11

Kriya

It was Sunday and I entered Taani's party. As it turned out, Swayam did allow me to go. Only on the condition that he'd be coming as well. I had no problem with that. It'd be better to have someone I could talk to when there; was what I thought. I didn't know who all would be there other than Hannah and Caroline. And I very well knew that both of my friends loved parties and they'd be at the dance floor instead of sticking away from it with me.

"W-o-w." I exclaimed seeing how crazy the party was. I was sure Taani didn't know half of the people present there. It was at her farm house. Near the pool, half the people were there. The others were either getting drunk or dancing intimately on the dance floor. It was new to me, but then again, I assume this is how college parties are like. Wild. Utterly wild. I was already starting to regret. Why did I want to come in the first place? It could be since it was the first time Taani actually talked to me?

"Kriya! You made it." Taani rushed from behind. She seemed a bit tipsy from her over-excitement already. And the wine glass in her hand was proof of it. "Oh, okay." I muttered when receiving a hug from her. Not expected. Yeah, it's the alcohol making her act this way.

"And you must be that 'someone'." Taani looped her arms around Swayam and already pulling us towards the middle of the party.

"She's-crazy!" Swayam mouthed to me and received a slap on his upper arm from me along with a glare.

"Guys, look! Kriya's here!" Taani announced to Roy and his friends. Roy grinned, and then looked towards Swayam. He gave him a nod, and Swayam replied back with one as well, but it wasn't as friendly as it had been yesterday.

What changed in a day? I had to ask Swayam. I couldn't right now, since Taani pulled me away forcefully to introduce me to her friends leaving Swayam with the boys. "Rose, Melanie, Natalie and Jiyah, say hi to Kriya. And Kriya, my friends."

They all passed smiled around, which I could tell were fake. I had a lot of that from Sharon and her friends. Even mines was. I found myself questioning why I had insisted upon coming to the party once again. Places like these are not meant for me, neither are they my definition of 'fun'.

Taani chatted away with her friends and forced a wine glass in my hand as well. I didn't take even a sip from it though. I simply listened to them gossip around with a plastered smile on my face. I wasn't even going to bother inserting myself in the conversation.

I tried looking for Hannah and Caroline, but soon gave up on spotting them. This was a huge place, with lots of people, to find two particular people in the crown. And yet, I would occasionally look around and spot Swayam. More than half of the time, I found him, despite it being such a big party. My guess would be that he was making it a point to stay close. That, I was thankful for. He seemed to be talking with Roy and his friends, so I didn't walk myself there.

Roy came up behind me. How lost had I been in looking around and judging others that I hadn’t even realized? "Bored already?"

"Humor me!" I spoke back loudly on top of the loud music. Honestly, I was a bit surprised to see him here. It was Taani's party, and given their break up, I hadn't expected him to be here. Then again, I might have under estimated their friendship. Maybe, they were still friends after everything. I can only imagine though, it couldn't be easy for Taani.

It was obvious she still had feelings for him. Why would they break up? They were a perfect match for each other. I don't think I have seen Roy so open and happy with anyone else but Taani. Both of them are natural around each other.

"It's not that bad!" He honestly said. Then again, it was a happy moment for him. And he had his alcohol to keep him going.

"Why aren't you drinking?" He noticed my full glass.

I replied truthfully. "I don't like to drink." That, and I wasn't of legal age to be drinking. Yeah, he was. I wasn't. And yes, who really cares these days? Apparently, I still do. I was religious and despite being in foreign land for years, and probably staying here for the rest of my life, I would never drink. Just like I would never eat meat.

"Alright, how about dancing? I'm sure you don't have a thing against that?"

I laughed. Was he kidding? I loved dancing. I placed my hand in his and he led me to the dance floor. I don't know why I gave in so easily. Why was I suddenly comfortable? If I could remember correctly, I wasn't this comfortable two days ago.

Seriously, what's with these sudden changes in my reactions? They keep on switching back and forth. Not just towards him, but towards Swayam as well. Like yesterday, for the first time in years, I froze up when he was right behind me, whispering in my ear. Never had that happened before.

We danced away to all the fast songs that came about back to back. It was probably for the best. I can't imagine dancing with anyone to a soft, romantic song. I have never done that till now, and I probably never will either. Some things... are just not meant to be in my life.

After a long time, I was having this much of crazy fun. The last time I had this much fun was at my 18th birthday party, before everything changed. I stopped jumping about when I remembered that night.

I remembered I was married.

How it had ended up to be like that.

Glimpses of Sharon's face, our parents' death, the gun shots - it was all playing in front of my eyes. I squeezed my eyes shut. I didn't want to relive that moment of my life.

"What's wrong?" Roy slipped his hand on my waist and leaned in to listen to my answer.

"Just tired." I lied.

"Come, I'll get you a soft drink." I nodded and followed him as I pushed past the crowd. I waited at a distance from the bar stand. "I hope mock-tail's fine?" He asked handing it to me.

I nodded and was about to drink it when Swayam pulled it out of my hands. I looked at him confused. He gave me his glass. "Drink." I did, still not understanding the situation. When my breathing was back to normal rhythm, he announced. "The guys on the bar spiked it."

Roy looked back at the bar stand, shocked they had managed to do it when he was sure he hadn't looked away from the drink for even a micro-second. Swayam assured him. "It's not your fault. They got the bartender to do it."

We were about to forget the event when those two particular boys walked up to them, bad-mouthing Swayam. "What, dude? You just ruined the whole fun. Imagine how hot she must dance when she's out of it."

Swayam's face turned hard, and I caught a glimpse of him clenching his fist. Roy tried to stop them. "Guys, just leave. I'm warning you."

"Come on Roy. Now since when are you against all this? You were the one who always started it." They laughed about. So, he didn't change? It shocked me. Why can I never judge people right?

"Let it go guys." I told them both and pulled Swayam back by his elbow, knowing I'd have to stop him before he got pissed off. I wasn't worried about him. I knew he could hold his own in a fight. I was worried about others, and how this can get unnecessarily stretched.

"Oh look! A dog being pulled away by his master."

I was pissed off now. Swayam gave a one-sided sloppy smirk and turned around along with me. "You asked for it." He muttered. Everyone around had started to notice the fight and seemed to have gathered around

I gave them the death glare and bitch-slapped the one who had made the last comment. "Ouch." Roy winced back at how hard the slap sounded. It rang in my ear as well.

"Talk shit about me, I give a damn." Everyone's eyes widened. I was known to always keep my language in check. "I'd have forgiven you even if I had happened to drink the spiked drink. But him? You made the mistake of your life."

"Feisty, are we? Strong. I can just imagine how hot you'd be in bed." And there went another punch; this time from Swayam. I sighed.

"Not another word." He gritted through his teeth when I put a calming hand on his shoulder.

Roy

When I saw Kriya, I was instantly happy. But then, I saw Swayam. I wish he hadn't come. Yesterday, when he wasn't there while we worked on project, we actually had some decent conversations, without her looking at me like she despised me, like she had the past year and half. I had looked towards Taani for help, but seeing the state she was in, I couldn't. She had already done a lot for me by inviting her to this party. It couldn't have been easy for her.

Yesterday, the natural conversation between Swayam, Vicky and her had confused me. I hadn't seen her that open and with her guard down even when around Hannah, Caroline, or Shane. If I was right, they didn't even know about Vicky or Swayam until recently, in the past week. I would have expected them to know, given they have been friends for over a year now.

And again, now. I found it quite ironic. Kriya was defending Swayam when a word was said against him, but cared least about what was being said about herself. Then Swayam did the same. Both were ready to pounce on others who so even spoke one word against the other and at the same time, they didn't want each other to get in a fight as they found it 'useless'.

It seriously made me wonder. They couldn't be just friends. They cared too much for that.

Devon got ready to pounce back at Swayam when Kriya grabbed his hand. "Don't you dare raise a hand at him."

I was not able to understand their relationship and what was between them. I'd get confused with every interaction with them.

Devon touched Kriya's hand in response. "Come girl, why would you even want to fight for him? He's not worth it. We can give you much more."

Kriya let out a hysterical laugh. Then just as random as that was, her face went grim. She leaned in a whispered, "No one can give me more than my husband. Not even in bed." She let go of his hand with a jerk and entwined her other hand with Swayam. As the words seeped into my head, the grip on my glass loosened and it shattered on the floor. "Let's go." Kriya's sharp words sliced the pin-drop silence.

"What - what'd she say?" I looked at Taani for confirmation, refusing to accept Kriya's words. I refused to believe she had said that. She did whisper it. Maybe I was just hearing things. My heart seemed to have broken into pieces. Here I was, genuinely wanting to accept my feelings for her when she out of the blue exploded the bomb.

"I'm sorry." All Taani could do was giving me a consoling hug. She had heard it too. I looked around, to see others were confused. They didn't hear it. Taani knew how deep my feelings were directed at Kriya. She loved me. But I wasn't meant to be hers. I loved Kriya. But she couldn't be mine. It all seemed a huge fucked up game of destiny.

××××××××××××

Swayam

For some reason, I could not hold the grin away from my face. Coming out in open air, Kriya stopped to take some deep breaths to relax herself. "Those bastards!"

I came up to stand next to her. "Why did you get so mad?"

"Huh?" She looked at me as if I was stupid.

"Why did you? They said everything cheap about you. I should be the one so pissed off. And yet?"

"They made the first comment on you and then tried to punch you when you gave them a taste of their own medicine." She justified her anger. She couldn't understand the reason for my question. But, it was clear to me. She had never spoken of me in public before. Especially with claiming her right on me.

"My darling wife, if you realize, you just told a few of your friends present here, who heard you, that you're married. Wasn't it something you wanted to keep hidden?"

She was silent for a while, till realization sunk in. Then... "Oh whatever! Just drive me home." She threw another tantrum and started walking in front of me, not having an answer to my question.

I couldn't help but chuckle. Today, I was introduced to a Kriya I had never met before. One that was possessive.

"Water?" I offered as we reached her car. She took the bottle and gulped it all down. "Wow, you must really be angry." I commented, at which she just glared at me. I started the car and we drove back home. It was a full 50 minutes ride.

"Can I ask you a question?'

Kriya rolled her eyes at me. "Since when do you take permission before asking me a question?"

I took that as a yes and asked my original question. "Do you have any idea what you said back there?"

"What do you mean?" She asked, turning to face me looking away from the laptop screen.

I should have known. "Nothing. I'm gonna go sleep. Don't stay up late." I got up from the bed and walked up to her. After placing her medicine pills on the desk so she wouldn't forget, I started to move out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"I just told you - sleep." I wondered what was wrong with her, for she kept on asking questions and seemed to be lost somewhere.

"I know that. You could sleep here too, you know? You don't have to go down."

I didn't look right at her. "I know." I turned away, "Good night," and closed the door behind me. Whilst my actions were confusing her, her actions were confusing me. The things she said and did without even realizing the she was saying and doing them. I so needed to get away from here. I had been here around her for far too long.

Kriya

His response left me to wonder. Not only that, his questions today were confusing me. Is he trying to say something? If he is, I am unable to understand the meaning behind them. He knew he could stay, but he still left?

Once upon a time, when we first met, I would ask him to leave and he would still stay. Now, I was telling him he could stay, and he was doing the opposite. Will I ever be able to fully understand his actions? Just when I think I have him completely figured out, he does something out of the blue, leaving me confused and startled.

I met Swayam in the fields. He was royally laying down wearing a pair of sunglasses, my books being used as his pillow. I frowned. Why? They were books! You respect them. Not use them as your pillow! “Can I have my books back now?”

Hearing my voice, he opened his eyes. “Aah, good to see you made it here in one piece.”

I could tell he was mocking me. “I can take care of myself. My books please?”

Swayam laughed, “Sure, I saw that very well. As for your books, it’s lunch time. What do need them for right now?”

“Can I just have them back?”

“You can. After you have lunch with me.”

“I’m not hungry. And I believe it was you who told me yesterday that you knew I was not to talk to you. Why are you making this harder than it has to be?” Swayam remained silent, gaping up at me. “What?” I asked.

He shook his head, “Nothing, I never thought I’d hear you speak that much at one time!”

I mocked a laughter, “Ha-ha. Very funny. For the third time, please return my books!”

“I’ve already told you what you have to do to get them back.”

Having no option, I ended up having lunch with him. When the sandwich we’d ordered came, one of them had ‘HBD’ written with ketchup on it. I looked up at him.

“Happy Birthday.”

I was again confused with his behavior. “Uh... thank you?” It was indeed hard to figure him out. He forces me to have lunch with him, and then at the same time, his intentions are pure and to make me happy. He sides with those who were bullying me, and yet is saving me. He irritates me, only to make sure I wouldn’t run into any more trouble. Who is he exactly? The person everyone said he is, or what I am seeing him as? I wondered.

My thought chain was disturbed when he snapped his fingers in front of my eyes. I blinked them away as he asked, “Well, aren’t you going to eat?”

I nodded and began eating. Somehow, I knew that this was not the last that I’d see of him. And no matter how hard I tried to not run into him, he would go on to find reasons to run into me.

“Why are you being nice to me?” I asked suddenly.

“Huh?” He hadn’t heard me. I repeated the question. “I’m not.” He strictly denied. I couldn’t help but smile softly. I knew something about him that no one did. He wasn’t the person he was showing himself to be.

Simply to tease him a bit, I insisted, “No one’s been this kind to me. Especially a stranger.”

“I told you! I am not being nice! And since I’m a ‘stranger’, I will leave you alone to enjoy your lunch.”

I chuckled. “Sit!” I pulled him down. He was going to be stubborn and get up again, only to be pulled down again. “I said sit!” I ordered. With him, I felt like I had the right to order him. With anyone else, I wouldn’t have dared to. With him, I knew he wouldn’t hurt me, even though the time we’d spent together was brief, less than a day, and neither of us knew much about the other. The bond was just built. “I don’t like it when people leave food in their plate. It’s a waste.” I told him.

Externally, he scowled at me for forcing him, but within, I knew even he liked seeing someone having the courage to order him. I don’t think this was something he was used to. It felt good. This friendship was being built upon genuine feelings, not me afraid of him and hence doing as he asked, or him faking it because he wanted something in return.

“This is the first and last time you shall tell me what to do, or what not to.” He made it clear to me.

Though, I smiled and spoke in a challenging tone, “We’ll see about that.”

Sharon

I sat in a dark room with flickering lamp light and a photograph of Kriya and Swayam in my hand. Their faces circled in red highlighter. My next targets. It was time to mark my presence. Take back what is mine. She took someone from me. Time for me to return the favor.

"Soon, you'll be the one wanting to hide, little sister. You took the one precious to me. Least I can do is return the favor, what do you say?"

I took out the pocket knife from my pocket and scratched a line between the two faces, separating into two pieces. One held Kriya's face while the other held Swayam's.

"Game on. Sister."

××××××××××××

Swayam

I insisted upon going to my own room for I wanted some alone time to think things through. The past few days, we had practically lived in one closed room. Though I tried ignoring the feeling each time, I couldn't stop my stomach from flipping whenever she would slip past me in bed. Her pouts, her anger, her concern, her smile, her teases and her taunts. Everything about her was in a way forcing me to change his opinion on her. Forcing me to fall for her all over again. Forcing me to believe that maybe, just maybe, there is hope.

The more I tried to put the feeling past me, the stronger it became.

This wasn’t right.

Suddenly, I wanted to always keep her happy. I wanted to protect her at all times. I protected her before too, but now, the urge was more than before. I was seeing her in a whole new light and nothing I did would stop my mind or heart from going in that direction. Before today, I knew she considered me just a close friend who was her husband due to situations. And so, I too kept it till there only.

After today though, the way she reacted at the party; the way she proudly referred to me as her husband, the way she was possessive about me, the way she couldn't hear a word against me, I knew it was more than what a 'friend' would do. She wasn’t speaking as just my friend.

I had loved before and I wasn't dumb enough to not understand the signs my own heart gave me and the words she spoke of. The first time I loved, or what I thought was a love of a person, of Sharon’s, it was fake. Yes, somewhere I had accepted. I always had a crush on Kriya. For that, I went in a relationship with Sharon. To protect Kriya from Sharon.

Eventually, I started to somewhere forget things, and I thought Sharon’s love was genuine. Even though I knew better, I fell in love with her, only to realize it was all fake. It was never love her for. It was an obsession. I was an obsession to her, like everything else in her life. She wanted everything that was Kriya’s, and because I was friends with Kriya, she wanted me for herself.

But this time, I knew it was real. It had been for a very long time. I just kept on denying it over and over again.

But. Like two smart ladies in my life told me not too long ago, Aashi and Smriti, I would soon accept it.

And here I am.

Accepting it.

Kriya

I sat on a chair in the balcony in the open, chilled air, with a blanket around me. The ear plugs in my ear played a soft romantic tune. ‘Noor-E-Khuda from My Name Is Khan’. I wasn't a huge fan of listening to crazy-loud party songs at night. Well, forget night. I wasn't a fan of loud songs at any given point. I liked them to be smooth; gazals, almost a lullaby which would put me to sleep when the thoughts floating around my head wouldn't let me.

It was the first time when Swayam didn't stay back when I had said it was alright if he did. Many times, he would just sleep in if he was in my room and didn't want to walk down if he was tired. I didn’t mind either. I knew he worked too hard at work. He had lots to take care of. It wasn’t easy to handle a huge business with branches all over the country, and some even internationally.

I thought back to all the times when Swayam was always there for me. His concern for me. The way he rushed to me when my stitches had split open. Him carrying me around then. The time when his own heart wasn't stable to bear the loss of Sharon, he was still there for me. He was there with me.

Through the good times and the worst of times; he was the only one I could think of that stuck by my side, the one who was always there. My own blood abandoned me, but he never did. He always put me before himself. The little actions and concern of him made me question our relationship.

Had I unknowingly fallen for him?

Had I unintentionally started to care for him more than a friend?

Had I broken the promise I had once made to myself without knowing it myself?

Why is it like this?

I had never wanted it to be like this. I held myself at guilt for feeling this way about him. I was thinking deep but wasn't able to understand any of it. I had no answers to any of my questions. I just closed my eyes, hoping that when I wake up tomorrow, all of these feelings would be gone and life would go back to being like it was before today, before all these questions popped up in my head.

If I can just stop thinking, it will all go away. 

 ________________

A/N Here it is! I managed to post it :D Though, I had a moment of panic because I thought I lost everything I typed :P I was like, I KNOW I made a draft here when I was in class... WHY can't I see it now! I better not have accidently deleted it XP But then I refreshed & saw my wifi was gone, that's why it didn't show up. Phew! 

Anyway... I'm sure you guys don't care about that :P Here's the update. And well... KriYansh fans... hugs? In my defense, I did put up a disclaimer in the beginning itself (= 

something to think about - with Rey/Roy 'heart-broken', how do you think Sharon might twist it to her benefit? (; 

Vote & Comment please! Don't be a silent reader (= Thank you all for the reads. <3 

ALSO, from part 10, to updating this one, I noticed we got almost 90 reads!! SOOO... can I ask that we get ATLEAST 10 votes on this update before I update again? Pretty please? ^_^

Love,

~Araina