The signs as criminals:

Aries: Assassin

Taurus: Money Laundering

Gemini: Con-Artist

Cancer: Psychopathic Killer 

Leo: Violent Protest Leader

Virgo: Burglar

Libra: Murderer

Scorpio: Cult Leader

Sagittarius: Pick Pocket

Capricorn: Fraud

Aquarius: Hacker

Pisces: Drug Dealer