Review: Only You
Book Name: Only You

Author: @-krishvpuffs_

Reviewer: @ceyshells

Cover: 3/5

Well-made. Depicts the main characters with a readable font for the title. Background does not include any tie in to the story other than "love", but it still tells enough. My only question is why a second lead character is included on the cover. Having too many characters makes it look cluttered, and I believe the main focus should be on the two main characters.

Title: 3/5

Short and simple. I do wish it could have a bit more depth, though.

Synopsis: 3/10

The entire synopsis is written in one bulk paragraph, which makes it look daunting for readers. Additionally, the grammar could be vastly improved. The last two sentences are well written, but the others have some grammar issues.

Eg: Besides having two different age groups, different worlds and different lives,

Edit: Despite being two different age groups, living different lives in different worlds,

Eg: A highschooling girl and a man in his late 30s fall for each other.

Edit: a highschool girl and a man in his late 30s fall for each other.

Additional Notes: Why is there a capital letter in the middle of the sentence? It's not the start of a dialogue. Splitting one sentence into two lines is not ideal, but if you want to do that, I would add an ellipsis at the end of the word "worlds" and a paragraph spacing in between.

Eg: Things were going smooth until their paths meet the paths of two more persons.

Edit: Things were going smoothly until their paths met the paths of two others.

Eg: So who will win whom?

Edit: So, who will win whom?

Do take note of the grammar and punctuation mistakes that I corrected, it will help you to improve the story itself.

Execution: 5/10

A simple to understand romantic plot, which is good. Writing style was not the most professional and the grammar could use some work. Spicing up the story with better vocabulary words can also prevent the storyline from growing stale.

Plot: 9/20

A classic age gap romance plot featuring the standard coincidence first time meeting up to the numerous times in the future which are no longer coincidence. While I think having many characters is good, I also believe it sometimes can sidetrack readers from the main characters or end up giving the side character a better backstory than the protagonist. For example, there was one chapter in between that suddenly featured the bully Suhyeon and her abusive father and upbringing. I understand that this could be important to the story and allow us to see the character in a new light, although it still doesn't condone her actions, but it felt like a filler and seemed a bit redundant. I also feel that the relationship between Ireul and Namjoon progresses too quickly, because she essentially "confesses" to him in the tenth chapter, which he reciprocates. They have barely had any chances to meet and talk, let alone get to know each other well enough, and they're already smitten with each other.

Writing Style: 11/20

The formatting of the story itself is similar to the synopsis, where the paragraphs are spaced randomly. Other than making it difficult to read, it also lacks uniformity, which makes the book look messy. Additionally, I'm not a fan of using emojis within the story, such as the little hearts that you used behind certain sentences. Sure, it looks cute and aesthetic, but it also loses the professionalism that your story originally portrayed. One more issue that I have, but is not necessarily wrong, is the use of romanized Korean words within the story. If you want to use those, I'd advice adding the meaning behind the word or at the end of the chapter since I noticed you did that on one instance with "sarang" or love. Consistency is also an important factor.

Grammar & Vocabulary: 8/20

The first issue I noticed was the use of multiple punctuation behind some sentences. I know you want to portray emotion, and with an excited person you'd want to add a few more exclamation points, but please refrain from doing this as it is not grammatically correct. Another issue to note would be the use of abbreviation within the story. I'm sure if your character were being acted out, they would say "by the way" instead of "btw". Abbreviation such as we're or you've is okay, but a more critical person would also have issues with that.

Other than the punctuation issues, I noticed a few capitalisation errors, in which a capital letter appears in the middle of the sentence, and some run-on sentences. I will give an example sentence that has both these errors.

Example: He was looking for a seat, Meanwhile, He sees a person who was constantly looking at the entrance gate as if he's waiting for someone.

Edited: While he was looking for a seat, he sees a person who was constantly looking at the entrance gate, as if he's waiting for someone.

While I think it is possible that you missed these mistakes, proofreading is very important and will help reduce the errors that appear in your writing.

The vocabulary used was not anything special, but there is no fault in that since it is something that builds up with usage.

Character Development: 3/10

Since this story is written in third person, there is not much elaboration on thoughts. Only feelings and expression are shown, and of course, emotional state is also seen through actions. Many characters are introduced throughout the story, but I will focus on the main characters: Ireul, Namjoon and Yeonjun.

Ireul shows emotions frequently, such as when she admits her clumsiness despite being wronged, or when she becomes flustered by her friend's remarks about Namjoon. However, we as readers don't get to know much about her inner feelings.

Namjoon is quick tempered and just as quick to stand up for injustice. He's also a little oblivious, as some characters tend to be in romance stories.

Yeonjun is a "minor" character, in all honesty. So in my opinion, having him on the cover makes it a little confusing. He is Ireul's classmate who appears to have a crush on her. Even lesser of his feelings and emotions are explained compared to the other two.

In terms of development via a romantic angle, the characters definitely do develop. Unfortunately, I did not see as much emotional development as a person would actually feel in the forming of a relationship.

Total: 45/100

Additional Comments: Hi @-krishvpuffs_ , thank you for applying in my review slots. I sincerely hope you will take my feedback into consideration and use it to improve your story. If you have any questions, feel free to DM me.