A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.
Proverbs 14:30

“Johanna!” I heard Pastor Fernando call out as the other members of the worship team gathered for the opening prayer. I made my way to his direction along with the others, and as I stood amongst them, a fair dark-haired woman entered the church and walked to where we were.

“Geneva!  So glad you made it, where’s your sister?” I heard Pastor Trina ask as she met the woman and gave her a hug. Hmm, so her name is Geneva. I smiled in appreciation at her sight, the sassy yet elegant clothes she had on made her look even more beautiful. I lowered my gaze. My, she could pass for being a model!

“Ugh… she having a terrible headache right now… says she can’t make It.” she replied with a rather annoyed tone.

“Oh. Alright, we’ll be praying for her… by the way, you’re just in time we’re about to begin practice.”

“Yeah… by the way, I was told we have a new member in the worship team?” I heard her ask as she joined the circle.

“Yes!” Pastor Fernando took my hand and led me to where she stood “—and in fact, she’ll be leading the worship tomorrow… her name is Johanna Dumay.” Her gaze ravaged me from head to toe, studying me with her piercing glance. I gazed down in discomfort. What was that all about?

“Oh? Great!" She finally spoke, "My name’s Geneva Sepnayen. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Pleasure’s mine…” I replied as I took her outstretched arm.

“So Sister Johanna, how long have you been a believer so far? I have been in this church for the last eighteen years of my life.” I was left speechless at her remark. What was I supposed to say to that? I've been a believer for less than a year!

“Well, I-uh--“

“She just got here a few months ago…” Our attention shifted as we saw Melchour coming out of the Minister’s office. “But who’s counting right? When one is saved, fully commits to God and God's transformation is seen then that’s all that matters, isn’t it?” He continued as he joined our circle with a smile. I felt tension charge the room as he spoke, and with this I kept my gaze lowered.

“O-of course, Pastor.” She stammered. I released a long breath, relieved that I didn't have to answer her question.

“Alright, everybody c’ mon now let’s pray.” Pastor Fernando opened the practice in prayer and everybody began to go to their places… I saw Geneva take hold of a microphone and make her way to the platform. Hmm, she must be one of the backups. I did my best to compose myself, but the very fact we'd be standing in the same platform somehoe made me squirm. Oh Lord, what is wrong with me?

“She just got here a few months ago…” The voice of Melchour echoed in the church as we saw him come out of the minister’s office. “But who’s counting right? When one is saved, fully commits to God and is reflected in the individual's life then that’s all that matters, isn’t it?” I was taken aback as I listened to him speak. Was this simply a pastor giving his comment or a man defending a person important to him?

“O-of course, Pastor.” I discreetly eyes him as he joined the circle, noting the unusual gleam in his eyes as he looked upon the woman. I felt a gush of discomfort surge my being. Who was she to him?

I know it was a culture for this church to let new ones who were willing to lead have a chance to try and be trained. Pastor Fernando always encouraged us that as we see a person that has a gift, we must get on to train them as long as they are willing. I can’t say I disagree with him… I think his principle is very good, but, exactly, how are we sure that this woman actually lives a life truly for God alone?

“Come on everyone! Copies of the songs are distributed, lets start, key Of E!” Pastor Ryan, the head overseer of the worship team called out. I felt a sting of aversion as I saw her get up into the platform. I’ve been here for more than eighteen years… but they’ve only let me lead worship in our outreach churches, never here. What could this woman have that made them let her? I know what I’m thinking doesn’t most likely please God right now… I know I need to surrender this quick. I’m not sure, however, if doing so will make me feel better about this…

As soon as we began to sing, it wasn’t very hard to notice how her voice stood out. Even without a mic I know it sounded beautiful. Her feet danced to beat of the song, the practice, even if it was a practice, felt like it was already the worship service. It looks like she got it covered; I just hope though, that what I think about how Melchour looked at her isn’t true. How would I be able to handle it if it was?

As the closing prayer went to an end everybody began to disperse and converse with one another. Praise God it went well. As I stood the view of Geneva making her way to Melchour’s location captured my attention. I know I really shouldn’t care, but the way she held on to him disturbed me. I began to wonder if she actually had feelings for him, or… does he have feelings for her?

I took a deep breath and began to fix my things. Well, she’s beautiful after all; I wouldn’t be shocked if they did have feelings for each other.

“Anna, are you going home already?”Without turning around I know it was Melchour speaking.

“Y-yeah… I should probably run off now. I need some sleep for tomorrow.” I know he’s going to offer walking me home, but I couldn’t possibly ask him that knowing Geneva is here.

“Bye!” I gave him a quick wave and quickly walked away. I don’t know why I feel heavy right now, but I think leaving here would help me ease myself a bit.

“Anna, wait!” I heard him shout, but I couldn’t turn around now, without looking straightly at him I managed to let out a few words. “Enjoy your night!”

“Hey Anna!” the voice of Jason startled me. My schoolmate and a fellow believer in this church seemed to have come out of the blue as I turned around.

“What are you doing here?”

“Well, I heard you guys practicing a while ago and decided to come to check how you guys were doing, I only live a few blocks away y’ know.” He replied with a smile. His smile was really cute, probably one of the reasons why a ton of women in school are head over heels for him. His deep eyes and high nose really is a head turner. Well, something quite common here in the highlands, we were a mix of foreign blood in here after all.

“Oh… right well the practice is already kind of over. I'm actually about to leave already, oh but if you want to have some fellowship with the others you could go inside.”

“Ah, well I was actually supposed to come here to see you but since you’re going home I could just walk you home, I guess.” His statement made me wonder. Why would he come to see me?

“Oh is that so? Why?” I asked as we began to walk.

“Well, uhm… alright. I think we should get out of the church grounds first. Actually, I do have something important to tell you.” As we made our way to the church exit I couldn’t help but notice how bright the moon shined. It reminded me of that night when Melchour first walked me home. Hmm, I guess those memories are better off shelved though. I know remembering them would only bring me false hopes.

“So… what is it you wanted to tell me?” I asked as I turned my attention to the man walking beside me.

“Uhm, well…” I could see his chest heave as he began to speak, which made me wonder even more for what he has to say.

“Yes?” He turned his gaze towards me and halted in his steps.

“Johanna… I actually do not know how to say this to you… I’ve had this for a long time already and… seeing you be a part of the same church as I gave the sign that maybe… I already should tell you the truth…”

“Truth?”

“Truth about… how I feel.” My eyes widened as I heard His statement. How he feels?

“What do you mean?”

“Johanna… I hope you don’t hate me for this, but… I’ve liked you since we were in first year. I couldn’t find the strength to actually tell you, but now… I feel that it’s the right time. I do hope… you give me a chance to prove it to you.” Silence filled our distance. For a moment I wasn’t able to process what had come out from his mouth.

“Well… I-uh-” Panic overwhelmed me as I scurry my mind for words to say. The wind blew more intensely as the awkwardness of the situation increased.

“Look, Jason… surely I wouldn’t hate you for that but uhm…”

“Johanna… I know you might not have an answer for me right now. All I’m asking is a chance… a chance to prove that I love you. Would you give me a chance?” Giving him a chance would have consequences. He may expect something from me, or it may give him false hope. My feelings for him aren’t even clear. I’ve known him as a schoolmate and recently a brother in church… how could I possibly give a sound answer for him?

“Uhm… Jason… thanks for telling me the truth of how you feel… but then, I think I need to pray about it first. I-I hope you understand…” I saw a smile form on his lips as I finish my words,

“Of Course Johanna… I understand.”

Watching Anna walk out the door with another man gave me a feeling of uneasiness. Why would she walk out on me like that? Could I have done something that offended her?

A feeling of worry crept down my spine as I thought of the idea of her walking with another man; I do hope she’ll be safe.

“Melchour, are you okay?” My thoughts began to alter as I felt warm hands tap my back.

“Yes, Geneva I’m alright…” I reassured and returned my gaze to the church door.

“Are you sure, you seem to have had something bad happen. It’s painted all over your face. Is it because of her?” I saw her expressions sadden as she inclined her gaze to the door as well.

“Well, I’ve never seen her act that way before… it’s just unusual. Don’t worry about me Sis I’m alright.”

“Hmm, whatever you say… c’ mon the coffee is prepared let's go get a sip before it gets cold.”

 “Thank you, Geneva.” I tried my best to shift my thoughts. I shouldn’t let this affect me seriously, I have a mission to go to tomorrow, and my heart needs to be prepared.

“That was wonderful Anna, you did great!” I turned around and met Pastor Marina’s embrace.

“Thank you… I do still have a lot to learn.” I replied as I held on to her hands.

“Aw, it’s alright… you did very well, glory to God,” she stated as she leaned over to my ear. “Though, you do have to befriend the microphone.” She chuckled. “You need to learn to be able to handle it… it greatly affects the sound of your voice y’ know.”

“Oh… yes, I’ll keep that in mind! Next practice I’d love to learn more tips from you if that’s okay.”

“Sure thing, my dear, sure thing. By the way, I need to get going now I have to pick up some things for our Church Anniversary next week.”

“Really, our church anniversary is next week?”

“Yes! Do be prepared… beginning tomorrow we have a lot of things to do. Keep in touch, okay?”

“Sure Pastor! I will be!” She waved to me goodbye and headed for the church’s exit. I couldn’t help but be excited about what she said. This week’s certainly going to be busy. Thank God school doesn’t start until next week or I’m going to have to skip working at the restaurant again.

“Great job Anna…” As soon as I turned around I saw Melchour smiling brightly at me. I was happy to see him, but I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to respond. The memory of the way he was with Geneva yesterday flashed in my mind.

“Oh, Glory to God,” I replied with my head lowered. “By the way… where’s Geneva, Manung?”

“Oh, her? She needed to leave before twelve noon today. She has a very demanding job.”

“Oh, what does she do?”

“Ah she's an english teacher, and she also does tutoring in the evenings that's why she's not able to come to practices and even services at tim..”

“I see,” I nodded in percipience as I heard him speak. So she is a teacher too. What a wonderful match.

“Uhm… by the way, I saw Jason with you last night as you were leaving, did you have plans with him?” I gazed towards him in wonder, his voice in an unusual tone. I lifted a brow as I thought. He never sounded like this to me before. Could there be a problem?

“Oh no… he just came by actually. Even I was shocked. Well, we just spoke about some stuff and then he left afterward.”

“Stuff?”

"Yeah, it's kinda-"

“Pastor Melchour!” A voice from behind us altered my thoughts. It was Pastor Ryan.

“Yes, Brother?” Pastor Ryan’s chest heaved heavily as he prepared to speak.

 “What is it Ryan, are you okay?” I asked as I put my arm upon his shoulder.

“I-it’s my wife… she had just been sent to the hospital. Nina says she fell off the stairs and hit her head.” The news startled me. No wonder Pastor Ryan’s Expressions had become so disturbed. “I’m really sorry Melchour… I wouldn’t be able to go with you today; I need to go see my wife.” The sadness in Pastor Ryan’s face was inexplicable. I can’t imagine the feelings he must be feeling right now.

“I understand, it’s alright. I’ll just take Pastor Marina with me.”

“Oh, uhm…” My gaze shifted to Anna as she began to speak. “Pastor Marina went off already. She said she’ll be picking some items for next week.” I saw her emotions sadden… it’s as if she too was worried about how this is going to work.

“I’m sure God will make a way Melchour, I’m sure he’ll send someone to accompany you. Right now, I really do have to go. I’m really sorry…”

Pastor Ryan began to walk away. I know he must be worried sick. I too, however, began to worry. The message and the worship were assigned to the main church and all the musicians in here have already left, even Pastor Ryan had to leave.

“Melchour, are you alright?” The sound of Anna’s voice altered my thinking. 

“Yes, I just, uh, didn’t expect how today had turned out. If Pastor Ryan isn’t around it would be a big problem for me. You know I don’t sing…”

“Well, can’t you inform the members of the church you’d be going to prepare to lead worship? I’m sure they have worship leaders in there…”

“I would… but phone signal doesn’t reach that place. Especially that it’s quite deep in the woods.” Her face was painted with worry as I gave my reply. “Johanna?”

“Hmm?” Her gaze shifted to me as she heard me speak. “Would you be willing to accompany me there?” there was a moment of silence. She lowered her gaze.

“I-uh...” her gaze returned to me with a smile on her lips… “Of course I would.” In an instant, I felt the worry leave my heart as I hear her response. But more than that, the way she placed her hands on mine as she replied gave me a feeling of peace. I couldn’t resist the urge I had to smile, for a long time; I haven’t had someone like her in my life. Assurance crept in my heart, could this possibly be the help what I had waited for?

The feeling of being able to assist Melchour gave me a sense of bliss; the thought of being able to glorify God again with my voice intensified that. I turned towards him as I spoke.

 “By the way though Melchour, how much time do we need to get there?”

 “Hmm, an hour and a half most likely. The church near to where we’ve gone to last Monday, it's just that the place we’re going to today has a longer walking distance if one was to ride in a public vehicle…”

 “Oh, and what time will the service be starting?”

 “5 pm…”

“Really, then aren’t we already late? It’s almost 3 pm.” My eyes shifted to my watch as I pondered on how we actually would be able to get there on time.

“Oh we’ll make it; we’d be using the motorcycle so don’t worry, Anna.” My eyes widened as soon as I heard what his words.

“Motorcycle?”

 “Yeah,” he replied briefly and began to walk to the pastoral house.

Is he serious? Oh my goodness…