"forget about our mothers and our friends. we're fated to pretend." - MGMT

"tell me again." tammy says sitting next to her husband as maggie and i tell her about her son's death. "tammy." earl hushes as he sets a hand on his wife's knee. "tell me again, what happened." she argues. "um, ken was bit when he ran back to free one of the horses. he suffered from a pneumothorax from the horse kicking him in the chest and a bit to the arm. siddiq and i amputated his arm to try to stop the spread and opened up his chest to relieve the pressure on his lungs. but- uh, unfortunately, i didn't have every resource i needed out there and ken died from blood loss." i explain and tammy cries in her husband's arms.

"i don't accept that!" she sobs. "maggie- she took our boy out there, and for what?" tammy adds. "we couldn't have known this was going to happen, ma'am. it was an unfortunate situation-" i start before she cuts me off. "my son is dead! and what do we have to show for it? a broken plow." tammy says. "we found more than just the plow. that run was really important for the future." maggie explains. "don't you talk to me about no future right now. i know where all that shit went, maggie! the savior's got it, didn't they. he didn't even die helping hilltop!" tammy yells.

"tammy, just calm down." earl says grabbing tammy's hand. "you think i'm gonna hit those little girls?" i ain't that woman. but what kind of man are you to just let this go?" tammy cries. "i'm no kind of man at all." early sighs, walking off. "oh, no, i didn't.." tammy sobs. "if you'd let me i'd like to arrange a funeral." maggie offers gently. "me and earl will bury our boy, thank you. and you're not welcome there, neither of you. i voted for you, maggie rhee, but we are not friends." tammy adds. "i understand. i do." maggie replies as i stand there speechless. 

"you know, gregory has been saying he's the one who always put hilltop first. the man's a damn scoundrel...but maybe he's no fool." tammy explains and i almost lose it. "excuse me." i manage to spit out. i throw open the door letting it slam behind me as i sprint across hilltop toward the big house. i shut the door behind me and set a hand on my head as i pace around the foyer, holding in tears. "isa?" daryl calls out from the top of the staircase. i sniffle and watch him walk down the stairs with charlie in his arms. "hey. hey, charlie." i say with tears running down my cheeks as i grab her from daryl's arms. "how's my girl, huh?" i say holding her tightly. daryl pats my shoulder and walks out of the house. 

i walk up the staircase as charlie rests her head on my shoulder. i set her down in her crib and she falls right to sleep. i sigh and look over at the nightstand where carl's hat sits. i walk over and hold it in my hands, it still smells like him even after all these months. "it's all for you. i do it all for you." i whisper setting the hat back down on the bookshelf. the wind blows against my window, blowing the shutters lightly against the brick. i walk over to it and sit for a while, hours pass and the moon shines over hilltop. i look down by the graves and notice a man is standing there, i can't make out a face. 

i grab my machete and run down the stairs and out the door to the graves. the sound of a baby crying makes me run even faster. i turn the corner and see maggie pinned up against the wall by the same man. before i can swing my machete something hits my head, knocking me out cold.

my head burns as i open my eyes. maggie sits beside me in the infirmary. "why do i always end up here." i mumble and she laughs a bit. "what happened?' i ask sitting up a bit and grabbing at my sore head. "earl tried to kill me in the grave site, he was drinking and i guess gregory set him up. gregeory wanted me dead so he could get hilltop back for himself." she explains. "ugh, what an asshole- i could just, ugh. what are you going to do with him?" i ask frustrated and still a little dizzy. "you know what i have to do." she answers sounding a little defeated. "i'm with you. with this, with everything. do what you need to do, mags." i answer rubbing my sore eyes.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

the hot sun shines down onto the porch as i lean against the railing watching rick walk back and forth with charlie in his arms. "she looks like carl." he says looking at her small face. "yeah. she's stubborn like him too." i say and he chuckles. "when carl was a baby he wouldn't go to sleep, no matter what we tried, unless it was his idea for a nap." he explains and i smile. 'she's just perfect. she really is." he adds. "yeah. i think i'll keep her." i answer. "now that charlie's a little bit older and you're going on long runs again. i'd love for you to visit alexandria sometime, if you're up for it. judith talks about aunt isa at hilltop all the time. i'm surprised she still remembers you but she does." he explains. 

"rick, i can't. you know that." i answer. "but you came here about something else, what is it?" i add. "oh- isa, it can wait." he sighs. "i'm okay. just talk to me about anything else, please." i reply. "all right. well...i need your help fixing the bridge. i would ask maggie but she would shut it down, i know it. hilltop is thriving because of you two, this place is doing better than anywhere else and maggie, she's been generous. hilltop's given so much already, but i'm asking for more." rick explains. "what?' i ask. "sanctuary's still short on food, and a project like this is gonna take a lot of people. i'm asking if you'll be generous again, if you'll stretch." he answers. "i don't know, rick, this really would be something you should ask maggie about. i can't see her saying no to the extra hands but i don't think she would stretch our rations again, especially for the saviors." i say.

"what would she want?" he asks. "i don't know, fuel, extra labor? i don't know." i answer and he sighs. "the sanctuary barely holding on right now. we're obliged to help." he adds. "why? they surrendered. we didn't kill 'em." i say and he looks at me in disbelief. "in maggie's eyes, she's done them justice for a lifetime. she can't solve all their problems when we have stuff to take care of here." i add. "what about in your eyes? what do you think, isa." he asks me. i take a moment and think. if i agree with maggie, rick will think i betrayed my home but if i side with rick i'll also be siding with the people who hurt me, who killed joel, glenn, abe, and many more of our people. "i'm with maggie. we aren't going to hand feed them, if they can't survive where they are at now, that's their problem." i sigh and his expression slightly changes. 

"isa, i'm so sorry this happened." he says quietly. "i've survived worse. but this has to stop. when we were fighting the saviors, you told me that soon you'd be following carl and i. but you didn't. 'cause i wasn't someone to follow. that changes now. it'll be dark soon, it's time to put the kids to bed." i answer walking over to rick as he hands charlie over to me. 

the sun sets and everyone gathers around the structure that is currently being built by the gate. gregory stands in the bed of a truck with a rope tied around his neck as everyone crowds around. maggie stands there in the middle of the crowd as gregeory pleads for his life. "i don't want to do this but people need to understand at hilltop the punishment fits the crime. do you have any final words?" maggie announces to the crowd before turning to gregory. "what you're doing isn't right. somebody stop this, please. killing me in the dead of night cause you're ashamed." gregory whimpers. "you're wrong. i'm not ashamed." she says before looking over at daryl who starts up the engine of the truck. "stop this, please!" gregory cries. "maggie! the kids!" i exclaim as i watch two young kids walk over to the group of us. rick holds me back as i lunge towards maggie to get her to hold off. a woman from the crowd grabs the kid's hands and walks them back to the house just as daryl drives off in the truck.

i could hear gregory's neck crack from where i was standing. his ragged breathing and screaming bounced from tree to tree. i pant as rick lets go of my shoulders. "i made this decision. but this is not the beginning of something. i don't want to do this again. cut him down." maggie says. gregory's body drops down in front of us and daryl shoots an arrow right into his head. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

shorter chapter for today but i'm working on some in advance!! off topic buttttt i need good youtubers on youtube omg nobody good posts anymore, who do you watch??