https://youtu.be/q31tGyBJhRY

Dancing On My Own - Calum Scott

Jimin

I was rushing out of class to go and change for football practice. Taehyung would kill me if not for anything else than for hogging Jungkook's time. In my fourth year, I was used to the strict schedule, but I was a bit worried about Jungkook, who was juggling many things. Perhaps Taehyung was right and I shouldn't have encouraged him to audition. It was too late now that the committee had frothing to their mouth after seeing Jungkook's caliber. They wouldn't let him back down easily.

Would that adamant boy even want to take a step back?

Jungkook and Tae still weren't speaking. I couldn't give Jungkook the benefit of the doubt that his interest in me was gone. Taehyung was waiting for Jungkook to make his move first this time, so I planned to change a few things around.

The moment I entered the field, Taehyung shrugged disapprovingly and pointed at his Apple watch. I waved a hand and indicated at the locker room. I only needed five minutes to go and change. My eyes fell on Jungkook right before I barged in.

I practically shoved my formal clothes in my bag and put on a jersey with knee-length shorts. The summer had arrived, but it wasn't like Korea. The temperature reached balmy degrees and it was always pleasant to carry a light summer jacket. All of us would still be sweating like pigs by the end of the practice.

Done with a wardrobe change, I beelined towards the Captain, Wolfgang. "You are late. Again!" He shrieked. 

"Stop screaming. You'll give yourself a heart attack." I grinned and slapped Taehyung's rear, suggesting to start the practice. 

The still-glaring captain whistled towards Christoph, who was also in a similar outfit to mine, but with an addition of a headband. He kicked the ball towards another boy on the team and then it was ambush.

It was us and the fifth years, but we played like every other person on the field was the enemy. Taehyung was the most ruthless.

I got the ball and from my defense position, I could take a shot, but then I gauged Jungkook's position and Taehyung ahead of him.

My strategy took a few seconds and in that time, I was swarmed by the seniors. I screamed Jungkook's name and passed the ball to him.

He panicked a little when the tall and some even bearded seniors shifted attack towards him. My job was done. I was itching to scream at him to pass the ball to Taehyung, but I stayed back, breathing hard and watching Jungkook regain focus.

He was trying to get out of the web that the seniors had put around him. Taehyung was running, but he wasn't calling Jungkook's name.

Everyone on our team was watching with nail-biting anxiety.

Overworn by nerves, Taehyung finally hollered. "Over here, Jungkook!"

That encouraged the youngest of our team to push the ball to Taehyung and the moment my friend got hold of it, he kicked it so hard that the goalie went flying through the net.

Everyone roared in celebration and Taehyung rushed to Jungkook and ruffled his hair before picking him up in a celebratory stance. Jungkook grinned at the attention and his eyes searched around.

When he spotted me, he pushed down on Taehyung's shoulders to release him and ran towards me. I patted his head, too. "Good job."

Jungkook

After days, Jimin texted me to meet him in the parking area. It was almost dinner time, but food wasn't important. With spring in my steps, I gaited to the all too familiar ground.

On seeing the blue car, I broke into a jog.

Weeks were passing like days. It had been a month and a half since our new semester started and we returned from holidays, but it felt like only a few days had gone by. At this rate, I was worried I would devour all six years and it would be soon time to return home or think about the future.

My schedule started with me waking up at five and then studying for an hour before going swimming for another hour. By the time I returned, it was time for classes.

After classes ended at two in the afternoon, I had lunch with Ulrich, rested for some time, and then got ready to do a group study session. It was two of us some days, and some days I dragged Ulrich to to seniors' dormitory.

By five in the evening, I was on the football field, practicing for a good one hour. Then I scheduled for light dinner. Late in the evening, we had dance practice three times a week.

The last time I said something vaguely flirtatious to Jimin was the night of our dance audition. Ever since he went back to his shell again. I was hopeless. I tried to think of ways to pull him out of his cocoon again, but every time I so much as expressed a pint, he ran for hills.

I was frantic that I'd be unable to make any progress. Despite the amount of activities I was managing, the worry of how to express my feelings without Jimin running away was the most stressful thing. But on the flip side, I was seeing less of Rosenow with Jimin. At least that saved my blood from boiling too much. He must've seen me from inside because he got out of the car and closed the door behind him. "Hey." He smiled.

It was a simple greeting, but it fluttered my heart to a maniac rhythm when I saw his smile. "Hi, Hyung."

"How was your day?"

"The usual," I shrugged. "What about you?"

"You know," he shrugged, too. "Also the usual."

I laughed softly. "Did you eat?"

"Not yet. I was thinking of eating with the girls tonight. Rose is coming over with Anja."

"Oh," I tried hard to fake that I was happy for him, but my facial muscles gave up. "Why did you call me?" My voice came out even and timid.

"Listen," he shifted on his feet. I knew where he was going before he said anything. "I know I have no right to tell you what to do with your life."

"You can," I cut him off. "I value you a lot, Hyung, in case you didn't know. I would listen to you if you ask of me something." I wanted to drive my point home, even if what he was going to say was not what I wanted to hear.

He looked surprised but then his features softened. "Taehyung is your senior, Jungkook. You might not know it..."

Don't say it. Don't say it. 

"...but he cares about you a lot."

He didn't say it, but he might as well have with how he looked at me like I knew all along and he wasn't sure if I was fooling him or myself. 

 When he realized I wasn't fazed by the revelation, he continued, maybe wanting to say it in clearer words. "I am not going to ask you for anything you don't want to do. But this silent war between you two has gone too far. People on the team can see the tension between you. They are talking. He is also the team co-captain. If not for any other reason, I think you have to show him respect simply because he deserves it."

"But I do respect him." I countered.

"I know you do, but you need to go and talk to him. You know he would do it for you, but it's different this time. It also gets uncomfortable for me when both of you are in my room and not talking to each other."

"You are right," I told him. If my actions made him uncomfortable, I would do anything to correct that. Besides, he was right about being respectful to Taehyung Hyung. "I will talk to him."

"Thanks." Jimin beamed.

"Don't say that," I smiled. Sadness followed my steps when we started heading back to the building. I wanted to spend some more time with him. 

"When will you talk to him?" He asked.

"Tonight."

"Why not now?" He pushed. 

"Now?" I halted, craning my neck to look at him.

He jutted his chin towards my phone. "Call him. You don't have dance practice tonight. You have time to make up and put differences away." 

Was that it? Was this his way of killing all my hopes once and for all?

"Okay," I bit my bottom lip hard, hiding the nervous wobbling of my chin. 

When I dialed Hyung's number, Jimin patted my shoulder in a friendly gesture and began to walk backward before finally turning and getting away.

I gripped the phone with brute force, my heart beating. "Hello?" His heavy voice pierced through my disappointment, images of Jimin and Rose forming in my head. "Hello, Jungkook. Is everything okay?"

"Em... Yeah, Hyung. I- Can we talk?"

"What is it?"

"Not like this. Can I see you?"

"Sure. Have you eaten?" He asked.

"No," I answered, my eyes tearing up as Jimin took a turn to his dorm wing and disappeared.

"Do you want to ditch the Uni food and get some pizza? My treat."

At that moment, I wondered how would I break Taehyung Hyung's heart. I wanted to eat with Jimin, but I wasn't his priority, and on the other hand, even when Taehyung Hyung was angry, he asked me out for dinner.

It wasn't about dinner. What Jimin was doing to me, I was doing to Taehyung Hyung. "Thanks, Hyung. I am outside."

Taehyung

I took the quickest shower in the history of showers. To save time, I wore my clothes on wet skin without drying myself and sprinted not to make Jungkook wait for long.

When I reached the parking, I slowed down not to seem desperate. He waved at me from a distance and I smiled after inching closer. "I was surprised to get your call." 

"I should've called you sooner."

"Come on," I grabbed his wrist and aimed towards the exit. "We can talk while eating."

"Are we walking?" He asked.

"We can take the train. The pizza place is right down the next station from here," I opened the app to check the train timing. There was one leaving in five minutes. "Do you have a travel card on you?"

"On my phone," he lifted the device to show me.

"Do you mind running?" I hated that my head was short-circuited. I should have stopped by Jimin's room to get the car keys. And once I saw Jungkook, I didn't want to go back. Now, we were running while laughing. At least, it broke the tension.

The moment we reached the platform, the train was ready to depart. 

I let Jungkook take the window side. My hand instinctively went behind his seat protectively. "So," now that we took back some oxygen in our lungs, I initiated the conversation. "What happened to us?"

"Hyung," he took a shallow breath, looking ahead as if to simplify his thoughts. "First of all, I am sorry. I shouldn't have acted immaturely. It was rude of me to stop talking to you."

"Why did you stop talking to me?" I wiped my mouth to stifle my smile, but it didn't help my case.

Jungkook looked down in his lap as he fidgeted with his fingers. Docile Jungkook did things to my organs I rather wouldn't have preferred to prioritize at that moment. "I don't like it when anyone tells me what to do. I guess- my father always decided for me and it's not like I am still briny about it, but - God! Why am I talking about it?"

"Hey," I held his shoulder in assurance. "It's okay. If you want, you can talk to me."

But then the train stopped and we had to pause. I guided him out and the topic changed easily as we got out of the station and entered the pizzeria.

The owner saluted me when I entered and I greeted him in German. Jungkook did the same before we navigated through the crowded place. He preferred sitting on the table by the wall to a table by the window.

I didn't object. Once comfortable, I gave him the menu and asked him to order for the table, anything he wanted.

He chose Carbonara and Pollo pizza for me with two beers. After the server took our order, I pulled my seat closer to him and asked him in a soft voice. "You were telling me that you don't like when people dictate you to do things."

"I don't," he replied honestly. I fucking loved the guts of this kid.

"And you felt that I crossed that line?" I asked sincerely.

"Twice."

"Twice?" My eyes widened.

"Once when I was trying to set up the fundraiser."

"By selling your half-naked pictures." My eyebrows raised to pierce the point.

"I get it. Trust me, I do. It was stupid. But it was my idea nonetheless. You snatched away my camera and didn't even apologize for it, and then about the dance auditions... I know you were worried my performance would affect football, but maybe you could've articulated it in a better way?"

"I agree," No. I didn't stop him because of the reason he cited, I was worried it would be too much for him and that I would get less time to spend with him. It wasn't like he was taking any of my hints. I wanted to have more time to ease him into the idea. I understood it could be a lot if I propositioned that we dated, and that was why I was going slow.

Like right at the moment, I wanted to say that I didn't give a damn about football, but I sensed the distress he was trying to hide. It wasn't the right time to be open about my feelings.

"I am sorry, too, Jungkook. I am fiercely protective of people I care about. But I got your point. I will take it down a notch."

For all the things that could've happened, Jungkook breaking into tears was not even on the hundredth place of my guess list. I had to check twice to ensure that he was really crying.

Then I pulled him into me and hugged him. "Shhh... Whatever it is. I promise you it's going to be alright. I am with you. Okay? I am here for you."

Instead of being consoled, he only cried harder. And I knew, it wasn't just about me — or what I presumed — about his father.

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12 Aug, 2024