As the days passed, Patton heard more and more about these mysterious strangers that Logan had met on his walks. It had really only been two days since Patton had called Janus, though. It just seemed like he heard of them so often these days.

He mostly stayed silent whenever Logan mentioned them in conversation- he didn't want to say anything weird that would alert or confuse his husband. The only thing he knew about them were their names- Christopher and Bill- after he had asked one day.

That was all he knew. He didn't want to know more. But he had to. How else was he supposed to plan out a murder?

...Yes, a murder.

Patton had decided. He wanted his husband to survive this weird situation they were in, with Remy being out on the loose. He wanted to adopt and raise that kid with him. He wanted to watch that kid get married. He wanted to grow old with Logan, and be with him until their final days, which hopefully wouldn't come until at least six or seven decades from the present.

Hopefully. That hopefully could become a definitely, if Patton did this. He just had to do this one little thing. This one little thing, and their lives would instantly return back to normal. Just like that. It would be fine. It would be fine.

Though, truthfully, Patton wasn't sure exactly how he was going to do this. He had never murdered anyone before. Or... not in the way he was planning. He couldn't just use medicine again, it's not like they were coming over for dinner. It's not like Patton would ever let those two disgusting men inside his house, anyway.

How do you even murder someone..? Patton couldn't just ask anyone for help. That would be a stupid question to ask. He didn't know any murderers, anyway.

Patton couldn't ask someone... but he could ask something.

At the moment, he was hanging out in his bedroom, alone. Again. Why had he let Logan go on another walk, alone? He wasn't sure. Maybe he just liked the alone time, where he could hang out with his mind and his mind only. Yes, his brain was scary, but it really helped him out a lot sometimes.

He was alone. All he needed to do was some googling. Just go on incognito mode, right? Yeah, just do that, and he'd be fine. He wasn't sure when his husband was going to return home though, so he'd have to search fast.

Patton grabbed his phone and leaned back in bed, starting to google.

Fastest way to kill someone

Easiest way to kill someone

How easy can knives break skin

Can you die from a stab wound

Can you kill someone with a kitchen knives

Sharpest knives

How sharp are kitchen knives

Can you stab someone with a kitchen knife

...Patton felt disgusting.

Especially since he clicked on the "images" tab for his last search and ended up seeing an actual picture of someone with a knife stuck in their head.

Which... lead to Patton looking through a bunch of pictures of dead people that were stabbed, yet look strangely unrealistic. He wasn't sure why he was doing that. He was just trying to research for something he was doing and ended up stumbling upon a very strange corner of the internet. It was one of those things that was so horrible, you couldn't look away.

It still freaked him out, though, that was for sure. At least he had a good idea about what he was gonna do soon would turn out to look like, right?

As Patton kept searching, he eventually decided that he was going to use a kitchen knife to do what he had to do. They had a lot of knives in their house, one being gone couldn't hurt, right? He'd probably hide the knife after he used and cleaned it, just in case, though. Not just in case he had to murder another person- that wouldn't happen. That would never happen. It would be just in case the knife somehow still had DNA samples of the two guys he was about to kill.

Patton sighed and closed his incognito tab on his phone, throwing it to the other side of bed. Now he was just bored. A bit scared, but mostly bored. When was Logan coming home?

Right, Logan. It's all for Logan. Patton should text him, make sure he's okay.

Patton quickly grabbed his phone again and opened up his husband's contact, labeled as 💙Soulmate💙. He shot him a quick text, anxiously staring at his phone as it sent.

And suddenly, he heard a ding from nearby in his room. Patton tensed, looking up to his nightstand, where the sound was coming from.

A phone. Logan's phone. Logan's phone, dinging with Patton's text.

Patton dropped his phone and immediately grabbed his husband's, starting to panic. He forgot his phone. Oh god, he forgot his phone. What if he was never to be seen again? No, forgetting his phone once couldn't mean he was dead. Right? Right.

This was Christopher and Bill's doing, surely. They convinced him somehow to leave his phone at home. Soon enough, if Patton didn't act soon, they'd kidnap him and bring him to Remy. Or they'd just kill him on the spot. Patton had to stop this before they did that.

But how? He needed to figure out their address. Even if Patton were to accompany Logan on one of his walks it wouldn't get him far, he can't kill the two guys right in front of his husband. So he needed to find their addresses.

...

Logan... always got the address of any new person he meets when he gets their contact information. Logan has both of their numbers. Could this mean he has their address saved in his phone, too?

Patton stared at the phone that was in his hands. He... no. He couldn't look through it, that was wrong. Murder was one thing, but invading someone's privacy is worse. Even if that person is your husband.

But what if it was for the betterment of his future? His future as a living, breathing human person? It was only an address, and that was all Patton was going to look for. Nothing else.

He sighed, and quickly turned on the phone. He knew Logan's passcode by heart- 314159. Patton quietly giggled as he saw Logan's home screen background being a picture of the two of them, laying together in their favorite field. He quickly found the contacts app and searched up the name Christopher. One result came up. Perfect.

Patton grabbed his own phone and opened a notes folder, quickly copying down the address that was listed in the phone. He then searched the name Bill to find that Bill lived at the same place.

Huh... interesting. They must be roommates. Probably easier for Remy to communicate with them if they live in the same house.

Patton closed Logan's phone and his own, just in time for him to hear the door open downstairs.

"Patton, I'm home!" Logan called.

"I'm coming down!" Patton yelled back, springing out of bed and sprinting downstairs. Logan closed the front door and both quickly embraced, Patton grinning as he pressed his ear to Logan's heart. It was beating. He was alive.

"How was your walk?" Patton asked.

"It was nice. I talked to Christopher and Bill again."

"Oh! Cool. Hey, did you know you left your phone here?"

Both stepped back from the hug, and Logan raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really? Did you try and text me? I'm so sorry, Pat, I didn't mean to."

Patton smiled gently. "It's okay. Hey, I'm gonna run to the store before we have dinner, okay?"

Logan blinked a few times. Patton gulped. He was pretty sure they didn't need any groceries- he just needed an excuse to go murder some people. Before, he hadn't really been planning on doing it tonight, but now that he knew their address and knew exactly what they were doing to Logan's brain, he just had to.

"Oh. Are we running out of something?"

"Well, uh... I think we're pretty low on Crofter's."

"Pat... we have two jars left." Logan chuckled.

Patton giggled, stepping forward and poking his husband's cheeks. "Well, you blow through that jam so fast, two jars might as well be nothing."

Logan smiled, placing his hands on Patton's waist. "You do have a point. Alright, I'll stay here, be safe."

"I will! Lemme run upstairs and grab my phone."

Patton quickly bran to his bedroom and grabbed his phone, and then ran back downstairs. Now he just needed an excuse to go get a kitchen knife...

"I'll see you soon, Pat. I love you," Logan called out. Patton looked around and realized Logan was entering the bathroom. Patton smiled.

"Love you, too!"

Perfect.

He rushed into the kitchen and grabbed a random, large knife before sneaking out of the kitchen and quickly making it outside to his and Logan's shared car. He threw the knife underneath his seat and turned on his phone.

...Right. He was sharing his location with Logan, wasn't he? Would Logan look at his location while he was at Christopher and Bill's house? Now that he thought of it, their house was along a busy road, so maybe Logan would just think he was stuck in traffic. Yeah, sure.

Well... no matter what, first stop was the store. Patton promised Crofter's, and Logan was going to get some.

Time passed quickly. Patton made it to the store and quickly bought a bunch more jars of the jam, bagging them and putting them in his backseat. He got back into his car and pulled up Christopher and Bill's address, and he was on the road, again. He thought over what he was going to do in the car.

He had to hide fingerprints, didn't he? What could he use? Well, he wasn't leaving the knife there. So maybe he just had to be careful. Oh, wait! There were gardening gloves in the trunk. Hah. Don't you just love it when things work out perfectly?

Patton slowly drove down the road the house he was looking for sat on. When he found it he parked across the street as to not draw too much suspicion. He grabbed the knife, and slipped the gloves from the trunk of his car onto his hands.

Okay... just go in, stab them, and come back out. Simple, right? Don't freeze up, just do. Don't freeze up.

What if he did freeze up? What if he got caught and Logan stopped loving him? No. Logan made a promise. But what if he broke it? Would Logan ever break a promise? Logan had promised he'd never leave Patton. He hadn't broken it yet, right?

If Patton didn't do this, he'd loose his husband anyway. But if he does do it then he'll definitely get to keep him. He just had to stay quiet. Get them while they were least expecting it.

Patton checked his watch- it was eight at night. No way would they be sleeping. Maybe they'd be getting ready for bed, though? No. He just had to hope they were both in the same room somewhere.

Patton sighed. Alright, come on, start walking towards the house.

He took his first steps across the street and made it up to the house, hiding the knife behind his back. He examined the house, making sure there were no cameras. Upon seeing that there were none, he slipped into the backyard sat beneath a window.

Oh god, he was actually going to do this. Okay. Deep breaths. How does he get in? Does he do it slowly and surprise them? Or should he just waltz in like it was any other ordinary day? He should probably surprise them so they have less time to run. But how would he do that?

He snuck over to the backdoor and learned through the window in it, careful now to touch anything. He saw a small room with two doors inside, both were closed. One probably lead to the living room, and the other to... a bathroom, or something. Patton noticed a small bookshelf that was just about far enough away from the wall that he might be able to fit behind it. He just had to sneak in, wait for the two residents of the house to decide that there was not a murderer in their house after they heard the door open, and then Patton could get to the rest of the house and... do the thing.

Okay. He just had to do it. Don't think, do. Don't think, do. Don't think. Don't think. Don't think. Three... two...

Patton grabbed the doorknob and twisted, cringing silently at how loud the door was. He slipped inside and stumbled behind the bookshelf. He took a silent, shakey deep breath before biting his lip to try and stay quiet.

A door opened.

"Hello? Any psycho-murderers hiding in here?" Patton heard a voice call. Another voice laughed from another room. Patton clenched his teeth and balled his fists out of nervousness, his eyes wide open.

"Pretty sure it was just the wind, Chris." The farther-away voice, probably Bill, said.

"It's not even windy, though..!" Christopher mumbled. The door closed. Patton heard footsteps fading away, and he realized he was alone in the room again.

Oh god. Here he was, in some guys' house, about to kill them. He could totally just leave, though, that's the thing. He could. He should. He shouldn't?

Patton blinked a few times, trying to control his breathing as a single tear rolled down his cheek. No- he had to stop thinking. He could freak out after, not during.

Who ever knew murder could be so... stressful?

Patton gripped the knife and slowly inched our from behind the bookshelf, double-checking he was alone in the small room. He quickly deduced which door was to the living room, and stood in front of it.

Okay... turn the knob. It's fine. Turn the knob. Just make a run for it. Just open the door and spring forward.

...

He opened the door, only slightly, enjoying the fact that the door was practically silent. He peered into the living room and looked around until his eyes landed on a small kitchen in the corner of the room, where Christopher and Bill were standing.

Okay. He could slip through, hide behind the couch or something. Easy.

Yeah. Easy. Okay. Three, two, one- wait no, he wasn't ready.

...

Okay.

Three... two... one..-

Patton opened the door all the way and sprinted over to the side of the couch, hiding behind it. The two that had been talking in the kitchen immediately went silent. Whispering followed, that Patton couldn't hear.

One exited the kitchen. Patton started to hear their conversation, and recognized the one to have left the kitchen as Christopher. Bill quickly followed him.

"Dude, you're acting like one of those stupid guys in a horror movie! The one that gets killed first!" Bill whisper-yelled.

"Shut up, Bill!" Christopher responded. He glanced around the living room.

"Maybe it's just a raccoon," Christopher commented.

"Why the hell would there be a raccoon in our house? How could a raccoon open two doors?"

"I don't know. Do they have thumbs?"

"I- ...I don't know. But that doesn't matter!"

Christopher still walked a bit forward, until he was very close to Patton. Patton gulped silently.

No turning back now. Oh my- no turning back. No, he could just run away, right? Yeah. But he wasn't going to do that, no. He had to do this. For Logan, right? For Logan.

Christopher stepped right next to Patton, not bothering to look down at the ground. Patton saw his opportunity.

...For Logan.

Patton stabbed Christopher in the ankle- which was surprisingly hard and took a lot of force- and Christopher immediately yelped, stumbling to the ground. Patton stood and heaved the knife out of his ankle, and both of the men froze while staring at him.

They can freeze, but you can't.

Patton gulped and struggled to keep his eyes open, but he kept going. He kneeled and stabbed Christopher in his heart before standing up and staring at Bill. Bill made eye contact with him. He was completely frozen, not sure whether to look at Christopher, or at Patton. Patton wasn't sure where to look either.

Stop thinking.

Tears fell down Patton's cheeks and he didn't bother to wipe them as he stepped forward, stabbing Bill in the heart, too. Bill fell down, and Patton looked back to Christopher through his now blurry vision. Christopher looked dead. And after looking at Bill too, it looked like they were both dead. And if they weren't dead yet, they were unconscious, and would be dead soon enough. There was blood pooling from their stab wounds, pouring out into the carpet.

Patton's grip loosened on the knife and he struggled not to drop it. He used his free hand to try and wipe his face, which now had tears steaming down it, but it didn't help. He let out a sob, covering his mouth with his hand.

Oh god... he just murdered two people. Two. This was different from Matt. It was more than one person, and he never saw Matt die. But he just saw those two die. Those two lives, just gone.

What had they done in life? What more did they want to do? Were they happy?

Did they deserve to die?

Patton let out another choked sob, trying desperately not to drop the knife he was holding. He suddenly looked down at his clothes and realized there were blood splatters on his shirt. He whimpered through his tears, but he didn't move. Now he was frozen in place, himself.

Minutes passed of Patton just staring at the two dead bodies in front of him, a knife in his grip and tears dampening his face. He couldn't think. He couldn't do. He had just done something that he couldn't undo. There was no "reset" button he could hit. He had done this.

...

Never again.

Patton took a shakey breath, wiping his face again. He should clean up- do something. He could cry in his car. But he had to get home to Logan soon. He had to make it quick.

Patton went over in his mind what he had touched, and realized that he had been wearing gloves the entire time, so he should be good.

He couldn't change his clothing. But he had blood stains all over his shirt. So red, it almost looked like Crofter's.

...Crofter's. That's it. He could open one of the jars and spread some of the jam on his shirt, too. Make it look like he got hungry during the ride and accidentally spilled some jam on himself when he was eating. Yeah. Yeah! Okay.

Patton took one more look around the house. The image of the two dead men burned into his brain. He let out another quiet sob, but quickly composed himself, and started leaving.

He snuck to his car and threw his gloves and knife into one of the bags of Crofter's. He'd just have to make sure he was the one who brought that bag in the house. He then grabbed a jam jar and struggled for a good three minutes to open it. When he did, he used his finger to spread a bunch on his shirt and arms. His shirt was... definitely ruined. He probably deserved it, though.

Trying not to think about the fact he had just murdered two people, Patton put the jam back and grabbed his phone. He decided to text Logan about his Crofter's mishap so it wouldn't surprise Logan when he saw him come home. Now he just had to feign his normal attitude, text-wise, and ignore the tears that were now starting to pool in his eyes again.

💙Soulmate💙

Hey Logan>

<Are you alright, Patton?

Uhhhh,,,,, soooo.....>

<Are you safe?

Oh yeah I'm all good>

<Then what happened?

Please don't be mad>

<Just tell me, please.

So I got kinda hungry when
I was driving and I was
like really hungry so I pulled
over and started eating some
of the Crofter's I got but then
I spilled a bunch on my shirt,
like a lot, the shirt might be ruined
and I'm really sorry I waisted your jam>

<Wow. That is...
an interesting occurrence.

I'm sorry :(((>

<It's alright, don't worry.
Come on home, we can try
and wash the shirt. Did you
get any on your arms or
fingers? The jam can be sticky.

A little bit, yeah>

<Alright just be careful.
I'll have a washcloth waiting
for you, and I'll grab you
a change of clothes, too.

.......onesies??>

<Fine.

Yay!! Thank you! I'll be
home soon, love ya! 💙>

<I love you, too. 💙💙

💙💙💙>

<💙💙💙💙

💙💙💙💙💙>

<💙💙💙💙💙💙

💙💙💙💙💙💙💙>

<Alright we're not fighting
about how much we love
each other right now.

hehehehehe>

Patton sniffled and smiled sadly, turning off his phone. He took a deep breath and started driving home. He was still tearing up at what he had just done, but he tried not to think about that.

When he got home he made sure to run to the backseat and grab the grocery bag with the gloves and knife in them. Logan came outside and grimaced, seeing his husband's shirt. Patton chuckled awkwardly.

"Wow, you really made a mess. Come here," Logan said, walking over to his husband. Patton dropped his grocery bag as Logan grabbed Patton's arms, rubbing them with a warm washcloth. Logan looked up to his face and raised an eyebrow, using a hand to hold Patton's chin.

"Huh. You didn't get any in your face."

Patton grinned, nodding.

"Well... at least there's that." Logan said, smiling gently. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to his husband's forehead before pulling away and reaching down to the bag Patton had dropped. Patton raised his eyebrows and quickly grabbed it before Logan could.

"Oh, honey, let me get that for you," Logan said.

"Nonono! I can- I can get this one. Least I can do."

Logan chuckled. "Alright, alright. Your onesie is on the couch. Put the bag on the counter and wash your hands, and then get changed."

"Okay!"

Logan walked to the car and started getting more bags out. Patton sprinted inside, putting the bag on the counter and quickly grabbing the knife and gloves from in the bag. He sighed in relief when he saw that no blood had gotten on to the bag. He grabbed his onesie and sprinted to the bathroom.

He washed his hands a good two or three times, making sure to clean his arms off a bit, too. He took off his shirt and threw it onto the ground, staring at the bloody knife and gloves he had in his possession.

Okay... he had to put them in the bathroom. He couldn't leave the bathroom until they were hidden.

Patton thought for a moment until he just decided to hide them behind the sink. Somewhere Logan never looked. He shoved them both back there, and finished getting changed. After double-checking everything was good and in order, he left the bathroom and walked to the kitchen.

Logan was standing there, still in his normal outfit. He smiled at his husband.

"You sure bought a lot of Crofter's," he commented. Patton giggled, nodding.

"I'm gonna go change into my own onesie," Logan continued. "I already put half of the jam away, could you get the rest? Thank you."

Patton nodded. Logan kisses his cheek as he walked out of the kitchen. Patton was silent as he put the jam away, and though his thoughts were screaming at him again, he tried not to listen.

Yes, he had just murdered someone, but Logan didn't have to know that.

When Logan came back downstairs in a unicorn onesie, Patton smiled brightly, closing a kitchen cabinet as he put the last jar away.

Logan walked up to his husband and put his hands on his waist, leaning in and kissing him. Patton put his hands on Logan's chest, kissing back immediately. When they pulled away, they smiled.

"So... what are we gonna have for dinner, then?" Patton asked, starting to play with the fabric of Logan's onesie.

"I say we just eat some Crofter's and watch a movie."

"I mean... yeah."

Some minutes passed, and both were on the couch, their own jar of Crofter's in their hands and the TV playing softly in the background as they began to eat.

Logan took a few bites from his jam, practically swooning over the familiar taste, before looking to Patton, who was struggling to get the jar open. It was then that Logan got an idea.

"Hey, let me help you with that," Logan offered. Patton handed the jar over, but Logan just put it on the coffee table and scooted closer to his husband. Patton gave him a confused look.

Both turned their entire bodies to face each other, and Logan outstretched his arms.

"What?" Patton asked.

"Come here."

"Huh?"

"Just come here."

Patton smiled slightly, still confused, and scooted closer to Logan. Logan pulled him into his lap. Patton blushed, smiling and wrapping his arms around Logan's shoulders.

"I thought we were eating dinner?"

"We are. Give me your spoon."

Once Logan had obtained Patton's spoon he grabbed his own jar of Crofter's and put some jam onto the spoon. He brought the spoon to Patton's mouth. The latter blushed, but kept his mouth shut even though he knew what Logan wanted to do.

"What are you doing...?" Patton asked.

"I'm trying to feed you myself, because clearly you can't be trusted to feed yourself without making a gigantic mess."

Patton feigned being offended, but still let out a giggle after he scoffed. Logan smirked too, poking the spoon on his husband's lips.

"Come on, just let me."

"Fine, fine."

The next hour was waisted away with two lovers holding each other close, their dinner consisting of many spoonfuls of jam. They were mostly silent as they gazed into each other's eyes, the only sound being a giggle that escaped from both of their lips whenever Logan would fake going to give Patton a spoonful but instead taking it for himself. They ended up sharing the entire jar together. Once Logan had fed Patton the last spoonful, Patton buried his head in Logan's shoulder after the two had shared a considerably long kiss.

Life was perfect... for once.

But Patton couldn't forget what he had just done. This was all a lie. He never even spilled Crofter's on himself. Did he really have to think about that right now, though? Maybe not. Though, there was one question that seemed to linger in his brain, as Logan held him close, rocking him back and forth gently, kissing his hair every once and a while

...Did Patton even deserve a perfect life?

•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Holy shït this chapter was long

Why? I don't know, murder takes time, ya know? Right? Right.

Also totally wasn't speaking from experience during that one part where Patton was researching various sentences and stumbled upon a certain array of very bloody stabby stabby pictures-

See ya in the next chapter!🔍