'i'll ask politely, give me what i want.' - sir chloe

my eyes wander around the empty streets as the car stops. the scorching hot sun reflects off the trash cans sitting in the road, making them too bright to look at. piles of trash build on the side of the street as a few pieces linger in the grass and road surrounding us. "we're here." jesus says, turning back to look at the few of us that agreed to meet this 'king'. "here? where is here, jesus? we are in the middle of nowhere." i say getting out of the car and following jesus. "you said they call this place 'the kingdom'?" rick asks. "yeah, i didn't name it." jesus answers. i look around at the deserted buildings that are slowly crumbling to the ground. the smell of dust and pungent oder of decaying corpses dance in the air. "where is it?" rick asks again looking around at the same buildings i am. 

"well, technically, we're already here. it's the outer edge." jesus informs. "so what the hell we waitin' on?" daryl asks stepping out of the car to join us outside. "for them." jesus answers pointing off down the street. off in the distance the sound of hooves beating echoes through the small town. i squint and see two men riding upon horses, decked out in armour you'd find at a spirit halloween. "who dares to trespass on the sovereign land of the- oh, shit. yo, jesus, is that you?" one of the men says as he rides up in front of us. "who are all these people, paul?" the other man asks and it takes me a second to remember jesus's real name is paul. "hi, richard. nice to see you." jesus replies. "good to see you too. your friends, who are they?" richard asks. "this is rick grimes. he's the leader of a like-minded community. these are some of his people. we would like to request an audience with king ezekiel." jesus explains and richard dismounts his horse. 

"get out of the car." richard says and the rest of our group joins us in the blazing sun. the weather is getting hot now, hotter than before. soon it will be too miserable to go out in. "you say they're a.. like-minded community. like-minded how?" richard questions. "we live, we trade, we fight the dead. sometimes others." jesus replies. "line up." richard says and i look at rick before moving. "okay, this is a waste of time. come on." daryl remarks as he turns back to the car. "maybe you're right. the king is a busy man. and it is a dangerous world. we don't usually allow a pack of strangers to waltz through our door." richard chimes in. "we want to make the world less dangerous, and we are all here to show the king how serious we are about that." michonne says. 

"the car stays outside. you gotta hand over your guns." richard announces. "we only have 3." rick says and carl and i both take out our guns and hand them over. "okay. follow me." richard says as he leads us towards a path tucked away behind some trees. sticks and rocks crunch under my boots as carl and i walk up the path following everyone. "you think this will work out?" i squint up to look at his face. "yeah, i do. i have a good feeling about these people." he answers. "kinda weird, right?" i whisper and he smirks. "a bit yeah. what's with the gear?" he replies coping with my quiet tone. a moment of silence passes between the two of us. 

"have you uh, given any more thought to that list enid gave you?" he asks talking about the list of baby names enid had brought me. "i picked a few i liked. some sounded too dorky or i've already met someone with that name. i want the baby to have its own name and its own shadow, you know?" i explain. "yeah, i get it. my dad let me name judith and i went through the names of people we lost but none seemed right. they were all people i once knew and it felt wrong to just take their name." he answers. we reach a cleared area of grass and in front of us stands walls taller than ours. "welcome to the kingdom." the guard says opening the gates.

brick buildings stand tall enclosing hundreds of people at work. gardens are laid out randomly through the town square filling it with color and life. "they have the numbers." michonne says standing with her hands on her hips as we all take in the joy and pride these people give off as they mingle with one another. "but can they fight?" rosita asks snapping us back to reality. "oh, they can fight." jesus answers restoring my hope in these people. groups of men run through the square as they train. old people sit on the benches around the flowers and smile as they watch the young children play in the grass as their mothers talk and tend to the gardens, laundry, and food growing in front of all of us. 

"morgan?" tara says and i look over to my right to see morgan standing there with richard behind him. he smiles and greets us all. "how do you know each other?" richard asks. "we go back to the start." rick answers. carl had told me the story of rick and morgan and how morgan saved him after he woke up in the hospital. one lucky bastard rick is to have survived that with zero clue of what the hell was happening around him. "well, the king is ready to see you." richard answers and leads us to a building not too far from the entrance. my stomach twists as we enter the building which was once a theatre. 

 rows and rows of chairs sit in front of a stage at the back of the room. a fairytale palace backdrop hangs behind a giant chair sitting in the middle of the stage. a man holding a staff sits in the chair. i blink a couple of times hoping to clear away the image of a tiger walking behind him then approaching his side and growling at us. i grab carl's hand and stay behind him. big animals were always frightening to me. my parents always took zephyr and i to the zoo for family outings and i would always hear stories of kids falling into pens and being eaten by lions and tigers and bears. i wonder how he managed to get it here and keep it so docile.

the man holds a chain leash that is attached to the tiger and once i see that i feel my stomach at ease a bit. "jesus! it pleases me to see you, old friend." the king says. two other men are joined at his side, one looks like he could be around me and carl's age. "it pleases him, indeed!" the older man repeats. "jerry." the king hushes. "tell me, what news do you bring to good king ezekiel. are these new allies you've brought me?" ezekiel asks. i stand there staring down the tiger as it stares back at me and i feel it's not the only thing staring at me. i look at the king and then at his men studying their appearances. the younger one has his eyes focused on me as i peer over carl's shoulder. 

"indeed, they are, your majesty. this is.." jesus says turning back to look at all of us still standing in the doorway. "oh, right. i forgot to mention that-" jesus says walking back up to us as rick finishes his sentence. "yeah, a tiger." rick says walking in front of us. the tiger roars as it lies down next to ezekiel. "this is rick grimes, the leader of alexandria, and these are some of his people." jesus says introducing us as we slowly follow him closer to the stage. "i welcome you all to the kingdom, good travellers. now, what brings you to our fair land? why do you seek an audience with the king?" ezekiel asks. 

"ezekiel- king..ezekiel. alexandria, the hilltop, and the kingdom- all three of our communities have something in common. we all serve the saviors. alexandria already fought them once, and we won. we thought we took out the threat, but we didn't know then what we know now. we only beat one outpost. we've been told you have a deal with them, that you know them. then you know they rule with violence and fear." rick explains. "your majesty, i only told them of the- " jesus says before the king cuts him off. "our deal with the saviors is not known amongst my people- for good cause. we made you a party to that secret when you told us of the hilltop's own travails, but we did not expect you to share-" ezekiel argues. "we can help each other." jesus adds. 

"don't interrupt the king." jerry says. "we brought you into our confidence. why did you break it?" ezekiel asks clearly upset we know about their deal with the saviors. "because i wanted you to hear rick's plans." jesus answers. "and what plans have you, rick grimes of alexandria?" ezekiel asks. "we came to ask the kingdom, to ask you, to join us in fighting the saviors, fighting for freedom for all of us." rick replies. "what you are asking is very serious." ezekiel says. "several of our people- good people- were killed by the saviors, brutally." michonne adds. "who?" morgan asks as his face drops a bit. "abraham. glenn. joel. spencer, olivia, denise, eugene was taken. they took daryl. he escaped. every second he's out here, he's a target." i say. "you gonna say you were right?" rosita asks. morgan had left because he didn't want to fight the saviors. he stood up in that church that day and made a decision to leave.

funny how he still ended up back in the middle of it. "no. i'm..i'm just real sorry that they're gone." he answers. "negan murdered glenn, abraham, and joel, beat them to death." rick says and i start to feel the anger and sadness build back up. it goes away sometimes, mostly when i'm with carl. he distracts me from it during the day but at night, the image of negan swinging his bat down on joel's head right next to me keeps me from sleeping. it's burned into my eyes and it won't ever go away. "he terrorized the hilltop, set loose walkers just to make a point." sasha adds. "i used to think the deal was something we could live with. a lot of us did. but that's changing. so let's change the world, your majesty." jesus says.

"i want to be honest with what we're asking. my people are strong but there's not enough of us. we don't have guns- not enough, at least. not a lot of weapons, period." rick explains. "we have people. and weapons. if we strike first, together, we can beat them. your majesty, no more waiting for things to get worse, beyond what we can handle. we set things right. the time is now." richard says, trying to persuade the king. "morgan, what say you?" ezekiel asks and i pray he's changed his mindset. "me?" morgan replies. "speak." ezekiel adds. "people will die. a lot of people and not just the saviors. if we can find another way, we have to. maybe it's just about negan- just capturing him, holding him." morgan says and i sigh. 

"the hour grows late. rick grimes of alexandria.. you have given the king much to ponder." ezekiel says standing up from his chair. "well, when i was a kid, my mother told me a story. there was a road to a kingdom, and there was a rock in the road. and people would just avoid it, but the horses would break their legs on it and die, wagon wheels would come off. people would lose the goods they were sellin'. that's what happened to a little girl.  the cask of beer her family brewed fell right off. it broke. dirt soaked it all up, it was gone. that was her family's last chance. they were hungry. they didn't have much money. she just sat there and cried, but..she wondered why it was still there..why someone hasn't done something yet. so she dug at that rock in the road with her hands till they bled, used everything she had to pull it out." rick explains and i wonder if this story is real or if he's making it up.

"it took hours. and then..when she was gonna fill it up, she saw something in it. it was a bag of gold." rick adds. "all right." jerry mumbles with a smile. "the king had put that rock in the road because he knew the person who dug it out, who did something, they deserved a reward. they deserved to have their life changed for good..forever." rick continues. "i invite you all to sup with us and stay till the morrow." ezekiel offers. "yeah, we need to get back home." rick answers. "i shall deliver my decree in the morn." ezekiel says banging his staff twice on the floor, finalizing his decision. the sun starts to set as we head back toward the car. by the time we reach it it's dark out. we all quietly pile in and rick starts driving back home. i rest my head on carl's shoulder and he rests his on my head. 

"you okay?" carl asks me quietly. i nod as i yawn a bit. the ride back home was extremely quiet. no one said a word the whole ride back. my eyes watch out the window as we pass some dead ones on the road. the stars shine extra bright tonight and i take it as a good sign. everyone tiredly walks home once we get back in through the gates and i follow carl back to his house along with rick and michonne tailing behind us. we say our goodnights to rick and michonne then i find myself wrapping up in carl's bed. he lays next to me and shuts the light off. "sometimes it slips my mind that joel's gone. it's not long, most times just a split second, but when it does i expect to see him beside me or standing in our group." i say turning to face carl. 

"i want negan dead. i don't want to capture him and hold him prisoner, he doesn't deserve to live. i'm gonna kill him the same way he killed joel." i add. "i know, i'm sorry." carl answers. "it's not fair." i say still with dry eyes, surprisingly. "i know it isn't but you shouldn't devote your whole life to trying to get back at him, nothing you do will ever be as painful and equal to what he took from us. you will end up driving yourself crazy, isa." carl explains. "i know." i say and the quiet noise of the fan drowns out the room. "get some sleep." carl says kissing my forehead. i don't even bother shutting my eyes because i know if i do all i will see is negan.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

does anyone else miss the yt family bratayley? i was watching old vids and i got so sad omg..

also i'm starting to get my applications ready for uni 🤭