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I bite a sigh as I walk past the chatter of the cafeteria to meet Jonathan in the photography room when Nancy Wheeler suddenly appears in front of me, blocking my path.

"Hey, have-uh, have you seen Barb today?" She asks nervously, her voice low.

I snap my gum into place at the back of my teeth as I stare back at her. Since I was late coming in from the middle school, I skipped first period all together missing the class Barb and I have together in the morning. A growing pit planted itself in my stomach when I hadn't seen her at the lockers the rest of the morning, but sometimes we just miss each other, so I decided to chalk it up to just that, for my sake and sanity. But considering what happened last night— my teeth grind together, stretching my gum, she probably just didn't feel good enough to come.

Though Barb never skips or misses school.

Maybe she didn't feel good. After trying beer for the first time, and cutting her hand, I assume that's why she left so quickly and probably why she didn't come to school. Because if I haven't seen her, which isn't rare, but Nancy Wheeler is bothering me, which is rare, that means Barb really isn't at school today.

Which is the rarest of everything.

"Have you?" Nancy thin brows pull together as she looks at me waiting for an answer, her question startling me back to the conversation she started in the first place.

"Since you're such a good friend, why haven't you seen her?" I ask pointedly. "She left the party you invited her to. And you seemed to have a good night without her." The words burn my throat as they fall out of my mouth before my brain can catch up to stop them. Why does it matter what she did at... with... last night. It doesn't.

My teeth tighten, my skin itches, and I close my fist in and out forcing last night's conversation out of my mind as it tries to slowly creep back into my memory.

"I'm sorry!"

"Why do I still have a drawer?"

My nails dig angrily into my palms.

"It wasn't like that." Nancy's quick to defend, shifting legs she glances around nervously.

I shrug. "What's it to me?"

She opens her mouth to say something then closes it, changing her mind.

What is it to me? I shouldn't have even been there. After all these yea-

"Is that all?" I rush out, biting the flesh inside my cheek until a chunk rips off and the copper taste reaches my tongue, making me feel slightly more at ease.

"I'm glad you were there. With Barb. For her." Nancy adds with a soft smile. Cause you weren't. But I guess neither was I... "I didn't know you and Steve knew each other." She says embarrassedly, cheeks reddening.

My skin crawls, and my nails break through the skin.

"We're don't." I tell her.

"I just assumed..." She trails off.

"Well don't." I bite out. "Did you bother me to ask about Barb, or about Steve." Saying his name felt like bile threatening to burn my esophagus. I need to get out of here.

"Barb." Nancy answers quietly. "Sorry."

"Well, I haven't seen her, and since you dragged her to a party on a school night where she drank for the first time and sliced her hand open, maybe she's at home or maybe she's just avoiding you because you ignored her most of the night to get boned." I snap at her, surprised I said more than three words as I'd rather lay out in the middle of the road than speak to anyone at school other than Barb or Jonathan, especially to Nancy Wheeler, but here the fuck we are.

With that I turn on my heel as she calls out to me 'it wasn't like that.' Who is she trying to convince? Because I know who she was with. And there's no way it wasn't like that. And thinking about that at all makes me want to rip my hair out.

It isn't so bad. It's scary, at first. Ripping out large chunks. But the sear and satisfaction of feeling the strands pull from your scalp. The sting, the burn, the slight pulse of pain after.

I forget about meeting Jonathan in the photography room and go straight out the doors and around the corner and pull out my lighter. Once my cigarette is lit I swallow, lifting up my pants leg I push it against my calf.

I'm not breaking my promise, I tell myself. I cigarette burn can't kill you. But guilt slowly seeps into my chest anyways. But Will isn't here. He wasn't at school this morning with the other boys to make laugh and give me a hug. He isn't here right now to tell me everything will be okay. And now Barb isn't at school...

I take drag, letting the smoke pour out of my mouth as I throw my head back against the brick, not hard enough to knock me out, unfortunately. I switch legs, ignoring the voice in my head screaming what would Will think if he found me right now?

Well, Will isn't here.

And everything is falling apart.

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Once lunch is over, and the bell has rang several times, I stuff the butt of my cig into the gravel and force myself off the ground. I fish into my bag for some loose change that's supposed to be lunch money and step up to the payphone once everyone else has filtered inside for class.

I punch in the number to Barb's house as I relish in the stagnant soreness coming from the bottom of my legs. I can barely feel it, but I know it's there, and my chest feels a little lighter than before. I just needed something to save me after the suffocating conversation with Nancy Wheeler.

"I didn't know you and Steve knew each other."

My grip around the phone tightens.

I knew his driveway, his house, his backyard, his room, the drawer like the back of my hand, still, after-

"Argh!" I kick the payphone pole, my converse bending as my toes smash into it. "Fuck!" Maybe I broke one, or three.

"Hello?" Marsha, Barb's mom, answers.

"Hey, Mrs. Holland." I force out, thankful for the throb in my foot to distract me. "Is, uh, is Barb there? Home sick?"

"No, no. She stayed the night with Nancy last night." Marsha says, worried reaching her voice. "Is she sick?" She didn't go home last night. She didn't go home last night. "JJ?"

The ringing in my ears subsides. "Oh, I just know she was feeling squeamish, and I missed her at lunch, so I just wondering if she was home sick. That's all." Lying is so easy if you do it enough. But I'm off my game.

Before her mom can say anything else the line goes dead and I pull back the phone realizing I didn't have as long since I only scrounged up one quarter instead of two.

Barb isn't at school. And she's not at home. Nancy hasn't seen her, but Barb left the party last night...

Right—?

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𝟶ʙᴜᴛᴛᴇʀʙɪsᴄᴜɪᴛ𝟽 sᴘᴇᴀᴋs!

Sooo... I did a thing...🤭🤭

I made the decision back in March to change the face claim of this oc... after 5 years... !!! And with that came a name change... I absolutely love the name Toni, but I kept attaching it to the old fc & feel like it didn't fit the new one, but I wanted to same vibe... sooo enter JJ!!🤭😭 (yes after JJ from OBX lol)

This is still the same oc, same personality, same story, same everything except she now has a new name & fc (which is Sophie Thatcher. Ik she has been getting used more for stranger things fics but she is literally the embodiment of JJ, fits the vibe/setting of stranger things, & looks a lottt like Dustin's mom, which is her mom)

Wanted to explain, sorry for the confusion of the new name for any of my readers who've been here!! I am in the process of editing the old chapters, fixing her name & where I describe her hair lol, so bear with me!!

This chap is veryyy important giving an insight to JJ as a character, her friendship with Barb, & her dynamic with Nancy!! JJ & Nancy very much give me Glinda & Elphaba vibes!! And I can't stop thinking of the loathing song for them!!

Soooo welcome back!! Happy late 4th of July & happy late 6 years to S3!! I hope y'all enjoyed this chap & enjoy the new fc/name!! Don't be afraid to comment your thoughts, questions, & reactionsss!! And until next time... mwah!! NEW MOODBOARDS WILL ALSO BE COMING SOONNN ;)