"...In other news, two murders have occurred this week. Christopher Angelos and Bill Fischer were stabbed to death in their home yesterday night sometime between eight to ten PM. Their bodies were discovered after their neighbor, who wished to be called "Ren", spotted a mysterious figure exiting the house late at night with a knife and promptly called 911. The figure is believed to be Remy Cafe, a recent jail escapee who was imprisoned for the murder of five of his classmates in high school. There has been no evidence found yet that Cafe was the one who committed the murder, but the police are speculating and tests are being done at the scene of the crime. If you have any information that could be in any way useful to the investigation, please call your local police department. More on that later at seven...-"

Patton curled himself into a ball on the couch as Logan quickly shut off the TV. Patton felt his husband place a comforting hand on his shoulder, but Patton just gulped, staring ahead.

"Are you alright, honey?" Logan asked softly. He knew his husband was definitely in pain because of this. Surprisingly, even though Logan had recently made friends with both of the recently-murdered men mentioned on TV, he wasn't really grieving. He never really grieved death. It barely phased him anymore.

It definitely phased Patton, though. But Patton wasn't really thinking about Christopher and Bill, either. He wasn't even thinking about the fact that if he slipped up at any point during his murder scheme, he'd be easily found out. He wasn't thinking about the fact that someone had witnessed him walking out of the house, and called the police. Oh no...

He was thinking about how he was assumed to be Remy.

"Uh... I... I don't know." Patton eventually answered his husband. That was true- he wasn't really sure.

He tried so desperately to be his own person. To be a good person. He just wanted to make Logan happy, keep Logan alive, keep Logan close at all times. He thought that doing that was just being him. Being Patton. It was for good, right? Patton did all that he did for good. Remy did it for bad. But there's no difference to the authorities. Patton might as well go get his name changed right now.

Was he becoming the man he wanted to destroy?

Logan sighed, sliding his arm around his husband's shoulders, knowing that Patton craved affection in times like this. "I know, it's scary. But everything is going to be okay, alright? I won't let him come near us."

Patton laid his head on Logan's shoulder, keeping silent. He wasn't sure what to say. He was scared of talking, even. What if he opened his mouth and the voice that came out was Remy's?

Logan held his husband close, laying his head on top of Patton's. A mutual agreement seemed to pass between the two. An agreement that for however long, they were just going to stay there, close to each other, being there for each other.

Even though, let's be honest... neither knew enough about the other person to truly "be there for them" during the current situation.

Patton's thoughts swirled in his brain, and he just tried to not listen. He had murdered three people. Remy murdered five. They were both murderers, or didn't matter what their intentions were. They had taken human lives. If Patton kept up with the killing, he'd just become even more like Remy. Who's to say their weren't already identical, though?

God, he wished he could just slip into a world where everything went his way. Where everything had gone his way, since the dawn of time.

...

He totally could, though.

•~~~~•

Patton opened his eyes to sunlight streaming in through his bedroom window. He yawned and blinked groggily at the light, before quickly turning over in bed, grabbing his phone off his nightstand, and checking the time.

6:30 AM

Ten minutes until his alarm went off... he might as well get up now.

Patton went ahead and turned his alarm off ahead of schedule, and hoisted himself out of bed. It was Wednesday... which meant he had school. At least he got to see his friends!

As he slowly finished getting ready for the day, he eventually found his way to his phone and grabbed it. But before he could slip it into his pocket, he stared at it for a brief moment.

...Did he even bother trying?

One of Patton's best friends, Joe, had been missing from school since Monday. He hadn't responded to any of Patton's texts since Friday, either, and it was really worrying Patton. He tried to tell himself Joe was just sick, but who is ever sick and away from their phone?

Patton had texted him a few times a day, every day, since Friday. No responses. He really didn't want to bother Joe, though. Was he? Maybe.

But he just had to know if he was okay.

Patton sighed and quickly sat down on his bed, opening Joe's contact in Messages.

Joe :))
7:02 AM

Hey, Joe. I'm REALLY sorry
I'm texting you so much.
I just wanna quickly check in,
see if you're at your phone.
I hope I see you soon!!>

Oh my gosh, hey!
Ahhh I'm so sorry I
haven't replied to
<you for so long!! :((

AHHHHHH OMGGGG 
it's totally fine I'm just so
glad you're okay!!!  Are you??
What even happened????>

Oh my gosh. I got a
terrible stomach thing.
Bad sushi, or something.
Even though sushi is never bad......
anyway, my mom ended up
taking care of me since she's
a nurse and stuff.
Wouldn't let me near my phone.
At all. She finally gave it to me
today, though! I'm still not
gonna be in school until like
tomorrow or something, but at
<least I got communication now, right??

I'm just glad you're okay. :))
You worried me so much!! Can't wait
to see you tomorrow, then!!>

Can't wait to see you!!!
Now go to school, I know
you're just procrastinating
leaving lol. Bye!!! And tell
< everyone I said hi!!

I will!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Bye!!!>
read 7:09 AM

Patton practically squealed to himself, quickly pocketing his phone. He jumped up and down in his room for a couple seconds until he reminded himself that he needed to go to school.

He grinned the whole time that he was driving, and when he finally got to school, he entered the building with a spring in his step. Up ahead he saw his best friend Logan and quickly ran up to say hi.

"Logan!" Patton greeted excitedly, jumping up and down as he stood in front of his best friend. Logan chuckled, putting his hands tentatively on Patton's shoulders to calm him down.

"You're quite excited this morning," Logan commented, smiling gently.

"Yeah! Joe finally texted me! He's coming back to school tomorrow!"

Logan's smile widened. "That is amazing. I'm happy you're excited for that."

"I know, right? He's been away from his phone since Friday! Probably ate something weird at that party you drove him to."

Logan nodded. "Perhaps. Now come on, the bell is going to ring soon. Get ready for class."

Patton quickly nodded, and let out a giggle. "Alright! See you at lunch, Lo!"

Logan smiled, even wider. "I'll see you, Pat."

Patton ran off to his locker, and soon, to his next class. And the next. And the next. Soon enough, Patton exited his final class before lunch. He stood near the wall next to his classroom door as he exited, waiting for the large mass of students to disperse before he started walking.

Suddenly, he saw that someone was walking up to him. Wearing... sunglasses, a white t-shirt and a black leather jacket?

...

Nope, Patton was mistaken. It was just Logan. No one in Patton's school had, or probably ever would be, dressed like that.

Patton smiled at his best friend. "Hey, Lo! Wanna walk to lunch together?"

"Actually, I needed to talk to you. That's why I was just looking for you now."

Patton raised his eyebrows. "Oh, okay! Uh... is it bad?"

Logan chuckled. "No, I don't believe so."

Logan idled for a moment before he extended his hand, saying, "let's go on a walk, maybe?"

Patton quickly took it, smiling. "Sure!"

Honestly, Patton didn't even care what Logan had to say at this point. He got to hold his hand, and if that wasn't the biggest privilege in the universe, then he didn't know what was.

Comfortable silence filled the space between them as Logan lead Patton outside. It wasn't unusual for students to leave campus during lunch, so no bystanders really batted an eye. They started walking down the sidewalk, and Logan checked his watch.

"Alright... we have half an hour, so we'll have to turn around soon. I'm sure Roman and Virgil will be wondering where we are eventually, too." Logan commented. Patton quickly nodded.

"So, uh... what did you wanna talk about, then?" Patton asked. Logan sighed.

"Right, right. Well... let me start off by saying that, uhm... we have been friends for around two or three years now, since you came to this school in Sophomore year. And during that time I've really enjoyed talking to you, hanging out with you, just being your friend in general, really. All the sleepovers we've had, all the restaurants we've gone to together... it's all just bee frankly amazing. So I wanted to tell you what I am going to tell you in the most professional, sophisticated way possible, which is why I decided to take you on a walk."

Patton nodded, though a thought seemed to slip from his lips.

"You know I'm really not a 'sophisticated' person, though, right?"

Logan laughed gently. "I know that. This is just more... my style, I guess."

Logan sighed. He gently squeezed Patton's hand, and Patton squeezed back, realizing that Logan was getting nervous. Logan glanced down at Patton, and Patton sent a reassuring smile back up.

"...Alright. I wanted to tell you today that I have had a very large, and I mean very large, astronomical? Astronomical. An astronomical-sized crush on you for... oh my gosh, I'm not even sure how long. Since we met, possibly." Logan laughed a breathy, awkward laugh, keeping his gaze away from Patton. "Since this has been going on for so long, and I've seen some people recently start to act... interested, in you, I just wanted to tell you while I still have the chance. I-"

Patton's hand let go of Logan's, and Patton stopped. But before Logan even had time to worry, Patton had wrapped his arms tightly around Logan's torso. Logan was completely stiff, unsure of how to react as Patton buried his head in Logan's chest.

Logan's hands eventually moved to sit slightly awkwardly on Patton's back.

"...Is it safe to assume you-"

"YES! I like you, too!" Patton cut Logan off, a grin plastered on his face.

Logan almost instantly returned the smile, his arms moving to fully wrap around Patton in a hug and pulling him close. They giggled together, their feet stumbling backwards and forwards from the force of each other and both of their faces extremely red by now. Both had honestly been waiting for this moment since the second they had met.

When they eventually pulled away from the hug after what seemed like centuries, their hands slid almost naturally together, and they both let out a slightly-awkward, slightly-excited giggle.

"Oh my gosh! This is awesome! Uh, we gotta do something! We gotta do something, right? Do you wanna hang out this weekend? Maybe have another sleepover, like we did Saturday?"

Logan quickly nodded, smiling. "Yes, that sounds amazing."

Both were silent for another moment, until Logan looked at his watch. He raised an eyebrow.

"We should get back to school. I'm sure Virgil and Roman would love to hear about this. We still have lunch to eat, anyway."

"Yeah, definitely. And, uh... Logan?"

Logan raised his eyebrows, blinking. "Yes, Patton?"

Patton was silent for a moment until he quickly leaned up and pressed his lips to Logan's cheek. Logan blushed, but smiled, and quickly pressed his own lips to Patton's forehead. Both giggled.

"Alright... let's go back to school now."

Patton nodded.

•~~~~•

"...Hey, Love? Are you alright?"

Patton blinked as his vision slowly focused on his surroundings. TV, carpet, couch, Logan... real life. He turned his head to look at his husband.

"Hmm? What?"

"You were staring at the coffee table and mumbling something underneath your breath that I couldn't hear. You were smiling, too."

Patton blinked. "Oh... sorry. I think I spaced out."

"It's fine."

Both men were silent for a brief moment until Logan sighed.

"But I just-"

Before Logan could finish his sentence, there was suddenly a knock at their door. Logan sighed, peeling his arms away from Patton and standing up, muttering an "I'll get it" underneath his breath.

Patton laid back against the couch.

...What even was that? A fantasy-land where Joe never... died. Or anyone else, it seemed like. And...

Patton had a flashback to something that had happened in his daydream. He now recognized that the specific Wednesday Patton was daydreaming about was the same Wednesday that he had met Remy. The same Wednesday that Remy had pinned him against a wall just to talk to him, and Logan had come to his rescue with some excuse about promising to walk to lunch together. But in that daydream... Remy didn't exist.

Huh. A world without Remy...

Patton's hearing suddenly focused in on Logan's conversation with whoever was at the door when he heard that familiar name.

"...Remy did likely do it, I will tell you that, sir. I'm not sure who else would."

"And you said that you were friends with Christopher and Bill before they died?"

"Yes. But we had only been friends for about less than a week."

"Ah, alright. Do you know how, in any way, Remy could be connected to them?"

"No. But I will mention that he could have killed them to... try and get closer to myself."

"Oh?"

"I'm Logan Croft. Or... he would only call me by my last name when we were in high school. My husband dated him before he got arrested."

"Oh my goodness! You would be a very important part to the investigation. I'll need to learn more before I report any findings, though. Maybe you and your husband could talk with me sometime?"

"I would certainly be up for that, though my husband hasn't... really been handling this well, so I'm not sure if he'd want to."

"Perfectly understandable. Alright, I'll give you my number, thank you so much for being willing to help."

"Of course."

A few moments later, and the door shut. Logan walked back over to the couch and sat down.

"Who was that?" Patton immediately asked.

"A detective. Trying to get information about... the current situation we're in. We're probably going to meet up soon to talk about it more. Would you be willing to join us, though? It's perfectly fine if you don't want to.

Patton blinked, and once again, thoughts were filling his head.

Why had the detective acted so surprised when he found out that Logan was, well... Logan? Why was he so friendly? What if he was looking for Logan, to help someone? To help Remy? Was Patton just questioning things too much?

"...I'll think about it, maybe."

What if he was trying to get information on Logan to...

"Just remember, you don't have to."

"Yeah. I know. I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick."

"Alright."

Patton stood up and scurried to their bathroom. He closed the door and stared at himself.

He couldn't stare at himself. He was disgusting. For all the things he's done and is thinking of doing. He looked away, instead facing the wall.

He shut his eyes tightly, trying to focus on anything, anything at all, except the thoughts that were running through his mind.

Patton didn't want to have to kill another person. It was the worst experience of his life, having to kill two.

Or was it? Or was loosing five of his friends in high school worse? He wasn't sure. But you know what would be worse than all of that?

Loosing Logan.

Logan.

Logan was the reason for all of this. Logan had to be protected. And... Patton still didn't want to kill another person.

So what, maybe he was possibly wrong about Christopher, Bill, and Matt working for Remy. Or maybe he wasn't. How could he possibly know? He couldn't. He had to play it safe, right? Trust your gut.

But murder was wrong.

Patton forced himself to look back to the mirror. He frowned, and his lip started to tremble.

Murder was wrong. Remy was wrong. He was wrong. Someone had to be wrong. Something had to be wrong.

...Why couldn't he just live a normal life?

Though Patton still tried to fight the thoughts that were flowing through his mind, he realized that he knew what was going to happen.

It didn't matter what Patton thought. It didn't matter how hard Patton tried to get himself to stop. He was going to end up murdering that detective, and that was that. That was the truth. End of story. No matter how badly Patton didn't want it that way, deep down, he knew that's how it was gonna be.

...

Patton didn't want to kill. He hated the thought of having to take another innocent life...

...but these lives weren't innocent. They were working for Remy, weren't they?

And even though Patton stood there now, crying in the bathroom as he tried to figure out how he was going to kill another person... he, for once, didn't stop his incoming thoughts. This is how it was. This is how it was going to be. He had to accept that. And he'd do anything to protect Logan.

Anything.

•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Patton in the bathroom
Patton in the bathroom wanting to murder
...
Forget how long it's been
He's just Patton in the bathroom
Patton in the bathroom wanting to murder
...
No, you cAn'T CoME iN-

See ya in the next chapter!👍🏻