Aries: I crashed my motorbike

Taurus: This idiot forgot to stop when I was crossing the road

Gemini: I'm here with my friend

Cancer: I was cooking soup for my boyfriend, and I spilled it all over me, and now I have third-degree burns

Leo: Someone called me ugly, so I tried to punch them, and I hit a brick wall

Virgo: Um, I work here

Libra: I had a panic attack

Scorpio: Someone pushed me down the stairs

Sagittarius: This old lady was on her motor scooter, and she was going so slowly, so I told her to hurry up. She did, and she ran over my toe

Capricorn: I was working really late 5 nights in a row, so I got sleep deprivation, and I passed out

Aquarius: I was walking with my mermaid, then she pushed me into a well and I found myself in Narnia

Pisces: I was concentrating then smashed into a wall, I got a concussion