[ chapter four - different ]
season five, episode sixteen

Dear Diary,

It's all gone wrong, Rick's being shunned away for what he did to Pete, but Pete also had to move away from Jesse, Ron and Sam.

I haven't really talked to Enid—especially not after what happened in the woods. I don't even know what happened in the woods to be honest. It didn't feel like she was my friend, or becoming my friend.

It felt different.

✵~✵

ABI PLACED HER PEN DOWN, sighing loudly as her fist met her cheek, keeping her head up as she leaned against the desk. Her entire day had been spent doodling on a page in her diary until there was absolutely no space left—the girl assumed it was about midday by now.

She pushed back, legs helping as she began to spin slowly on her chair, bored out of her mind. They'd been in Alexandria ages now and Abi had only been to the school about twice—Maggie and Rick having forced her those times. Ellie bit her lip as she continued to spin, not worrying about getting dizzy.

"Abi!" She heard a voice call from downstairs, the girl pushing her foot against the desk to stop her movements, head spinning a little as she stumbled to get up. "Abi!" Carl repeated.

Abi groaned as she made her way across the hall and down the stairs, rubbing her forehead after not being exposed to the outside light since the day before.

"Wow, you look awesome," Carl sarcastically remarked after having looked at the large jumper that accompanied her black leggings. Abi pulled a face as Carl pulled one back.

"Why'd you call me down?"

"Because you've been upstairs all day and i didn't do a whole lot of school but i'm pretty sure that's not healthy, plus Judith missed you." Abi smiled at the baby that sat on the couch, babbling with her toys as some saliva dropped down her shirt. The sound of the door opening startled them all, what was even more surprising was who came from behind it.

"Dad!" Carl exclaimed, running towards his father who he hadn't seen for a while—not after Deanna had him on locked down. The baggy jumpered girl walked forward as well, Rick encasing her in a hug after his son. The man kissed the top of her head before they both pulled away, the blonde smiling brightly at the man she had come to know as family the past year.

"You okay?" The boy with the sheriff's hat questioned his father, taking notice of the bandages that plastered his face.

Rick nodded as the fruit bowl in the kitchen caught Abi's attention, slowly straying away from the father-son conversation as she grabbed an apple from the wooden bowl.

"I heard about the meeting," Carl stated. Abi turned around, holding the fresh fruit in her hand as she took a large bite, the juices pouring into her mouth—signifying the first drink and food of her day. Carl had told Abi all about the meeting, ever since her daddy's farm and being given a gun Carl had been interested in joining whatever the adults were doing, dangerous or not. It bothered her from time to time because the boy would always drag her along with him.

She still remembered talking to the much older boy in the barn her mother and brother were killed, Carl having dragged the older girl with him as they both got a very big telling off by Shane—Abi getting an even bigger one from Maggie.

Still, she wanted to be at the meeting. Abi wanted to have a say on Rick staying, she wanted him to stay. For Carl and Judith. That was all. They were why she wanted the group to stay in Alexandria. No one else.

"You're staying home. Both of you," Rick pointed at both of them, the teenagers sighing loudly as Abi took a smaller bite from the red fruit in her right hand.

"That's what it is now, right? Home." Carl's stopped his father from leaving. Abi frowned, thinking do the answer herself. Truth be told, she didn't believe in this people—especially not after their reactions to the day before. It seemed like a place worth staying, not for the residents though. They were extra lives on their hands.

Rick turned to his son, hesitating before responding.

"Yeah."

"They need us," Abi tilted her head as she listened to Carl talking, taking her another bite. "They'll die without us."

Rick walked closer as he took in a breath, signalling Abi over. She took a few steps closer to the boys, apple still in hand. "I might have to threaten one of them," Rick announced, almost weary of the kid's answer. Abi nodded, she understood why he might feel like that—she knew the people of Alexandria weren't fit for the real world.

"I could have to kill one of them."

"You won't."

"I might," Rick declared once again.

Carl shook his head, "You have to tell them."

"I told them last night."

"You have to tell them so they can hear you," Abi looked outside, biting her lip as she realised she'd much rather be walking out there than listening to Rick and Carl communicate back and forth. She nodded as a goodbye, walking towards the door, throwing away her apple. Leaving the two Grimes to their own conversation.

✵~✵

ABI WALKED AROUND ALEXANDRIA, unsure of what to do as she was already late to school—there was no reason to go now. Jessie Anderson standing on her porch alone caught her attention, the girl's impulse taking over as she walked towards the woman.

"Hi," the woman said sweetly to the girl. "Abi, right?" Abi smiled and nodded as she walked closer to Jessie. The older blonde walked down the steps, drink in hand.

"Just wanting to see how you were all doing, after the other day," Abi said trying to make conversation, truly wanting to know if they were okay.

"Thank you sweetie," Abi stopped herself from flinching at the man. It was what Lori would always call her, what her mom would always call her.

"I saw you hanging out with Enid. Must be nice having another girl your age to be friends with." Abi pursed her lips and nodded. The butterflies in her stomach doing a patterned routine as she thought of what had happened between her and Enid. Why?

"Ron's been talking about you and Carl. Might like to hang out again." To be fully honest, Abi had forgotten about Ron and Mikey. They weren't big parts of her life. At least, not yet.

Abi felt herself nod. She had tuned in and out of the conversation, to lost in her own thoughts. She did this a lot, focus in what she was thinking other than what a person was saying. People would usually complain but Jessie seemed to not mind it. Like she could read through the girl.

Abi turned her head, noticing someone walk into the infirmary. She remembered how Tara was put in there after hitting her head on the run. She bit her lip, trying to figure out what to say next.

"Um- I have to go. Hope you guys are okay?" Abi cringed slightly at her words. Jessie smiled kindly at the girl before nodding and walking into her own house.

As she made her way towards the infirmary a small noise caught her attention. She froze when she saw Enid going over the walls. Again.

Abi changed her direction, right to where Enid was going. "What are you doing?" The blonde girl announced causing Enid to look down in shock. Enid sighed as she realised it was just Abi. "Climbing," the girl said.

"Just- why?" Abi asked trying to keep the conversations for a reason unknown. Enid took in a deep breath before she inserted another pole and kept moving up. Abi clenched her jaw before copying the girl's actions, unaware of the brunette boy watching from a distance, disappointed as he realised that it was natural—she had been before without him.

"Don't follow me," Enid said as she stopped moving again.

"Don't go," Abi bit back, ready to climb the wall. To Abi's surprise, Enid started to climb down. The blonde moved out of the way as Enid hit the ground.

"Happy?" Enid said sarcastically.

Abi's rolled her eyes. "Extremely." She remarked.

Enid scoffed at the girls words as she stuffed the poles into her pocket and began walking away. Abi sighed as she walked back to her house, completely abandoning the idea of the infirmary.

She opened the door to find Carl sitting on the table, like a dad waiting for his child who's gone out after curfew. Abi looked at him confused as she shut the door behind her.

"Have you gone outside of the walls?" Abi froze. Shit. She tugged her bottom lip between her teeth.

"Yeah, with you," Abi's voice went high—a clear distinction that she was lying. Along with her bright red face. Carl narrowed his eyes, standing up as his head tilted slightly.

"I saw you talking to Enid, ready to follow her over the gate."

"I was just threatening too. So she would get down," Abi reasoned. The girl started to walk up the stairs as Carl spoke up again.

"Why'd you care?" He asked curiously knowing the two girls didn't hang out, at least, not that he'd seen.

"I just don't want anyone else getting hurt," Abi said as she continued up the stairs. Carl sighed knowing their was something else the girl was talking about.

"What do you thinks gonna happen at the meeting?" Carl spoke, abandoning the old conversation.

Abi sighed in annoyance, realising the boy wasn't going to shut up. She reluctantly walked back down the stairs and sat on the sofa with him instead.

"Hopefully, they'll tell Rick to stay and punish Pete-"

"That's not what I asked," Carl interrupted. "What do you think is gonna happen. Not what you want to happen."

Abi took in a deal breath before shrugging. "I'm not sure. It would be nice to stay here. It's what your dad wants, I can tell. For you, for Judith. He'll try and keep it, but then again it is Rick Grimes. Many things could go wrong."

Carl laughed a little. "Reassuring," he joked before his face got a bit more serious. "Are you and Enid friends?"

Abi bit her lip, not wanting to answer. They weren't friends. Just two people who were apparently scared of each other. Abi was slowly starting to figure out why the girl intimidated her so much. But, Carl wouldn't know anything about this. He might not even think it's okay. She couldn't tell him.

She shrugged again. "Not really." The girl brought her knees up to her chest. "What about Ron and that stuff. Are you guys good friends?"

Carl nodded hesitantly. "Not sure the thing with my dad and Ron's dad is a big help on friendship. I thought you and Enid were friends. You ran over together. Held hands," he said the last part in a teasing manner causing the blonde to get confused.

"Well- I- we were scared." The girl stuttered through her words. "I don't know. Sometimes I feel weird. It's hard to explain. Just different. Different from others. From Maggie, you, Glenn, Tara anyone."

Carl nodded at the girls words, smirking lightly as he stopped himself from pointing out she might not be too different than Tara.

"How are you different?" He had already caught on to what the girl hadn't. He could tell. The way her eyes followed as she walked of. The way she held her hand tightly as they watched the scene. When they first got introduced, Abi's eyes never left the girl. He knew she liked Enid. He also knew Abi thought it was wrong, although she hadn't really said it, her completely avoiding it was his main clue.

Abi shrugged.

"I know." Carl said as Abi turned to face him, the redness still sparked across her pale skin.

"You know what?" Abi faked her confusion, fiddling with the pockets of her jeans.

"Enid," Carl said causing the girls breath to shorten. "I can tell," he had a small smirk on his face now.

"You're annoying me now. You can tell what?" The girl inquired, trying to act clueless. She did not want him to finish his sentence. Not one bit.

"It's okay, if you like her I mean." Abi shot up straight in an instant.

"I don't! I cant- what- why would I- I mean." Abi stuttered, speaking to quickly for her to understand.

"You'll know soon." Carl said walking up the stairs causing Abi to scoff.

"You'll know soon." Abi mocked, "What an idiot."

✵~✵

author notes-
Short chapter!! Little Carl and Abi scene with Carl knowing everything about the Abi before her.

STOPPPP i hate this so much, my writing was so awful i js kinda gave up so idk when this is gonna be published.. BUT chapters after act two were written whilst i was in a good time and didn't have stress, shitty friends and shitty schooling so they're much better meaning i won't have to fix a load of things 👍

okay, when i'm done with rewriting there is timeskip chapters (6x09-6x10) where we will get maggie + abi, lottie(unintroduced) + aaron, lottie + abi, abi + rick, abi + daryl scenes WITH a few side characters as well (tara, abraham, rosita)

Anyways,
Byee <3