Lehar_2010

Title: 8/10

The title 'Sutures' is unique, that for sure and also matching to the theme of plot I assume. It tells as to how a broken Avni gets stitched (helped and healed) by Neil.

What lacked though?

The word was new enough to captivate the readers, but some might not want to go ahead for one reason- the meaning written in the blurb.

For that, you can just add an adjective which suits with 'Sutures' and also complements the plot. (A two word title in short).

Cover: 8.5/10

The cover is brilliant. Gives necessary vibes, feelings and the font plus the filter is also worth appreciation.

However, you can try changing the font of the author's name and also give a little blur effect to the rose.

Btw, who made your cover? You yourself?

Blurb: 4/10

So, apart from the meaning of the word there was nothing in the blurb. It would be better if you just extend the blurb letting the first line as it is.

You can always add some quotes that match the theme of your book and characters. You can add se controversial and curious dialogues. You can add some curious characteristics of the protagonists. And at the last, you can add some questions to invoke the quench for the mystery in Avni for the readers to find.

Plot: 11/15

Background: The plot background and the theme looks promising. Various hints here and there make us believe that Avni is definitely a mystery and even a dangerous mystery.

Hints are upto the place I believe that once the suspense will be opened, readers would berate themselves for not taking in the hints. I have no qualms as such with the background so.

Execution: The plot although looked great, couldn't be so well implemented. The hints are there I reckon, but I feel they lack fluidity.

Emphasis was needed. So that what you think can be depicted graphically well for the readers to feel exactly what you want them to through the characters.

I feel that you have excelled with in descriptions from your other works, but there is always a room for being more descriptive.

Readers feel more connected when dialogues are not not just told or the scene is not just briefed but also conveyed graphically.

For eg: (not from your book)

"The scene looked so terrifying that it made me nervous."

Instead,

"The scene was implicitly terrifying that sent chills down my spine as if I was meeting one of my lookalikes."

Flow and Pace: 10/15

I feel you have improved in this section a lot too. The book has a reasonable pace but maybe if you can just slow it down a little bit, not for the sake of detailing bit so that the characters can adjust to the surroundings.

I will explain it better in the character development.

For the flow, I feel the flow was also a little disrupted When you just start a book, it should be planned and well though of, so that even small things or efforts you made look promising.

For eg. We know Neil has a meeting with Mr. Khan, if it would be shown in just a line in a previous chapter that Neil was just expecting some sort of meeting or what was the context of the meeting, that would have created a great impact.

Grammar: 12/15

I think you have well to do grammar. Minor typos, happen with everyone.

What can you improve more though?

Try to write the dialogues while enclosing in the semi-colons.

Eg: "My pleasure ma'am", Neil said bowing to the lady in gratitude.

Instead of

Neil: My pleasure ma'am.

You can pay attention to punctuations also. Because sometimes you forget to write full stops or other punctuations at the end of a dialogue or sentence.

Otherwise, everything works I guess.

Character Development: 9/15

Character development and arc is the most important thing for me or any reader in a story.

Your characters had a good beginning but their characters sometimes lacked common sense or relatability to the real life.

Why would Neil be so concerned about Avni, a stranger, suddenly? Let their relationship progress.

Why would Nikki be so concerned too? She was just a mere stranger (ok an acquainted stranger) I guess? I guess a neighbour too? But, the text doesn't support the dynamic of their relationship you want to showcase.

And when Rhea says that she tried and after a point of time, things just flowed simply with everyone busy in their lives. I think you should have given that a little time and description.

If Avni's friends and Nikki could have thought of some time spent with Avni before she became so, the reminiscence would have brought relatability to the characters.

Uniqueness: 4/5

The concept you want to present looks good, promising and not Cliché. Brilliant!

P.S. This is a great jump from your all the works and I wish you the best for it.

PPS. I know I am hella late but in 11th, it really took me some time to accept that yes, I have 5 days school and 2 days coaching making it no free day for me at all. Really sorry for that!

Hope it helps~