❝ it's all my fault ❞

―

CARINA STEERED THE NABOO STARSHIP down onto the wide area of sand. Unbuckling her seatbelt as Anakin walked out of the pilots room before the two gave Padme a look.

Senator Amidala stood from her seat as the trio exited the space craft, "Look after the ship, R2." Carina kindly spoke to the droid who beeped a response. The group started down the trail towards the homestead as the wind breezed past them.

Carina slightly tilted her head as her eyes landed on a rather familiar droid standing outside the home. The robot looked up at the group of three, "Oh, hello. How might I be of service?"

Anakin's brows furrowed as he spoke, "3PO?" The droid looked visibly taken back at the sight of the young padawan, "Oh, my... Oh, my maker. Master Anakin! I knew you would return, I knew you would." The droid turned towards Padme and Carina, "Miss Carina and Padme, oh it is so good to see you all again."

Carina gave the droid a small smile, "Hello, C-3PO."

Anakin pursed his lips, "I've come to see my mother." The robot's movements faltered slightly, darting it's attention between the three before gesturing to the house, "I think... I think... Perhaps we'd better go indoors."

C-3PO lead them into the courtyard where a man and women stepped into sight as the droid spoke, "Master Cliegg, Master Lars. Might I present three important visitors?"

Anakin glanced between the couple, "I'm Anakin Skywalker." The man gave the boy a look before introducing himself, "Owen Lars. This is my girlfriend, Beru." The woman at his side kindly smiled, "Hello."

"I'm Padme."

Carina tilted her head down slightly, "Carina Algora."

Owen gazed at Anakin intently, "I guess I'm your stepbrother. I had a feeling you might show up some day."

"Is my mother here?"

"No, she's not."

Carina turned to see an elder man enter the room on a levitating chair, one of his legs heavily bandaged and the other missing, he extends a hand out towards the padawan, "Cliegg Lars. Shmi is my wife... Come on inside. We have a lot to talk about."

―

Carina had her face set in a stern expression as she listened intently to what Cliegg spoke, "It was just before dawn. They came out of nowhere. A hunting party of Tusken Raiders."

Beru set down a tray of cups at the center of the table as the man continued speaking, his full attention set on Anakin, "Your mother had gone out early, like she always did, to pick mushrooms that grow on the vaporators. From the tracks, she was about halfway home when they took her. Those Tuskens walk like men, but they're vicious, mindless monsters. Thirty of us went out after her. Four of us came back. I'd be with them, only... after I lost my leg I just couldn't ride any more... until I heal."

Carina felt her chest tighten upon seeing a weary glint flash through Anakin's eyes as Cliegg sighed out, "This isn't the way I wanted to meet you, son. This isn't how your mother and I planned it. I don't want to give up on her, but she's been gone a month. There's little hope she's lasted this long."

Anakin shot up from his seat and Carina was quick to follow in pursuit as Padme questioned, "Where are you going?"

"To find my mother."

Carina gave the young padawan a look, "Anakin, think rationally."

"Your mother's dead, son. Accept it."

The Jedi Knight sent the man an angered glare as the Skywalker boy spoke up, "I can feel her pain, and I will find her. I know she's alive."

"Take my speeder bike." Owen offered up and as those words left his mouth, Anakin was already walking back outside.

Carina pulled her robes closer to her as she hurriedly stormed after the boy. The Jedi came to a halt upon seeing the padawan stare out into the desert as the bike was parked before him.

Carina approached the blonde boy, "Anakin."

"Stay here, watch over the Senator." the padawan's voice sounded distant, cold, as if it wasn't even himself speaking.

Carina pursed her lips in worry, "Ani." the boy gazed at her as the brunette thought for a moment, "Don't do anything I wouldn't."

A small smile caressed the boys lips as he turned to leave but Carina's hand shot out instinctively, taking ahold of his sleeve. Anakin was caught off guard to see the Jedi Knight reaching out for him but cherished the small moment.

Carina swallowed thickly before pulling the padawan into a tight hug, affection had never been her thing since she was not accustomed to receiving it but with Anakin it felt right.

Anakin held the girl by her waist as she softly spoke, "I have a bad feeling." The young padawan pulled back as he gazed longingly into her chestnut eyes, "I won't be long."

Carina hesitantly nodded in agreement as she stepped out of his reach, already missing his warmth as she watched him swing onto the speeder, firing up the engine before taking off.

Carina inhaled sharply, everything in her mind was screaming something would go wrong. She could feel it, yet she knew there was absolutely nothing she could do.

―

Carina stared up at the ceiling of the room she was currently staying in, the Jedi Knight let out a huff as she sat up, running her hands through her hair in frustration. She stood up from the bed, brows knitted together as she walked out into the courtyard, shivering slightly as wind blew.

Carina gazed up at the star lit sky, breathing softly as she attempted to keep her mind off of Anakin. The brunette turned towards the garage, walking inside as C-3PO stood in the room.

"Hello, Miss Carina."

The Jedi smiled at the droid, "Hello, 3PO." The robot turned its body to gaze at her, "You can't sleep?"

Carina pursed her lips tightly together as she shook her head, "Too many thoughts plague my mind."

"Jedi duties?"

The Algora girl let out a heavy sigh, "I wish. It's Anakin, I'm worried about him. Why? I'm not very sure, but I can feel it."

C-3PO shuffled closer towards the brunette, "Your feelings for him?"

Carina blinked in surprise as she gazed at the robot, "What?" The droid tilted its head, "Is that not what you were speaking about?"

Carina cleared her throat, "No, no, that's not what I was implying— how do you... um."

"Know? I see the small glances you give Master Ani, as well as the way your pupils dilate. Supposedly that is a sign that you are in l—"

"Okay! Thank you for that, C-3PO."

"Oh, you seem to be in denial."

Carina gave the droid a look, "I am not in denial, I think." the Jedi let out a groan as she clasped her hands together, "I don't know. When it comes to Anakin I'm afraid I know nothing. I care about him, so much. Yet, I know I cannot indulge in anything with him. That is what hurts."

"Emotions are usually ones greatest fault."

Carina rubbed her eyes before fixing her posture, "I am thinking too much into this. That is what Master Windu would tell me. I need to clear my head."

The brunette walked back out into the courtyard as a distant voice caught her attention. Carina spun on her heel, eyes narrowed as she took in her surroundings.

"Anakin, no! Don't!"

The Jedi Knight felt her breath catch in her throat as she recognized the voice as her old Master, Qui-Gon Jin.

Carina swallowed thickly before focusing, feeling herself become overwhelmed as her body tensed up, muscles seizing as she furrowed her brows together. Death. So much death.

Carina clutched her head as cries of pains hollered in her mind, she breathed heavily, eyes snapping open as she softly whispered out a name, "Anakin."

―

Carina paced around in front of the entrance of the garage where Anakin had locked himself in since he had returned with Shmi's lifeless body.

The Jedi Knight chewed her lower lip anxiously, thinking of ways to conjure up a conversation yet comfort him if needed. Carina was never one to know what to say in such extreme situations, comforting people wasn't something she was very skilled at, but she could try. For him.

Carina took a deep breath before stepping into the room as her eyes landed on Anakin, who was by the workbench, repairing a part of the speeder.

"Hey." the brunette's tone came out soft and gentle. Anakin pushed down a cry as he shakily spoke, "The shifter broke. Life seems so much simpler when you're fixing things. I'm good at fixing things... always was. But I couldn't—" the young padawan abruptly stopped what he was doing as he turned towards the Jedi, tears brimming his eyes as his voice wavered with untamed emotions, "Why did she have to die? Why couldn't I save her? I know I could have."

"Anakin, you—"

The young padawan let out a groan, fury was evident on his expression, "It's all Obi-Wan's fault. He's jealous. He knows I'm already more powerful than he is. He's holding me back."

Anakin hurled the wrench he had in his grasp across the room, breathing heavily as he gazed down at his trembling hands.

Carina's lips parted in worry and shock for the young boy, "Anakin, what did you do?" she knew he had retaliated against the people responsible for his mothers death, that's what the voices had been whispering to her.

It's what she heard Qui-Gon yelling, hoping to reach Anakin before he did something he would regret.

Anakin pursed his lips, tears welling up in his eyes, "I... I killed them. I killed them all. They're dead, every single one of them." the padawan focused his gaze on Carina, who held a weary expression.

"Not just the men, but the women and the children too. They're like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals... I hate them."

Carina eyed him, she was worried for the padawan. Such emotions consuming a person never did anyone any good, she hesitantly extended out her hand. Anakin looked at her, feeling sobs rack through him as he took her hand.

Carina pulled the padawan to him, holding him tightly as the boy cried. Anakin's lower lip trembled, "Why do I hate them? I didn't... I couldn't... I couldn't control myself. I... I don't want to hate them... But I just can't forgive them."

Carina caressed his hand as she softly spoke, "Anger is a powerful thing, it takes time to control it. We all have our lows but to remember that we must not let it consume us is what matters."

"To control your anger is to be a Jedi." Anakin held disappointment in his tone as Carina answered, "You're not expected to control it over night. I've had my anger blind me as well. Everything takes time."

Anakin shook his head, "No, I'm a Jedi. I know I'm better than this. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Carina let the boy cry in her arms, feeling for him. She remembered the out bursts in anger she had when Qui-Gon passed away.

So, Carina consoled young Skywalker. But the Jedi Knight should have known better.

—

AUTHORS NOTE, we're almost done with episode two 😻