It wasn't until another hour later that Chishiya somehow managed to drag himself to his bed while I lay on my futon mat, once again struggling to breathe. However, the spray at least gave me some relief again. My hunger slowly began to gnaw at me, but I also noticed that my fever was gradually returning as the evening approached. According to the package insert for the penecillin, you should take it about an hour before meals. I had taken the first one earlier, which meant that I should eat something soon. Reluctantly, I got up and went to the bathroom to finally put on something sensible. So far, I hadn't managed to swap my robe for anything else.

When I came back, my eyes fell on Chishiya. He seemed to be fast asleep by now. A small smile slipped across my lips as I saw him wrapped tightly in his blanket, almost like a sleeping caterpillar. I tore myself away from the sight and then put the new supplies in the cupboard provided. I then took a rough overview of what we had there. Admittedly, I wasn't a particularly talented cook, but there were a few things I could do and since Chishiya wasn't able to cook anything at the moment, I was forced to take over.

Unfortunately, the lack of fresh vegetables and meat in Borderland was a problem. Of the food in the markets, meat, fruit and vegetables were the first to spoil when I came here and it was difficult to get something new unless you discovered a fruit plantation or could get an animal for food. Since I was neither a hunter nor an angler, meat or fish would be out of the question. However, I did find canned salmon in the store cupboard. That was a good start. I took a skeptical look in the small fridge and found an already opened tin of mango pieces, which gave me an idea.

I got all the ingredients ready and cooked some rice in the pot. Then I took the packet of nori leaves and made small maki rolls with the salmon. I then prepared a sweet version with the mango pieces. I took two plates and divided them equally. When I had finished, I turned on the kettle and poured myself a fresh cup of tea with the herbs Chishiya had collected. I looked over at his bed again and realized that he was now watching me. His complexion was still almost grayish and he still looked severely weakened.

"I hope you're hungry," I said as I put his plate on a tray. I also poured him a cup of the tea and then added two paracetamol. I took it and carried it to his bed. Chishiya straightened his upper body weakly and leaned back against his pillow. I placed the tray on his lap and pressed the sticks into his right hand. He just nodded and took them.

"Well, if you need help... let me know," I said a little sheepishly, putting my hand on the back of my neck.

"I don't need it. Don't worry."

"That's all right. I mean, just in case," I returned with a growl. "Enjoy your meal."

I went back to get my plate and sat down at the table. I silently sipped my tea, which I had mixed with a little honey and hoped it would ease my discomfort quickly. After all, I was very glad about the inhalation spray. It reassured me that I had something that could effectively help me get to grips with my breathing problems in an emergency. I tried some of the sushi I had made. It wasn't exactly a gourmet meal with the canned salmon, but it was okay. The mango maki were all the better for it. There was a tense silence between us during the meal.

"Thanks for the things you brought for me, by the way," I broke the silence after a while.

"Don't mention it," he simply replied.

When I had eaten, I got up and cleared away my empty dishes. Then I went back over to Chishiya's bed, who had also emptied his plate in the meantime.

"May I?" I asked, pointing to the tray while trying to keep enough distance from him so as not to infect him.

He just nodded and I took it back. Chishiya went back into a lying position shortly afterwards. Even though he tried as hard as he could to hide it from me, I could tell that he wasn't feeling very well. Hopefully the painkillers would help him to get through the night without too much pain. And I could also do with a bit of rest. I was still finding it incredibly difficult to breathe and the annoying chesty cough had hardly subsided since yesterday. By now it was evening and, judging by my physical exhaustion, I should treat myself to some restful sleep, just like Chishiya. To make this possible, I took another dose of the cough syrup before going to bed.
Meanwhile, Chishiya tossed and turned a little restlessly. I whispered a quiet "good night" to him, which he didn't notice as expected, and lay down on my futon mat. But my circling thoughts held me so tightly for quite some time that sleep would not come despite my tiredness. Every time I closed my eyes, I was overwhelmed by the images of the previous day. I saw all the blood again in my mind's eye and felt the rising panic that I had felt at that moment.
Even now, the fear still had me in its grip because I was aware that Chishiya had not yet survived all of this in one piece. Another thing that prevented me from sleeping was the recurring fever. I was alternately hot and cold, as if my body was fighting an internal battle against the pathogens inside me. And I probably wasn't even wrong. I rattled weakly and tried in vain to position my upper body a little higher to get more air.

"Damn, this place is worse than a military hospital," I suddenly heard Chishiya groan. I had obviously woken him up again with my coughing.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Take another pillow from the chest. Lying flat will constrict your airways unnecessarily."

"All right," I said gratefully as Chishiya switched on his nightlight to help me get there. As I tucked said pillow under my arm, I let my gaze wander to his bed. "How are you?"

Chishiya made brief eye contact with me.

"Fine," he replied curtly.

"On a scale of 1 to 10?" I added, because his answer was once again not too informative.

"5,55."

I raised my eyebrows skeptically.

"So 6?"

"No. 5.55. Exactly that."

I snorted snidely and then turned away from him again.

"Weirdo."

"I was serious."

"Are you sure it's not a 5.56 after all?" I asked belligerently.

"Absolutely."

I shook my head in amusement and lay down again, but this time I rested my head on two pillows.

"5.55 certainly sounds reasonable given the circumstances."

"Hm... what about you?" he asked.

His question surprised me.

"You mean... how am I?" I asked with a surprised undertone.

"Yes."

"So... maybe 5.04? Yes, I think that's about right."

"I see. Well, I'm sure the penecillin will take effect soon."

"I hope so. After all, we only have 10 days to get fit again."

"Don't think so much about it."

"I'll try," I sighed. Chishiya turned out the light again and I tried to get the sleep I needed, even though the fact that he had asked about my well-being kept me awake for a while.

The next morning I woke up with a dry throat again, but at least my fever was gone. What remained, however, was the harsh cough that was slowly driving me mad. I was already feeling remorseful because I was also depriving Chishiya of sleep. But when I got up, he was lying completely motionless in his bed. I almost panicked for a moment, but then I saw that he was breathing shallowly. His injured arm was stretched out far away from him, almost like a foreign object. His skin was still ashen and tiny beads of sweat were running down his cheek. I suspected that this was not a good sign. Alarmed, I went into the bathroom and looked for a washcloth. When I found one, I held it under ice-cold water. Pulling up a chair, I sat down next to his bed and briefly touched his forehead, which, as I had suspected, was glowing with heat. I folded the cloth once and then placed it on his forehead. That was the moment when Chishiya sluggishly opened his eyes. He looked a little confused for a moment.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Trying to bring your fever down."

"Well, good luck then," he replied as if it didn't even concern him.

"Do you still have a lot of pain in your arm?" I asked with increasing concern.

He looked down at it as if he needed to check whether it was still there.

"I guess so..." he mumbled.

"Please tell me what else I can do for you," I asked pleadingly.

He chuckled softly.

"You're asking me that. You're the nurse after all."

I frowned in irritation. Was this another one of his weird jokes?

"I would hardly ask you if I knew," I growled. Chishiya took the cloth from his forehead. Then, without warning, he suddenly straightened up.

"I don't have time for this nonsense now. The face cards don't win themselves, after all."

He made an effort to stand up and I was completely stunned by his words. Was he serious?

"Chishiya," I said, standing up and putting my hand soothingly on his shoulder to hold him back. "You can't go anywhere in your condition, especially not to a game. Besides, we still have plenty of time before our visa expires."

He looked at me for a moment like I was the one who had lost my mind.

"I really am fine. A little scratch like that can't hurt me."

He sounded annoyed now, while I was a little helpless. He tried to get up from the bed, but he staggered as soon as he put one foot on the floor. I pushed him firmly back onto the mattress.

"Lie down again. Come on," I tried again. "It's no good if you go outside to play now."

I sounded like I was talking to a five-year-old, but strangely enough, it actually seemed to help. Chishiya did pout for a moment, but went back to bed.

"But it's so boring here," he argued.

"I know, but the most important thing is that you get better."

"If that's really neccessary..."

I picked up the damp cloth again, which was no longer cold.

"Stay here. I'll be right back."

When I came back, I had replaced the cloth and put it back on his forehead. Then I went to the table and hesitantly squeezed a Penecillin tablet out of the blister without him noticing. I then brought him a glass of water.

"Here. Don't forget your painkillers," I said and pressed a Penecillin and a normal painkiller tablet into his hand.

"All right," he said and swallowed them down with the water.

I heaved a sigh of relief.

Fortunately, the pills looked so similar that he didn't notice the difference. He had claimed that penecillin wasn't the right antibiotic for his injury, but it was still better than no antibiotic. At least that's what I hoped for.

Time passed agonizingly slowly while Chishiya fell into another restless sleep. I had made breakfast for both of us, but as he was unresponsive, I ate alone. I began to worry more and more about his condition. He definitely hadn't been behaving normally earlier. Chishiya had usually kept a clear mind in every situation, but today he had been completely out of it. I watched a few times as he fiddled with his bandage in his sleep and scratched the wound with his right hand. I was sure that couldn't mean anything good. Chishiya had probably been right. My attempts to save his life would probably bring him an agonizing death. And it had obviously already begun. I therefore decided to sacrifice the other penecillin for him. I would probably manage without them. I wasn't so sure about Chishiya, however. He looked worse with every passing hour. In a brief waking moment, I gave him more paracetamol for the pain. Only then did his sleep become a little calmer again. When it was late afternoon, I quietly crept back over to his bed and sat down on the chair next to him again.

"Chishiya?" I asked hesitantly. I held a bowl of warm porridge in my hand. "Listen, you need to eat a snack. Please!"

No response.

His eyes were tightly closed and his breathing was slightly deeper than before. His body seemed to be in desperate need of sleep, but I didn't want to give up just yet, because without food, he wouldn't get back on his feet any time soon. I touched his healthy arm very carefully and stroked it briefly. A timid, nervous flutter spread through my stomach as I touched him, but inwardly I warned myself. Now was really not the time to think about my ridiculous infatuation. When I looked up again, I saw him slowly open his eyes.

"Are you still stalking me?" he replied in a weak voice.

A relieved smile came to my lips.

"Yes. But only because you need to get your strength back."

"You should stop trying to save my life."

"I can't do that," I said, lowering my eyes a little.

"Believe me, the world is better off without me."

I looked up again, dumbfounded, and it was a moment before I was able to reply.

"That's bullshit, Chishiya. What makes you think that?"

"I'm sure you think I'm to be envied because I'm so incredibly clever and fearless, but in reality, as you've already discovered, I'm a selfish person who couldn't care less what happens to the people around me. You might even be right. I am a sociopath. And that's why it would be better for everyone involved if I were erased from the world."

He said these words in such a completely neutral tone, as if they didn't concern him. I looked at him with a sad expression.

"It's not true that you're selfish. If you really were, I wouldn't be here and you wouldn't have a gunshot wound. You got me all those medicine and risked your life in the process. That's anything but selfish."

He sighed a little annoyed.

"I didn't do it for you. I only did it because I wanted to know what it was like to care for someone. And now you can see where it got me."

I stared at him motionlessly and then shook my head after a while.

"I don't believe you."

"If you don't believe that, why do you think I just watched at the Beach back then, knowing full well what Niragi was doing to you?" The name immediately tightened my throat. I shook my head again in disbelief. "Yes, I lied when I said I didn't know you. I knew exactly who you were when I saw you again in prison. And I knew you were one of Niragi's victims... one of his little toys. And I just watched. Because, in a way, I didn't care."

Helpless tears filled my eyes as I still shook my head vehemently. My heart felt like someone had taken it, thrown it on the floor and ruthlessly crushed it. I stood up without a word and noisily put the bowl of porridge down on the bedside table before giving Chishiya a deeply hurt look. I then went into the bathroom, where I collapsed in front of the bath and gave in to tears, completely dissolved. I could almost feel the heavy sobs taking my breath away, so I tried to calm myself down as best I could. However, the thought of Niragi and what he had done was hard to get out of my head. I had blocked it out as best I could, but Chishiya's words had brought back the memories in just a few seconds. Why did he want to hurt me? Was he really that cold and had I just been too blind to see it all this time? At the Beach, I had sometimes looked into his eyes and thought I recognized something like pity in them. But maybe I had really just been too naive. On the other hand, he had even saved my life the day before. Would someone who only thought of himself do something like that? The more I thought about it, the less I understood. At some point, a soft knock on the door snapped me out of my thoughts.

I hastily wiped the tears from my cheek.

"Yes?" I asked as firmly as I could.

"I need to come in here to fulfill my human needs," Chishiya replied. I had to admit I was a little surprised that he had managed to muster the energy to come this far. On the other hand, he really had been lying in bed for a very long time, so it wasn't surprising that he had to visit the bathroom at some point.

"Sure," I said and then got up from the cold tiled floor. I opened the door hesitantly and saw that he was standing right in front of me, so I couldn't easily walk past him. He had leaned powerlessly against the doorframe and looked at me impassively as if nothing had happened. I narrowed my eyes briefly and nonchalantly pushed past him, making no secret of the fact that I was still offended. I headed for my futon mat and lay down on it, but demonstratively facing the wall.

"Ah yes, what i wanted to tell you," he spoke up again. "You're free to leave whenever you feel like it."

Then he shut the door.