Sometimes, you feel like the world will crash down on you, but really, you're just a speck. And nothing more. Nothing revolves around you, just the feelings you hold, and they are dangerous to be alone with. So learn to kill your emotions, or have the power to face them. But no matter what, you'll always be small, in the little world, that is your mind.

1962-

Connor Jet Murphy, the eldest son of Lilith, and Larry Murphy, and older sibling to his 2 sisters and 5 brothers. Lilith was not his original Mother, but after Cynthia passed away while having his sister Zoe, his father remarried. A star student in his small Mormon school, and a artistic prodigy. He was never one to disappoint his parents, but there's a first time for everything.

Connor had been on his Mother and Father's heels about this since he was eighteen years of age. He had dreamed of joining the army since he saw a poster of the famous Uncle Sam hanging outside the small neighborhood's only grocery store. It was just after church had ended, his mother and sisters ran into the store to pick up a few things for dinner.

Connor never liked waiting outside, being forced to hold his younger brother Pete's sweaty little hand. The child tugging and whining at him but that day was different, all cliches aside. His attention was drawn to the large red, white and blue poster plastered along the brick wall of the building. It read, "I want YOU for the U.S. army." It's not like he hadn't seen it before, the subject of the war was everywhere these days, on your t.v., in your stores, even in school. 'Russia declares war on U.S. winter, January 1st, 1968 U.S. drops bombs on Eastern Russia, autumn, September 12th, 1968.

Time in between declaration and bombing known as the brewing period, temperatures run high on both sides— he has heard it all plenty of times. But it was something about today, the way the southern sunshine beat down on him, the thick air, and his brother's hand, that it finally hit him. This life he had, it wasn't what he wanted, in fact, this was the opposite of what he wanted. But this poster, this poster he saw wrinkled at the sides, on this hot summer day, spoke levels to him, the life the poster promised was his escape.

~~~
World war three broke out in the late sixties, the cold war finally being tipped by America bombing western Russia. The war continues with Britain, France, and most of South America siding with the U.S. The U.S.S.R. ( Russia ) pushes against and retaliate with bombing Alaska and invading Hawaii. Now it is the early seventies and all young American boys are at the edge of their seat joining the army left and right, hearing stories from their fathers about WWII.
But not all of them join for the honor of being a solider.
~~~

1968-

That was years ago, but the dream was still seeped into his bones.
So he went, and the walk home from the recruiting station was probably the most terrifying moment in his life. It's not like he hasn't been nagging his parents about it for about three years now but, he's actually done it, and there is no going back.

His parents have stopped taking him seriously two years ago, he was an elder now in the church, there was no way he'd defy the mormon religion in such a way. Connor felt his hands quiver, but simply combed the hand through his already growing hair. His step-mother practically begged him to cut it down, saying it made him look like a hippie. Purely out of spite for the women did he grow out his hair even longer.

And after thinking throughout his ideals. Maybe he is joining the army despite his parents wants, as a form of rebellion. Defying everything he knew.

And he had. And that choice, might just be the death of him.

The papers were as heavy as lead in his pocket, but also were his ticket free from here. He didn't want to leave his faith behind, he was a God fearing man. It was the church he had a problem with. Connor had grown up in an area where behind every blade of grass there was a bible, a cross, an old man ready to read you scripture, and that wasn't for him. That was a life he wasn't willing to live.

He thought Christ was as groovy as the next guy or at-least he'd been taught that but he didn't want to choke his teachings down every persons throat before he'd even said 'hello'. The problem was, he couldn't escape, he couldn't think of a solid excuse to tell his father that he didn't want this, without being slapped with the label of sinner. So he joined the army, it was honorable enough, what his parents do couldn't possibly be that bad...

---

When Connor walked back from his early morning exhibition to the recruiting station. It had slipped his mind that his family would be heading out to church. When stepping into the house, his younger sisters, Lilly, and Zoe where already in their Sunday's best. But the people who looked at him funny, where his little brothers, Daniel, Joey, and Steven; all raising a eyebrow in confusion at Connor's casual attire, while Pete tried to take off his tie, out of frustration for the clothing item being to tight around his small neck.

And he didn't even know where Kenny would be. He passed his younger siblings, into the kitchen with a sinking feeling in his stomach, and a feeling of dread as time went by.

Finally he found his mother, who was in her lovely new white dress, grabbing her keys and hat, before turning around and spotting Him. "Oh! You're home! I had thought you went to the church early." She looked at him from head to toe and cringed, "You are not wearing that to church, go and put on your suit Jet Murphy."

Connor hated when she referred to him as his middle name. One he didn't even want, But was given to him by childhood friends who would make fun of how lengthy he was, making him faster then the others. As fast as a jet. But that left his mind quickly, as He could feel sweat dripping down the side of his neck, while he slowly pulled out the papers in his back pocket, his mother just gave him an even more confused expression, and to make it worse his father chooses to walk I'm at that very moment.

"Honey I-.... Oh hello Jet, where have you been?" His fathers eyes move down to land on what is in his sons hands. "Is everything okay?"

Connor swallowed back the guilt in his throat before speaking. "Mother, father, I've spoken about the military many times with you. And now that I'm 18, as an adult I can make decisions on my own." And with that it was like sirens were set off in his mothers head. "Absolutely NOT!" She yelled, anger in her eyes that, Connor had never seen. His father on the other hand looked shocked, and more then disappointed in him. "Jet... Don't tell me you already did this? War is something we do not condone, you are a elder- you should know this. This behavior, is something we didn't expect from you."

"I've been asking for years! I've explained that this is what I want to do!"
Connor spoke back just as upset, but before his father could reply his mother was yelling again. "We never expected you to actually join! We thought it was some silly teenaged dream you'd grow out of!" If someone could possibly whistle like a steaming hot tea kettle, she would be doing it right now. "Connor" his father spoke up, tone harsh and petrifying like he'd always remember. "we will discuss this after church, go and put on your suit."

Connor stepped back and shook his head. "No, I do not wish to go to church." And with that final statement, his father finally allowed his emotions speak volumes as well. "You will do as I say and go get dress! We are already late!" But instead of obeying like He had done all his life, he stood his ground and answered with a firm, "no"

And it all fell down hill from there. "If you are not going to follow your parents rules you will not live in their house!" His father spat, all the while his mother ran off, probably to avoid her angry husband and to make sure the other children where getting into the car.

Connor took in a deep breath, and grabbed his papers. His body was shaking, almost rattled with fear and adrenaline. He did his best to hide it however. "When you get back from church, I will be gone." He spoke with a glare. His father fixed his tie, and glared back. "I am very disappointed in you" and with that last statement made, his father headed to the car, leaving Connor alone, inside. He wasn't to surprised his father gave up on him quickly. He let out the breath he was holding, sighing in defeat, he didn't think it would have turned out like this, but there is no going back now.
He went up the stairs to his room, after finding one of his parents old suitcases in the storage closet. He packed up all his clothing, which wasn't a lot, all his clothes became hand-me- downs to his younger brothers. He didn't have any other belongings of worth, just some money he had gotten over the years from finding change on the street, to the rare allowances when his father felt bad for getting angry. But even that was only enough for one, maybe two bus tickets. He did know where they kept the emergency money, but stealing money on a Sunday would make what' he has already done even worse. All he had left to pack was a blanket and pillow, and he was set.

He hesitated, while walking out the front door. He had second thoughts, maybe he could put on his suit, head to the church and apologize. Repent for his disobedience. Act as if he was purely living in the lime light of the idea. But he shook that thought out of his head. Grabbing the suitcase, he left his home, his family, his faith, and the only life he had ever known. Walking out of that door was a choice he finally was able to make for himself.

---

On the outskirts of Arizona, he found that there where many things outside of his small town. He had taken a bus to as far away from his home as he could. It ended him up in a town, a lot bigger then his, but not as big as the city. He looked for somewhere to sit for a while. Not knowing where, he found a small coffee shop at the corner of the street. He wasn't allowed to drink coffee, but it wouldn't stop him from going inside the store. "Hello sir!" A man said as he walked in. Connor sat down at a booth. The man was a little taller then him, looked like he was in his early twenties, brown hair and matching eyes, with a five o'clock shadow. Who happened to be walking over to his table "I'm Jeremy, I will be your server this fine morning." Connor looked up and was met with a friendly smile, something he thought he wouldn't see for a while, and only then did he break down into a cry.

---

Jeremy's home was small, meant for only one person. Earlier that day, Connor was amazed with how this compete stranger, chose to sit next to him and talk it out. It was only until Jeremy offered him a place to stay did Connor really see how kind this person was. And Jeremy being a atheist confused him even more. Connor had no where to go, and wanted to say no, to not be a burden, but Jeremy wouldn't take no as a answer. "No 18 year old Mormon boy can survive on the streets, I know it's a better time, it's almost 1970, but it's no place for someone like you."

So now this is where he was, inside of a mans apartment, with his bag on the ground and Jeremy pulling out his couch into a futon. "This is where you'll be sleeping, far out huh?"
Connor still found the man a mystery, but.. he was willing to learn. "Uh.. Yeah, groovy" Connor said with a small smile.

~~~

Waking up the next morning was odd for Connor. He had never spent the night anywhere besides his home. And mornings consisted of at least one small arm draped over his body or a leg kicking his side, Pete or Kenny finding their way into his bed late at night. So waking up alone was new.

During the first morning, Jeremy basically startles him awake while making coffee. Connor shoots upright on the couch, scaring the shit out of Jeremy in return, causing him to almost drops his mug from where he was standing in the kitchen.

"Fuck man, you scared me there!" Clutching his chest he slowly makes his way over. "Are you okay?", he hands Connor the cup and sits beside him.

Connor, still regaining his calm, automatically takes the mug. He takes a deep breath and all things finally come in to focus. Only is it now that the feeling of dread washes over him of the drastic and terrible events that happened. it didn't fully hit him until now? This was it for Hum, he wasn't sure if he was going to laugh from the absurdity of all this or cry about his lost connections but it felt like both.

"Yeah, um, thanks for...this--", he lifts the mug, "Thanks everything actually." He mumbles. Connor thought Jeremy was a good guy, though he seemed to be one to curse. "It's no problem man, so when do you leave for your position?", Jeremy says, taking a gulp of his coffee. "Uh-," Connor leans over and begins rummaging through his bag for his enlistment papers. "Ah! Here they are. It says September 22nd, two weeks." Connor takes a tentative sip of coffee, realizing it's almost getting cold. He almost gags and decides coffee is definitely not for him. Jeremy doesn't seem to notice when Connor sets his barely drunken coffee on the table. "So, do you know if your parents are going to be there when you leave or...", he trails off, not wanting to push the subject.

Connor looks away, not brave enough to meet his eye, he feels like such a coward sometimes. "Probably not.", almost as if he feels the need to protect his parents honor, he continues,"It's not...their thing. They're anti war, they shouldn't have to." Even with that explanation Jeremy seems unmoved.

"It doesn't matter if they don't support what you DO, they should support YOU.", The man sighs, but his brown eyes still held kindness. "It doesn't matter, I'll be there for you. I'll give you the address and we'll exchange letters."

Jeremy pulls him in for a hug, "Is this okay?", he asks breath warm against Connor's shoulder. He thinks to pull away, anything but used to carnal affection, But decides against it. "Yeah.", Connor whispers, feeling tears prick his eyes. He realizes this man has been a greater parent to him in one day than his parents have in eighteen years. "You've made it this far kid" Jeremy whispers back.

~~~
~~~
~~~

1972-

"I spent two weeks with Jeremy, learning about life outside of my small town, and he became my best friend, he became my family. He was the one who hugged me goodbye when I joined the army, he gave me his last name, so I had a registered family member. and I'd send him letters about how hard it was, how scary it was, and he would send letters back, to support me. Even after 4 years in the military, He, is my home. That, that is what I'm thankful for." Connor say to the table of recruits sitting around him. All of them raising up their paper cups and toasting to Jeremy.

"Happy thanks giving Jet" Micheal says patting his back, with his signature smile spread across his face. It was time for Micheal to make the last toast of the night. Standing up, he flashed a bright grin and then spoke up. "I am thankful for everyone here, and for the opportunity to protect out great country! But most of all I'm thankful for this man right here" he said, putting a hand on Connor's shoulder. "And the fact that his birth name is weirder then my nickname!" Everyone laughed but Connor just glared.

Connor knew Michael, (Also known as Boyf, because of his lack of good hand riding, one day wrote his middle name as Boyf instead of Boyd) Micheal, knew about His real name the first month he joined the army. He must admit, having a name like Jet is strange, but he wish damn Boyf didn't always bring it up.

"Oh yes, ha ha, really, can any of you be mature?" He questioned, but it only caused the men around him to laugh harder. "Oh common, respect your corporal a little would you guys?"

When the meal was finished (if you could even call random rations a meal) Connor made his way to his bunker, not a long way from the dinning grounds. Tomorrow would be a big day, they are transferring all the way to Canada, a ally base, to come in from the north to Russia. He got into his bunk, and didn't even wait for Micheal to get into the other, just turned off the lights, and took in a deep breath. "Big day ahead of you Jet" Micheal spoke and with that Connor rolled his eyes, answering a soft "yeah" and then he put himself to bed.

~~~
"Okay, so we're coming in from the Atlantic, crossing over the Nordic countries, which will include Sweden, Finland, and Denmark into Russian through plane." The men circled the board, seeing the scribbled drawings of troops, and bases, with different colored lines intersecting and pointing to different places. "Five years ago, the first wave of troops landed in Finland, then crossed over into Russia. The American troops have recently managed to take Moscow and it is now under American control after the 100 day battle. That is where sector 2 and 5 will be sent guarding the city in case the Soviet Army attacks. More instructions when dispatched." Everyone, Connor included, took the orders, and without any further instruction, headed back to their units. Connor was in charge of sector 5, it was a small group of soldiers, but with sector 5 included it would make up around 30 to 40 men.

Not to mention. A whole entire town of Russian civilians that have been held captive by the American forces. So all in all, This would be hell.
~~~