Russia pov

"CAN YOU ALL STOP SCREAMING?! PLEASE...

PAKISTAN AND INDIA STOP FIGHTING...

TURKEY!  STOP BOTHERING GREECE...

O MY GOD ARMENIA AND AZERBAIJAN ENOUGH NOW PLEASE...

...

I give up ".

UN sighed after shouting into the microphone for two hours in an attempt to calm the various disputes between the countries so that we can begin the assembly. Each time it is the same story, we never manage to do anything because of these differences. Plus, along with the countries that do not get along, there are also countries with economic problems or those who do not give a damn about all this. Normally I would also be one of those who argue with everyone, especially with my sister Ukraine, with the most of the countries of Eastern Europe, with Turkey and of course with America. Let's say that I don't have a good reputation, many countries are afraid of me and I have to "thank" my father for that. Unfortunately the countries don't understand that I am not him , for them I am nothing more than his descendant, useless as I try to prove otherwise, I will always be seen as an oppressive country. I would like to change but my politicians do not seem willing to do so, I cannot deny the fact that I'm not a good country with good rules, I should change but I don't know how.

"GENTLEMENS, COULD WE AT LEAST TALK ABOUT ONE POINT ON THE LIST?"  asked EU taking the paper and microphone from UN's hand as NATO shook his head in disappointment.

"AT LEAST OF COVID".  Silence fell for a moment hearing the name of that damned virus, then a voice raised from the side of the room opposite to mine."STOP TALK ABOUT IT, WE ALL KNOW THAT IT WAS CHINA WHO WANTED TO KILL ME".

America stood up and China's response was not long in coming. "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! ACCORDING TO YOU I CREATED A VIRUS TO DESTROY YOU, OH PLEASE AMERICA, YOU NEED JUST YOURSELF TO DESTROY YOU". "WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE I AM THE STRONGEST AND THEREFORE THE ONLY ONE TO MY EQUAL ".  And from there tragedy.  All the countries began to scream who against America, who to protect him, who used the noise to shout stupid things, who instead managed to sleep despite all the mess. In short, nothing was understood.  I rested my head on my folded arms and without realizing it my attention slowly diminished.

I remembered an episode that happened to me many years ago when I was about twelve and my father took me to the woods near our house for a walk.  We saw many different animals and among them the bear struck me more than the others.  His dark brown fur felt soft, I wanted to hug and caress him so much but my dad smiled at me and shook his head.  He told me that the bear is a powerful animal, sometimes solitary and above all unpredictable.  From that moment on I told my father that the bear would be my guide animal and he laughed, what we didn't know is that soon he would become my national animal.  That's one of the last happy memories I've had with my father.

Unfortunately he died two years later and his death destroyed me, morally and physically.  He left me alone with a country torn apart by an internal crisis, which had lost its dominions over Europe and Asia and which had numerous other problems.  I was only fourteen years old and in addition to my country, I had to take care of newly born Kazakhstan and Belarus of just 4 years old.  Ukraine was a year younger than me but still he was not responsible as I must have been.  I felt that my father had given me a task and I would have completed it.  All this work ended up destroying me completely, I closed myself even more in myself making me and my country seem unreliable, a country that it wasn't safe to make friends or agreements.

Seeing all other countries laughing with their friends, even outside their politics, while you are left behind and isolated from everyone is depressing and disheartening. You feel as if everyone is always one step ahead of you, as if everyone is better than you as you sink deeper and deeper into your anguish.  It's awful...

If my father hadn't abandoned me so soon maybe ...

"Hey Russia, what are you doing asleep? ~ Hahahah".

Lifting my head and turning it I saw UK and a couple of other countries with which my relationship was not bad but horrible. "If one day we had to talk only about all the problems you have, one meeting wouldn't be enough hahaha" he added laughing again.  I gritted my teeth and turned my head to the side so as not to look at him. "What are you doing, don't you answer? Are you too scared? ~".  I looked down, why me among all the present? "Maybe he's waiting for his daddy to come and save him," said a voice who joined the group and whose accent I obviously recognized.

Lifting my eyes slightly I saw him and he could only be Finland. "I still remember when you were proud of your father, thinking that he was the strongest country in the world and even if he had many cars and a big army he couldn't beat me .. .

Your father was nothing. "

I felt my eyes fill with tears and the anger inside me began to be felt.  Having my head down, they couldn't see me but this position also made me seem weaker ...

as if I was submissive to them, but I am not, and yet I could not find the strength to look them in the eye.

All I thought of them was that no matter what they do, they would be still ahead and better than me in everything.  The only strength I found was to express a faint "Shut up".

"Oh did you say something? ~ I didn't really hear you."  Now the tears were starting to fall and I couldn't let them see me like this, no, not now.  I glimpsed another country approaching us, he was wearing jeans and a black T-shirt with NATO written on it, I didn't need to raise my eyes even more to understand who he was, only one person could have dressed like that.  I no longer cared if America made fun of me too, it couldn't get any worse.  I was already preparing for the teasing about me and the tears that were about to be more evident but America stoped in front of me. "Come on let's go eat I'm starving."  I stood still and shocked, I raised my head and saw America going away taking his father with him and the other countries, there was no one in front of me and all the other nations were leaving the building.

"Russia do we have to go or do you want to stay there like a stockfish for the rest of the day? And why are you crying?".  I looked at Ukraine still shocked, America not raging on me?  This day has at least something good.  I quickly wiped away my tears and went out with her.  I know that my relationship with her is not the best but she is still my sister and I love her anyway.  When I got out, however, I had to face reality and feel as I have always felt: alone.

All the countries have a group to laugh with and grab a bite to eat, but I didn't, I didn't have anyone.  I looked around the square in front of the countryhumans headquarters, looking for Ukraine but I saw her talking to Poland and Hungary.  My heart shattered, even though I showed myself strong I could not oppress my feelings forever.  I ran as fast as I could and hid in an alley near the square and there I dropped with my back to the wall.  I doubt anyone saw me because ...

even if they did, no one would really care.  Tears finally gushed from my eyes, wetting all my clothes.  Why me, I don't understand, why am I so cold ?, why I never do something right ?, why ...

I can't be similar to the others ... ".

I brought my knees to my chest, hugged them tightly and put my head in my arms letting out the sobs I had held inside me for so long.

Suddenly the earth began to shake, I slowly raised my head and saw pebbles on the ground moving and bouncing.  I looked at them with a certain intensity not understanding what was happening. "AAAAAAH", "RUN", "NOOOO".

I jumped when the screams of the other countries reached me, I could hear them running and screaming from all sides.  I got up too ready to run and go in search of my siblings, if something happened to them I would never forgive myself.  At one point, however, I heard a crash and I realized that the buildings were collapsing.  A piece of concrete fell in front of me, I did not even have time to raise my head that the building collapsed on my head.  I only managed to jump to avoid the bulk of the rubble, but a piece hit me anyway and I fell to the ground.  I saw everything blurry and slowly my vision worsened until I saw nothing.  I only heard the screams of others fade away more and more until I couldn't hear them no more.

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I had planned the prologue for 800 words and I got 1660 but oh well.  I hope to write this book better and to be able to continue it without interrupting each chapter for three months, I hope you read it and nothing see you at the next first chapter that I will publish very soon, goodbye.