, wiping it away with my thumb, lingering it there for some time.
I then swallow and retreat, letting her have some space.

"I'm really sorry to hear that, Harin. Your mother would be so proud of you, seeing you go to Ewha."

Harin looks at me with glossy eyes, nodding slowly to herself.

"She would. I know she's better now. She was in a very dark place when she was alive. No matter how much I tried I couldn't make life better for us. Because of—"

I hold my breath, waiting for her to continue, but she doesn't.
She takes in a deep breath and turn her gaze to me once more, her fond eyes taking in my entire frame.

"I guess I owe you a song now, don't I?" She then says followed by a cute wink that makes my chest warm.

I smile at her and nod slowly.

"Only if you want to."

She then grabs the small remote on the small table between us, scrolling past several songs before picking a song with a familiar artist. Hozier. One of my favorite artists.

She turns to me again and cutely points to the screen, biting her bottom lip.

"This one."

I nod eagerly at her, watching how her cheeks quickly turns pink and how her upper body tense nervously.

"I can't wait. I'm sure you sound just at beautiful as you are."

Harin turns her head at me, her mouth slightly agape in surprise at my words at her. She then breaks out in a smile before turning her face to the screen once more, pressing the play botton.

I lean back and watch as the verse comes up and when she starts to sing I close my eyes and focus on the melodic notes she delivers, how her smooth, almost angelic voice makes me captivated once more.        

His eyes and words are so icy
Oh but he burns
Like rum on the fire
Hot and fast and angry as he can be
I walk my days on a wire.

It looks ugly, but it's clean,
Oh momma, don't fuss over me.

The way he tells me I'm his and he is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine.

Looking at her again, I can tell this song has a meaning to her — the way she closes her eyes and really lets herself drift away to the slow beat, the way she pronounces the words so strong.
And then I wonder why this specific song means so much to her. Staring at her while she is in her own world I can't help pondering over her story about her mother. It broke my heart knowing her mother left this world like that.
Where was her father in this?

As the soft tunes slowly dies out I put my focus back on Harin and appreciate the view right in front of me.

Maybe I should paint this scenery one day.

The lines of the gorgeous brunette, sitting on a small stool with her legs crossed, her eyes closed. How her long strands of hair falls down on her back, the silhouette around her with different colored lights highlighting her unreal beauty.

"Was I that bad?"

I'm taken out of my trance by Harin's small voice, her eyes locked on my face. I shake my head and flash a bright smile at her.

"You sounded absolutely perfect. Just like I imagined."

Harin giggles low and hums in response. I smile as I watch her scroll the songs once more as I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket.

I grab it and narrow my eyes at the bright screen.

Fuck.

I had no idea it was this late.

"Something wrong?" Harin looks at me with big eyes.

I nibble on my bottom lip and stare at her. I don't want to leave her.

"I kind of have a curfew ..." I muffle out, hiding my face in my hands. I can hear Harin chuckle next to me and before I know it, she's in front of me, grabbing my hands from my face.

"Then let's go. Can't have you in trouble because of me, right?" She teases before starting to walk out, keeping my hand in hers and I feel my skin burn from her gentle touch.
I squeeze her hand in response, grab her jacket and then follow along.

As we stand outside in the crisp air, the dark night sky upon us the only sound audible is the faint traffic alongside music.
Harin lets go of my hand when we're not walking any more and I immediately miss her touch.

"Thank you. This night has been— amazing." She breathes out, hugging her own body.
I blink a few times, my stare falling to her plump, glossy lips.

"It really has. I should thank you somehow." I trail off, keeping my gaze on her, wanting to read her body language.

She bites her bottom lip slightly making me swallow.

"And how would you do that?"

No words are spoken as my hand automatically cups her cheek that's slowly turning red once more.
I smile at her before leaning into her. My other hand is shaking slightly, my mind busy with all kinds of thoughts. But the sound of my heart is beating so loud, I cant concentrate on nothing but her.
It feels like I'm going to explode.

Finally my lips touches her. Sparks are flying in every direction and the world is slowly disappearing around us along with all our worries, our troubles. The kiss is small, yet warm. I never knew a kiss so innocent could be so intimate and electrifying.
Our lips move in perfect sync, my hands feeling her small waist, pulling her closer to me, deepening the kiss.
I feel her warm hands on the back of my neck, tugging at my hair, playing with the ends of them. A smile grows on my face as her touch tickles, before pulling apart.

"Like that." I respond to her question, watching how her pink lips turn into a smile as she look up at me.
I lean down and place a gentle peck on the tip of her nose.

"I really have to go. I'm sorry..." I whisper to her.

"I'll text you." She pecks my cheek and back away. She reach out for her jacket that I had dropped onto the ground after our intimate kiss.

"Oh I'm sorry I didn't realize I dropped—"
I start saying but stop talking as I see a huge blue, almost purple, bruise on the inside of Harin's small arm — the fair skin painted in dark colors, the surrounding of it fading out in yellow tones.
It's only visible for a second but my brows automatically furrows at the sight, to which Harin hurriedly smiles and backs away, putting on her wool jacket.

As she walks away I stand still, watching as she moves further into the darkness but not until she turns around and flash a smile in my direction.

But the only thing I can think about is the grim, blue painting on her upper arm that somehow makes my stomach worry.

But who knows.

Maybe she fell and hurt herself.

Maybe.     

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A/N NOTE 💌:

surprise update !!
i haven't been doing much today, so i took the opportunity to write a new chapter for this story.
hope you guys liked it — and what did you think about the kissing scene?
i really liked writing it.
i was in my feels ... c you soon 💓