Tuesday - 10:23 p.m.
May 4, 2015

The day I left the states was the day my new life begun, and let me tell you..it wasn't pretty. Turns out Enzo was as real as me.

He's an obsessive lunatic, a different breed of human as I like to say. I attempted a total of 12 missions to kill him and 24 missions to escape. All which had been big failures.

When I first arrived in his house I was forced to sleep in the same bed with him. Now I don't sleep in the same bed as him since I nearly killed him with a pen our first night. What can I say? I don't like being held up against my will.

Enzo knew everything about anything, what makes him worse is that he's a psychopath himself. In fact i think he's worse than me.

He killed my brother just to get me, I was his 'wife' that died. When I had finally gotten in his hands the first thing he did was wed me.

The wedding was a disaster, I ruined it by killing nearly everyone while still wearing my wedding dress. He was furious and to teach me a lesson, I got no food for 3 months.

I rebelled against everything he said and he punished me for it. I'm not gonna lie he is attractive but he doesn't attract me.

I'd seen him kill at least 30 people a day, it didn't bother me for the first few weeks but for some reason it eventually did.

Every scream and cry for help that leaves his victim's mouths went directly to my heart. At first i was confused as to why I was feeling like this so I pushed it aside.

The pain my heart felt was weird and familiar, it grew the more he killed and that's when I realized. I'm caring.

By the fourth month of living with him, he changed. His obsession with me seemed to have all of a sudden disappear. Though he barely noticed me, I was still in his captivity.

He began bringing home women every night and from their pleading looks I knew they didn't want to be with Enzo.

Beginning to embrace my new trait, I chose to act on it. So one night Enzo came home, drunkenly dragging a stripper by her hair into his room.

The room door shut close and eventually the woman's loud screams were heard. I couldn't take it anymore so I ran into his room.

He was just about to penetrate the woman before I barged in. I ran to him and punched his jaw. He trembled back, shocked that I was even helping the woman.

I told the woman to hurry up and leave before he actually rapes her. The second she left the room, Enzo had grabbed my arm. His tight grip cut off the blood circulation in my arm.

Before i can make my next move he threw me on the bed.

"If you didn't want me to have sex with her, you could have just told me, my beautiful wife."

He said those words before he raped me. That night was the biggest change of my life.

"Mommy?"

I heard my little boy say before my eyes landed on him, he was standing in the dark as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.

As much as I want to speak to him, I can't and he understood that.

He walked closer to me and cocooned himself in my arms. I was sitting on the ground in the furthest corner of our small studio apartment.

It wasn't the best living conditions, but it was home. I gave birth to him in here, all of his first moments were in here, I had my many downs in here, and we grew together in here.

The landlady has been helping me since she found me in here during my labor hours. She helped me deliver my baby and kept us safely tucked away from the Italy society.

Enzo has spies everywhere looking for me ever since I killed everyone in his house and burned it down while he was on a business trip.

Zain looked in my eyes as he twitched his nose slightly. My body crossed it's index and middle fingers then pointed it at his chest.

Zain smiled, "Kimi taught me how to count past 30." He said happily.

I got stuck again 2 years ago when Zain was 3, I was afraid that my second would not care about Zain and let him die. But she did the opposite, though she still doesn't talk, her and Zain have their own sign language.

Zain was confused at first when I wasn't talking but he found a way to get my second talking.

It was his idea to use sign language, well his made up version of it. It was and is a great idea.

Zain moved his head to the left then up, my body moved its head right then down. He frowned, "But that's not fair, you never get sleep." He said sadly.

It was the truth, letting my guard down will lead to me losing him and I don't want to lose him. If Enzo finds him, who knows what he'll do. As much as I don't want to admit it, I'm scared of him.

No one has ever brought me fear but Enzo, which is why I have to stay up and watch over Zain. Enzo comes like a thief in the night and always leaves with his prize.

He will never touch Zain, never.

My body placed its thumb on Zain's right eye and slid it away. Zain gave me an understanding sad look, we kept no secrets from Zain.

He knew everything and us, from our good times to our bad times. "Mommy, when will we go see grandpa?"

My body drew a circle with a dot in the middle on Zain's neck.

One day

~