I looked longingly after Chishiya before he disappeared again at the end of the corridor. My hands were still shaking from our brief intimate moment. With each passing day, I got the feeling that Chishiya was beginning to trust me more and more. Even if he still couldn't remember our time together, my persistence might have paid off in the end.

So even if my plan didn't work out and he would never regain his memories of Borderland, we were still on the right track to getting closer again. And maybe I could even make him fall in love with me a second time. Then I would still be disappointed because his memories would be lost forever, but as long as I could be with him, that was something I would do without if necessary. Nevertheless, I didn't want to give up and follow my plan through to the bitter end.

Unfortunately, the whole thing took a lot of time and as I was here at the clinic to see Chishiya for most of the time, I only had little time to continue working on my webtoon. So I always did the sketches by hand in advance while Chishiya was busy working and as soon as I got home, I sat down at the graphics tablet and sometimes worked through the night to colour the layouts down to the last detail. But this also meant that I was lacking sleep and slowly it was starting to show.

I had therefore spent the last three days trying to follow Chishiya's advice and get some rest, but it was admittedly difficult. I probably wouldn't be able to rest until I had finally finished the last page of this webtoon. I had planned to end it as soon as my sick leave ended, which would probably be in about two weeks.

However, as soon as I had to go back to work, I would hardly find enough time for this extensive project, which is why I was under enormous time pressure. Nevertheless, I couldn't resist paying Chishiya a visit at the clinic every day. He had now become my purpose in life and my entire daily routine centred around him. I had even neglected eating considerably in the last few weeks.

Instead, I had been more concerned with making sure Chishiya had something to eat and I was extremely relieved that he had obviously enjoyed my homemade bento. I smiled a little when I thought about how he had gobbled it down almost greedily. It really had seemed as if he had been on the verge of starvation.

I glanced at the clock. It was now past 4 p.m., which meant that Chishiya had been on duty for over 10 hours. In theory, I wanted to be back home in the afternoon so that I could continue working on my webtoon, but I hadn't even had the chance to say goodbye to him earlier. Unfortunately, I was running out of time and who knows how long it would be before Chishiya finally got off work. So I packed up my things and got up.

As I passed the drinks dispenser, I saw Chishiya's colleague Nakamura, whom I'd met here several times before. He was standing in front of the vending machine, swearing a little and feverishly rummaging through his wallet.

"Do you need some change?" I asked, frowning. Nakamura turned round in astonishment.

"Oh, it's you. Yes, I'm exactly 100 yen short."

I rummaged in my pocket for my wallet and handed him a coin.

"Thank you. That's nice. You'll get it back as soon as possible," he promised.

I waved it off.

"It's all right. It won't make me much poorer now. It would be enough for me if you let Chishiya know that I'm off for the day. Unfortunately, I have a lot to do, so I can't stay that long."

He nodded as he put the money in the machine and pressed the button for a latte.

"I'll tell him."

"Thank you," I said with relief and bowed my head. "See you tomorrow then."

I turned away from him and headed for the lift.

"Hey, wait a minute," he called after me and then quickly caught up with me.

I looked at him questioningly.

"Yes?"

"Did he... tell you?" he asked hesitantly.

I frowned at him.

"Told me what?"

Nakamura's face looked a little shaky for a moment. But then he gave a strangely embarrassed laugh.

"Erm... I just mean that he has a late shift tomorrow."

"No, he doesn't. But thanks for pointing that out," I said with a smile, although I had to admit that his behaviour irritated me a little and I had the impression that it wasn't what he had actually wanted to say.

"No problem," he said generously. "But tell me..." He suddenly looked at me with unusual interest. "What exactly do you see in Chishiya? I mean, yes, he's good-looking, but otherwise he's not exactly a charming ray of sunshine, if you know what I mean...."

I chuckled a little amused at his wording.

"You're right. But he can be very different under his hard shell when he wants to be," I said with a wistful look into the distance. "But apart from that, he's also intelligent, funny and deep."

"Wow, you really have a crush on that cynic, don't you?" he replied, amused, while my cheeks glowed noticeably.

"Looks like it..."

"To each their own."

"See you tomorrow, then."

"I'm off tomorrow, but as long as Chishiya's here, I'm sure we'll bump into each other again, I suppose."

"Guess so."

I turned away from him and then took the lift down to the ground floor.

On my way home, I pondered for a long time about what Chishiya was supposed to have said to me according to Nakamura, because I was pretty sure that his answer about the late shift wasn't what he had originally meant. Maybe it had something to do with his memories. That would at least be the most obvious, but somehow I also doubted that Chishiya was someone who would simply confide something so intimate to a colleague.

When I got home, Nanya was meowing loudly and longing to be stroked.

"I'm sorry. I really was away longer than I had planned."

I compensated her with a generous treat and then booted up my laptop and drawing tablet. When everything was ready, I sat down at my desk and opened the last page I had been working on until last night after my migraine had finally gone away. It was the scene in the playground. The one where we had our first kiss. It was relatively easy for me to reconstruct it in my head because I had already drawn it once. I smiled at the memory of how Chishiya had slyly snatched my sketchpad just to find out what I had drawn. It all seemed like an eternity ago. I still remembered exactly how I had expressed my fear to him that we might not know each other after Borderland and he had dismissed it with a carefree smile. And now I was the one who had to remind him of all that again.

In fact, I also found it a bit unfair how naturally Arisu and Usagi had found each other again without any memory of what had happened, while I was doing everything humanly possible to win Chishiya back for myself. It frustrated me that it was made so difficult for me of all people and sometimes I regretted that I had obsessively tried to remember everything. Chishiya and I might have run into each other anyway and we might have fallen in love without knowing our history. But it was too late for such admissions now anyway. And at least I was well on the way to winning his heart back. I just couldn't let my guard down now and had to carry on exactly as before.

I made surprisingly good progress with the webtoon that evening, which was probably mainly due to the fact that I was still full of happy hormones from Chishiya's obvious approach. Not only had he willingly tasted my home-made food, but he had also voluntarily sought me out, more than once. The day couldn't have gone better for me. When I finally went to sleep in the middle of the night, I was overjoyed for the first time in a long time and could hardly wait to see him again the next day.

As soon as I woke up and had a snack, I was back in front of the graphics tablet with my pen in my hand. I still had a few hours until Chishiya's shift at the clinic started and I didn't want to let them go to waste. Only a certain cat lady obviously had something against it. Nanya jumped light-footedly onto the desk and placed her elegant body directly in front of my screen, completely unimpressed.

I sighed.

"Yes, I know I hardly have time for you at the moment and I'm really sorry about that," I said and stroked her long fur reassuringly. "When I'm done with this, everything will be different. I promise."

Nanya purred comfortably as I stroked her behind the ears and I actually felt guilty for having neglected her so much in the last few weeks. You could really tell how she was looking for my attention, almost like I was looking for Chishiya's attention, except that at least I wasn't lolling around on his desk to get it. I chuckled at the absurd thought and imagined the stunned look on his face if he found me there in the same position as Nanya, who was rolling onto her back in front of me to show me her plush belly. That would probably be my last act of desperation if all else failed.

Maybe I should really try to use my feminine charm more effectively and flirt with him aggressively. Now that he was more open to me, it would at least be worth a try. A soft vibration broke through my thoughts. I squinted at my mobile phone and saw Usagi's name light up on it. I reached for it and opened her message.

I looked thoughtfully at the display for a moment. I really would have liked to meet up with Usagi, but I had no idea how I was going to manage that. It would mean that I would either have less time for the webtoon or for Chishiya. Both were unimaginable for me right now and I was a little ashamed of my selfishness.

I hoped that she would be satisfied with the offer of the phone call as a compromise. If not, I had to come up with something else. When I finally managed to convince Nanya to find somewhere else to hang out, I focussed on my illustrations again and was soon completely absorbed in my work again.

Suddenly the doorbell rang. I groaned and reluctantly put down my pencil to get up and hobble to the door. A little curious, I looked through the peephole and realised that it was Hayato standing outside my flat door.

No, not him of all people.

He knocked urgently on the door.

"Tsuki? Are you there?"

I looked wistfully at my graphics tablet for a moment and then back to the door.

I wasn't really spared anything.

I hesitantly opened the door a crack. Hayato looked relieved.

"So you're here after all!"

I smiled convulsively.

"Yes, I am. What's up?" I asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"Can I...maybe come in for a minute?"

"Well, I-... haven't tidied up," I replied evasively.

"That doesn't bother me. I just want to talk to you for a minute."

But I do care. Didn't he realise from my unnerved look, my crossed arms and the suppressed rolling of my eyes that I had absolutely no desire to talk to him right now? Chishiya would have noticed for sure.

"Whatever," I said sullenly and stepped aside to let him in.

He looked around the small flat a little indecisively.

"Did you get my card and the flowers?" he asked, clearly tense.

"Yes, I did," I said curtly.

"Listen, what happened to you is terrible. I'm really very sorry. I didn't know that something like that would happen when we arranged to meet."

"Would you have cancelled sooner if you had known?" I growled.

"You know, just before we met, my father called me all upset to tell me that my mum had had a stroke. I went to see them straight away, of course, so I didn't think about cancelling in time. Sorry, Tsuki."

He made a deep bow to me and suddenly I felt guilty.

"I'm... I'm really sorry," I said sincerely. "How is your mum doing now?"

"She's coping better than expected. But there are still a few neurological tests to be done. I would have contacted you sooner, but I didn't want to impose. I thought you'd probably be angry with me."

"I'm not angry," I said calmly. "What happened isn't your fault."

"Thank you, Tsuki. It means a lot to me that you say that."

I nodded in understanding, but still hoped he would go away quickly. It was already close to 1 p.m. and I would have to make my way to the clinic if I wanted to be there on time.

Hayato suddenly put his hand on the back of his neck a little tensely and conspicuously avoided my gaze.

"Well, I also came here because I wanted to invite you to dinner tonight as compensation. I've been thinking about you a lot after everything that's happened and I'd like it if we could have another go together."

He looked up at me with an expectant expression while I feverishly thought about how to get out of this. Maybe it was best to just be honest.

"Well, that's really nice of you, Hayato, but... I think that you and I might not be a good match," I said slowly, choosing my words carefully. However, an inner voice inside me protested immediately.

That wasn't the whole truth, Tsuki.

Hayato looked at me uncomprehendingly and furrowed his brow.

"So you're still angry about this after all," he concluded with a deep sigh.

"No, no," I said quickly. "That has nothing to do with it. I swear."

"But I thought we were on the same wavelength. You said so yourself."

"Well, to be honest..." I pressed my lips together a little guiltily and fixed my eyes on the floor. "I recently met someone else."

His face looked surprised and disappointed at the same time.

"Oh," he said. "But weren't you on sick leave the whole time?"

"Well, like me, he was a victim of the Shibuya disaster and we met at the clinic as a result..." I lied. "I really like him, you know."

"I see... I guess an event like that creates a bond," he said with a bitter undertone.

"I'm sorry."

Actually, I wasn't sorry. I had always liked him and we got along well, but that was nothing compared to how I felt about Chishiya. And I was pretty sure that Hayato would find another woman who was better suited to him than me.

"It's okay," he said eventually. "How could I judge you for being honest? Maybe it's better this way anyway, since we're colleagues..."

"Yeah, maybe," I said, continuing to stare at the floor, embarrassed. "Well, I don't want to be rude, but I have another important doctor's appointment in a minute."

Which wasn't even a lie. I was seeing a doctor after all.

"When is it exactly? Would you like me to drive you there?" he asked uncertainly.

I was admittedly surprised by the kind offer. After all, I had just turned him down.

"Thanks, but that's really not necessary," I waved him off with a smile.

"I'd love to do it. I owe you that after everything."

"You don't owe me anything, Hayato. I really don't."

"Please let me help you. Just as a colleague, okay?" he urged further.

I thought about it for a moment. It would actually help me if he drove me to the clinic where Chishiya worked. It was almost an hour's journey by public transport. Hayato probably wouldn't even notice that I didn't have a doctor's appointment; after all, there were other medical departments there apart from paediatric surgery. So if he was so keen to help me, who was I to refuse his help?

My lips curved into a smile after a moment's hesitation.

"Fine, if you insist. I just need to fix my hair, if you don't mind. You can entertain Nanya for that long," I said and made my way to the bathroom.

"I'd love to, but unfortunately I'm allergic to cats," he called after me.

Another reason why it wouldn't have worked out between us.

As if I would throw Nanya out because of a man. It would't come that far. I could only hope that Chishiya wasn't allergic to cats, otherwise I would have to choose between the two of them. And that was definitely the kind of choice I didn't want to make.

When I had put on some make-up and tamed my curls, I came out of the bathroom again. Hayato had just bent over my graphics tablet with interest.

Damn.

"I'm ready," I said quickly to distract him from the screen. But he obviously couldn't tear his gaze away from it.

"What are you working on?" he asked curiously. "Is that you?"

He pointed at the comic version of me.

"Erm, yes... I'm working on a webtoon. I had this crazy idea," I mumbled, embarrassed and glad that I didn't have a page open with Chishiya on it.

"Wow, I knew you drew, but that you were so talented. What's the webtoon about?"

"That... is still a secret."

"That's a shame. It looks good, anyway."

"Thanks," I said sheepishly and then quickly switched off the laptop and the drawing tablet.

We then went down to Hayato's car, where he typed the address of the clinic into his sat nav.

"It's strange that they send you to another part of the city to have your leg x-rayed. There's a clinic nearby, isn't there?"

"Erm, well... I don't know what they were thinking," I mumbled and giggled softly.

"With your broken leg, it's almost a bit bold, don't you think?"

"Oh well, I've got time at the moment. At least this way I can get out."

I breathed a sigh of relief when he finally stopped talking about it and hoped he had somehow bought the white lie. I felt a little guilty because it felt like I was using him for my own purposes, but he hadn't wanted to let up and I didn't want to appear rude by turning down his friendly offer.

"So this man you met. Are you together?" he asked me during the journey, looking visibly nervous.

I looked at him thoughtfully. Was he just trying to make polite small talk or was he still hoping that we could become something?

"No, not yet. We're still in the dating phase," I said, feeling worse with every lie. But I could hardly tell him the whole truth.

"I see. And what does he do for a living?" he asked casually.

Of course, of all the questions, he had to ask this one.

"He's... a student. A medical student," I added, because I was sure that would be his next question.

"Really? My niece is also studying medicine. Which university does he go to?"

"Er... I've forgotten the name. I haven't been there yet either. He's just doing the practical part."

I actually had no idea which faculty Chishiya was studying at. I should probably know.

Hayato looked over at me in surprise.

"Wait a minute...is that why I'm driving you to Sakurazaka Hospital? Does he work there?"

I laughed sheepishly. I should have realised that he could put one and one together.

"Well, yes. But I really did make an appointment for an X-ray there," I assured him, even though it wasn't true.

Hayato shook his head in disbelief, but didn't seem angry. On the contrary, he seemed a little dejected and for a moment I actually felt a little sorry for him because he had obviously still got his hopes up.

"I'm sorry. I didn't necessarily want to tell you that so as not to hurt you. But you really wanted to take me there."

"That's all right. I don't blame you. I probably just missed my chance with you."

"I'm sure you'll find someone soon, Hayato. But it wouldn't be fair of me to keep pretending I'm interested when my thoughts are with someone else. I hope you understand that."

"I know. Still, I thought it could have worked out with us," he said, now taking the driveway to the main building of the clinic.

"You're a good friend and a great colleague. That won't change," I assured him.

"I just wish I could see you like that." I lowered my eyes ruefully and then stared at my hands, not knowing what to say in response. So he had more than just friendly feelings for me. To be honest, I hadn't expected that.

He parked the car in the car park and switched off the engine.

"Here we are."

I nodded hesitantly and then unfastened my seatbelt.

"Thank you, Hayato," I said politely and opened the door.

"Wait," he called hastily and then ran around the car to help me pull myself up from the seat.

"Thank you," I repeated, bowing my head in shame.

"So, I'll see you at school at the latest," he said, clearly tense.

"Looks like we will," I said, smiling tensely.

But then my gaze was drawn to something behind Hayato. Just two rows away, a car door was slammed shut and shortly afterwards I saw a light blonde mop of hair shimmering between the cars.

My heart skipped a beat. Chishiya was carrying a shoulder bag and had his hands buried in his trouser pockets. He had obviously just arrived here at the same time as us. Hayato followed my line of sight sceptically, while Chishiya's gaze lingered on me for barely a millisecond. He looked at Hayato next to me disdainfully for a moment and then walked past us without showing any recognisable reaction.

"I have to go now," I said in a panic.

"Um okay," Hayato replied, a little irritated. "See you soon."

I didn't wait until he was gone, but hurried blindly after Chishiya in the hope of catching up with him.

"Chishiya!" I shouted, a little out of breath, but he didn't stop, instead pretending he hadn't heard me. "Why don't you stop for a moment?"

He turned to me with a sigh.

"I have to go on duty now and don't have time to make conversation."

His voice sounded completely calm and yet he gave me the feeling that I had somehow annoyed him.

"You didn't even say hello," I replied somewhat reproachfully.

"Hello," he replied almost snidely. "Happy?"

I pushed my lower lip forward, pouting.

"Don't be like that."

"Oh, how so?"

"Obviously pissed off."

"I'm fine, Izumi, apart from the fact that you're keeping me busy with nothing."

He looked at me almost punitively and with every second that passed, my impression that he might be jealous grew stronger.

"If it's because of Hayato. He's a colleague of mine and he just wanted to do me a favour by bringing me here. But I have absolutely no interest in him. We're just friends. I swear that."

Chishiya's expression was completely still.

"Why do you think I'm interested in the men you're having fun with right now?" he said coldly.

For a moment, I was so stunned by his hurtful words that I was unable to respond. He turned away from me and this time I didn't even try to follow him. Instead, I hung my head and, crushed, made my way to the bench I always used.

Yesterday I thought we were on a good path to getting closer and today? What was his problem? Actually, it could only be Hayato's. My stomach tingled at the thought and a small smile came to my lips. If jealousy really was the cause of his bad mood, then I was more than willing to forgive him, because that meant that I was important to him. I just hoped he would quickly realise that there was no reason to be jealous of Hayato or anyone else.

When I saw Chishiya again after a while, he was wearing his white doctor's coat and had his white-blonde hair tied back at the nape of his neck as usual. Although I now saw him in his work clothes almost every day, I still couldn't get over the sight. The picture on his ID didn't do him justice.

I looked at him expectantly as he walked towards me, only to be disappointed to realise that he walked past me completely unimpressed without even a hint of a reaction.

"Hey, stop ignoring me!" I complained defiantly.

To my surprise, Chishiya turned round and looked at me with a neutral expression.

"I'm not ignoring you. I'm just busy."

"I'm perfectly capable of recognising that you obviously don't want to talk to me. I don't know what I've done to you, Chishiya, but it hurts when you treat me like this," I said with a downhearted expression on my face. "At least it would be fair if you told me exactly what your problem is."

We just looked at each other in silence for a while.

Suddenly, he glanced to the side and looked almost uncomfortably touched.

"It's my fault. Something like this... just doesn't really suit me."

For a moment, I felt like I'd been transported back in time and just stared at him, speechless. In the next moment, I giggled unrestrainedly.

Chishiya furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"Sorry," I chuckled softly. "I just think it's cute when you're jealous. Well, in hindsight anyway."

He raised his eyebrow in surprise.

"Cute, then, is it?" he returned somewhat bitterly, as if I had personally insulted him. "And I was trying to appear confident."

I grinned with amusement at his feigned indignation.

"Don't worry. You're confident. But you're also sweet."

"Sounds rather paradoxical," he said, an almost imperceptible smile stealing onto his lips.

"You make the impossible possible."

"I'm sorry, but I really have to get on with it."

I nodded with a smile.

"No problem."

Chishiya didn't budge, though, so I just looked at him with a questioning expression.

"If everything goes well today, I could take a longer break around 6 p.m.," he said without looking at me.

"Okay," I replied, hoping he would keep talking.

"I usually go down to the canteen to get something for dinner."

"I see," I said, trying hard to suppress a victorious grin, even though it was difficult.

"If you want to come with me, I wouldn't mind."

I beamed happily at him.

"Now I feel really honoured," I teased him a little and couldn't hold back my amused grin any longer.

He nodded curtly and the corners of his mouth twisted into a tiny smile.

"I'll pick you up here later when I'm ready."

My heart raced with excitement.

"I can't wait."

At the moment I am a bit obsessed with this AI hugging & kissing app cause now I can do little videos with Chishiya and Tsuki kissing. I made some screenshots of those videos and I added one of them to Chapter 17. Unfortunately I can't upload videos on here only when they're published on Youtube which I don't want right now. But it's a nice way to get pictures of Chishiya kissing and hugging Tsuki 🥹 (and yes it's fu***ing expensive)