twenty-seven: bittersweet
Taehyung had been asleep when Jungkook got back from picking Yoongi and Jimin up from the hospital - the sound of the door closing shook him awake. Lifting his head from his pillow, Taehyung threw aside the covers Jungkook had draped over him and rushed out of his bedroom, completely disregarding earlier admonishments to 'take it easy'. Somehow he knew immediately who was at the door and nothing else mattered to him.
"Yoongi-!"
He expected to see Yoongi - and he did, but what he didn't expect was to see Jimin lying in Yoongi's arms, soon to be carried gingerly over to the empty couch. Taehyung was tempted to call out the blond's name as well but held back.
"He'll be fine," Yoongi said before Tae could ask. "In fact, he's not even asleep right now. Should be, but isn't."
"They didn't do anything to him, did they??"
"No, Tiger, so stop stressing."
A massive wave of relief washed over Taehyung in that moment, and he stopped to breathe deeply before making his way over his friend who was gesturing him to do so. Jungkook watched the boy's steps intently in case he should stumble.
"You feel okay, Tae?" He asked him. Taehyung nodded firmly and lowered himself to the floor beside the couch.
"Fine."
It was just as Yoongi had said, Tae soon discovered. Jimin wasn't sleeping. His eyes were open, only slightly, but open noticeably enough. A cast over his left arm, a few minor bruises but he knew it could have been a lot worse - although, he did recall the nurse mentioning about a broken rib, but of course that wasn't something he could see with his eyes so it wasn't as vividly on his mind.
"Jimin."
At the mention of his name, the blond ever so slowly tilted his head so that he could meet Taehyung's gaze - and straightaway anyone could tell the way it affected him. No doubt, having gone from the boy's severe stares of betrayal and demanding questions to a soft whisper and look of genuine concern...it was a bit much to process.
"Does it hurt for him to talk, Yoongi?" Tae asked, glancing at his friend over his shoulder.
"He said it didn't."
"It's fine," Jimin uttered quietly. The boy sitting in front of the couch turned to him suddenly. "I'm fine, Taetae, I'm sorry..."
"You were hit by a car. Why are you apologizing??"
"For hurting you."
Taehyung drew in a deep breath through his nostrils, letting it out a second later. "If I could understand why, I could forgive you without a problem." He scanned the blond's face. "I just don't understand anything that's going on, Jimin, I just want to understand. What were those photos? Why were Yoongi and I in those photos?"
"Don't overwhelm him with questions," Yoongi warned. There was a hint of panic in his voice. "With his broken rib, it's best he remains as calm as possible."
"Right. Of course." Taehyung shook his head so as to dismiss the urge to let out all his questions at once. It was as Yoongi had said to him earlier - he needed to breathe just as much as Jimin did. So he paused to let the air become quiet again, to sort through his thoughts, to breathe. His eyes caught sight of those photographs lying on the floor. He had dropped them there before recklessly running after Jimin that morning.
He took them in hand with care. Holding them like artifacts, precious artifacts that if not handled properly, would turn to ashes and slip through his fingertips.
His heart felt compressed between the walls of his ribcage as he stared at them. An indescribable pain that made his eyes water without his realizing.
"This may be cruel of me to say, but I'm glad it still bothers you."
Jimin's curious statement urged Taehyung to look up at him again. "What?"
"Not being able to remember me."
"Well, why can't I remember you?!"
Raising his voice wasn't intentional - it came from the depths of Taehyung's chest, an insuppressible thought that would have killed him inside if not voiced sooner rather than later. He regretted shouting not a second afterwards. But again, he couldn't have helped it. It came out of nowhere and fed on his helpless state, giving him nothing in return but an even stronger urge to cry.
"Jimin, why...?"
"Taehyung, can I ask you a question?"
"A question?" He stared at Jimin in disbelief. The tension and stress were already building up again fast, and Jungkook worried for the boy, so he took it upon himself to sit next to Taehyung on the floor and take hold of his hand. It helped - some, and that was all he could ask for.
There was a long moment then, void of words, only silence, space for thoughts. Jimin was clearly looking for the right thing to say - on the tip of his tongue, it seemed to be, as though he knew exactly what he wanted to say, but not knowing how to get it across. Taehyung chose to be patient even though his chest ached from it.
"I won't get mad."
His words slipped.
"Please, Jimin."
"It's okay if you do," the blond said soon after. "You have every right to be mad at me for stealing your memories. Both of you do."
It knocked his breath right out of him. And the first thing Taehyung thought to do was turn his eyes to Yoongi, who he found staring blankly at the floor.
"...that's..." His own breathing wasn't stable. Jungkook squeezed his hand. "...that's not a question, you said you had a question..."
"I was going to ask when you first discovered you had purple blood."
"Senior year of high school."
"So you haven't had it your whole life."
"I haven't."
"Have you ever wondered why?"
"Of course I have!" Taehyung exclaimed, once again internally scolding himself for not being quieter. "It's always bothered me...I've never done anything particularly daring like eat a wild plant or something stupid like that, it just...happened...and..."
"Taetae, it wasn't your fault."
"What wasn't my fault?"
"Tiger, just calm down, he's trying to explain," Yoongi joined. He reached out to rest his hand on Taehyung's head for a moment.
"We were friends once, is that it?"
Jimin's eyes were fixed on the ceiling. Whether it hurt to move his head, or he was simply too guilty to look at Taehyung again, the boy didn't know. But judging by the expression in those eyes, the latter seemed more likely.
"The best of friends."
"And you stole our memories," Taehyung added quickly. Now it was him squeezing Jungkook's hand to prevent himself from getting more worked up. "Why did you steal our memories, Jimin? If we were such good friends..."
His voice cracked. It shut him up, for a short time, as Jungkook lifted his hand to wipe the boy's tears.
"If we were such good friends, Jimin...why would you take that from me...?"
"You almost died because of me."
Jimin raised his voice this time, from a soft, tender tone barely above a whisper, to something much more solemn - quiet, but it still demanded attention.
"Those people I told you about, the ones dealing with the black market," he began, his words seeming to quiver as he spoke, "they found me in Daegu when I was with you and Yoongi. When I was vulnerable. And...they hurt you two...but you, Tae, most of all, you-...would have bled to death if I hadn't done something."
Taehyung couldn't find it in himself to speak. His mind blanked but still strove to process the what this boy uttered so emotionally.
"I didn't know at the time what effect it would have on you...but really, it's a simple thing we learn as kids, you know?" A forced chuckle. "Red and blue makes purple..."
And then it clicked in his brain.
"I only meant to save your life, not make it a living hell, I'm so sorry, Taetae..."
It was like finding a missing piece to a puzzle, fitting it together, and finally realizing what the picture was supposed to be. But finishing that puzzle triggered a cave-in within Taehyung's mind, because although now he understood, the pain didn't go away - in fact, it only increased. Because it made sense. It all made sense, down to the last detail, from his missing childhood and adolescent memories down to comprehending why the purple blood showed up so late in his life rather than having been there from birth.
"Jimin and I were dating, apparently," Yoongi added after having remained silent for some time. "Not to throw more wood in the fire or anything, but I thought it was valid information."
Taehyung sniffled. He felt like his eyes were burning, but as he looked up at Yoongi and saw his friend smiling, it relieved him somewhat. In a strange yet comforting way.
"Dating?"
"Yeah, I gave him a promise ring and everything."
"Do you..." Taehyung paused to glance at Jimin. "...do you remember it?"
"No, sadly," Yoongi said with a shake of his head. "Would love to, but it is what it is."
"I'm sorry..."
"N-no, Jimin, I'm not trying to guilt-trip you here-"
"If I could give back your memories, I would."
Such heavy, stirring regret pouring out through those words. The three other people in the room all stared at Jimin in silence.
"I can't give, I can only take away..."
For what felt like hours, no one said a thing.
"You can always..."
Jungkook was the first to speak.
"...make new ones, right? New memories can be just as good as old ones...even better sometimes..."
It drew a smile from Taehyung who didn't even feel like smiling at the time. He was helpless to it, to the way he knew in his heart what Jungkook was referring to.
He leaned over to kiss the boy's cheek.
"He has a point," Yoongi soon added. "A very positive point, and I think that's what we all need right now. A little positivity."
"Right, what I was thinking." Jungkook nodded. He touched the spot on his cheek where Taehyung's lips had just been, distressed as Tae pulled that hand away and those same lips kissed the spot again.
Jimin saw out of his peripheral vision. He said nothing, did nothing, but on the inside the sight of it brought him happiness. Knowing his dear friend had found at least some happiness in his life, his dear friend who he swore hated him, but who already seemed to have forgiven him.
Bittersweet, this day had been.
It wasn't much later that Taehyung finally got to his feet, claiming he wanted to lie down for a bit and naturally Jungkook accompanied him. Yoongi, however, stayed. Taking a step closer to the couch, he sat down on the floor where his friend had formerly been, then proceeded to take Jimin's hand in his own and rest his head against it.
And he stayed that way for quite some time.
Dwelling on Jimin's words, from earlier that day at the hospital, and from mere moments ago. An avalanche of information that anyone could choose to deny, to disbelieve, but he knew it to be true.
"We won't..."
All energy had escaped him but he spoke anyway.
"We won't let you leave us again...do you hear me, Jimin?"
He watched the blond nod weakly.
"And another thing, as soon as you get better, you're going to have to remind me of all the reasons I fell in love with you, why I...gave you a freakin' promise ring..."
The emphasis drew the softest laugh from Jimin. "It was custom-made, too..."
"Custom-made??"
"Yeah...had your nickname and birthday on it..."
"Oh...wow, okay...uh, anything else you wanna tell me?"
"We kissed a lot."
"...v-valid information, uh...-"
"I've missed the taste of your lips, Sugabear..."
Though it made Yoongi feel shy, the tenderness of the boy's voice brought a lightheartedness to the conversation that comforted him.
"I'm not saying you have to kiss me," Jimin added after a moment, so as to reassure Yoongi or rid of any potential awkwardness. "I wouldn't blame you for not wanting to. Technically, you just met me yesterday..."
"Correction, technically, I've known you since we were kids," Yoongi stated matter-of-factly. "And technically, we're still dating, unless you broke up with me after that incident happened and didn't tell me..."
"I never broke up with you. That would have made your promise ring a waste..."
"Then we're still dating."
He knew it would embarrass him to hesitate at this point, so before this shred of confidence abandoned him, Yoongi gave Jimin's lips a soft peck before standing up.
"Get some rest, Jimin. We'll talk more later."
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end of chapter twenty-seven.
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