me: stomachache, muscle strain -> disobey my grandma's will to play badminton -> grandma: you must go, don't be such a btch

my sister: doesn't want to go -> disobey my grandma's will -> grandma: it's okay then don't go

me: okay then life isn't fair

my grandma: of course it isn't

my grandma: I have been taking care of you for long like taking care of a baby

me: you don't take care of me like a baby

my grandma: can't you just say thanks?

my sister: OML GRANDMA THANKS SO MUCH FOR TAKING CARE OF ME *in a baby voice*

my grandma: yes, sweetheart

me: *murmuring to myself* she's just fcking trying to please grandma when she doesn't even mean it half of the times

my grandma: pleasing the others like that is right *continues scolding me*

me: why doesn't she have to go?

my grandma: she will be tired from walking and playing badminton and she has exams tomorrow and two subjects!!! her body is weak!!

me: *thinking* since when she cares when I have 2 subjects a day for 14 days for exams, and I still have to play badminton

my grandma: your body is weaker than her so you have to go

me: *thinking* what the fck, where's logic

swearing I guess, down there
although I already swore up there sksksksk

okay so I HAVE BEEN SO PISSED LATELY I LITERALLY WANT TO SHOUT AT FCKING EVERYONE WHY IS LIFE LIKE THAT I- I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY JUST I KEEP SWEARING UNDER MY BREATH EVERY SINGLE DAY

I HAVE BEEN BOTTLING UP MY ANGER FOR AT LEAST A WEEK AND I FEEL LIKE I WANNA EXPLODE LIKE HECK. I AM SO SO ANGRY SO I DECIDE TO SHARE IT HERE EVEN THOUGH I MAY SOUND LIKE A BTCH IN THE STORY BUT WHO CARES?

the story starts like this. there are some activities for us to choose to join and the grade will be shown on the report card. as a person who likes drama, I pick drama, obviously. then the teacher is picking scriptwriters. I didn't join the picking of scriptwriter but my bestie A does. A's passage for the audition was goddamn good, I thought she would be accepted but she didn't. A's other best friend B (my friend at that time) was picked instead and another girl C who got a scholarship was picked

okay, not really my problem. then the fcking problem occurred. B begged us to help her write the scripts. A, being such a loyal friend, agreed and invited me as well. me, thinking A and B are my friend, accepted

the problem started from here

we discovered that C is someone with absolutely NO EXPERIENCE IN FCKING SCRIPTWRITING and NO BRAIN AT ALL. SHE WROTE FCKING POINT FORM FOR THE SCRIPTS AND SHE WROTE RIDICULOUS STORY!!!!!! for example, parents clapping their hands and cheering when their daughter LOST IN THE MUSIC COMPETITION!!!

ARE THEIR PARENTS DCKS NO OFFENSE BUT THAT'S MY QUESTION!!

we spent a lot of time clearing the trash that she had left, ending up spending a lot of time. she wasn't always online when we were discussing the scripts, but she always gave those RIDICULOUS IDEAS such as the stage caught fire and stuff. LIKE WHY THE FCKING HELL WOULD THE STAGE SUDDENLY CATCH ON FIRE, THE STORY PLOT IS ABOUT CHASING DREAMS!!!!!!!

okay, the first draft submitted to the teacher. the teacher wasn't happy. had to redo. I know the teacher didn't like creative stuff but if we put this show on stage, no one will like it. therefore, I stood out in the group and pointed out that I no longer fcking care about what the teacher thought. WE WERE GOING TO TRY SOMETHING NEW. SOMETHING NEW. IF THE TEACHER SCOLDED THEN SCOLDED I DIDN'T FCKING CARE. WE HAD TO MAKE THE AUDIENCE ENJOY THIS SHOW. WE. HAD. TO

B agreed immediately, supporting my decision from the very start. that was when I realized how alike we were. A hesitated then agreed as well. DON'T LET ME FCKING START ON C. SHE WAS VERY SKEPTICAL SINCE SHE DIDN'T WANT THE TEACHER TO FCKING SCOLD HER ASS. THEN THEN THEN, HER TONE JUST WENT LIKE "IF YOU GUYS ARE SCOLDED THEN NONE OF MY BUSINESS"

okay fine. A, B and I have been working on the scripts every night, while C was fcking offline and not being helpful. she suggested all the ideas she had suggested already in the group and we had to spend time fcking deny her. she didn't even change the scripts and help us fcking write it. she went offline at 9 pm WHILE WE WERE WORKING UNTIL 11 PM

we submitted the scripts, teacher ending up liking it. C GRABBED OUR CHANCE AND DID ALL THE FCKING EXPLANATION. THE TEACHER ENDED UP THINKING THAT WAS HER ENTIRE IDEA LIKE WHAT THE FCKING HELL. also, when I was discussing with her (ME BEING SUCH A FCKING IDIOT), she didn't contribute any but she directly headed to the teacher AND TOLD HER ALL MY IDEAS, MAKING ME SEEM LIKE A STUPID IDIOT STANDING AT HER SIDE WITHOUT CONTRIBUTING ANY FUCKING THING!!!!

okay, fine. my bad, shouldn't have done that. time for the third draft. as usual, C, BEING THAT PERFECT STUDENT WITH THE FUCKING SCHOLARSHIP AND ACTUALLY AS STUPID AS FUCKING HELL, suggested all the most stupid ideas ever. fine, whatever, we were going to do our stuff and her part, while she was out there chilling

GUESS WHAT HAPPENED NEXT!!!! the teacher told us not to share the scripts with the others to read. THAT IDIOT GAVE THE SCRIPTS TO HER BEST FRIEND TO READ I- LIKE AREN'T YOU FCKING AFRAID OF TEACHER'S SCOLDING THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST FUCKING FOLLOW WHAT THE TEACHER SAID????????? 

sharing the scripts isn't FAIR for the others who are trying to grab a character to act. we are all super pissed. THAT FUCKING IDIOT. RUINING STUFF, NOT DOING STUFF, MESSING UP STUFF, CLAIMING THE FINAL FCKING VICTORY!!

don't let me get started on the teacher. we submitted the third draft, then?

the teacher kept telling A, B and I to shut up while we are discussing!!!!!! AND WHAT ABOUT C??????? SHE CHATS WITH HER FRIENDS AND NO ONE FCKING CARES!!!!!!!!

I was the Deputy Stage Manager of the team as well as a scriptwriter, I have thought about the ideas of how the stage could be cut and I shared it with the group, they all approved. when the teacher was staging, I ran up because I needed to tell her about our thoughts. the conversation was like that:

me: teacher?

teacher: I am busy now, what's up?

me: the scriptwriting group and I have thought about how to cut the stage into thrice so it will be easier for the stage crew to move the stuff. the idea is like... thanks, teacher

teacher: I see, you are the deputy stage manager and you are the scriptwriter. ARE YOU PLANNING ON BEING THE DIRECTOR AS WELL? OKOK I KNOW HOW GOOD YOU ARE, STOP SHOWING OFF AND JUST DO YOUR OWN JOB

C: teacher?

teacher: yes?

C: *repeats what I have said again*

teacher: good idea! *trying it out*

FUCK

I DON'T KNOW, I FEEL LIKE TALKING BACK BUT I DIDN'T

for B, she had been changing the scripts when it wasn't her turn to act and the teacher called her daydreaming. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY

in a show, A, B, and I always tried to balance the scripts of the characters, so everyone has something to say. however, the teacher said, "if every side character has the number of scripts that are nearly the same, then it isn't a show"

okay fine. THEN WHY DID YOU GIVE C SO MANY CHANCES TO SHOW OFF HER DANCING AND GUITAR, MORE PEOPLE ARE TALENTED THAN HER BUT THEY ONLY GET A MINOR ROLE!!! IT ISN'T FAIR FOR THE ACTRESSES WHO CAN PLAY PIANO GODDAMN WELL BUT CAN ONLY BE A FCKING TEACHER WHO ONLY HAS A SCENE'S SCREENTIME!!!!

in scriptwriting, she suggested HOW FAR I'LL GO to play the guitar in BUSKING but WHO THE HECK WOULD SING HOW FAR I'LL GO IN BUSKING ESPECIALLY THE MOOD OF THE MAIN CHARACTER ISN'T RIGHT???? when we all opposed and chose Believer instead, C kept suggesting aggressively by saying playing the guitar in the song BELIEVER! let me say again, in the song BELIEVER!!!!! her guitar is acoustic are you sure that it's the right one??? 

me being me, I exposed the fact that she wanted to play the guitar. she being her, she kept saying that she was just suggesting while she clearly was trying to earn more screentime for herself. A, B, and I all could sense it. imagine, if you truly care about the show more than showing off, would you suggest playing the guitar in believer?

BELIEVER, I mean, BELIEVER. that's a rock song!!!!!!!!!

she offered to compose a song, but she hasn't even STARTED COMPOSING when it is the deadline???? SERIOUSLY, IF YOU OFFER TO COMPOSE A SONG THEN DO IT!!!

you know what's the worst? THE TEACHER KEPT THINKING THAT SHE WAS THE BRAIN IN OUR SCRIPTWRITING GROUP AND PRAISED HER FOR NOTHING WHILE WE DID ALL THE FUCKING DIRTY WORK FOR HER!!!!! THE TEACHER TREATED US LIKE FUCKING TRASH WHILE WE WERE THE ONE WHO DID WORK!!

I DON'T NEED PRAISE BECAUSE IT'S MY JOB TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT, BUT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT I AM SHOWING OFF? IMAGINE GIVING THE WHOLE THING C TO DO, THE WHOLE THING WILL BE CHAOS

all the things that A, B and I have done, were contributed to give C a perfect A for this subject

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

I really don't want to say this here, but I have been fcking crying when I write this. my hands are shaking and it's very hard to concentrate on the words

yea, the world messes up, isn't it

first time swearing on wattpad to the public, this will not be the last time judging from my life rn