a/n~welcome back <3 certainly prepare yourself

"in which anger turns to a kiss of bittersweet love confessions"

❝𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫; 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞.❞

     Her eyes were glossy with a suppressed sense of dread as she looked up at Ivan. His features were plastered with excitement mixed with an inquisitive confusion. (y/n) was trying her hardest to breathe steadily, to stop herself from succumbing to the pain she felt in her throat, to not crumble like a delicate statue right in front of the boy that sat before her.

She was suffocating in her own sorrow and gut wrenching pain; attempting to not drown under the waves of earth shattering disappointment.

Drowning. Even the deepest of waters couldn't bring her under compared to the stream of blood that leaked out of her cracked heart.

"So," she continued with a shaky breath, "what do you say? Come to the Yule Ball with me?"

Ivan looked like a word of agreement was stuck in his throat, but his body was fighting against it, holding it down with chains of...humanity? Guilt? Pity?

A noise escaped into his breath, almost like an airy laugh. Although (y/n) couldn't exactly tell what was funny about the whole situation. "I...don't mean to be a prude, but weren't you going with Harry? I mean, I feel like he'd be sort of broken up to randomly hear that you and I-"

"Who cares about Harry! let alone if his precious feelings are somehow shattered." (y/n) abruptly bursted. She immediately looked at the floor, her ears hot with embarrassment and lingering anger. She couldn't tell if she actually wanted to go with Ivan or if he was just the one guy that she could go with that would cut Harry deepest. "I'm sorry. I just mean...well, Harry I aren't exactly going together anymore. Something came up. Or rather someone."

Ivan shifted awkwardly, eventually placing a tentative hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry. If you truly are asking, I'd be honored to go with you to the ball." He gave her a meek smile, kindness that could almost be considered fake if you looked hard enough.

(y/n) cringed at his words. What was she doing? It felt wrong. Like she was giving up on Harry too easily. Perhaps he really was telling the truth and all she did was scream at him to leave the second he tried to explain himself.

No. If he truly cared he would've fought harder to stay. He wouldn't have been with Romilda.

Romilda Vane. (y/n)'s new prey. Her new vessel for hatred and eventual jealousy. Romilda's face reminds her of what Harry apparently likes, and how she's nothing like her.

This one, horrible, incident. Erasing everything they've built with each other like dust being carried away by a devilish wind. (y/n) could feel him slipping through her fingers like sand from a now broken hourglass. The seconds no longer being counted. She's trying to capture every grain she can, but nothing wants to stick to her fingers even though they're wet with her own tears of sacrifice .

Remembering the Bulgarian boy in front of her, (y/n) stitched a smile onto her lips. "Great. It's a date then." There was a tense pause. "I'd love to chat, but I really ought to get some sleep. Big day tomorrow. Goodnight, Ivan."

"Goodnight, (y/n)," Ivan said softly. "Say, would you care to accompany me at the next task?"

(y/n) hurriedly collected her things and rose, "Uh, yeah, maybe. We'll see."

Her back was turned and her body around the corner before he could reply with anything back.

(y/n) slammed her dormitory door with her back against the bone chilling wood. Her facade immediately faltering under the pressure of her lung crushing agony.

She wonders why he did it. If hew was possibly polyjuiced. Every possibility went through her brain faster than her nerves could process the arms being wrapped around her. She refused to believe that was Harry. It was his body, but Satan's soul. Harry got nervous around her. He held her hand when he was nervous. Twirled her hair in the common room when he was trying to memorize the ingredients to a potion. Hugged her when she was sad.

This Harry, the new version that was with another striking Hogwarts student, broke her heart without thought. Snapped it in half like it was a stubborn twig he couldn't burn.

(y/n) was so deep in her own thoughts that she tuned out her own wails and hadn't realized that she was now on her bed, Hermione sleepily asking her what was wrong.

"(y/n) I need you to take a breath and tell me what on earth happened to you." Hermione was practically pleading at this point, groggily trying to get the girl to quiet down and not wake the other dormmates.

(y/n) looked Hermione dead in the eyes. Her face alarmingly straight as her cheeks glimmered with the faint trace of tears. "He was with her. In the common room, he was on another girl. I don't...even think I recognize him right now."

Hermione looked as perplexed as she does in the middle of a test. Wondering if her best friend was drugged or waking up from some sort of bad dream. "Who? Who was with another girl?"

(y/n) choked. Not even wanting to formulate his name onto her tongue. It seemed like it was a cursed word. Something that stabbed her every time she dare speak it. "Harry. Harry and Romilda Vane."

Hermione squeezed her eyes shut as she let out a devastated sigh, dropping her chin to her chest before gaining the strength to look back at the murderous look of misery (y/n) had carved into her skin. "I'm...so beyond sorry. Truly, I...don't know what to say. That's so unlike him. Is there anything you need? I can totally kick his ass if you need me to." Hermione gave a tight lipped smile.

(y/n) shook her head in deafening silence. Numbly laying her head onto her pillow and staring into the static of the dark. Her mind racing with a trillion thoughts about how she could mend the feeling of her heart in her stomach, like she was going to throw it up.

She hates how she still loves him. How the feeling won't just disintegrate. How it lingers in her stomach when she pictures his face, but soon turns to nausea when mixed with a girl's face that isn't her own.

She knew she shouldn't let their hearts get too close. They collided and the force made them shatter. Now every time she walks near him her feet will be cut from the shards that remain from their innocent passion.

Before her mind could even let her sleep, her journal was in her hand and her quil violently scratching against the paper.

To No One,

How dare you. I feel stupid and irrational for even caring, because you're not even mine. It felt like you were. I thought you were just such a shy person that you wouldn't dare to even confess anything. That you showed your lingering affection through the touch of my skin or the way you allowed your pupils to drown into my own, not showing any signs of pulling away. Now I just feel insane. Like I made it all up, because I've seen it. You with another girl that's not me. If there really was a flame you were feeding, she wouldn't even be seen by you. She'd be invisible. Instead she's feeling the grooves in your fingertips and noticing how you always look confused whenever you're nervous and can never seem to put together a thought that isn't complete and utter nonsense. All the things that were once noticed by me are now being noticed by her. I hate myself for still loving you. That my affection towards you overpowers the fiery rage that builds up when I replay what you did alongside your face, replay every single moment we've ever had together. I guess every single moment I thought we've had together. Was I really so hopeful and lovestruck that I was seeing something that wasn't really there? Imagining the signs that you had some sort of attraction for me? I hate that I don't hate you. I smile when I remember all the little compliments you'd give me and all the nights you told me you'd never leave. The promises that you made and the things that you gave me. The times you almost kissed me. I should've known better. Now when I remember those moments the butterflies feel withered, because now there's also a blackhole of emptiness I feel when I remember you. Some people might say I'm being dramatic considering we aren't even together, but they will never understand the intensity of our chemistry. The intensity of what I felt for you. What I'll always feel, no matter what you do or how many times you knock me down. You're the one that made me feel safe, as if nothing in the world could touch me. Yet, the painful truth is that you were the one that ended up breaking me. That's what scares me. That's what makes me a pit of empty shards of my own self-pity. My own vengeance and despair. You Harry. You....

It was a flood of everything. (y/n) could've written a scroll long enough to fit around the entire world. It was so hard to describe the pain and suffering. So much so that sometimes all you can do is flood so many sentences till you find just enough to barely skim the surface of what you feel.

She spent so long attempting to put her sorrow into words that slept with her quill in hand. Perfect circles of tears staining the journal that lay beneath her cheek.

There's nothing more painful than grieving someone that is still alive.

There is one thing (y/n) does know.

They will pay.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The bright morning Sun leaked through the windows like a piercing flare. The snow outside making it near impossible to look outside for fear that one's corneas would shrivel up like a leaf being cremated in deep flames.

(y/n) was completely buried under her sheets, not knowing how early it was or how long she'd been awake, simply staring at the light that somehow managed to puncture through her thick duvet. Her body only a silhouette of a ball to her other dormmates.

She could hear the faint shuffling of Hermione grumbling to herself and digging through her trunk, most likely stressing about the events of the day.

(y/n) almost gasped as all of a sudden her lungs felt heavy and her soul bleeding. When she first woke, her brain was empty, like she had a clean slate. Then, when she got thinking, she also got reminded of everything that had happened.

How today was the Yule Ball. How she was going to be dancing with a broken heart and running mascara.

It was a true pity. The Yule Ball used to give her butterflies and anticipation of all the possibilities the glamor of teenage angst presents. Now when she thinks of it, her heart feels as though it is being ground with a cement hammer and fed to her with glass.

The girl has a glimmer of hope that sometimes surfaces, how she hoped Harry would burst into the common room today and confess his love for her. However, it only makes the pain worse once realizing how impossible it would be. For Harry to be brought back to her.

How did she go from being the date of the boy of her dreams to Ivan Petrov.

No offense to him-maybe all offense- but he did not possess the effortless art of being an artists muse that Harry Potter did.

She used to build dreams about him. Used to use him as a reason to go to class. Used to listen to his voice to put a smile on her face.

How does all of that get ripped away in an instant. It seems impossible when you're living through it. Like trying to rip the stars from the ink black sky. It can be done; but it leaves a hole.

The whole day will be needed to prepare herself for tonight. Tonight will be when she has to witness Romilda drown in a sea of Emerald green; like she once did. Watch her fall deep for the boy with soft hair and a heart so bright that not even a pure form of evil could penetrate it.

Hermione gently lifted a corner of the duvet, crookedly smiling down at her best friend, who's face looked blank and reserved. Full of no motivation or will to survive. It took a moment for (y/n)'s face to plaster a faint glimmer of recognition that the bushy-haired girl was staring down at her.

"Feeling alright this morning?" Hermione asked tenderly. Slowly backing up once (y/n) started to sit upright.

The question was almost laughable. "Feeling worse knowing I'll have to see him tonight." She paused, noticing Hermione's dress hanging from the frame of her bed, a brilliant blue, with a dazzling headpiece laying gently on her neatly pressed bed. Her own problems went away when she realized how selfish she had been. Hermione is going to have the night of her life, yet (y/n) had been dragging her down with her own miseries, not letting her best friend gush about her perfect fairytale.

Hermione blushed as she bit her lip and looked out the window. "Do you...think it's nice enough? My dress. I've been a bit worried I wouldn't look formal enough in it. I want it to make me feel pretty. I want Ron...I mean, Viktor to think I look pretty."

(y/n)'s heart sunk. Hermione's always struggled with her appearance, always surprised when a guy so much as glanced in her direction. "Oh, Hermione." She got up, admiring the slight glimmer in the periwinkle gown up close. "It is absolutely gorgeous. You'll be the talk of the evening with a dress like this. I'm sure you will look beautiful." She smiled at Hermione, giving a reassuring glance.

Hermione smiled giddily, spinning in a circle. "Oh I just can't wait. I mean I still can't believe I'm going with the Viktor Krum." Hermione gasped excitedly, taking hold of (y/n)'s hands. "We're both going with Durmstranges. Maybe we can almost do a double date."

(y/n) held back the urge to burst into tears at the thought of not having Harry. "Definitely," she smiled. "Why don't we go get some breakfast? Big day ahead of us."

Hermione nodded eagerly, throwing her hair into a messy bun and grabbing a copy of the Daily Prophet.

The news had begun to spread around here and there, (y/n) occasionally catching a couple sorrowful glances from girls in the corridors. The real challenge came when her feet made contact with the floor of the Great Hall.

She caught Harry's eye, and they both looked away. His eyes had been red. Almost like he had been crying, but she refused to feel anything but anger.

Hermione, noticing the tension, placed a hand on (y/n)'s shoulder. "Would you like me to sit with you?"

(y/n) shook her head. "You don't have to, Hermione. He did nothing to you."

Hermione scoffed and shook her head. "Actually if he hurt you, he hurt me too. C'mon, there's some empty seats by Ginny."

The two girls sat by the red-haired Weasley, who looked pleasantly surprised to be visited by the two, but also extremely perplexed as to why they weren't by Harry and Ron. She looked between the two who smiled gloomily at her. "Don't get me wrong, I am delighted that you two are here, but why are Harry and Ron not in the mix this morning?" Her cereal dripped from her spoon as she stared till given an answer.

(y/n) sighed as she aggressively stabbed a piece of sausage, cutting it into tiny pieces with rage. "Idiot scum."

Ginny looked taken aback, observing the fuming Lupin, then looking at Hermione who shook her head, before going back to her cereal. "Got it."

Hermione anxiously unwrinkled the newspaper in hand, before finally turning to Ginny. "You don't happen to know Romilda Vane do you?"

(y/n) snapped her head up, "Hermione-"

"It's just a question!" She looked back at Ginny once (y/n) put her attention back at her breakfast. "Do you?"

Ginny, confused as ever, thought for a moment. "I don't talk to her much besides in class. Only thing I've heard a couple people say is that she's had a weird obsession for Potter ever since she came to this bloody school. Why?"

Hermione cleared her throat, pretending to go back to the paper. "No reason in particular. Just wondering who she was."

(y/n) scoffed, glancing up at Ginny with a matter of fact expression. "What Hermione is too polite to say, is that I caught Harry and Romilda together last night, so now him and I are no longer going to the Yule Ball as a pair."

Ginny opened and closed her mouth, looking as shocked as an owl about to meet a window. "I had no idea. I'm so sorry. I...could've sworn you and Harry were endgame. He seemed so enchanted after he asked you to the dance."

(y/n) shrugged, trying to be nonchalant, "It's fine, really. Besides, I'm going with Ivan now. He's just as good as."

Everyone at the table knew this was in no way true. Just as much as they knew how much pain (y/n) was in at the moment about the boy she's loved since third year.

She could see Harry in the corner of her eye, staring into the side of her head, before she could see his lips move in pardon to Ron.

"Well I hope it really is fine, because Harry seems to be heading over here." Ginny said with a slight smirk.

The thought made her breath rattle in her ribs, her palms started to sweat and she wanted to smile because maybe he would talk to her. Maybe she would be able to hear the vibration of his voice or smell the faint hint of his shampoo.

She could feel it. His presence standing next to her. It took everything not to jump up and hug him, tell him he was forgiven and they could start over. No, she was too stubborn to give in that easily. She had to be, or else he would think he could do anything to her and expect to automatically be forgiven.

"Look at the time. Getting a bit close to the ball, don't you think Hermione?" Ginny said hurriedly.

Hermione looked confused before realizing the importance of their presence, "Oh most definitely. I need your help with a few last minute decisions, Ginny."

The two girls gave Harry a hurried glance, before rising from the benches and moving elsewhere.

Harry stood awkwardly, waiting for (y/n) to give him so much as a look. When she continued to ignore him, he cautiously sat down beside her. "Morning, (y/n)."

Silence.

"Look...I'm not sure what you think you saw last night, but it wasn't how it looked."

More silence.

Harry frustratingly tried to get the words out as he looked at the girl that sat beside him in pieces. "I tried to explain myself last night, but I thought it best to give you some space. You weren't in the right mindset. You were angry. I understand why you would think I was with Romilda. I get it, but I swear to you (y/n), I just tripped. That was all. I could never do something so...so cruel. Especially if you and I were going together."

She contemplated his words. Let them sink in. It hurt. She couldn't tell if she heard a weird tone in his voice. "I'm sorry, Harry. I just...saying that you 'just tripped' is awfully vague for my taste. It's ok. I can't compete with Romilda Vane."

With ice fueling her vengeance, (y/n) finally looked straight into his eyes. It took them both aback for a moment, to finally see each other again. She made sure he wasn't going to look away, made sure he could feel her emotions slither into his chest. She decided to strike. "Besides," she gave a slight smile, "I've got a date."

Harry almost flinched at the wound just carved into him. He took a moment to collect himself. "You, uh, do?"

(y/n) began to gather her things before looking at him one last time. "I do. Ivan Petrov. You remember him, yes?"

Harry sat frozen as (y/n) swung her legs around the bench, getting up and walking away without another word. She felt awful. Why did she just do that? She knew that would hurt him. He hated Ivan, would regularly become jealous from him being flirty with her. This only confirmed Harry's fear.

This wasn't like her. What she just did was cruel and heartless.

It was also necessary. He made her like this. His choices came with consequences.

She only hoped he wasn't telling the truth. If he was, she just won douchebag of the year.

She had wanted to be his midnight muse. For him to whisper secrets into her ears and write about her when he was alone. To feel his love for her in the marrow of his bones. To become the sight that made him believe in soulmates.

Yet somehow, someway, in some turn of events. In some alternate reality.

She had become Harry Potter's enemy.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"You said what?" Hermione gasped.

The two girls were sitting in the courtyard, watching from the sidelines as a cluster of students-including Ron and Harry-aggressively whipped snowballs at each other.

The air was crisp and stinging. The slash of the wind's blade making everyone's cheeks bleed a rosy pink. Tiny flakes of glittering ice floated from the graceful clouds above towards the busy grounds of the magical school. Clumps of natures frozen tundra flew through the air in a playful fight of whimsical purity.

"Hermione, it's not that big of a deal. He did much worse. All I did was tell him that him and I were no longer going together by informing him...I got another date." (y/n) stared off into the distance, realizing what she had said to Harry. She looked over at Hermione who was wide eyed, patiently waiting for her best friend to finish her realization. "Ok I will admit it was a little too much, but he still started it."

Hermione sighed, "I just don't understand how everything changed so fast. Everyone had been rooting for you two since third year. Nothing but care and affection shown between you two, like no one else was in the room. Then all of a sudden...what? He's your arch nemesis? Are you sure this whole thing wasn't just some misunderstanding? It's highly unlike something Harry would do."

(y/n) looked at him. Laughing while she drowned in her own sorrow from the inside out. The feeling of eternal doom growing from the bottom of her stomach up. She hadn't even seen Romilda since the whole thing happened. "I don't know...I mean it is highly unlike Harry. But sometimes we think we know someone, and they turn out to be the opposite."

"(y/n)," Hermione cooed. "We've known Harry since we were eleven. Don't you think this is something worth trying to fix?"

"Hermione," (y/n) said, mocking the tone her best friend had previously used, "of course I do, but all friends have rough spots. Even if this is going to be resolved in the future, the wounds are still fresh and I am acting accordingly. I could say the same about Ron. Although you seem to have moved past it."

Hermione shook her head, "It's not the same. I have Viktor-"

"And I have Ivan." (y/n) bit back.

Hermione gave out an airy chuckle that was barely audible. "You don't actually like him. You know that you don't. The only reason going with Ivan seems so appealing is because you're using it as some sort of revenge towards the person, the only person, you want to truly go with." There was a silent pause. "I will admit, there is a part of me that'd rather be going with Ron, but I'm appreciating what I do have."

"Oi, Hermione!" Ron yelled from the middle of the snowball ballistics. His nose and cheeks were a warm shade of cherry, striking against his pale skin, the white wonderland making his delicate freckles pop. Lines outlining the sides of his mouth as he gave the bushy-haired girl a sideways, toothy smile, pushing up his knitted hat and revealing pieces of his fiery hair. "Why don't you join us?"

Hermione gave a smile back, bashfully pretending to be invested in the cover of her book. She looked up before standing, dragging her best friend with her. "Can't Ronald, we have to start getting ready for the dance."

Ron threw his hands up, laughing in disbelief. "What, you need three hours?" Distracted by his own intrigue, Ron was smacked in the side of the head with a rather large snowball thrown by none other than George Weasley. As Hermione walked away giggling, Ron yelled after her over the intense laughter. "Who're you going with?"

Hermione only waved him off and continued to walk.

What others failed to notice was that Harry and (y/n) had been staring relentlessly at each other. Each longing for the night before to be erased. To be able to talk to each other again. Laugh and cry and mourn. Together. To be one again, even if it were just simply as friends. How could one girl do so much irreparable damage. Wreak havoc on a three year friendship, a budding romance.

(y/n) was pleading with her eyes. Pleading for him to not give up on her. Pleading for him to not let go.

Pleading for him to keep his promise of always.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The mirror was taunting. Its irradiant surface providing every haunting detail of what the world sees. 

(y/n) stood admirably at herself, her dress sparkling dreamily underneath the soft candlelight of the dorm. She couldn't help but smile, it was everything she had ever dreamed. All thanks to the generosity of Remus Lupin, and the impeccable style of Marlene McKinnon. 

(y/n)'s dress was snug everywhere it needed to be, becoming flowy and structured as it cascaded around her legs, falling gracefully to the ground. It was a beautiful red color, Marlene's favorite shade as it seems, the sparkles throughout not overly suffocating. Just enough that they glittered subtly under the lights, like the sparkle of waves at sunset. The straps hung delicately off her exposed shoulders, the gentle lace adding an extra taste of formality and sophistication. Her hair was done just how she liked it, perfectly framing her face in the most flattering of ways, the red tint of her matte lipstick adding a fresh look natural beauty, but enough to outline the brilliance of her skin tone. 

There were stones in strands of her hair that glittered formally in essence.

Hermione walked in, her heels clicking on the oak heavy floor. A slight gasp escaped her lips and as she became visible in the mirror, (y/n) could see her expression carry a look of overjoyed admiration and astonishment. 

"You are absolutely stunning," Hermione marveled, resting her head on her best friends shoulder as they looked at each other through their reflections. "I believe the stars will be shining for you tonight. Harry's going to regret his choices once he sees the goddess that he gave up."

(y/n) couldn't help but notice a tinge of tears flooding her own eyes. She turned to Hermione, giving her  a hug so tight she could feel all her dread flood out of her system. 

"Thank you, Hermione. For everything. I couldn't ask for a better friend to be by my side." (y/n) pulled away, wiping the tears from her cheeks and taking a deep breath, not being in the state for sentiments. "Now, you talk about me, but what about you Miss Hermione Granger. You truly are a sight for sore eyes. I don't think I've ever had the privilege of seeing someone so beautiful. Viktor is a lucky man."

She smiled, "Thank you."

Hermione's dress was tight around her chest, hanging loosely at the bottom, ruffled sleeves resting on her shoulders. Her hair was tame, done up neatly with a glamorous barrette, a single curled strand laying daintily over her chest. She carried herself differently-more confident or perhaps not having the pressure of all the books- and she smiled with nervous excitement. A glow that seeped through her every pore like waterfalls of majestic effortlessness. 

(y/n), dumfounded by what she suddenly realized, closely observed the smile of Hermione Granger. Amusingly laughing at what she saw, she looked at her best friend, "Hermione, did you...shrink your teeth?"

Hermione bashfully looked away, biting the inside of her cheek as she laughed nodding her head. "After Malfoy cast that spell on me I had to go to Madam Pomfrey to get my teeth back to how they were. She told me to tell her when they were back to their normal size, so I figured what was the harm in letting her go a little farther."

(y/n) shook her head as she admired Hermione's new appearance. "Well, I for one think they look amazing."

There was a gentle knock at the door, Katie Bell entering the room with a confident grace. She was wearing a simple gown of baby blue, showing off the figure that was usually hidden underneath skirts and baggy shirts. Her makeup was down simply, with her dark, chocolate hair pinned into a bun that was on the back of her head, with gold intertwined within the curls. 

"Katie," (y/n) awed, "you look incredible."

Katie smiled and looked at the floor nervously, "Thank you, (y/n). You two look...absolutely gorgeous." Katie admired the two girls before closing her eyes as she snapped back into reality. "Um, Ivan and Viktor are waiting for you both in the entrance hall." Katie leaned closer to the girls, lowering her voice, "They both look rather dashing I might add."

The three giggled, before Katie left to return to her own date. 

"Ready?" Hermione asked, holding her arm out and hooking it with (y/n)'s at the elbow.

"Ready as I can be," (y/n) sighed. 

They reached the corner of the entrance hall, (y/n) insisting Hermione appear first. "Seriously, 'Mione, you deserve to be first. Besides, I'm trying to put off seeing Harry and Ivan for as long as possible."

"If you insist on it," Hermione laughed, taking a deep breathe. "Wish me luck."

Then she was gone, and (y/n) could almost hear the gasps when everyone laid their eyes on her. How they noticed that the Hermione Granger who had her face usually behind books, was truly quite beautiful. 

After a couple moments, (y/n) finally plucked up the courage to make her appearance. She rounded the corner, appearing at the top of the stair landing. Nervously, she slowly made her way down the steps, holding her dress up slightly with both hands. She looked around, telling herself she was just observing, but in reality she was looking for him. 

Everyone stared at her in marvel. Whispered how (y/n) (l/n) looked as though she could fit in as a person of royal status. The diamond of the first water. Flawless, breathtaking, every word you could think of. 

Even though all eyes were on her, her only concern was Harry.

It was like jumping in a lake of cold water; when their eyes met. Harry had been smiling at Hermione, before spotting (y/n). He was frozen, his chest rising and falling as his mouth was slightly parted. It was like watching an angel float down from the palace of heaven. 

She wanted to be able to whisper to him how amazing he looked. How his combed hair looked soft as it rested slightly on his forehead. His dress robes were an ink black, like it was dyed with the light from the deepest parts of the ocean. A neatly pressed dress shirt of pure white rested against his toned chest-that Romilda's hand was annoyingly resting on. 

As (y/n) couldn't take her eyes away from his, a crave for more swallowed her whole. Followed by a dagger in her stomach when she realized this was probably the closest she'd get to him all night. Then the dagger twisted itself within her organs when she noticed a head of curls clinging beside him. Romilda's curls. He had taken her as his date. 

Maybe her overthinking was right. Maybe he had been lying about what really happened that night. 

Harry noticed immediately when (y/n)'s face suddenly contorted with pain, and her breathing hitched. He looked next to him, realizing it was because of the girl he was accompanied by. When he looked back she was still looking at him, betrayed and frozen in the middle of the staircase.

 He noticed as Ivan made his way up to her. She noticed how Romilda nudged his arm to try and lead him away. 

They were forced to look away from each other, even though their minds whispered each others names. Their minds were intertwined with the same thought.

Please, don't fall in love with him.

Please, don't fall in love with her.

It was Christmas, yet the only thing he had gifted her with was loneliness and grief. 

"Are you alright?" Ivan asked, genuinely concerned as he led her down the stairs, her hand loosely in his as a railing. 

She forgets he's there half the time. Maybe this was good. Maybe Harry was supposed to break her so Ivan could pick up her pieces. 

"Yes, fine thank you." She forced a smile as they reached the floor, looking up at her date. "You clean up nicely."

He looked extremely handsome. His dark hair fluffily styled to suit his face, the cologne on his dark dress robes floating up her nose. The color looked like a deep maroon, giving the appearance of almost black but the appearance of dark red seeping through. Similar to a rose that was left to be blessed by the heat of the Sun, shriveled petals from receiving too many of the star's flaming kisses.

He somehow managed to compliment her dress color. He had golden cuff links, like a royal family's emblem, secured at his wrists, his lean figure filling out his long jacket. A white undershirt peeking from his buttoned dress robes. She wished he wasn't so ravishing, it would make not having feelings for him much easier. 

He stared relentlessly at her underneath the candlelight. "You are just...wow. I didn't think you could get more beautiful, yet here you are."

(y/n) avoided his eyes, much too nervous to look into his hazel irises, much too broken to try. Although, she had forgotten the excitement of flirting with someone so new. 

Before she could muster up the courage to reply, Professor McGonagall's hands were wrapped around her wrist, dragging both her and Ivan towards the rest of the champions. 

Romilda awkwardly stood between her and Harry, earning more hatred from the seer. 

"Now, I'm sure you're all aware that it is custom for the Champions to open the ball with a dance." McGonagall announced, preparing to open the doors to the Hall. 

"Professor?" (y/n) chimed. "Not to interrupt, but, should I technically not be considered for this?"

McGonagall laughed, "Nonsense my dear. You were, after all, picked to be a Champion. Not to mention you've already participated in a task for Salizar's sake."

(y/n) nodding her head in understanding, remembered how this is what she and Harry had practiced for that one night. They had danced together and connected their souls through the music they used as an excuse to hold each other close. Practiced together in order to be able to be one under the decorations of the Yule Ball. Now they'll be with someone new, like everything between them never existed. 

The doors of the Great Hall creaked open to reveal the glamor of the room. The walls were frosted over with a delicate sparkle, like a box of bright cheer and formal Christmas spirit. The long tables were replaced with smaller ones that were lit dimly with lanterns and seated a dozen. Wreaths and pines were scattered about the walls and chandeliers, the occasional mistletoe making its way into the decorations. The ice that covered everything made the room bright and sleek, snow drifting from the star enchanted ceiling, gracefully surrounding the enormous Christmas tree that blessed the back of the room. 

As the music began, everyone whispered about the Champions and who they were with. Commonly the fact that Hermione was with Viktor and how Harry and (y/n) were for some reason not together. 

"Put your hand on my shoulders, (y/n)" Ivan whispered, resting a large hand on her waist lightly and grab her own with the other. 

"Oh, right sorry," she murmured.

"Is everything alright?" Ivan asked, as they skillfully floated around the glossy floors, the music floating into everyones ears like a drug for happiness. "You seem a bit distracted tonight. I was hoping this could be a good opportunity for us to get to know each other better."

(y/n) smiled, "Right, of course. I'm sorry, I've just been a bit distant. But, I'm all yours."

How could she focus, when right across from her Harry's hand was on Romilda's waist, his eyes drowning in hers. She watched him carefully. Why was he staring at her like that? Why did he seem so content with her in his arms? 

(y/n) kept watching him. 

Watch my heart burn, she thought, as you fall for her eyes the way you once fell for the reflection of the stars in mine. 

"So," Ivan boomed, lifting her up every once in a while, "how do you like it here at Hogwarts?" 

This was so painful. The conversation was forced, it didn't come with ease. "Oh, it's just fine. Great school, no doubt. It can get tricky a lot. Especially the visions it gives me."

A low chuckle slipped from Ivan's lips, "Visions? What do you mean by that?"

(y/n)'s eyes widened. She always forgets she has to conceal herself around others. "Uh, I just mean the dreams. You know, all the magic you see during the day really gives your imagination some nightmare fuel." She laughed nervously.

Ivan gave a stern nod. "Right."

The music thankfully stopped and (y/n) used it as an opportunity to excuse herself. "Ivan, could you excuse me for a second? I need to go freshen up."

She slipped away, observing the many tables.

Harry, Romilda, Hermione, Viktor, Ron, and Parvati were all sitting chattily at a table close by, enjoying the feast. (y/n) spotted the twins, Luna, and their dates sitting at another table quite far. So, naturally, she headed over there. 

"(y/n)!" Fred exclaimed. "What a lovely surprise. Care for some Firewhiskey?"

(y/n) snatched the cup out of his hand, "Gladly." 

After downing it, she took a clumsy seat next to George. "Tough night, wolfy?"

(y/n) looked at him perplexed. "Wolfy?" 

George chuckled, holding his hand out to Fred, who placed some sickles in his hand. "Sorry, Fred offered me three sickles every time I called you that tonight. No hard feelings." 

(y/n) rolled her eyes, "Right. Say Georgie, would he give me three sickles every time I called you Blotchy tonight?"

George sat upright, "Hey! You promised you wouldn't bring that up."

Angelina laughed, "I'm sorry, I must know the back story behind that."

(y/n) placed her chin on the palms of her hands, "Well, last week I gave George a Fever Fudge. Normally supposed to just give you a small fever to get you out of class, and let's just say he had some strange side affects with his skin-"

"Ok, ok," George said frantically, "I won't call you wolfy the rest of the night. Promise."

(y/n) laughed, getting up and taking the rest of Fred's Firewhiskey, "I'm just messing, George. Consider the whole thing forgotten."

She noticed Harry get up, leaving Hermione alone with Ron and Parvati. "Excuse me guys."

She rushed over, sitting next to her best friend. "Hermione, how's your date?"

Ron scoffed, earning an eye-roll from Hermione. "Viktor is perfect, thank you."

"Hardly. You just spent the past fifteen minutes just trying to teach the bloke how to pronounce your name," Ron grumbled, slouching solemnly in his seat. 

"He's Bulgarian, Ronald. The syllables aren't easy for him." Hermione scolded. "Anyways, how about Ivan?"

(y/n) buried her face in her hands, "Hermione, it's so hard. I can barely make conversation with him without having to force words out. I told him I was going to freshen up about ten minutes ago."

She looked around the room curiously. Ginny was trying to apologize for stepping on Neville's shoes, Hagrid was dreamily dancing with Madam Maxime (who had to keep him in line), and...Harry was laughing at something Romilda said. 

She could see Ivan, coming off the dance floor and looking around for her, unfortunately spotting her trying to hide herself behind Ron. He waved, walking over cheerfully. "There you are! I was beginning to think you got trapped in the bathroom."

(y/n) forced a smile, "Nope, I'm right here!" 

Ivan helped her up, "Care to dance? There's a slow song about to come on."

Her stomach churned. Great. Being up close and personal with the sight of Harry and Romilda gushingly swaying with each other. "Would love to!" 

She settled into Ivan's hands, trying to focus on the guy she actually came with. A slow tune with a soft melody began to play. The lighting a tad bit dimmer as the mood became very vulnerable. 

(y/n) rested her head on Ivan's chest, trying to fill the empty space in her heart with some sort of feeling of affection. 

As they spun slowly, she happened to make eye contact with Harry in the swim of people. He glanced at her over Romilda's shoulder, her back to (y/n), and as her head was on Ivan's chest, she was at the perfect angle to stay in the depth of his eyes. It was like time was moving slowly, like her eyes and his were glued together by some invisible force. 

Their eyes had the most devilish affair; Meeting in secrecy in a room full of people.

To burn with desire but keep quiet was (y/n)'s greatest punishment to herself. 

Time sped up again when Romilda kissed his cheek, causing his attention to be refocused elsewhere.

It was all too much. She tried to conceal her emotions, to push down how she was truly feeling this entire night, but she couldn't. Everything had been building up in her stomach, higher and higher, waiting for her to finally snap. To reach her breaking point.

This was it. A pain worse than when she found out her true mother was dead. Worse than her visions. Worse than slowly being abandoned by Astra and Vincent. 

It was crushing. Suffocating. (y/n) felt so hopeless and vulnerable. Like she was weak and there was nothing she could do to get him back. 

Everything they once were came flooding, like all of  her memories were being flashed in front of her, a vision to be reminisced, because the moments were just that. Just moments, that might be considered memories if they weren't so tainted with a bitterness that left a foul taste in her mouth. 

(y/n) ripped herself from Ivan with tears in her eyes, hurriedly walking off the dance floor, her feet and hands tingly as she struggled to breathe. Any noise being made or people talking to her were muffled, like background noise that wasn't actually there. The loud thud of her hand making contact with the doors of the Great Hall, her heels clicking sharply against the stone ground as she stormed down the empty corridors to try and find fresh air, the only sounds audible to her. To try and help herself stop suffocating on the warm air of her own burning soul. 

The winter air prickled her skin like little needles trying to sedate her from her own insanity. Why does she feel so crazy? Like everything is fine and she's being dramatic. Like the world is going to end in an instant. 

Maybe it will. 

Because if a crush rejected her, it wouldn't be the end of the world. But Harry rejecting her made it feel like the world was nothing but ending. 

The stars used their twinkling lights to mow over her skin like a gently attempt to calm her down. Like millions of them were surrounding her entirely, embracing her body in an attempt to comfort. 

As no eyes were on her, everything came crashing like the dams inside her finally crumbled too much. Her throat erupted sounds of cracking despair. The warm tears on her cheeks sizzling against her numb skin. Her knees made contact with the sparkling snow of wonderland, wetting parts of the fabric on her dress. 

She punched the snow, cursing the Universe, pleading for it to put her back together, to erase her feelings so that she could stop loving someone that can't be hers.

(y/n) was silently weeping while curled into herself for several minutes, before her name was yelled from the exit of the concrete archways. 

"(y/n)! Please, where are you?"

It was familiar. The frequency of it seemed to naturally put her breathing at ease. Her ears were still slightly ringing, not allowing her to pinpoint it. 

Hermione perhaps? Possibly Ivan. 

Her knees were dizzily separated from the snow as a pair of hands forced her to stand. They turned her around. 

Emerald green.

That's what she was met with. Harry's eyes of brilliant green and the way she could see the glow of moonlight within. She wanted to collapse into him. To breathe him in and feel his touch. For him to calm her down like he always would.

Now they just stare at each other while he keeps his distance, hands on either side of each arm. 

"Are you...alright?" He asked awkwardly.

She hated him. His face reminded her of how little he seemed to care. How quickly he left. So why does her heart still long for him if he's the reason why it's aching. 

(y/n) was quivering, partly because of the freezing weather and partly because of the sobbing she was trying to hold back. 

"What's so special about her, Harry?" She asked softly, her voice cracking.

"Nothing. She's not special. Not like yo-"

"Stop denying!" (y/n) erupted, sobbing in between words. "Oh Romilda's so lovely! Romilda, your girl. Why don't you want me like the other boys do?She's everything I'm not, Harry. My looks could never compare, she doesn't give you the burden of visions, she's sweet and just overall perfect in every way-"

"Will you listen to me for one moment!" Harry whined, ripping his hands off her arms and running his fingers through his hair. "I don't like her as much as you think-"

(y/n) yelled in frustration. She wouldn't listen to him. She didn't want to hear his excuses, the why's and the 'I'm sorry' speech. "Harry why did it come to this? I-I thought maybe...maybe you and I had something. When you asked me to the Yule Ball it seemed real and true, like you had truly felt it in your heart. Then you made it seem like it was a ploy just to bag Romilda. I just wanna know how she stole you away so quick? Harry I've told the stars about you. So why does Romilda-"

(y/n) was interrupted by his lips. In an instant, his hands were cupping her cheeks, his lips softly moving against her own. Everything vanished, like fire was sparked in her bones, like every part of her that came from a dead star was suddenly alive again. She wanted him closer, even though they were pressed against each other, they couldn't get close enough. 

The stars twinkled and the snow fell like a glittering curtain around them, sticking to their hair and decorating their eyelashes. 

He threaded his fingers into her hair, as the kiss stayed steady, stayed tender and true. 

This kiss made (y/n) taste 'forever' on her tongue. Something that could be eternal. She forgot how to breathe, and she felt that if she stopped kissing him, she would lose him.

Harry had been waiting for this moment. To feel her lips against his own, while her shampoo floated up his nose and accompanied the zoo of butterflies in his stomach. 

(y/n) (l/n). The girl of his dreams. 

It inspired the stars to burn brighter, for the angels to sing louder. It was magic that could not be replicated by the most powerful wand in the Wizarding World.

Harry reluctantly pulled away, their foreheads almost touching, his hands still cupping her face. Her burrowed his gaze into her beautiful irises, speaking in a low whisper, making are she felt what he was about to say. 

"I don't.Like.Romilda," Harry whispered sternly. He pulled away, laughing slightly. "I'm sorry...I just...you wouldn't let me speak." He was trying to piece together where on Earth he managed to have such confidence.

(y/n) stared dreamily at him, trying to process what had just happened. "It's...quite alright, Harry."

He stepped closer to her. "Believe me when I say, I don't like her. I'm telling the truth about what happened. I was in the common room, picking up my things, when she came in. She was asking me weird questions about Quidditch and classes. She 'tripped' and pulled the neck of my hoodie, making me fall on her. I tried to get up, but she kept pulling me down. That's what you saw, that's why I was in that weird position. I was going to fight for you, but you truly seemed way too angry to even believe me if I said anything. I figured space would be best for you. If I'm being honest...I, uh,...I was hurt when you said you were going with Ivan. Seeing you tonight, looking...beautiful and dancing with him instead. I understand where you were coming from, but I've been trying to win you over before he did."

(y/n) bit the inside of her lip as she tried to contain her smile, stepping closer to him.  "What are you saying Mr. Potter?"

Harry shifted awkwardly, shoving his hands in his pockets and looking off into the distance. "Well...I have feelings for you, (y/n). Really strong feelings. I totally understand if you don't feel the same, but often I find myself not being able to stop thinking about you. You're everything to me. Not only are you my best friend, but you also make me feel something that I've never experienced before." Harry shifted, the awkwardness in his body language and his voice somehow making the confession even sweeter. "I thought that we could even...see where this goes." Harry looked up panicked, "That is, if you feel the same way of course."

(y/n) laughed, brushing the hair from his eyes, "Harry I honestly don't know how you can be such an idiot sometimes. Why else would I get so upset over Romilda? I really, truly like you too. Like...a lot."

Harry smiled so big (y/n) could count his teeth, he leaned closer to her, trying to close the distance between their lips. 

She placed her index finger over his puckered lips. "Harry, I really do have feelings for you, but-"

"But?" Harry whined, looking as though his heart had been sliced in half.

"But," (y/n) continued, "I want to sort things out with everyone. I trust your word for it, I really do, but I just...want to hear it from somebody else you know?" 

Harry slumped, shoving his shoe into the snow. "Yeah...I understand."

Could she trust his word? Before anything becomes serious, she needs the absolute promise of the truth. She needs a forced confession

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

(y/n)'s dormitory was full of uncontrolled squeals and confessions that the dance provided.

"HE KISSED YOU?!" Hermione screamed, kicking her legs excitedly while she hugged her best friend. "Well, that's everything you've dreamed of!"

(y/n) smiled so hard her cheeks were sore, the butterflies not stopping since the kiss. "I know! We decided not to act on anything until I think about everything and sort out these visions, but now I know, Hermione. Harry Potter has feelings for me. He could've picked anybody, and he wants me."

Hermione bit her lips. "Viktor kissed me on the way back to the dorms...it was...aggressive, but so magical."

Now it was (y/n)'s turn to freak out, "Hermione! That's so amazing. Where did it happen?"

Hermione was blushing furiously, "Well, it wasn't as romantic as Harry's move. I mean come on under snowfall? Anyway, he was about to drop me off by the portrait hole, and he said I had a piece of glitter on my cheek. He leaned in super close, brushed it off with his thumb, and...well, I'm sure you can picture the rest."

It was what they both had dreamed for so long. Although Hermione had a bit of a fight with Ron, at least Viktor was there to help take her mind off of him. 

Meanwhile, Harry had described the whole thing to Ron in a daze, who gave him a fist bump and an encouraging, "Bloody hell. Nice one, Mate."

(y/n) could only wonder if this all was an unnecessary mess. There was a strange ting in her chest about Ivan. There was something off about him.

Whatever had happened with Romilda and Harry, she was going to get to the bottom of it.

At least now, she knows that the boy she's dreamed of for so long, thinks of her too.

She was his midnight muse, not his enemy.

-

-

a/n~ 

This chapter was so fun to write, and the kiss scene hello ?? I know the Yule Ball could've been written much better, but I am very busy with school and did the best I could 

But I'm back : ). Bear with me, I know this chapter is a little choppy and probably could be better, but I'm very rusty from not writing for so long.

If you're even still reading this book, I thank you, because I know that sometimes I go awhile without updating.

Love you guys or whatever <3

Until next time ~ i

Mrs.PotterSquad

#BEMSUPREMACY