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𝙎𝙄𝙓 𝘼𝙉𝘿 𝘼 𝙃𝘼𝙇𝙁 𝙈𝙊𝙉𝙏𝙃𝙎 𝘼𝙂𝙊

0345 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀
𝗦𝗔𝗡 𝗗𝗜𝗘𝗚𝗢, 𝗖𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗙𝗢𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗔

"Baby, Baby!" My wife said lowly as she shook me until I finally came back to a clear consciousness

"Fuck..." I groaned -knowing this was possibly her last straw and this was a conversation she was going to demand of me- as she turned the lights on becoming worried once more as she rushed back to my side

Ever since we visited Ross at the hospital two weeks ago the visions of everything about these tours seemed to be coming back to haunt me even though he was recovering phenomenally.

I couldn't watch tv without hearing screams. I couldn't sleep without seeing dead bodies. Hell, I couldn't even fucking think sometimes without hearing gunshots and grenades.

"Are you okay?!" Dinah asked in a concerned tone

"Yes" I lied as she sighed

"I'm worried about you, baby, you've been doing this for a week straight and every night it seems to be getting worse." She then said causing me to sharply exhale as I rubbed my eyes

"Dinah I'm fin-" I began to state before she cut me off and said, "No, you're not! It started with you having cold sweats and shaking lightly in your sleep, then you crying, screaming, and talking in your sleep!"

"Dinah, can you please just drop it? My head is killing me and this is making it worse." I asked causing her to sigh and just stare at me

"Will you just please for the sake of me and your children please look into some sort of therapy?" She plead with watery eyes as she grabbed for my hand which I slightly snatched away as I got up from bed

"I'm not crazy, Dinah. You already know I don't fucking like those places so I don't know why you keep fucking bringing this shit up to me" I rebutted as I slid on my sweatpants and silent tears fell from her eyes

"You need help and you're really starting to scare me..." She said lowly

"How the fuck am I scaring you, Dinah? Please, elaborate and enlighten me!" I snapped now angry at what she was claiming

"You're scaring me because the man I married and sleep next to is becoming unhinged! You have two babies on the way and your pride won't seem to allow you to thoroughly check on your mental health!" She rebutted beginning to wipe her eyes

"That is such bullshit! You know I'd never do anything to hurt you or them! So if you're having some type of strange pregnancy hormone that is making you want to sleep alone just say that and I'll sleep in a guest room." I said slightly louder

"What do you mean?! I'm not saying that, I'm just saying I'm scared of what you may become if you don't try and get some help. It's getting worse and I don't think I will be enough to help you this time! I would drown to hold you down and you know that, but right now it doesn't feel like it's the same on each end." She replied as more tears fell from her eyes

"Dinah, just drop it. I am fine. Just go back to sleep, I'm sorry I woke you up" I replied beginning to walk out of our room

"Where are you going!!?" She then asked causing me to groan now annoyed

"I'm going to get a drink, baby, is that fine by you?" I asked sarcastically

I was watching her heart break in front of me from her expression only and though I felt terrible at the moment for making her feel that way something in me wouldn't allow me to be vulnerable, apologize and tell her she was right and how much I need and love her.

Dinah then just laid back down and continued to cry once I was out the door and headed down the stairs.

"Shit!" I sighed knowing she didn't deserve that

I just needed a drink and I'd be fine. I just needed her to know that.

𝙁𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙔𝙀𝘼𝙍𝙎 𝘼𝙂𝙊

I smiled as I tickled Dinah's stomach causing her to laugh pushing me away as we laid in each other's arms bare and happy with the sounds of the waves crashing outside.

"You make me so happy," She said with a big smile as she slid on top of me and pinned my arms down before pressing her lips against mine as I smiled

"And I'm going to make you happier and happier and happier" I replied as she pulled away still smiling

"Does that mean I get more cooking, sex, and kisses?" She asked knowingly causing me to gently flip us and hover over her beginning to kiss her more passionately

"You can get whatever you want whenever you want" I promised as I began to kiss her neck and body once more

𝙉𝙊𝙒

I had been staring at the computer screen for 15 minutes looking at numbers to therapy centers around the city with my whisky in hand.

I had two voices in my head, one saying this wasn't needed and one saying it was and the one saying I didn't was stomping my thoughts.

Finally, I sighed before deleting the tab and deleting the history of my search before turning the computer off as well as the lights heading back upstairs after downing the rest of my drink and setting the glass in the sink.

Maybe if I get back into the world and go back to work I'll be fine; it's near that time for me to go back anyways.

When I finally made my way to me and my wife's bedroom I immediately noticed she was now asleep with dried tears staining her cheeks.

"I'm sorry..." I whispered feeling guilt consume me as I ran my hands through my hair as I went into the bathroom, wetting a piece of tissue before coming back and gently wiping her cheeks and throwing it away.

I then turned the lights out and slipped into bed behind her, wrapping my arm around her before kissing her forehead.

"I love you" I then said

I had the perfect woman but I'm starting to think I am too much of a fuck-up for her from the get.

I needed help and didn't know how to accept that fact.

A/N: Oof. 🙁 How are you all feeling?! Colton is starting to really struggle as Dinah just reaches her second month of pregnancy. Do you guys believe he'll get better? What about their little disagreement? Remember to vote, comment, share, and add to your library!! Love yaaa🖤🖤🖤