Kim Taehyung

With a quick movement, Jeongguk had lifted me onto his wide desk in his study and greedily let his tongue glide over my pale neck, pulling a wet trail of saliva from my chin to my Adam's apple. "Mhm~," I gasped with relish and threw my head back so the man -my whole body longed for- could kiss me better.

After our kiss in school, which had become quite demanding at a certain point, we rushed to Jeongguk to continue. I didn't know where this urge to have sex came from, but it didn't bother me.

The two of us just had the pure desire left for each other. We just wanted to feel each other with every inch again to let out our feelings, which we had locked all those weeks.

Nevertheless, there was one little thing that bothered me a little. While Jeongguk pampered me with his warm tongue, made me feel good and let me forgot the memories of those bad weeks, he didn't touch me with his masculine, strong hands, but had placed them next to my thigh's on the beautiful desk.

To be honest, I wanted him to touch me intensively again, as always. I missed his hands on my body, which were running over it or touching every area so gentle.

Therefore, I detached myself from him with a heavy heart -although I just wanted to carry on and finally feel him- and carefully squeezed his shoulders so he had to look me in the eyes. A confused expression lay over his face and he licked the excess saliva from the corners of his mouth away before tilting his head a little.

Jeongguk didn't seem to understand why I kept him from letting me feel good. "Why don't you touch me, Jeongguk? You've never actually been able to keep your hands off me, but now...",, I breathed softly, with a slightly hurt undertone in my voice, and spread my legs a little bit, so Jeongguk could stand between them and we were closer.

I could feel his warm breath on my slightly heated skin.

But instead of giving me an answer, he immediately turned his head away from me so he hasn't to look me in the eyes anymore. His fingertips clawed themselves into the wood of the white table and he closed his eyes, trying to detach himself from me, but I stopped him by holding him tight by his broad shoulders.

It hurt me to see that he removed from me and, once again, had secret that he didn't want to tell me. I knew instinctively that he kept something from me and didn't dare to tell me, although he would have to know by now that I had never condemned or hated him because of anything.

After all, I had stayed with him when he didn't even want to have a relationship. I had forgiven him for the slap too, so why was he afraid to tell me about this feelings?

Gently, I placed my dainty hand on his striking chin as I let go of one arm and turned his flawless face back to me to press a loving kiss on his addictive lips. It was a very short one, yet it clearly stated that Jeongguk had nothing to be afraid of and I had already forgiven him for everything he had done.

"Tell me... Why don't you want to touch me?", I asked against his full lips and then drove my thumb over his soft cheek which felt so cold under my fingers. But Jeongguk lowered his gaze and stared absent at his rough palms, where I could see a few scratches and injuries -probably from fights- before he clenched his hands to fists and took a deep breath.

"These hands have the life of a person, namely that of my former girlfriend, on their consciences. These hands have already hurt so many people who have even been hospitalized. These hands hurt you and even bruised your wrist. Other people would probably never approach me, but you forgave me all this shit. You're too wonderful, I just can't touch you, Kim Taehyung. I would either just dirty you. You shouldn't be touched with those bad hands...", he murmured in uncertainty and then closed his eyes.

He bit his lips and turned away from me again. Hell no, I would never reject him in any way. But his loving words only made my poor little heart beat faster and the fact that he thought about something like that...

I couldn't describe what he did to my feelings, which had been so often on the merry-go-round because of him, but the wonderful warmth in my chest suggested that his words had made me happy.  With a smile on my lips I took his big hand, still shaped into a fist, into mine and Jeongguk jerked a little.

Seeing that he was bad-mouthing himself and claiming that I was too perfect for him made me sad. Jeongguk was not a bad person.He was perfect and I loved him with all his corners and edges.

Therefore, I timidly placed his hand on my small bulge -which made Jeongguk bite his lower lip- and softly breathed into his ear, "Your hands are the only ones I want to be touched by in my most sensitive and private places..."

• ────── ✾ ────── •

Author's note: I'm finally back uwu ❤️💕
And I am ready to update for you, my sweet dreamers, again! :)
I hope you're enjoying the last chapters~

~ ggukstaee 🌺