❝Weak men make everybody vulnerable to danger.❞

JOHN MACARTHUR

✩

3.7 : adoptions 

OR

season 5, episode 5 : cradle to grave

IT'S BEEN A MONTH SINCE NICK'S DEATH. There was a funeral, but neither Fin nor Lars attended. It would be too dangerous. Instead, Fin and Spencer drove Lars to the airport. Munich, Lars said. She has an American friend there, an exchange student, and the family's willing to take her in, too. It's far out of Esther's way, and too much work. Fin calls a few of her CIA contacts from the Academy, asks them to track the names Esther Hayward, Esther Cameron, and Tess Finley, all names Fin can think that Esther would use. They'll find out who Esther's truly after.

Fin's moved most of her things to Spencer's apartment, but she's left her car there at her apartment complex in an attempt to throw Esther off the trail. Spencer doesn't drive them to work, either; instead, he drives them to a bus station, where they take the bus to the Metro station, and then split up, taking separate trains to the station closest to the BAU, and then reuniting for a final bus trip to the office. Spencer devised this clever plan several weeks ago, just after Nick's funeral, in the hopes that Esther won't be able to follow either one of them very closely. And so far, it's worked.

Hotch is back with the team after several weeks of recovery from his injuries, but something's off. Erin Strauss, who Fin's only met briefly maybe once, has apparently been jumping down his throat every chance she gets, which means Hotch is in a worse-than-usual mood almost constantly.

But today, Fin hopes, is a better day. They've been called in early because JJ has a new case for them, but that's normal. What Fin's hoping for is that there's no extra drama going on outside the case.

This particular morning, Fin's perched on Spencer's desk, sipping her coffee and waiting for JJ to be ready to present the case, when Morgan walks in, staring at his cell phone, which is beeping non-stop. "Reid, what did I miss?" he asks, looking up at the two of them.

"Good morning to you too, Derek," Fin says, grinning.

"Oh, man, you're not gonna believe this." Spencer leans back in his chair, eyebrows raised. He's letting his hair grow out longer, and Fin's a big fan. It almost touches his shoulders now, and she makes a point to tell him every chance she gets that she finds it extremely hot. (He always blushes furiously.) "Some moron just posted a blog called 'What Would Carl Sagan Do?'"

"No, Reid, the case," Morgan mutters, looking back down at his phone. "What's the case?"

"What are you talking about?" Spencer frowns.

"These emails from Hotch. 'Take a look at this', 'new case to review'."

"Emails from Hotch?" Spencer looks back at his computer screen, still frowning. "I didn't get any emails from Hotch, did I?" He clicks the mail icon, scrolls for a bit, then shakes his head. "Nothing."

"Neither did I," Fin adds over the top of her coffee. "I checked this morning."

Morgan pauses for a moment, then drops his go-bag on Spencer's desk and marches up to Hotch's office. Fin winces. "I hope this goes better than I think it's gonna go."

But before either of them have a chance to process this, JJ waves at them from the conference room. "Ready, guys."

Fin hops off of Spencer's desk, hands him his crutches, and makes sure he gets up the stairs alright before heading into the conference room with the others.

"Kristie Taylor," JJ says, once everyone's sitting down. Fin can't believe how amazing she looks with bangs and choppy layers. "Runaway, drug addict. Reported missing from Farmington, New Mexico three years ago. Yesterday she turned up off a freeway outside of Rio Rancho."

"Sexual assault combined with ligature marks on her wrists and ankles," Spencer says, looking down at his file. "She was asphyxiated."

JJ clicks a button on her remote and brings up more photos on the screen. "Three victims in five years. All the women are connected by marks. He likes chains."

"Of course he does." Fin rolls her eyes. Honestly, could men get any more disgusting?

"Definite sexual sadist." Emily nods, giving Fin an I-know look. "He sticks to his type: sixteen- to nineteen-year-old girls. All blond."

"Hangs on to them for a while, too," Spencer adds, quickly scanning the file in front of him. "Look at this. Average of two years between abducting them and killing them."

"Low body count, long time frame." Morgan shakes his head. "This guy's in control of his urges."

"Do you think this guy feels some kind of connection to the girls he abducts?" Fin asks, looking around at the rest of the team.

"He's too controlled, though." Rossi leans back in his chair, staring at the screen thoughtfully. "Sadists need new victims, new ways to torture. There are a lot of guys out there who like chains. Are we sure this is the same unsub?"

"Kristie Taylor's autopsy report also indicates a second connection between these victims," JJ says grimly.

Fin's the first to find it in the file, beating even Spencer. "She was...pregnant?"

"She'd given birth." JJ nods at her. "Very shortly after, the unsub killed her."

"How soon after?" asks Morgan solemnly.

"Minutes," JJ replies quietly.

Oh, my god. Fin covers her mouth with her hand, gasping softly. Beneath the table and out of sight, Spencer places his hand on her knee and squeezes gently. It's warm, comforting.

"This unsub isn't your typical sexual sadist," Hotch says, from behind Rossi, where he's standing. Captivity and assault, we've seen before. What we haven't seen before is this signature–the role he forces these women–"

"Girls, Hotch," Fin corrects him. "They were still teenagers."

"These girls to fulfill before he kills them: motherhood." Hotch pauses for a moment–probably for dramatic effect–and then nods. "Wheels up in thirty."

✩

JJ goes to the local field office to set up, and Morgan, Hotch, and Rossi are talking with the M.E., so that leaves Emily, Spencer, and Fin to visit the latest dump site.

Emily ducks under the yellow caution tape walling off the site, and Spencer leans against one of the SUVs (well, he's kind of leaning against Fin), examining a map of the area laid across the hood and looking extremely sexy in his purple shirt rolled up to his elbows, gray vest, and sunglasses slid low on the bridge of his nose.

"There's no tire tracks," Emily calls over to them. "The body wasn't dumped that far from the road. This guy doesn't care about them, not enough to even hide them very well."

"That's why this doesn't make any sense." Spencer's staring down at the map, frowning and scrunching up his nose. "Dump sites reveal something about the unsub, you know, at the very least, a geographic familiarity, a place he knows he won't get caught."

Emily ducks under the caution tape again and walks over to join them, pushing her own blouse sleeves up. It's surprisingly warm out, with the sun beating down on them, and Fin kind of regrets her choice to wear a sweater, but then the wind kicks up and she doesn't feel bad about it at all.

"So he has to know this road, right?" Fin asks, looking up at Spencer from practically under his arm.

"Yeah, except he abducted Kristie in Farmington–" Spencer places a finger on the map, over Farmington– "and then dumps her here–" He moves his finger across the map and lands on another dot– "in Rio Rancho. It's a 175-mile drive."

"Why drive that far just to dump a body by the side of the road?" Emily asks, frowning.

"A forensic countermeasure?" Spencer suggests.

"Yeah, maybe covering his tracks with distance, making it hard to narrow down his comfort zone." Fin nods, thinking hard.

"So the geographical profile won't do us much good." Emily sighs.

"No, it will, just not with the victims," Spencer says, and Fin can practically see the wheels turning in his head, processing all of this. "We profiled that it's the babies that he's interested in. That's where he'll reveal himself."

Emily nods slowly. "The adoption company he sells through and whatever network of resources he uses."

"He makes shortcuts there for convenience." Spencer's talking faster, thinking harder. "No one's gonna drive a hundred miles for diapers or for a public notary for legal paperwork."

"If the babies are in the system, Garcia can use them to find him," Fin finishes for him, nodding.

So they hop in the SUV and Emily drives them back to the police station (Spencer can technically still drive, since he hurt his left leg, but it still kind of scares Fin), where they call Penelope and ask her to match the DNA Morgan's gotten from the ME to children in the adoption system. She calls back a few hours later, when Spencer, JJ, Rossi, and Fin are sitting around the table in the station, with some semblance of news.

"Know this: most adoption folk are like the nicest, most dedicated people in the world. There are, however, one or two skeezy ones."

Spencer, who's leaning on his hand, pressing his fist against his mouth, and looking like an incredibly attractive philosopher, frowns. "How skeezy?"

"Super skeezy," Penelope replies. "I've got a spreadsheet from one of them expecting compensation for the baby I'm having."

"Something you wanna tell me, Garcia?" Morgan asks, walking over from the coffee machine with files tucked under his arm.

"Oh, that's the sad part, my prince," Penelope coos. "The genetically perfect offspring of Penelope Garcia and Derek Morgan wouldn't fetch top dollar."

"Who does?" asks JJ, her bored expression looking exactly how Fin's feeling inside. Emily and Hotch have now joined Morgan, standing around the table.

"White babies are in higher demand than minorities. Boys are more popular than girls, at least this year, anyway. And then there's the Swedish supermodel rule."

"The what?" Emily frowns, confused.

"Blond hair, blue eyes," Fin says before Penelope can.

"Exactly right, my dear. If I were to deliver a baby the likes of Victoria Silvstedt, I'd be set for life. I would."

"Garcia, did the baby's DNA turn up in New Mexico's adoption records?" Hotch asks.

"No. There's no hits on her profile. And it is a her, by the way."

A four-year-old baby girl, somewhere in the world, not knowing where she came from... Fin feels slightly nauseous thinking about it.

"This unsub could still be selling babies, just not through the system," Rossi suggests, and Fin wishes he wouldn't.

"That's gonna make him a lot harder to catch," Spencer replies, his eyebrows knit together worriedly.

"All right. It's late." Hotch sighs resignedly. "Let's get some rest. We'll hit this fresh in the morning."

"Garcia out!" And Penelope hangs up.

Fin leaps to her feet and holds Spencer's crutches for him, helping him stand up and get the crutches under his arms. He smiles at her gratefully, a smile only for her. It makes her feel warm inside.

As they head toward the doors, Fin hears Hotch say, "Morgan, I'd like for you to write up a preliminary profile," and she doesn't hear anything else. It's strange; he's never asked any of the rest of them to write preliminary profiles. But she's too tired and too busy to focus on that right now.

Spencer, despite Fin's insistence, drives them to the hotel, and in front of the others, Fin heads into her own hotel room, wishing JJ, Morgan, and Emily good night. She brushes her teeth, changes into a pair of sweats and an old t-shirt, and waits a few minutes for Spencer's signal.

As soon as she hears the little knock against the wall that means he's ready, she very quietly sneaks out into the hall, knocks twice on his door, and he lets her inside. Now that they've gotten so used to sleeping next to each other, it's hard for Fin to sleep apart from him, and even harder after what happened to Nick. Being on a case like this, it gets even worse, the intrusive thoughts and the bad dreams.

So they sneak around a lot to avoid telling the team (with Strauss driving Hotch into the ground, Fin figures it's probably not a good idea to announce their relationship just yet) and both of them are comfortable with it.

Even though they've never actually slept together (Spencer, in his sweet, shy way, has brought it up a few times, and Fin's very gently told him that she's not quite ready, and he respects that), there's something comforting about falling asleep to the sound of his breathing, feeling his skin against hers, the way he kisses her just before bed and tells her good night.

It makes her feel safe.

~

i'm back!! so, so sorry for leaving y'all hanging for so long, but i was in the process of moving states and that took absolutely forever. also a new job and new school assignments make time to write very, very scarce.

but i promise semi-regular updates from here on out! there should only be about twelve to thirteen more chapters left in amg!! that's pretty crazy o.O thank you all so much for sticking with me throughout this insane journey. <3 i love you all so much