❝ don't act like a saint, darth. you're far
from it. ❞

―

CARINA HAD HER JAW TIGHTLY clenched as the trio treaded out the cantina, her long brown locks framed her face as she lifted the hood of her robe to hide her from other lurking eyes.

Obi-Wan could feel Carina's irritation as it practically radiated off of her. Luke would throw curious glances towards the woman, something about her felt familiar, so familiar that he felt as if he could trust her. It was an odd thought to have for someone you had supposedly just met.

Obi-Wan spared young Skywalker a look, "You'll have to sell your speeder."

Luke's expression faltered slightly as images of the corpses of the only family he ever knew plagued his mind once again. The boy swallowed thickly as anger coursed through him, "That's okay. I'm never coming back to this planet again."

Carina furrowed her brows as she turned her attention over to her only son that had a grim expression on. The mother tightly pursed her lips before peering over at Kenobi, only speaking with her eyes as she gave him a look.

Obi-Wan slightly shook his head in response and Carina narrowed her eyes, she was not fond of being kept in the dark. Carina's thoughts were cut short as 3-PO and R2 came into view.

The brunette's steps faltered as she took in the sight of the two droids, her chest tightening slightly as emotions swelled through her. She hadn't seen either of them in roughly twenty years.

They looked just as she remembered, making memories of the time when she served in the Republic flow through her mind. Almost every single one included Anakin, because R2 almost never left either of their sides.

Carina slipped her hands into her pocket as 3PO looked at her, "Is this our pilot?"

Luke looked at the droid before shaking his head, "No, this is the person R2 was supposedly looking for. She's coming along."

R2-D2 let out a beep and a small genuine smile spread across Carina's tainted lips, "It's a pleasure to meet the both of you."

3PO gave his version of a wave as R2 waddled in response.

Obi-Wan noticed Carina not taking her eyes off of the droids, he knew how much they meant to her, he also knew how much it had hurt to know that all memories they'd had together had been wiped.

The droids had no knowledge of who the woman before them was.

Carina raised her head slightly as she pushed away the nostalgia she was feeling, cautiously gazing around as she knew it would not be long until more troopers appeared.

"We better hurry."

―

Carina crossed her arms over her chest as the buyer placed the coins into Luke's grasp. The boy grabbed his robes before they continued down the crowded alleyway.

The brunette peered over at her son who began speaking, "He says it's the best he can do. Since the XP-38 came out, they're just not in demand."

"I'll cover anything we're missing." Carina reassured before Obi-Wan nodded, "It will be enough."

Carina let out a soft breath as she skimmed past incoming people, the Algora slightly looked back as a feeling of being followed occurred. The brunette pursed her lips when R2 and 3PO suddenly appeared behind the trio, following them as they treaded through the space port.

Carina knitted her brows together before throwing Kenobi a look, "I don't like this."

Luke slipped on his robe as they came upon docking bay ninety-four. Carina adjusted her utility belt as the wookiee from before, Chewbacca, stood by a rather old ship.

Carina's eyes landed on Han who was apparently fixing something from under the aircraft when she heard her son speak in an astonished tone, "What a piece of junk."

Han turned towards the group as his eyes settled on young Skywalker, "She'll make point five beyond the speed of light. She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid. I've added some special modifications myself."

Carina quirked up a curious brow, "That's not the least bit reassuring."

Han peered over at the mother, "She'll get us to Alderaan, sweetheart."

The Algora's eyes narrowed at the male, "Call me sweetheart again and I'll burn your tongue off."

Obi-Wan hid an amused smile as Chewie went up the ramp before disappearing into the ship. Han cleared his throat before gesturing towards the aircrafts entrance, "Right, well we're a little rushed, so if you'll hurry aboard we'll get out of here."

Carina followed after Obi-Wan and Luke as 3PO and R2 trailed after the brunette. The mothers eyes wandered around the ship as she took in it's appearance, a soft hum left her pursed lips when suddenly blaster shots could be heard in the near distance.

Carina's gaze went over to her son that had taken a seat where a gaming table was, the ship began to rumble as the engines ignited and Carina took a seat beside Obi-Wan as 3PO spoke, "Oh, my. I'd forgotten how much I hate space travel."

Carina strapped her seatbelt in when the commotion grew, lurching slightly to the side as she took notice that they were air born already.

The brunette turned her head before unclipping herself from the seat, she stood before making her way to the pilots cockpit with Luke and Obi-Wan following after her.

"Stay sharp. There are two more coming in, they're going to try to cut us off."

Carina narrowed her eyes at the control panel as she knew two Imperial Cruisers were gaining on them. Luke gave Han a look, "Why don't you outrun them? I thought you said this thing was fast."

Solo grit his teeth in irritation, "Watch your mouth, kid, or you're going to find yourself floating home. We'll be safe enough once we make the jump to hyperspace. Besides, I know a few maneuvers. We'll lose them."

"If you can't just hand the ship to me."

Han glanced back at Carina with an incredulous expression, "You?"

"I have much experience as a pilot, alright? Especially with enemies on your tail."

Han turned his attention back over to the control panels, "Whatever you say." The ship suddenly shuddered as an explosion flashed outside the window. A small smirk spread onto Solo's lips, "Here's where the fun begins."

Carina jolted back slightly upon hearing those words leave the mans mouth, for a moment she had heard it as Anakin. It was something her husband used to always say before they would almost plummet to their death.

Her heart pounded in her chest as she thought of old memories, memories that would always serve to send an aching feeling through herself.

Obi-Wan gazed at Han, "How long before you can make the jump to light speed?"

"It'll take a few moments to get the coordinates from the navicomputer."

The ship rumbled once more as Luke gaped at what the male had just said, "Are you kidding? At the rate they're gaining?"

Annoyance was visible in Solo's eyes as he addressed young Skywalker, "Traveling through hyperspace isn't like dusting crops, boy." Han looked back at his radar, "Without precise calculations we could fly right through a star or bounce too close to a supernova and that'd end your trip real quick, wouldn't it?"

Carina watched a red flashing light begin to go off, Luke gazed at it curiously, "What's that flashing?"

The brunette spoke before Han got the chance to, "We're losing the deflector shield."

Solo glanced at the woman before shifting his attention back to the panels, "Go strap yourselves in, I'm going to make the jump to light speed."

Carina backed out of the room as she entered the area R2-D2 and 3PO were in. The mother slipped back into her seat as Luke and Obi-Wan were already strapped in.

Carina slightly jolted back as they jumped through hyperspace. The woman let a small breath escape her lips as Obi-Wan stood from his seat. The Algora quirked up a brow, "Now would anyone enlighten me as to what is going on and why I was brought onto this mission with hardly a clue as to what is going to happen?"

Before Kenobi could speak Luke happily began chirping, "A girl said she needed you and Ben to return R2 to Alderaan and Ben here told me some information about my parents and how they were once Jedi Knights and now he's going to train me to use the force, that's basically why I'm here."

Carina immediately clenched her fists tightly as she slowly turned her attention over to Obi-Wan who merely blinked in response.

Carina forced a swallow as she let out a heavy breath, "You offered to teach this teenager, who has absolute no clue of anything, the ways of the force?"

Kenobi licked his lips before nodding, "The boy needs to learn how to defend himself."

Carina glared at her friend as she stood from her seat, feeling anger rise in her, "I don't think that's a decision for you to make, Obi-Wan." The mother looked back at her son, "What did he tell you about your parents?"

"Just that they were both great fighters that died." Luke reached into his utility belt as he held out his fathers old lightsaber, "He also gave me the weapon my father used to fight."

Carina felt her breath hitch in her throat as she gazed down at the saber in Luke's grasp, swallowing thickly as all memories of its previous owner flooded through her cursed mind. The lightsaber that once belonged to Anakin Skywalker, her husband.

All anger left her mind as she took a cautious step towards her child, "Can I see it?"

Luke blinked in confusion before handing the woman the weapon. Carina felt a shiver run up her spine as she held the saber's handle, she always remembered the day Anakin said that his life was not only devoted to the Jedi order— but to her.

Carina closed her eyes for a short moment before handing the weapon back to her son, "You're father was a great saber fighter."

Luke's eyes visibly brightened up, "You knew him?"

Carina slightly chewed on her lower lip as she hesitantly nodded, "We would sometimes partner up on missions, he was a good friend."

Obi-Wan stood slightly shocked to see Carina's drastic change in mood, as if she had completely forgotten about how the conversation had come up in the first place.

Luke intently gazed at the woman he had no clue was his mother, "Did you know my mother too?" Carina pursed her lips, chuckling softly, "Not very well, she always loved keeping to herself."

The blonde teen hummed softly, "Ben told me she was one of the best fighters known, I want to be like her."

Carina pushed her robes slightly back, a part of her didn't want her child to be like her, because perhaps he would make the same mistakes she did. That would be the last thing the brunette would ever wish upon her children.

Luke's eyes landed on the lightsaber attached to Carina's hip, the boy's lips parted before speaking, "You're a Jedi?"

Carina looked down at her saber before quickly shaking her head, "No, I am not."

Luke tilted his head curiously, "I thought only Jedi carried those weapons?" Carina grit her teeth lightly, "I once was a Jedi, I do not go by that title anymore."

"Why? Why would you stop being a Jedi?"

"A lot happened in my time, Luke. Things happened because of me and I'm not proud of it, the way of the Jedi, it's not one I believe in."

Kenobi shifted his gaze towards the floor as he closed his eyes, a part of him knew Carina would never call herself a Jedi ever again.

The old man inhaled sharply as a surge of screams and terror surged through his mind, Kenobi slowly took a seat as his chest heaved heavily.

Carina snapped her attention over to Obi-Wan as she knitted her brows together in concern, "What's wrong?"

Kenobi blinked as he comprehended what had just occurred, "I felt a great disturbance in the Force— as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened."

Carina pursed her lips in worry as her friend rubbed his forehead before fixing his gaze. Kenobi looked over at young Luke, "You'd better get on with your exercises."

Carina narrowed his eyes at him, "Obi-Wan."

"The boy must learn to protect himself, he cannot always rely on others to save him. You know this, Carina."

The mother stared at her friend, knowing the truth to his words as she would not always be there to help him. Yet Luke training in the ways of the force would alert the Empire of his existence, making him a very prominent target.

Obi-Wan smiled softly, "It's time to let go."

Carina closed her eyes, she was projecting her fears onto her children, she'd been doing it ever since they were born. The mother had done all she could to keep them far far away from all the wars, but it had been proven to inevitable, she had to let her children choose their own path now.

Carina backed away before taking a seat as Luke twirled the blue lit saber in his hand.

Han had already begun speaking before even entering the room, "Well, you can forget your troubles with those Imperial slugs. I told you I'd outrun 'em."

Luke dodged the small shot coming from the small droid as he used it as practice. Carina intently watched her child as Han huffed, "Don't everyone thank me at once. Anyway, we should be at Alderaan about o-two-hundred hours."

Carina glanced back to see Chewie and R2 engrossed in a game of holographic chess, "Now be careful R2."

The brunette watched curiously as the R2 unit made his move, watching as his piece moved across the board before taking out one of Chewie's pieces. The Wookiee let out a groan as he argued.

3PO gave the creature a look, "He made a fair move. Screaming about it won't help you."

Chewbacca let out annoyed noises as Han chimed up, "Let him have it. It's not wise to upset a Wookiee."

"But sir, nobody worries about upsetting a droid."

Han grinned at the gold robot, "That's 'cause droids don't pull people's arms out of their socket when they lose. Wookiees are known to do that."

C-3PO stood still for a moment before glancing down at his friend, "I see your point, sir. I suggest a new strategy, R2. Let the Wookiee win."

Carina chuckled softly in amusement before turning her attention back to her son who still held the saber before him as the small training droid. The brunette watched the teen track it's movements, leaning back in her seat as she did so.

Obi-Wan gazed at Luke, "Remember, a Jedi can feel the Force flowing through him."

The blonde Skywalker didn't take his eyes off of the robot before questioning, "You mean it controls your actions?"

Carina hummed, "Partially."

"But it also obeys your commands."

Luke kept his eyes on the droid when it suddenly fired, stinging the boy in the leg as Han let out a good laugh, "Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid."

Carina turned towards the male, "A lightsaber does more damage in a fight and unlike a blaster it can also defend. If a shot is coming right at you what is a blaster gonna do?"

Han gazed intently at the woman as he stayed silent before looking over at Luke who spoke up, "You don't believe in the Force, do you?"

"Kid, I've flown from one side of this galaxy to the other. I've seen a lot of strange stuff, but I've never seen anything to make me believe there's one all-powerful force controlling everything. There's no mystical energy field that controls my destiny."

Carina took notice of Obi-Wan smiling to himself as the smuggler continued, "It's all a lot of simple tricks and nonsense."

Kenobi stood from his place before taking ahold of a helmet to put it on Luke's head, covering his eyes, "I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct."

Luke let out a laugh as he couldn't see a thing before him, "With the blast shield down, I can't even see. How am I supposed to fight?"

"Sometimes to fight you don't need to see, you just need to feel." Carina explained, the words came out of her easily, even though the mother had not planned on saying anything at all.

Obi-Wan smiled at the brunette before tossing the seeker droid back into the air, Luke ignited the saber once again and hissed as another shot hit him.

Carina shook her head, "You're too tense, Luke."

"Stretch out with your feelings."

Luke let out a heavy breath before shuffling on his feet, he raised the weapon once more before him. The boy drowned out all sounds around him as he focused on his breathing.

Carina watched as her child deflected a shot right at him before quickly dodging two more in a row. The brunette smiled softly as Kenobi nodded, "You see, you can do it."

Han rolled his eyes, "I call it luck."

Luke smiled as he took off the helmet before shutting off the saber as Kenobi spoke to Solo, "In my experience, there's no such thing as luck."

"Look, going good against remotes is one thing. Going good against the living? That's something else."

Carina crossed her arms over her chest, "It's not much different once you learn to follow your instincts."

The control panel began beeping and Han glanced over at it, "Looks like we're coming up on Alderaan." The male and Wookiee headed back into the cockpit as Luke shifted his attention between Carina and Obi-Wan, "You know, I did feel something. I could almost see the remote."

Carina lowered her head slightly as Kenobi chirped, "That's good. You have taken your first step into a larger world."

That larger world did not treat those with a kind heart lightly, learning how to fight was not the only thing Luke would have to learn.

Learning how to fight was the easy part.

―

AUTHORS NOTE,
i think updates will be once a week from now on MAYBE twice im not sure bc school is literally drowning me in work but i will do my best to write during my free time, hope you guys liked this chapter xx