Jayson: Part II

Monica sobbed into Jayson's chest. Between hiccups, she sent snot into the fabric, mixed with loud, messy tears.

"What the fuck? Taylor said you were dead; he heard it on the long range radio!"

"I'm sorry," he whispered, holding her by the waist with one arm while his other hung limp at his side. His voice was no less emotional and shaky as he kissed her forehead, nose, and lips. "Benson couldn't know; he sent his goons after me, and I would have died if it weren't for the survivors here. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Still shaking with sobs, Monica closed her fingers around Jayson's sweatshirt. "I can't decide if I'm angry or relieved. You're such a jerk sometimes!"

Eli, who'd been standing near Monica, cleared his throat and backed away. "I'm gonna give y'all some privacy."

His expression was both troubled and calm, as if sensing something but not sure yet what made him uneasy. Jayson still didn't understand how Eli's little mind thing worked, but didn't rule out the possibility of extrasensory abilities. Zombies had been considered impossible, yet now they were real, so why not psychics?

"Everything okay?" Jayson asked, wondering what Eli would reveal.

"For now," Eli returned cryptically. "There's definitely someone else on the way here, but I don't..." He paused to glance uneasily at Monica. "I think your friend will be okay. Maria will do everything she can to help, and she'd started fixin' him up before I went and brought your girl here."

Possible translation: Eli believed Taylor would pull through but was definitely concerned about pursuit and retaliation from the facility. The man wasn't familiar with Monica at all though, and Jayson wouldn't be surprised if that was why he wasn't forthright with an outsider. He'd seemed embarrassed when Jayson had found out, but that had been different because everyone here simply accepted whatever Eli's ability was as a quirky, yet acceptable trait.

Over Monica's hair, Jayson made eye contact with Eli and nodded. "Thanks, buddy. We won't be long."

Shuffling out of the room over the dusty floor, Eli left them alone.

Jayson closed his eyes as he stroked Monica's hair. "I know I was a jerk. It's one of the many things I'm trying to work on, and I don't deserve anyone's forgiveness: most of all yours or Taylor's." He paused for a moment, growing rigid as he rested his palm on the small of her back. "Where is he? Is... is he safe?"

She nodded, sniffing though heavy snot in the frigid air. "I think so. He's lost a lot of blood; Wheeler shot him during our escape. He passed out on the way here though, so we aren't sure how much longer he'll last without medical attention."

Maria was a capable nurse, and if Eli said Taylor would be okay, he had to hope for the best.

The assurance did little to help though, and Jayson cursed. The action pinched his rib though, and he gasped, making Monica step back and inspect him. She noticed he favored his side as he sucked in his breath and held it, clearly in pain. "What happened?"

Now that Monica had released him, Jayson winced when his ribs expanded to allow him to breathe. "It's a long story, but I spent the first day trekking across the high desert until I found a boarded up gas station. Hid out in the backroom for the night and woke up to two of Benson's soldiers outside. They couldn't get through the boards, and the door was locked, so they weren't able to find me, but they were killed not even five minutes later by a coyote."

Monica swallowed. "Um, was it... rabies, or...?"

Jayson knew what she was asking, and he nodded. "Yeah... it... I didn't have a choice." His throat turned dry, and he tried to swallow as gruesome images returned. The memory of rot and blood stung his nose as his ears rang from the shots he took to finish the coyote and the poor soldier screaming for his mother.

His head swam, and it wasn't until he swayed, Jayson said, "Yeah, it was affected by the virus. The soldiers barely had time to scream."

Monica nodded and was silent for a moment as Jayson watched the mental gears shift through her eyes. Then, she whispered, "That explains a lot. Taylor heard the radio broadcasts, and we only knew two soldiers had been killed. Now, I understand why."

She hugged Jayson more gently this time and rubbed his back. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

At first, Jayson froze. He knew he wasn't forgiven—not by a long shot, but it was nice to hold his girlfriend again. Even now, he couldn't bring himself to believe she was real.

Pressing his cheek against her hear, he inhaled her feminine scent and closed his eyes. "I never wanted to kill anybody," he whispered. "Not in Afghanistan or Iraq, and not here in the desert. I'm so fucking tired of war and all the destruction that comes with it."

Like it or not; phrase it however people wanted, this was a war of a different kind. A war against humanity was still war, and nothing had changed since his time overseas. Humans were fighting zombies, but these zombies had been people once too before everything had been ripped away from them. Innocent people still got hurt, and people in authority still wanted to keep that power.

After it became clear in the silence Monica didn't plan to ask anymore questions, Jayson relayed the rest of the story, telling her about driving out to Elko, breaking his rib, and the locals bringing him into their fold. The only part he left out was what he'd intended to do to himself with the spare rifle. The last thing Monica needed on her plate was his PTSD and mental breakdown. She had dealt with enough in that facility with Benson constantly breathing down her neck.

By the time he finished, they sat on a pair of beanbag chairs, hand in hand. Monica chewed on her lip and stared at an unknown focal point for several moments before speaking again and sadly shaking her head. "I can't imagine how stressful this has been on you, especially off your meds. Diego told me on the way here, he found out Benson had withheld them despite having more than enough to treat your condition. General Reyes had stocked up on medications with the soldiers in mind, and it all went to waste."

Jayson rolled his eyes and grunted. "Figures. That bastard is up to something; I just don't know how to make people understand."

"We understand now," she said quietly as she kept her gaze on the ground. "We knew from the beginning something wasn't right, but there were so many pieces in play that it was impossible to pick everything out of the overall conspiracy."

Fighting the urge to sigh, Jayson slowly pushed himself up. The movement was excruciating, stealing his breath and bringing tears to his eyes, but he managed with a pained grimace before glancing toward the building's exit. "Can I see him?"

He'd decided to change the subject instead of harping on what he'd known since Day One. Benson was a creep, and a deranged one at that. He'd tried to warn his friends, and make it clear this guy was the enemy, but his emotions had been too jumbled for him to be taken seriously.

On the other hand, he understood the danger Monica had been in. Benson had made it clear he wanted her, and would take her by any means necessary. He didn't have any doubt the man would pursue her or Taylor, who were becoming more like trophies in a fox hunt.

Monica climbed to her feet and sighed. The flickering candlelight cast shadows, accentuating her exhaustion in her saggy eye bags and slimmer cheeks. The light revealed tiny crow's feet Jayson hadn't noticed before the apocalypse. How long had it been? A month? Two? Jayson couldn't remember, but he had never seen Monica so disheveled.

Pursing her lips and rubbing them together, she inhaled through the nose before responding. "Jayce, I don't know. Taylor isn't in good shape, and though I think he would forgive you, I'm not sure Diego would be thrilled to see you after what happened."

And there it was; the elephant in the room. Entirely Jayson's fault, of course; he couldn't argue that what he done wasn't wrong. He had hit Taylor, and Jayson couldn't forgive himself for what had transpired at the facility. He couldn't take it back either, and Taylor deserved to hear the apology from him, even if Diego didn't want him in the same room.

"I don't answer to Diego," Jayson declared, deciding to take his chances.

If Diego punched him, fine. He could live with that. Physical violence might have been frowned upon before the apocalypse, but it was how he'd grown up, learning through observing other boys at school as they met at the park in their leisure hours and settled things with their fists. It was an old-fashioned practice, but every civilized rule had gone out the window the moment the world fell apart, anyway.

Monica shrugged. "I don't want to argue. Just don't say I didn't warn you."

As promised, she didn't push the subject. Instead, she grabbed the candle and used it as she carefully led Jayson out of the storage room.

Passing a shelf, Jayson noticed a row of mass produced garden gnomes one would find at a dollar store. Bearded men in a variety of brightly colored hats and elderly smiling woman stared back at him. It was creepy, but also a silly reminder of life before the apocalypse. They reminded him of the ugly troll he'd kept on their porch at home, dropping its pants to pee as saggy, pasty buttcheeks hung over the brown breeches. Jayson loved it because people either laughed or asked why they had a hideous troll on the porch in plain sight.

The truth? It held their spare key in the hollowed-out feet.

The gnome that caught Jayson's attention on the shelf was of a man dressed down to his undies on a stripper pole, with deformed facial features and chipped paint, as if the glass blower couldn't be bothered for quality over quantity. It was ugly, with yellow garments and a brown beard instead of white, and a green hat the color of peas.

"What are you looking at?" Monica asked as Jayson perused the shelf.

He grinned and held up the gnome, making her laugh. "I need a souvenir."

She chuckled and shook her head before watching him with hopeful eyes. "So, does this mean you're coming with us?" She pointed to the gnome and added, "You can bring the decoration too, but I don't want to see it."

Monica spoke as if they were still partners, giving Jayson a tiny sliver of hope. But then he thought of his other obligation and forced himself to keep smiling.

Honestly, where he went now was up to Billy. Jayson hadn't expected to see his friends again—had essentially told himself it wouldn't happen, and accepted Billy's offer because he had nowhere else to go. Now? He wanted to go with them, but wasn't sure if the group wanted him. And Jayson had promised to help train the residents on how to safely use and maintain weapons. He'd hoped once he was better to teach them basic survival skills as well to help with foraging. With the winter approaching, the survivors needed to think about shelter and food as well as barricading themselves from gangs and looters.

Either way, he couldn't realistically integrate himself into both groups.

"I guess that depends on how things go tonight," he answered, somewhat honestly, considering the circumstances.

Whether Monica believed or doubted him, she didn't comment as they exited the building and walked toward the run down motel. She did chuckle a bit though once they were out in the cool, open air. "You and your weird collections. Where do you plan to keep that gnome?"

"Somewhere annoying."

Monica laughed. "Sounds about right. I never thought I'd miss your weirdness or your little soap wars. I don't miss the ugly troll on your porch."

"If we'd gotten married, I'd have brought that along, you know."

Glancing up at him, she smirked and looped her arm around his waist. "I would expect nothing less. But you do realize the living room and kitchen would be my domain in that scenario, right?"

"I expect nothing less from a perfect woman."

Though she scoffed and rolled her eyes, Monica didn't hide her grin. "Don't try to flatter me. You're still in trouble; I'm just putting your punishment on pause until we get somewhere safe. Then I want to have a serious discussion."

Fair enough. Jayson would be concerned if she didn't want to talk; a healthy relationship depended on respect, honesty, and open communication. She deserved that much from him, even if she later chose to walk away.

At the palisade, several survivors gathered at the gate, carrying weapons or talking quietly amongst themselves, but keeping a lookout for the threat Eli had warned about. Billy caught his eye, and when his gaze traveled to Monica, his glare softened as understanding settled into his features. Jayson wasn't sure where Billy stood on the LGBTQA+ issue, but he seemed protective of his younger brother, and Jayson belatedly realized the older sibling had been concerned about whether he needed to keep the outsider away. Not because he was a threat to their settlement, but because he'd wanted to keep his brother's heart safe from anyone who might take advantage.

With a slight wave, Jayson leaned into Monica (without crushing her) and guided her to the motel. "You know you probably can't stay long without Benson sending his people after you."

"I know."

Which meant they'd probably have to hightail it out of there the moment Maria finished with Taylor. "You'll need to be ready to go at a moment's notice. Benson won't give up just because you aren't here."

"Trust me, I'm aware," she whispered. "There's a lot you don't know yet, but I need to find a cure before things get really bad."

Because zombies weren't already bad? He agreed that Monica and Taylor needed to get far away, though.

"What's going on?"

Before she could get the words out of her mouth, the door to Maria's office opened. Diego stepped onto the gravel and did a double take when he noticed Jayson. Like a switch, his demeanor had flipped from panicked concern in wide eyes to a narrowed glare and bared teeth. "You son of a bitch."

~*~

The ugly garden gnome was submitted by bigfivedonaldduckfan
Thanks for the suggestion!

If you'd like to see an object or scenario, let me know here in the comments! I love reading your thoughts and feedback

If you liked this chapter, don't forget to vote and share! Thank you all so much for reading!