26.01.20 - 8:17 PM

i need to see you.

talk to you.

i don't care if it's just for a few minutes, or a whole night.

i just really need to see you.

i know that it's best for me to give up and forget...

but i can't.

and if i try and forget, i don't think it will help... it will worsen my pain. i tried to tame my needs, my urges, and my love; for so long.

but i can't stand to hide it.

but i have to.

it's always, "i can't, but i have to".

how does that even help?

it doesn't.

i am lost as to what i should do.

should i listen to you to?

your silence?

your license to stay away?

i know for a fact that i should stop second guessing myself... but then i second guess, seconding guessing... and so on.

i'm indecisive.

i hate that i'm like this... complicating everything.

i'm so sorry, for complicating something that was over two years ago.

i'm so sorry.

yours truly,

your sweetheart.