Hello, cutie! I swear you're so kind for always dropping by and giving me support. I hope to be of the same to you. <3

Firstly before we get into the review, I would like to apologize for the delay in publishing this. I had finished writing your review two days back, I just had to proofread it once before I could post. That very proofread kept getting delayed because of other reasons. So, thank you for waiting patiently for the review. I truly appreciate it.

I hope I can be fair to your work and give you a satisfactory review.

So this is for you, love ❤️

Click

Goes the shutter

Trying to capture as much

Before the moment could drift away.

I scan the figure

Caught in the standstill

While sitting by my windowsill.

My eyes seem to be in a trance,

My mind playing tricks.

The voluptuous beauty

Glows under scrutiny.

Like a shadow

I hide behind the window

Creeping upon the oblivious maiden,

Who was being adulterated.

Unbeknownst to me

That destiny would seize one

And cease the other.

- Mia©2020
Inspired by Window by goldenmaknae5620

TITLE: 4.5/5

Honestly, when I first read your title, I didn't know what I was in for. I expected the story to go in one particular direction but it went in another. That's a good thing, to always give your readers an appropriate sense of misdirection. 

I think 'window' is one of the most beautiful symbolic words that can be used to portray much more depth and meaning. It serves exactly this purpose in your book. The story starts with Jungkook looking out the window to discover a woman who would continue to be the object of his desires. The story ends with him once again looking out from the very same window to witness the demise of the woman, her family in shambles and ultimately his life in crumbles. A window in a sense could be compared to the camera the Kook uses to capture certain moments of another person's life. Similarly, a window is a lens with a shutter that let Kook creep on Marilyn. 

BOOK COVER:  4.5/5

Honestly, I really like your cover. It's very appropriate and aesthetic. Now why would I claim such terms? Good question. Let's go over a few points.. 

Firstly, I'm a sucker for minimalistic templates, and your's poses as one. The text at every corner of the box gives ample information (including a small quote) and it still manages to look tidy. I like how you gave a 'censored' mention on the cover, so that people can proceed with caution due to the sensitivity of your work. Good job. 

The picture you have chosen is a good choice because it screams dark to an extent that there's possible serious tension in the story and at the same time the violet hue gives off a slightly dreamy haze. Perfect combo. I personally think the choosing the color violet was a great idea, because once again, violet symbolizes imagination, dreams and time, which are strong key elements which run as subtle undertones to the whole fic. Violet also means abstraction that serve as blurred lines within the story. The line blurred between morals, rights and actions of people. 

DESCRIPTION:  3/5

In a short fiction like yours and also the story-line, a short description would be highly effective, which you did use. But there is a scope of improvement. With your story-line, you could present a better narrative statement or an opener than the dialogue you've used. the dialogue comes off as too dry and also a little too direct. Lure and ease your reader near the rabbit hole before they can tip off and fall. 

PLOT:  6/15

Given the length of this fiction and it's story-line, I find it very balanced. There were no drags nor did it feel too less. 

What I'd mainly like to talk about is story in the first place. Your story rather than having a purely plot based narrative, centers more around the theme. The plot (which includes the rise in action, fall in action, climax and anti-climax) becomes a tool to serve this theme. 

There are some sensitive themes such as rape/non-consensual sex, certain depictions of violence or abuse present in your story. Using these themes are not wrong, but what poses a problem is the way these themes are earthed or portrayed throughout your story. I don't know whether intentionally or unintentionally, or maybe it was just simply the way your sentences were structured, it seemed as if you slightly glorifying these themes. I'd suggest, to avoid using real people as characters in a story such as that (especially as perpetrators) because it gives off the wrong impression about them, which can lead to unnecessary trouble. Like I said, it could've come off that way unintentionally and you were just trying to say that such heinous acts do not end well. Anyhow, just check that out once, after all these are just opinions of mine, it does not in any way overrule anything else. 

It's such a honest feat though how you could imbibe such emotions and make the reader move into your story with such tension and mystery of how the story is going to go down. I don't think I could've managed to pull that off! Well done.

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT:  7/15

Your characters went in with the flow of the story, which is a good thing. They followed through and developed in terms of action in your story, and also in the form of dialogues. Although, in a story such as yours, character's depth is a must, which I found to be lacking. The slight descriptions that you have added sound like fillers between different action scenes. Rather, give some background or explanations behind certain facts of the present or the past. Let their be a clear evolution of what has been and what will be. 

When there are sensitive topics or themes in the story, it becomes pivotal for the characters to have a running mind of their own that shows the whole thought-chain process. Through actions, yes, we understand the desperation of Kook, but what thoughts led him there? Sure, Marilyn trusts him as a good friend at the start, but how does that turn into fear? The way you can involve the reader more is to provide a more wholesome picture of the same.

WRITING AND GRAMMAR:  6/15

The story starts calmly, turns a little exciting and then you're in a wormhole that leads you straight into a whirlwind. This sets a good pace and read for your short fiction. 

When I read your story, I feel as though you have a lot to say but that's not being communicated as effectively. Your book doesn't lack clarity, it just the sentence structures and grammar you need to look into. That is not a worry, everyone of us, including me, sometimes make bad choices in sentence structuring (which I'm sure persists even in this review I'm writing). We can work on that which would help the reader to understand your characters better. 

Always, always deal with language carefully when you're writing about sensitive topics. Any slight miscommunication can set of fire. Just proof-read along those lines when you've incorporated the above, and that should do the trick!

ENDING:  4/10

I think this story does bring out a lot of emotions. It definitely not for the light-hearts. With that caution in mind, I think it could be a good story that delivers a strong message.

OTHER DETAILS: 

I think you'll also have to mention 'rape/non-consensual sex' and 'certain depictions of violence/abuse' in your description.

TOTAL SCORE:  35/70

Well done, Maha!

Good job.

I hope you're satisfied with my review. Any queries or objections, you can DM me.
Like I said, we can always agree to disagree as long as it's civil and constructive :3

Also, lemme guys know if you think I missed anything out, or if I need to add anything.