This chapter dedication goes to Ivy, they are constantly supportive of this book and I couldn't ask for anything more! Thank you for it all, love!
ivorynoelle ♥️♥️♥️

(25th December 1977)

Steam rose from Marlene's mug of tea a million licks at a time, like it were wisps of cigarette smoke stolen out the window.
She sat curled up on the couch in her living room, soaking up the quiet house, savouring the serenity before her family and Esme-Leigh –whom had been staying with them– awoke, and inevitably filled the house with life. Loud, invasive life.

Christmas mornings had some sort of significance to them that Marlene couldn't quite place. There was something about the seclusion that felt like walking a fine border between excitement and apprehension. It felt like the calm before the storm.

"Up early, I see?"

Marlene looked up to see Lucas McKinnon, the youngest of her three older brothers. His dirty blonde hair still rumpled from sleep and his glasses placed untidily on his nose. It was moments like this when Marlene wondered if he was her brother at all, or if he were just James'.

Lucas grinned, sitting down on the armchair opposite her. They spent the Christmas holidays in the McKinnon estate in Bath, which meant plush turquoise suites, placed next to atmospherically lit windows, overlooking snow covered fields and gentle hills. It was a beautiful sight to behold, especially with the crackling magic of Christmas that filled the air.

"So, lets hear it."

Marlene stared blankly at her brother's brazen grin. "Hear what?"

"I want to know about you! Who's this Muggle girl you've been writing to me about? Who's likely to win the quidditch cup? How are you finding being Head Girl? Give me the whole nine yards, Marly." 

Marlene took a long drink from her mug, savouring the sting of the liquid's temperature slipping down her throat and lingering on her tongue.

She took a breath, levelling herself as if for battle, "First of all, you know I hate 'Marly'. Secondly, it's almost impossible to tell you everything in one go. I need targeted questions."

Lucas grinned jocosely, a glint in his hazel eyes that reminded her, yet again, of a certain marauder.
"Fine. You ready for the cross-examination of your life, Marlene?"
She nodded, rolling her shoulders and matching his tricksy smile.

They talked for an hour, covering Dorcas, quidditch training, head girl duties and the Magical Prejudice Protection. Lucas had left school by the time it was set up in their fifth year, and so he'd never been able to experience the passion for it that Marlene certainly had. She told him about the attack on Aliona, how Trudy had attacked Mulciber, and how the whole MPP was put in jeopardy. She told him how Jasmine Sempere saved the day by blackmailing their then Defence teacher, Professor Playford (Lucas found this part of the tale outrageously risible, having been on quite good terms with Jazzy, her being the year below him at school).

By the time they had said all they wanted to, Felicity McKinnon had woken up, delighted to see her two youngest children enjoying the quiet air of Christmas morning.

She summoned her own cup of tea with a flick of her wand as she came to sit next to Marlene on the couch.
"Merry Christmas, my darlings," Felicity beamed, her voice low, so as not to wake the rest of the house.

"Merry Christmas, mum," Lucas replied as Marlene rested her head on her mother's shoulder.

"Get over here, boy! I want a hug from my two untameable children before the holiday spirit gets into you both, you drink too much and end up giving me the headache!"

This made Lucas light up with laughter, his circular glasses falling further off his nose.
"You have such little faith in us, mother! What makes you think that it won't be Darren that gets sloshed? Merlin knows he needs a drink the amount of work he does."

"Shut up and hug me, Lucas or I'll leave you behind when we go to the Potter's today!"

This time the youngest McKinnon brother didn't waste any time in slipping into the snug space on Felicity's other side, wrapping his arm around her and reaching far enough to allow Marlene to take his hand.

"See? This is nice."

Marlene squeezed Lucas' hand and snuggled closer to her mother. No matter how old she got, nothing could quite rival the feeling of safety she got from being here.

This in itself, she realised, was its own sort of magic. The kind of magic that could be experienced by anyone– muggle, witch or wizard. The world was dark, people went missing without explanation; death eaters attacked more and more; the newspaper was riddled with stories that could dissuade a heart of stone from picking it up. But being under the arm of someone that made you feel completely, and consumingly secure? There was nothing like it.

"Yeah," Marlene sighed, "it is nice."

♣ ♣ ♣

(25th December 1977 continued)

Letters arrived at the window just as Esme-Leigh joined the McKinnon family in the main living room.

"Oh!" She exclaimed in surprise, jaunting over to the windowsill to retrieve the post.
"Hey Buddy!" She cooed while untying the letters from the owl –Buddy's foot.

"I got it."

Esme turned to see Marlene grinning at her, "Merry Christmas, best friend!"

The two of them had three letters each, Felicity had a small pile and Lucas received one too.
The top of Marlene's set of letters was a small package, she noticed Esme seemed to have one as well

"You know what this is?"

Esme shook her head, "open yours first."

The package was wrapped in Muggle newspaper and tried with white string, it looked far too elegant, she almost didn't want to open it. However, past the guilt of ruining the packaging there was an overbearing sense of curiosity and so, carefully, Marlene peeled back the newspaper to reveal a small canvas with a hand painted landscape on it. This one was of Venice, it was raining on a cobbled street and there was a setting sun on the horizon.
On the back was a small note written in blue ink:

Merry Christmas, Marlene, and all the best for the new year! See you at school, love Aliona

Marlene looked up, "yours from Aliona too?"
Esme held up her own scene of Paris, a distant look in her eye but she didn't reply verbally.

One of the letters was written in the same blue ink, the other two weren't as recognisable but they looked to be from Trudy and Mary.
The letter from Aliona looked to be important so she made a mental note to open it later, when the was alone.

Trudy's letter was a bright wishing of Merry Christmas and a promise to stop by with her family later at the Potter's. Despite being predominantly Slytherin, the branch of the Nott family that Trudy fell on were in quite good favour with the Potters and so were usually in attendance at Potter Manor during the Christmas period. However in the absence of Euphemia they didn't have much of a reason to be there, seen as the usual party wasn't being held. Regardless, the letter was lovely and included well wishes from Ozma, Trudy's sixth year girlfriend.

Mary's letter was similar to Trudy's. A warm wishing of Merry Christmas and an admission of sympathy for having to spend it without Euphemia. There were pictures of her new twin sisters there too (who had been named Sage and Eloise after much discussion).

Once Marlene was finished with the letters she noticed Esme-Leigh had gone to get ready, as had her mother and Lucas, leaving her in the company of her other two brothers and Stephen who was busy in the kitchen preparing food to take to the Potter's later.

Darren –the second born McKinnon sibling and chairman of Euphemia's Magical Peace Process– was just finishing reading his own letter when he jumped off the sofa and raced to the cloakroom to retrieve his travelling cloak.

"Mother! I need to go! Amira's sister just owled, she's gone into labour!"

Marlene went running after her brother, "she's what?!"

Darren turned to face his sister, only then did she see the beaming smile on his face, "she's in labour, Marls! You're going to be an aunt!"

"Holy shit, really?!" Usually Marlene was not the type for squealing like an preadolescent, however her delirium seemed to take primary control.

"I really need to go, but as soon as the baby's born I'll send a patronus to the Potters, okay?"

Felicity had appeared behind her while Darren spoke, wearing an expression that made her look ten years younger with the glow.
"Off you go, boy! Give that fiancée of yours a kiss from me, okay? She'll be brilliant!"

"Will do! Bye everyone!"

And just like that, Darren disappeared with a crack...

So caught up in the melee, Marlene had almost forgotten to read Aliona's letter. She was dressed and ready for the Potter's get-together, sporting a black skirt, red turtle neck and her signature crimson lipstick. She'd finished styling her hair early and so decided to read it now, before they left.

Dear Marlene,

Hopefully this letter reaches you in time for Christmas so it's still appropriate for me to wish you a happy Christmas? I hope you liked the canvas too, I paint things sometimes when I'm trying to think, and it's the thinking I've done while painting those little canvases that's lead me to write you this follow up letter.

I'm not sure if you remember exactly what you said to me on those days that I slept in your Head Girl's dorm, on the nights I was avoiding Trudy. But you told me some things that've stuck for a while and I wanted to tell you something:

The first night I stayed with you, you told me that Trudy loves me, but maybe not in the same way I love her? But the problem is, Marlene, that I think I might love her. Like really love her and I'm not sure what to do about it. It's far too late to tell her now, she's so happy with Ozma. And I need to pretend to be delighted for her, but Marlene I feel so selfish. I feel so bloody awful for every time my gut twists when she talks about Ozma, every time she kisses her in front of me. And above all, I hate the fact that I can't hate her Ozma, I mean– because she's so wonderful and they're so good together.

I'm sorry to word vomit this all on you but we've sort of gotten closer this past year and a bit (it's a miracle what a near death experience will do to a girl) and I felt safe coming to you, especially since you've got your girl, Dorcas (I think that's her name, sorry if I'm remembering wrong– it's only that you always just refer to her as 'your girl' so I'm never really sure what her name is?)

Anyway, I hope your Christmas is/was okay, especially since it'll be your first one without Effie. I remember how close you two were from back when I went out with James. This Christmas must be hard, so as well as the little canvas I was to offer you another gift: You don't have to take me up on it, I know you've got the boys and Esme-Leigh, but if you ever want an objective set of eyes on any dilemma in your life, I'd like you to feel safe coming to me. (Here's hoping you won't need it, though!)

Once again, happy holidays darling! Wishing you well for the new year!

Love and friendship,
Aliona Connelly xx

Marlene didn't quite know what to make of the letter but it required immediate response, the only issue being she was out of ink from sending Christmas letters to the friends she wouldn't see today.

"ESME!"

"OUI?"
Marlene followed the satiny French accent of her best friend all the way to the guest bedroom she was staying in.

Esme-Leigh also appeared to be ready, her hair once again red and green for the festivities and tied up in two buns. Her glasses were pushed up high on her nose, like they usually were when she's been reading something.

"Esme, you got any ink I could nick? I've got to respond to Aliona the now, just before we head off."

Esme turned to face Marlene, wearing an expression that reeked of secrets, a light blush dashed across her freckles.
"Yeah sure, it's green but it'll have to do."

"No worries."

It was only as Marlene drew close that she noticed her friend was clutching a letter to her chest arcanely, as if she were hiding it from prying eyes.

"Whatcha got there, pet?"

"Nothing!"

"Uh-huh?..." Marlene raised a trained eyebrow on her friend. Her skeptical look had become a thing of nightmares as she perfected it over the years, and it had only gotten better since being awarded Head Girl.

"It's just Mary."

"Just Mary? Esme, darling, is there anything you want me to know regarding 'just Mary' these days? You two have been awful close since she started tutoring you in Astronomy."

"Nope. Nothing. Nothing at all."

If the colour of Esme-Leigh's cheeks seemed to incriminate her slightly, then the colour of her hair incriminated her immensely. It had morphed from the festive red and green to a blush-pink.

"Whatever, pet. Give us that ink, will you?"

Without another word, Esme handed her the ink pot and hastily blinked her hair back into its Christmasy attire, matching the red jumper dress she wore.

"Ta."

Marlene sat down as soon as she got back in her own room, choosing to set aside the colour of beetroot Esme had adopted earlier to tease her with at a later date.

Aliona, (she wrote)

Merry Christmas to you too! I adore my canvas, it's going to look beautiful hung up next to all my posters and vinyls. I've got a wall dedicated to decorating with my favourite things and I've got the perfect spot to fit it in– it's gorgeous!

I don't have long to reply but your 'matter' seemed urgent and so I'm replying before I leave to see the Potters (and possibly the subject of this letter if the Notts choose to drop by).
First of all I would like to say that although we had our fair share of late night conversations during your time in my dorm, I don't remember a lot of them. However that one I do. And as a matter of fact– my wisdom extends farther than memory so here's my advice:

Ozma and Trudy seem happy to me, and I know the last thing you want to do is destroy that, but I can also sympathise with the fact that seeing them together must be truly destroying. I can't empathise in this situation because I can't say I've been in it, however I think I might have been the 'Trudy' last year.

It's no secret I talk about my girl a lot (and yes, her name is Dorcas, you were correct), and I talked extensively about her to a girl who later confessed their own feelings for me. And it made me feel terrible, and the girl was really lovely about it, telling me she didn't want me to leave Cas or anything like that– only that she thought I should know– and while it made me feel guilty, it didn't make me doubt my relationship with my girl. She's the only girl I've ever loved and probably the only girl I ever will.
What I'm trying to say is that if you tell Trudy how you feel, in a controlled manner, explaining to her that you're not trying to get in the way if her relationship with Ozma, then if she truly loves Ozma it won't upset her relationship. If she's comfortable with Ozma then she'll he considerate to you (because if I know Trudy, she'll be rolling in apologies for flaunting her relationship around you and probably buy you your own weight in chocolate to say sorry) and if she's not comfortable in her relationship, it will give her more to think about. Which in the long run will benefit Ozma as well.

I hope this has somewhat helped you make sense of the situation. Give Trudy my love if you see her and I've not already replied to her letter by then.
See you at school, pet.

Love,
Marlene McKinnon xx

P.S: thank you for your offer– I might take you up on it one day.

♣ ♣ ♣

(25th December 1977 continued)

James noticed Sirius hadn't made it home as soon as he opened his eyes on Christmas morning. The past few years he'd always be somewhere in his room, bounding around in excitement like a toddler.

Sirius adored Christmas. James put it down to the fact that he hadn't had many good ones growing up, that was until he reached Hogwarts age and the marauders had made it their mission to show Sirius what he'd been missing out on. So since first year, Christmas had become Sirius' favourite of the year.

Which was why it struck James as odd not to see him here, disrupting a perfectly peaceful sleep to open presents and have a quidditch match in the freezing cold.

However, despite Sirius' absence being the first thing he noticed, the first thing he saw was sitting on his dresser. He'd wrapped it the night before so it wasn't a surprise to find it there, but it made James smile all the same.

His gift for Lily was perched, rather precariously, on his dresser, atop a pile of books he'd collected from too much time spent in his home library. The label read her name, written in his own cursive hand and signed with an x in the corner. He hadn't quite decided when he was going to get the present to her, especially since the last time he'd seen her was with the boy from the cafe, but he couldn't bring himself to think about that in the moment. But the reminder that, at some point, he would see her today filled him with hope, it spread through him, soft like silk, reaching every capillary in his body.

Sirius was right– Christmas was a fabulous day...

James emerged, fully showered and dressed down the stairs half an hour later, taking the liberty of pouring himself a cup from the coffee pot left out either by the elves or his father.

The aforementioned Fleamont Potter sat in his usual arm chair in the small sitting room, sipping his own mug of coffee and reading the paper.

"Merry Christmas, dad!" James grinned hugging him briefly and settling on the arm of his father's chair.

"Merry Christmas, son! No sign of Sirius?"

"He didn't get home last night. No doubt Remus is to blame. I'll be having words when they arrive, that's assuming he won't ditch us on Christmas."

Fleamont smiled, "don't silly yourself, James. As if Sirius would miss out on being the centre of attention."

This made James laugh, the raucous sound filling the previously tranquil air.
When James laughed, it was damn near impossible not to at least crack a smile for those in his company –present included– and so Fleamont found himself grinning too.

Just then something caught the senior Potter's eyes by the window.
"Posts here, son. Away and get it for your old dad? There's a good lad."

The post wasn't a substantial amount. There was a small pile of letters and a two little packages wrapped with newspaper, one addressed to Sirius, the other to James.

He handed his father his pile of letters before getting started on his own. There were letters from his quidditch team (bar Marlene and Sirius who would see him anyway); a letter from Trudy, one from Jasmine and finally a short note from Aliona.

James,

Merry Christmas! I hope it isn't weird to receive a Christmas gift from your ex-girlfriend? If it's any consolation to the awkwardness– I've made one for the other boys, and the girls dorm.
Hope you're doing okay and coping with your first Christmas without your mum. She was an exceptional woman.

Kindest wishes,
Aliona xx

James smiled at the gesture as he opened the small package to reveal a canvas with the city of London painted on it. He found himself sucking in a breath at its splendour, the brush work was immaculate, everything was gorgeous, right down to the tiny dots for little people that frequented the perpetually bustling streets.

Once he'd read the other letters he looked up to see his father was finished reading his (or at least enough for now; there were lots of Ministry officials wishing him a happy holiday). Fleamont was watching James with a curious, somehow remorseful gaze. His brown eyes flashing with sorrow.

"Do you remember how many bloody letters your mother used to get this time of year?" He asked, the twinkle that shone in his eyes whenever he spoke about his late wife returned; releasing some of the age in his face, making him look almost youthful.

"Yeah," James breathed out, not quite a laugh– but something. He went to sit back down across from his father, "all sorts of people would write her. She was always so proud to get all those letters."

"She'd reply to every single one. All the first years that managed to get to Hogwarts safely, all the muggleborn adults, in secure jobs because of her fighting. She was extraordinary, your mother. We were the luckiest bastards on the planet to be her family."

James nodded, his throat felt uncomfortably tight in that moment, like someone had sucked all the air out his body without him noticing. Or a hole had been punctured in his lung and air could no longer get in.

Fleamont smiled, his eyes now glistening with fond tears. "You're mother was a special woman, James, but you don't need me to tell you that. I never got to thank you, by the way."

"Me?" James held his hand to his chest, "what for?"

"For being there. I was away in Newcastle, sorting out that whole Snatcher issue, but somehow you knew when it was about to happen and you were there. I'm sorry, son. Sorry that you had to do it on your own."

James felt tears of his own sting the backs of his eyes, tasting the salt in his throat.
"I wasn't alone. Mum was there."

Fleamont nodded, his gaze dropping for a second before landing back on James, looking directly into his son's eyes.
"You helped her so much that night, just being there with her. She died with a smile on her face because you were in her arms. I don't think she'd have preferred to go another way."

James no longer trusted himself to speak. His throat hurt, his eyes hurt, but more than anything his heart hurt. It ached. Losing his mother felt like someone had punctured his heart, taken out his most needed part and left the rest to rot, disease slowly spreading through until it all died.

That was what scared him so much about love. That was why he'd kissed Aliona all those months ago, when he was far too dunk to care; it was why he didn't allow himself to feel for Lily what he knew he did; it was why a bout of nonpareil pain shot through him whenever Esme kissed his cheek of ruffled his hair. Because one day he'd be as desperately in love as his father was; and one day he would have to let that go.

Fleamont Potter smiled something sad through his tears, reading his son's thoughts like they were is own.
"I've got something for you." He said kindly, catching his son's thoughts and cradling them. He handed James a small package, "I was going to give this to you later on but I thought you should have it now."

James regarded his father curiously for a moment before opening the velvet box. Inside was a silver chain, his mother's simple wedding ring was looped through it, hanging off the necklace and catching the light Alamodome regally.

"Dad—"

"—James, I want you to have it. Your mother would want you to have it too. If you were a girl then I'm sure that engagement ring would have been addressed to you in her will as well, but I doubt it'd fit you. I should probably give it to Marlene, but she won't take it either."

James chuckled, salty, bitter tears still clouded his vision as he lifted the necklace with his mother's ring out its box and placed it over his neck, tucking it into his shirt so it rested on his heart.

"There, see. Just where it belongs. I've got plenty of memories from that ring anyway, I put it on her finger, for Merlin's sake! I've got my own." Fleamont held up his own left hand to present a matching ring on his fourth finger. He never took it off in all the time he'd been married to Euphemia, it seemed even death was not a valid enough reason to make him reassess that decision.

James smiled, an appreciative, bittersweet smile, still filled with tears.
"Thank you dad. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, my boy."

♣ ♣ ♣

(25th December 1977 continued)

It took Sirius three attempts to drag his boyfriend out of bed that Christmas morning.

"Come on, love, it's Christmas for Merlin's sake! The best day of the year! We're wasting precious minutes!"

Remus grunted into his pillow by way of response.

"Oh get up, fun-sponge! I'm going back home to Prongs', if you don't swing by later then I might have to kill you come Boxing Day, that is if the hangover doesn't kill me first," Sirius was grinning the whole time he spoke, laughing when Remus finally rolled over and propped himself up onto his elbows.

"Fine, me 'n Pete will drop by later, as long as you leave me in peace. Kiss me goodbye?"

Sirius laughed, as if his request was absurd and Remus were moronic to even ask. He leant over the bed and pressed a doting kiss to his boyfriend's lips, expanding out to kiss over a few of Remus' scars while he was there. One on his cheek, another just in front of his ear, the third on his jaw.
"How long till the full moon?"

"Three days."

"Well you look radiant for this time of month."

"Tripe."

Sirius laughed, kissing his lips again.
"No it's not, Moony, I think you're beautiful, scars and all."

"—warts."

"Huh?"

Remus chuckled as he watched Sirius struggle to pull his other arm through his jacket, "'warts and all'. That's the phrase. Not 'scars.' It's Oliver Cromwell"

"Either way. I think you're brilliant."

"Don't flatter me."

"I'll do what I like, Moons. Now get up and kiss your mother for me, tell her I'm asking for her, alright? And I'll see you later."

Remus nodded, still not moving, instead he basked in the wonder that was Sirius Black as he pulled his hair back with his wand in attempt to look presentable when he arrived back at the Potter's.
He kissed Remus one more time before disappearing with a crack.

♣ ♣ ♣

(25th December 1977 continued)

When Sirius arrived back into the Potter's house the McKinnons had all arrived, including Esme-Leigh, so had Millard McQuade and the Notts, although by the fact the Notts hadn't removed their travelling cloaks, Sirius got thrown impression they weren't staying.

"Padfoot! I'm going to be an aunt!" The voice of Marlene McKinnon was the first to reach him, and fling herself into his arms with glee. Unlike her best friend, Marlene only got this affectionate with her friends when she was either extremely excited, or unbearably downcast and judging by the way her legs were kicking arrhythmically, it wasn't a hard deduction to make that she was positively ecstatic.

"Darren's missus is in labour?" He asked, glancing around and noticing that Darren, in fact, wasn't here.

"Yep! Amira's sister owled this morning, telling Dar to get to St Mungo's. He said he'd send a patronus when the baby was born!"

Sirius squeezed her tightly, spinning round in a quick circle before letting her down and she flounced off, supposedly to tell Trudy all about her bother and his fiancée. Trudy adored children and so, despite having never met either of them, seemed to be almost as excited as Marlene.

James was next to greet Sirius on his return.
"What's wrong with your own bed?" He inquired with a puckish wink, elbowing him in the ribs.

"Remus isn't in it."

James seemed to laugh with his whole person when he said that, his eyes lighting up and his head tilting back. Sirius caught a glance of something shimmering around James' neck, tucked into his shirt collar that Sirius hadn't seen before. He decided not to inquire about it when Esme ran up to him.

"Joyeux Noël!" She exclaimed, hugging him tightly and pressing her soft lips to his cheek. She should have looked ridiculous with her red and green hair, and with one eye gold while the other was silver. But somehow, by some miracle, she looked angelic.

"You better not be wearing lipstick or I'm in trouble when Remus arrives later."

"Don't worry it's only lip gloss," she reassured him, using her sleeve to wipe it off. "You shouldn't have let Marlene plant one on you though, hers is red."

"McKinnon!"

Marlene turned round from her conversation with Trudy and her mother to laugh in his face. Some friend.

Everyone seemed to be smiling in that moment. The Notts were still in their travelling coats but Fleamont was trying to convince William Nott, Trudy's father to stay for a drink while he vehemently maintained that they were only stopping by.

Only then did Sirius notice that Marlene and Esme-Leigh must have put some music on because the Muggle gramophone was spinning on its table top, playing a Christmas collection of songs that Dorcas had bought Marlene last year.

The room was more filled than Sirius had ever seen it. The Notts weren't a large family, but the McKinnons were, and they seemed to take up just as much room in spirit as they did physically.

Sirius went over to join James, taking a seat next to him and listening in on the conversation he was having with Lucas and Zachary, Marlene's two present brothers.

"You really had no idea?" James said in surprise.

"That you dated Jasmine Sempere? No! We've been friends for ages and she never even told me!" Lucas wasn't much older than the marauders, he was in his seventh year when they were in their fifth.
"We played quidditch together!"

"I know, and didn't you both train to be aurors at the same time?" Sirius added, a wicked grin on his face.

"We did! I went to training last year, fancied a change from working abroad– turns out that's more Zach's thing."

Zachary, the oldest McKinnon nodded, "yeah well, my husband lives over in Switzerland and I like it over there."

"How long have you been married to Mateo now?"

"It'll be six years this February."

James whistled, "holy shit."

Zachary blushed, his light brown hair cropped too short to cover his blush and the dreamy look in his eyes.
"Yeah, still no kids though. I thought mum might be expecting us to have them but now Darren and Amira got there first I think we'll be safe for now."

They all laughed, "you don't want kids?" Lucas inquired.

"Yeah I do, but I'm thirty-two, you know? Mateo is thirty, we've got time."

The conversation seemed to drop off after that and Zach excused himself to talk to the Notts.
Quick to take his seat was Marlene, dragging Esme-Leigh and Trudy with her.

"Merry Christmas, girls!" Lucas grinned, "Esme, how long has it been since I last saw you? I swear you get better looking by the day!" He winked at her lightheartedly.

"Oh, please Godric no! I made Esme promise not to flirt with you! Do not flirt with her now!"

Lucas ruffled Esme's hair playfully, "I'm kidding, Marly, you rise to things so easily. That's why winding you up is so delightful!" He then turned to Trudy who was perched on the edge of the chair while Esme-Leigh had settled on the floor with her head nestled happily between Marlene's knees.
"I don't believe we've met? I'm Lucas, Marlene's most attractive brother."

"Chase yourself, Luke!" James scoffed, "that would be me."

"Shut up, you don't count!"

"Sure I do!"

"Oi! Shut it and let Trudy speak!"

Trudy smiled nervously, "nice to meet you, I'm Trudy Nott. I'm dorm-mates with Esme-Leigh and Marlene."

"Well it's a pleasure. What do you lot say to a quick, secret, round of Marauders Dares?"

Sirius gaped, "how do you even know about that game?"

Lucas winked, "me and Marly had a chat this morning, I got all the tears and drama in the space of an hour's rundown. Very informative. Anyway, who's in?"

Trudy glanced behind her to see her parents had finally been cajoled out their travelling robes. She turned back and smiled. Everyone else met her reaction with a round of wicked grins.

Marauders Dares was a simple enough game to those that had played it. A dare was given from one player to another and the rest of the group had to place bets for or against the marauder doing the dare. If the marauder succeeded, they kept the money, if not, the person that gave the dare got to keep it.

"Who's first?" Trudy asked, her Irish accent prominent with unease. She hadn't played before and was known for her contempt with conflict; to her, this game was a disaster waiting to happen.

Sirius grinned, slinging his arm round her shoulders (nearly having to crouch to make it look natural given she was so small), "cheer up, Nott! You'll love it once we get going. The only rule is don't tell Peter and Remus we played without them!"

"I'll go," Marlene squared her shoulders and grinned boisterously, "who's daring me?"

Lucas smirked, "I'll do it. I dare you to spike Stephen's drink with Pepper-Up-Potion from Flea's store cupboard."

James laughed, sarcastically cruel, "easy. McKinnon could do that in her sleep, couldn't you Blondie? Three galleons."

"Four says she can't."

"Lucas you talk a shit game. Have a bit of faith in your sister. Five."

Trudy seemed to lean into the pretence of the game, she shook a lock of short hazelnut hair from her eyes before chiming in, "seven says she's got it in the bag."

Lucas seemed to be impressed, he nodded at her with a look of what was possibly veneration.
"On the assumption that if she gets caught I win?"

"Of course."

"Well then Nott Jr, you've got yourself a deal."

The two parties shook on it and the group gave low heckles to each other. Marlene, however, had played this game long enough to know exactly how this works, now she was playing for Trudy as well as herself (and Sirius guessed she partly just wanted to prove her brother wrong).

They watched her slip out the living room in a mixture of trepidation and regard, trading glances when she came back five minutes later.
She waved the vial at them from behind her back just as she 'accidentally' bumped into her stepfather, nearly toppling his drink.

"Oh merlin! Sorry, Stephen! Let me help clean you up," Marlene was the picture of apologies as she bent down to scorgify the mess she'd made of the carpet. She stood up to clean his trousers then left with one final 'sorry.'

"Well? Am I keeping my seven galleons?"

Marlene smirked, producing an empty vial from her skirt pocket and throwing it with excellent precision at Lucas' eye. "Next time you go easy on me, I'll rip it out!"

"Wow! I thought we were just easing into the game!"

Marlene laughed, "okay fine, why don't you go next then?"

"Give us a dare then."

Sirius almost felt nervous for Lucas, judging by the look of grit determination and malice on his little sister's face, Lucas was not in for an easy ride.

"Okay, I dare you to get Millard and Monty under the mistletoe together. I don't care how you do it, just get it done in under ten."

There were whistles among the small group, some of disbelief, others of pure rapture at the entertainment they were sure was about to unfold.
"Fine, who's counting on me?"

Sirius leant back against the table and cleared the rest of his firewiskey from his glass.
"I'll back you for five."

"I bet six he can't."

"Seven he'll make it."

"Ten he won't!"

"Twelve he'll be fine."

Marlene smirked at Esme-Leigh, who'd made the final call.
"Sold!"

Lucas grinned, "I knew you'd back me, Bisset." Then he drew his wand, keeping it firmly behind his back he levitated the star of the Christmas tree down and into his hand.
No one seemed to notice until he began to make a scene.
"Marlene stole the Christmas star! Flea! Flea!"

"What?! I did no such thing, you filthy bloody liar!"

Millard was closest to the rumpus and he leapt out his seat, just about the same time as Fleamont reached the squabble.
"What's—"

"The star? It's on the tree, silly!" Lucas winked, tipping his glass towards the tree where the star lay glittering as it had before.
"But since you're both here," he paused for dramatic effect, "you might want to look up..."

"FUCK!"

"Ten galleons please, no apology necessary!"

"Piss off!"

"Language children!"

"Oh be quiet and kiss your boss, McQuade!"

"This better be included as overtime in my bloody salary!"

(25th December 1977)

"You'll come round tomorrow, though? Gran always bakes far too much, you know." Alice adored Christmas. Her smile nearly spilled down the phone to Lily.

"Of course I'll be there with bells on. You know how much I love Joyce's cooking!"

"Perfect! Well, merry Christmas, pet! Wish your family a grand one from me, okay?"

"I will. Love you Alice."

"I love you too darling, now go and open some presents!"
The smile on Alice's face remained equally as bright once the line went dead.

"Alice! Are you coming through here?" Her grandmother called from the living room, she could hear the smile on her voice too. Something about Christmas brightened the already sunshiny Fortescue bungalow with a sense of magic.

The living room of their small home was flooded with decorations, the Christmas tree lit up the centre of the room with gold lights, the cynosure of all eyes. There were strings of silver lights around the windows, stockings by the fire and a small pile of presents underneath the tree.

"Nan! You've opened yours already!"

Joyce smiled sheepishly, her rounded glasses slipping down her nose as she regarded Alice with a look that seemed unique to her.
"Just one of them, you were on the phone!"

"But I bought it for you!"

Alice's grandmother nodded, gesturing for her to sit down, "I know, pet. Merry Christmas."

Alice grinned, her smile glittering with a radiance to challenge the Christmas tree.
"Do you at least like your gift? It look me ages to find."

Joyce laughed softly, her white hair caught the twinkling lights and reflected back at her, "of course I do, Alice dear. It's perfect."
Alice had bought her grandmother a small, delicate music box to sit alongside her small army of bootless trinkets that she'd amassed over the years.

Pride surged through Alice at that, feeling much less put out at not having seen her grandmother open it.
Alice was the type of person that took more joy in the act of giving gifts that receiving them. She had a heart made of something soft and lovely, like a sunset or a clear blue sky. Alice thrived off kindness and good nature; the type of girl to go out her way to put others before herself.

Joyce had a smile on her face that suggested she knew all of this, and there was something else in her eye that bit Alice with the desire to discover what it was about.
Her grandmother motioned to the gift left under the tree, wrapped in paper and tied with brown string.
"Go on, dear," she coaxed, leaning forward in her chair as Alice reached for the package.

Inside was a sapphire necklace, shaped like a teardrop, catching the light off all the decorations and winking at her illicitly.
"Gran—"

"It used to be mine, you know? I wore it the day I married your grandad. Your mother wore it the day she married your father too." Alice's grandmother didn't talk about her daughter much. Both her parents had died when Alice was young, too young to really remember them at all, but sometimes when she was little, Joyce would tell her stories of them both; of how in love they used to be, of how much they loved Alice, but as she'd got older, the stories had begun to fade away. She usually found she didn't mind, she had her grandmother, and that felt like enough, but whenever Joyce mentioned her mother, even just in passing, a swelling of emotion would swirl through her. She'd only ever known memories of her mother, but holding this necklace in her hands made her feel as close to her as she ever had.

"Thank you," her voice was a whisper, but Joyce heard as clear as day.

"Wear it with pride, pet."

♥ ♥ ♥

(25th December 1977 continued)

Christmas overflowed with magic, not the same sort that Lily was used to, but magic all the same. The tree glittered with lights and baubles, even brighter now, as if it knew its purpose was to radiate something wonderful; the snow outside glistened in the winter sun as well, casting strips of rainbow light along the white walls and adorning the picture frames with something similar. Everything seemed to glow at Christmas and Lily found herself making a conscious effort not to glow along with it.

Lily and Petunia had remained civil while exchanging gifts, serenaded by Christmas music from the wireless in the corner of the room, playing cheesy Christmas music, one might even go as far as saying they were enjoying the others company.
Christmas seemed to be the only time of year that Petunia forgot how much she despised her little sister, the resentment she felt towards her seemed to dissipate with the click of her slender, manicured fingers. It often sparked a wonder in Lily why she couldn't behave like this all the time, but she didn't wish to be rapacious with Petunia's affections.

It had felt like their evening was winding down when Petunia approached her, they'd eaten dinner, sang carols and entertained a visit from their lovely neighbours and their ebullient daughter Siran.

"Lily?"

She turned to see her sister behind her, hand still outstretched from where she'd tapped Lily on the shoulder.

"Yes?" Her voice was too buoyant. Lily imagined she sounded like a child, acting delusory, setting herself up for an impressive failure.

"I've got something for you," Petunia handed Lily a gift wrapped in red paper and Lily felt her eyes welling with tears.

Lily smiled, "I've got something for you too but I didn't know if you'd want it. It's upstairs just now, in my bedroom."

Petunia gave her sister a half smile, but it was more than Lily had ever asked for, because it was the first genuine smile she'd gotten from her sister in longer than she'd dared to recount. Hardly three months ago, Petunia had declared that she hated her sister, and blamed her magic on their mother's drinking. And now a half smile felt like the patchwork on her broken heart.

"Open it, then," Petunia coaxed, not sounding anywhere near as malicious as the words should have sounded on her lips, how they usually sounded on her lips.

Lily couldn't contain her grin, looking away from her sister for a moment to unwrap the gift. Behind the wrapping paper was a delicate hairpiece, decorated with wildflowers.

"I know how much you loved flowers when we were children and..." she trailed off. Not wishing to voice the next part.
What Petunia didn't say was how much of Lily's magic had come from wildflowers, how she'd been able to revive them in her hand and make them grow from almost nothing. Wildflowers were a part of Lily as much as her arms or legs and Petunia had remembered.

"It's perfect, really, perfect."

Lily's sister blushed, the first time she'd ever done so in Lily's company.
"I need to tell you something else."

"Anything."

"I said I hated you that day. But I don't– hate you. Not really."

Lily's heart stopped beating. It almost felt like the silence that had plagued their doleful and idle house had returned, except this time a debilitating sense of euphoria was embedding in her heart, blossoming like the wildflowers she held in her hand.

"Thank you," she choked, her words barely audible but they tasted like hope and felicity on her tongue.

Petunia shook her head in dismissal, her own smile was barely there but Lily could feel it.
"I'll go and get your gift," Lily announced, coughing the shyness out of her voice.

She hurried up to her bedroom, bursting in the door and finally allowing herself to fully revel in her delight. As soon as the door was closed, Lily's back slid down it until she was on the floor, her head in her hands attempting to catch the gasps of glee escaping her.

Every year since Lily was eleven she had bought her sister a Christmas gift. Every year since she was eleven Petunia hadn't. That was until today.

Lily's wardrobe had amassed a small pile of gifts that she hadn't given to her sister, they would sit in one of her shelves innocuously, perhaps slightly torturously until such a time as Lily brung herself to throw them out or give one to Petunia.
She selected the newest present and handed it to her sister (who had walked in the room while Lily searched). Petunia have her another smile as she gingerly unwrapped the gift.

Inside the gift box was a thick, purple, glass necklace, in the shape of a chain.
"I know you've been looking for a necklace to match that blouse of yours so I thought—"

"—it's perfect."

Lily paused, barely believing her ears, convinced they were deceiving her.
"Y-you?..."

"I love it, Lily... thank you."

The air smelt like pine-needles and hope as Lily threw her arms around her sister, encasing her in a hug close enough to feel swallowed by Petunia's scent of mint and vanilla.
They stayed like that in the middle of Lily's bedroom for a moment that might have been a year before Petunia broke away.

"We should go back downstairs, dad will insist we watch a Christmas movie."

Lily nodded, "you go and I'll be two seconds. Tell dad that I'm not coming unless we watch It's a Wonderful Life!"

"He'll probably put on Meet Me In St Louis and claim they're the same thing."

"Make sure that doesn't happen. I watched that last week with Alice and Frank."

Petunia actually laughed then, the sound rang like Zuzu's Angel bells in It's a Wonderful Life, filling Lily up like rich hot chocolate.
"Alright, don't be long."

Petunia closed the door behind her and Lily let out a breath, too exultant to be confused by having such a normal conversation with her sister.
However Lily promised she would be a few minutes and so she spent them gazing out the window onto the street below.

Potter House seemed abnormally busy but no cars were parked in the drive, they must have caught a bus. Through the half pulled curtains, it was clear a small party seemed to be in full swing, silhouettes chatted amiably and danced to music Lily could not hear.

Standing by one of the burgundy curtains was James, next to an almost comically petite girl Lily hadn't seen before. The two were regarding each other awkwardly, she almost wondered why until they literally looked up with trepidation and it was clear they were under mistletoe.

They were still giggling as James bowed his head to place a chaste, sweet kiss to the girl's lips. Lily was about to look away, an unexplainable need to make all her feelings stop nearly managed to tear her eyes away until she noticed the pair were fake-gagging as soon as their lips had disconnected. This made Lily laugh and she chose to focus on that laughter over the overwhelming sense of relief.

She watched for a few more moments, seeing the occasional glance at what might have been Sirius and Remus spinning under each other's arms and another blonde boy play-fighting with Marlene.

The house was the picture of serenity. The sort of domestic content that Lily could only dream of in a distant land where magic didn't exist. Dreaming of a normal life left like an oxymoron for more than one reason, one might even call it counterproductive considering her rancour to all things pedestrian. But, of course, there was a darkness hanging over their party, much like there would always be one hanging over hers. Nothing was ever as blissful as the eye could see, Potter House was still haunted by the absence of Euphemia Potter; Lily imagined that a day like Christmas was exceptionally difficult. And Lily's home would always be haunted by the silence, by the grey fog and smell of her mother's alcohol...

She supposed everyone had a darkness, something eerie and looming that seeped into the corners of every instance in which one could be incandescently happy. Instead they are faced with the darkness.
Or perhaps that was what pulled her towards James, the cloud they shared, the broken heart they both carried, buried, in their chests, cracked but guarded like a chipped china doll placed in a glass case, protecting what no longer needed protection.

It was a few moments before she managed to tear her eyes away from the scene she saw in Potter House, finding a fond smile at the corner of her mouth, as if shy to escape.

Lily and James both had dark clouds, but that didn't mean they weren't allowed to pretend them away every now and again. Just because the darkness existed did not mean one has to exist in it permanently. So, she allowed that smile to spread fully onto her face as she raced back down the stairs into the living room of her house. Sometimes one is allowed to smile, to watch, to allow the protection to fall. You can dance, you can kiss a friend under mistletoe, you can give a gift. A darkness doesn't have to be a bad thing all the time, Lily was determined to prove it.

Her family were curled on the sofa, Petunia closest to the window; her mother in between Petunia her father; and there was a space for Lily next to Martin.

"This better not be Meet Me in St. Louis!" Lily chided as she unceremoniously dipped down onto the couch, resting her head on her fathers shoulder as the opening credits of a black & white film began to roll.

"I convinced him against it. Although I'm not sure what you're holding out against St. Louis?"

"I saw it with Alice and Frank last week."

"We'll you'll be glad that your sister convinced me to play It's a Wonderful Life."

The feeling that seeped into every vein, every capillary of Lily's body felt like it was made of honey. It was something incomparable, something that she had desperately chased after for years. To have her sister on her side –even if it was about a Christmas flick one day a year– seemed worth bearing the darkness for. Somehow it was worth the cracked heart...

Clarence the Angel had just found his way onto the screen when Martin offered Faith his glass of wine.
"It's Christmas," he said with a reassuring smile.

But Faith shook her head, "I won't ruin today."

At the soft words Lily felt her eyes brim with tears, she might have been able to play it off as emotions surrounding the film as Zuzu had just given George her flower (a scene that always seemed to catch Lily off guard, no matter how many times she watched the film); however she shortly realised this was not an option when her skin began glowing.
Without another word, Lily fled to the hall, not wishing to upset her sister or any of her family by glowing with happiness.

Magic had felt like a curse for most of her life, and now was no different but it was hard not to see another side to it when angels sat on the opposite sides of television screens. Her skin pulsed with a steady glow for a few more beats. Lily counted until they went back down, the majesty of such a thing not quite lost on her by its inconvenience.

It hasn't taken long for the pulsing to stop and her freckled skin to return to its natural state.
And when she padded back in, slipping back under her fathers arm she wondered if angels like Clarence really did exist. And if so, did they have darkness too?

"Teacher says, every time a bell rings, an Angel gets his wings!" Zuzu recited on the television screen, which Lily could only see through tear clouded eyes.

In her head Lily finished the iconic line to her favourite Christmas film, "atta boy, Clarence."

Everything felt perfect. It felt like a wonderful life...

(25th December 1977)

Remus and Peter had barely appeared in the chimney when a silvery rag doll cat patronus came prancing into the middle of the room.

"The baby's been born!" Came Darren's voice through the charm, his usual lacklustre, businesslike tone swapped for one of pure astonishment and wonder.
"Amira and the baby are fine. It's a girl but we want to tell you her name in person, we'll see you later!"

Almost immediately after Darren McKinnon's voice faded, his patronus faded with it, leaving the room with one beat of thin silence before it erupted into excited applause. Marlene jumped into Stephen's arms; Zachary embraced his mother; and Lucas found himself wrapped up in a crushing hug from James and Remus.

The announcement of the baby only seemed like more cause for celebration. Fleamont brought out a bottle of brandy that he explained he'd been saving for a special occasion, Esme-Leigh found a new record for everyone to dance to, and the Notts were once more convinced to have another drink.

No-one was expecting Darren to walk out of the fireplace, his face flushed but more radiant than a Christmas cherub.
Marlene spotted him first.

"Darren!" She ran up to him, holding him fast and ruffling his usually pristine, refined dark brown hair. He smelt something like hospitals and something innocent.

"I came to get you guys, Amira wanted you to meet the baby before the end of the day."

Felicity McKinnon was onto him with a flash, pulling him into a hug of her own.
"I'm so bloody proud of you, son. None of us could have hoped for a better Christmas gift!"

"Neither could I, mum. Do you want to come with me? I'll apparate?"

"I'll just say goodbye to the Notts first," Felicity shot her son a winning smile but it was clear there were tears of happiness trailing down her cheeks.

The Notts weren't long away home (with Millard McQuade not long at their backs) by the time the McKinnons and Esme-Leigh were ready to set off.

"Merry Christmas, Monty," Marlene hugged Fleamont tightly, then Sirius, Remus, Peter and James in turn.

"I'll write you her name," she assured James before stepping back and disappearing with a crack.

The remaining people in the room watched the place the McKinnons just left from for a few moments like lost puppies until Fleamont clapped his hands.
"Right, shift yourselves. It's well after twelve and your mothers will be running riot if I keep you here any longer on Christmas!"

"Thank you for having us round all the same, Fleamont," Remus smiled, stepping towards the fireplace but the man in question had already disappeared into the other room, leaving the marauders alone together.

Sirius smirked as he surveyed the scene.
"Don't go anywhere, Moony I'm coming with. You can't stop me, I'm just going to get something from upstairs I won't be a second," then he was gone, leaving the air with a hint of secrecy and the lingering smell of leather and cigarette smoke.

James watched his friend go, leaning nonchalantly on the drinks cabinet, arms crossed over a dark green jumper.
"I would ask you boys to stay, have another drink with me, but I'm a bit pissed already and I've got one more thing to do before I go to bed, so if you lads wouldn't mind."

Peter shook his head, "my mum wanted me back anyway. We usually have hot chocolate together before we go to bed on Christmas Day anyway."

"Tell Miss Pettigrew I'm asking after her, will you?"

Peter nodded, "will do. I'll see you sometime soon, lads? Send us an owl." And with a final sparkling grin he was gone.

Sirius chose his moment to slip back into the room, still wearing his signature delectable smirk as he slipped his hand into Remus'.
"Take us home, Moony, my boy!"

"Oi!"

"Sorry Prongs."

"Forget about it. Just don't do anything I wouldn't do."

Remus raised a deft eyebrow, "there is nothing you wouldn't do."

"My point exactly. Now begone and leave me in peace!"

"Merry Christmas, Prongs."

Sirius and James shared a look of understanding that too any outsider would have been impossible to interpret. A thousand things could be said in the space of a look with Sirius and James. In a glance, Sirius could convey every way in which he was grateful to have his best friend, especially at Christmas when he was his happiest.

"Merry Christmas, Padfoot, Moony."

Remus saluted James and then the two of them were gone, leaving him alone in peace. James might have found himself terrible company if there weren't an empty glass and his fathers bottle of brandy open on the table, and he still had one more thing to take care of before he went to sleep...

♣ ♣ ♣

(26th December 1977)

It was barely one in the morning when Sirius and Remus found themselves back where they started at the beginning of the day.

This time on Christmas Eve, Sirius was at his window, begging for an adventure. Now he realised he'd gotten one, and it had landed him back here.

"How was the adventure?" Remus asked is if he could read his mind.

"Ample yes, decent company."

"Decent?! Do me a favour! Brandy makes me knackered."

"Well, then I see no reason why we shouldn't submit to the wiles of a blanket clad bed."

Remus was smirking.

"What?"

"Who knew Sirius Black would want to sleep over doing something exciting."

Sirius shrugged. "Sometimes the moment calls for subtlety."

"Right you are," Remus gestures towards the bed, landing on one of the pillows with an unceremonious thump. Sirius crawled under the cover to join him once he'd shrugged off his leather jacket.

"Merry Christmas, Moony."

But Remus was already asleep, and so Sirius found himself lying awake, watching the ceiling. A letter was in his hand, sealed in a crisp white envelope, no wax stamp. He'd gone to retrieve it from his bedroom before he left with Remus.

It had been years since Sirius had heard directly from his brother, but the handwriting was still distinctly recognisable.

Sirius,

Mother doesn't know you're holding this letter, I write this by candlelight on Christmas Eve while the house sleeps.
I hope this letter has found you safe and happy and I know you think I'm a fool for not leaving with you but you know it's not that simple for me. Perhaps if I were a Ravenclaw like you thought I might have been when we were little, then I might have been able to leave with you. But Slytherin house has a way of encasing its members.

Regardless, I want you to know I'm alright, I can handle myself now thanks to your help. There's no need to worry about me.

Merry Christmas, spend it with your family, the one you deserve more than ours.

Until another time,
Regulus

♣ ♣ ♣

(26th December 1977 continued)

Dear James,

You won't believe what they've called her: Jaya Marlene McKinnon-Bedi!!! THEY NAMED HER AFTER ME PRONGS!

You have to come and see her, mate! She's so bloody cute, I actually cried– which is very embarrassing but I don't mind telling you because I know for a fact that you'll cry too when you meet her because she's gorgeous and you're a sap (I won't apologise for the truth).

Anyway, I'll see you later, give the boys and Monty my love?

Marlene McKinnon (an AUNTIE now!!!)

James was putting the letter down on his desk when he saw a light flicker on across the street. Lily's bedroom light was dim, but it stood out against the dark street like headlights on a country road.

He saw her red hair shift around her room for a moment before she came to face the window, looking out onto the street, as if she were looking for something and became worried when she found the pavement vacant.

Now he could see her, it was hard not to be reminded of the boy from the cafe, the one he saw her kiss on the garden path. The memory cut him like a knife, splitting him almost in two. But that would have been a mercy.

He knew he had no right to feel so hurt. Lily had the right to do as she pleased, but something still bothered him, something he tried hard to push deep down in his chest. He was jealous.

It was at that moment Lily saw him, she began waving madly, meeting James with aliminesant smile he could feel from a distance.
She was gesticulating wildly, her figure bouncing up and down in bubbly delight by the window. It took him an embarrassing amount of time to realise she was asking him to come round.

James glanced at his watch, it was past one but he was rarely asleep at this time anyway, and the brandy he'd drunk seemed to be going to his head now, swirling around his body like felix felicis.
He grabbed the gift wrapped on his desk and clambered out his window without another thought.

(26th December 1977)

James landed in her bedroom like a cat, silent as the night around them. She didn't notice the package in his hand until he held it out to her, a lopsided grin plastered on his face like a smug child that had won a prize.
"Is it too late to say Merry Christmas?"

Something about James delighted her more than she'd imagined it would. The first time she met James, the first thing she'd thought was that she detested him. That he was pompous, and arrogant, and unpleasant. But she looked at him now, grinning at her like she was the most wonderful thing he'd ever seen, and she realised how wrong she had been. Maybe it was the Christmas spirit but to her, James seemed like the type of boy she might fall in love with.

"Never too late," Lily smiled, taking the surprisingly heavy gift and feeling her arm strain slightly to take on the adjusted weight. "Thank you."

He was looking at her, a ghost of something resembling nerves on his face. James Potter nervous?

"What's got you smirking, Lily Simpson?"

Simpson. She was beginning to detest the name she'd given herself but it didn't stop her smirking.

"You."

"Me?"

"You look nervous."

The word 'nervous' seemed to be a trigger word in James' body because as soon as it left her lips, his air of debonair had returned; his resident grin spread across his lips, his arms folded across his chest as he leant back against her bookshelf like he belonged there.

"Nervous?"

Lily had to look away before he caught her blushing. He looked rather beautiful when he was at ease; like everything in the world was under his control and he was itching to prove it. For the first time, Lily wondered if nervous was an emotion James even knew? He took up space like he owned it, all messy curls, broad shoulders and devastating, heart-leaping smirks.

"You going to oggle me or open it, love? As much as I adore the way you look at me like you want to kiss me– you really should open the gift first."

Lily's mouth fell open and James laughed softly, deviously. One could have cut a slice of the air ate it with tea, Lily imagined it would taste like dark chocolate and embarrassment.

Without comment, Lily unwrapped the gift, carefully avoiding ripping the paper. A gasp escaped her lips before she could stop it. Inside the parcel was a vintage camera that looked like money. It gleamed silver in the amber lamplight, tinting her room with the colour of whiskey and romance.

"I know you have about three different cameras but I've seen how much you love Alice's vintage typewriter and I thought—"

"James!"

"What?"

"I love it," she set the camera down onto her bed and pulled James into a hug, desperately hoping that when she pulled away it wouldn't be raining glitter or that the tears in her eyes weren't sunbeams. Her magic might have ruined something so perfect, but it was impossible not to feel it swelling in her stomach.

"Oh... well I'm glad."
Lily grinned at the sound of his voice muffled in her hair.

"I've got something for you too."

She felt the absence of his arms around her almost immediately, instead he bent down to catch her eyes, his own mischievous and shimmering hazel.
"Oh yeah?"

Lily nodded, tearing herself away from those hypnotic eyes to pull a photo album off the shelf behind him.
"I made this, it's got everyone in it. They're mostly my pictures but some as Alice's."

Wonder replaced confidence as James took the album out of Lily's hands.
"Do you mind if we look at it together? You can talk me through it."

It was late, Lily had drank enough wine to feel airy and there was a faint aroma of brandy on James' jumper. But perhaps that was all the more reasons that compelled her to say yes.

They sat in her bed, curled together as intimately as they'd ever been before, flicking through each page and sharing memories of the days they were taken.

There was a picture of Sirius, having fallen into the river, drunk last summer. A shot of Alice, Marlene and Dorcas all with matching flowers in their hair. There was a picture of Remus and Esme-Leigh dancing at one of the various pubs they'd been barred from. But Lily's favourite, and the picture she was worried most about James seeing was on the final page...

The picture was taken by Alice and Lily hadn't any idea she'd taken it until a few weeks ago when she's asked if Alice had any pictures that might go well in the album. The picture was of Lily and James together, lying side by side at the skatepark, legs dangling over the side of the ramp, hands linked and looking up at the breathtakingly orange, watercolour sky.
Alice had told her she'd seen the two at the skatepark, the first time James had ever come to see her during term, sneaking off to make sure Lily was alright; but what Alice didn't mention was that she'd taken a picture of the two of them. But it was perfect. It reminded Lily of the day she realised she could be invincible, and that someone believed in her.

"I didn't know Alice saw this..." James whispered, a look in his eye that she couldn't quite place, it was intriguing, alluring.

"Me neither, she told me afterwards but not that she had a picture."

"Oh..." he paused, eyes transfixed on the photograph, as if it held the answer to anything he'd ever wanted to know.

Finally, slowly, almost innocently he met her eyes and it felt like she was seeing him for the first time.
"James..."

"Yeah?"

He was closer than he ought to be, Lily might just combust if he wasn't closer.

"James... I'd like to kiss you now, if that's alright?"

The blacks of his eyes seemed to swell, swimming in the seas of forest greens and molten golds.
"It's alright, but Lily?"
Her breath was shallow, barely there. Her heart felt like it might stop any second.
"What about that boy from the cafe? I saw you kiss him."

Lily sat up closer to him, drinking him in through liquidated eyes. One of her hands was resting on the warm skin of his cheek, the other was laid flat on his chest. Their noses were almost touching, he was close enough to kiss by accident.

"He was pretending to be my boyfriend. My... my family thought I had a boyfriend because I'd spent so long sneaking out to see you, Christian works with me, we're...friends." Her whispers felt laboured as she let them slip from her mouth, burning the back of her throat. They tasted a dark shade of purple, like anticipation.

"Why didn't you ask me?"

Lily could feel his heartbeat, fluttering faster than she could count.

Beat, beat beat... Beat, beat, beat...

"I don't know, I think all the wine I've drunk and the being so close to you has made me a little mad."

Beat, beat, beat... Beat, beat, beat...

James' breath hitched, Lily felt it surround her, the smell of brandy was consuming, the wonder of what it might taste like on his lips was overpowering, maddening...
"'There is always some madness in love–"

"But there is also some reason in madness.'" Lily finished, their breath mingling, a cocktail of alcohol and something sweet, tender.

"Friedrich Nietzsche," James breathed, his arm around her waist, his thumb drawing calming circles on her hip.

"Yeah..." Lily could have sworn her heart was going to give out when she kissed him. He tasted like brandy, cigarettes and magic, he smelt just the same.
James reached up his other hand to gently run his knuckles along her collarbone, across the necklace he'd bought her with the small golden ball.

His kiss was soft, tempting, hypnotic. It felt like the introduction to something wonderful. She didn't dare deepen their kiss, afraid of ruining the delicate romance they'd created for themselves, it felt fragile.

They broke apart for air, still as close as they had been before, their foreheads resting on each other and their hearts and minds reeled. Everything was spinning apart from him.

"Will you stay with me? Just for the night?"

The corner of his mouth turned up, his soft lips forming a smile.
"I'll stay as long as you want, love."

They lay their heads on Lily's pillow, watching each other, consumed by something much larger them themselves. They didn't kiss again, afraid they'd ruin the first one, but just seeing each other so close, holding each other. It was more than enough.

Later, when James was asleep and the first tendrils of morning were seeping through the curtains, Lily watched his peaceful face and wondered if it would last? If this perfect, romantic sanctuary would would burst like a delicate bubble and leave them both separate again? The idea seemed to equate to losing a part of her heart. Was that what he was?

James' breathing was soft, steady. His presence reassuring. If they would have to leave, it wasn't now, so she could fall back asleep safe, with him.

She hadn't seen Lucifer when she'd looked out onto the street, she'd seen James instead. Now she thought about it: Lucifer hadn't been waiting for her in a while. Perhaps he wasn't coming back?

She slipped back into sleep, steady breathing filling her heart like a warm drink, keeping her safe until morning.

A smile was on her face. It's a wonderful life...

JILY KISS GUYSSSSS!! This wasn't supposed to be a jily kiss but I had the idea and couldn't get it out of my head! Props to WiseRavenclaw07 for telling me to go for it. I told her I was debating changing the plot a little bit and she told me to do it so everyone thank her! (and read her jilytober book!)

Also the McKinnon brothers and Darren's fiancée have all been added to the side characters chapter of this book, check them out if you're curious!

Finally, a quick apology for it being so long since I've updated- Jilytober was taking up my priority (Press Pause if you want to check it out) but it's here now!

Thanks for reading!

Love you all,
Abbi♥️