*warning- smut and dark themes*

"Shiina there's something we need to talk about."

Your mother looked nervous.

Her usual calm features, looked in turmoil as she gently grasped your wrist and led you into the kitchen.

She glanced around like she was anxious, as if someone was listening.

You could see her features in the moonlight that streamed through the windows.

She was beautiful.

Absolutely beautiful.

Beautiful long dark hair, that was never unkempt. Always pinned back, and done up. And beautiful deep blue eyes.

She looked just like Kazuki.

Which made sense.

She wasn't your biological mother, despite always treating you like you were her own child.

She was loving and kind.

Since Kazuki had passed though, she had started to spiral. Though you didn't entirely blame her, because he had been her and Shouga's only actual child.

The pain of losing a child.

Since the day he had died, the sparkle she used to have in her eyes faded.

Shouga would tell you, if she said anything out of the ordinary to come get him immediately, and ignore her words.

He told you she was crazy- and how some women 'aren't strong enough to handle death, especially their own children.'

Kazuki's death seemed to have created a ridge between them.

Or maybe it was always there and you had just never noticed.

"Shiina."

Her soft voice brought you back to reality as she gently held your face with two hands, making you look at her.

"What I am about to tell you, you cannot repeat- to anyone you can never tell anyone I told you this."

Her voice was trembling.

She was afraid.

At the time you didn't know why.

But now you knew.

She was afraid of Shouga.

And she had every right to be.

You nodded at her words.

"Shiina..."

She swallowed hard. She looked so conflicted. So worn out.

"Shouga didn't save you."

You stared at her, not understanding what she was trying to tell you.

"When you were a baby, your real mother was running- escaping something terrible."

"Shouga murdered your biological mother."

Her voice was whisper,

"So he could have you."

"You were part of a plan- from the moment you were created."

A plan?

A plan for what?

"And this is why I told you not to listen to a goddamn word the woman says."

Your gaze immediately flickered over to Shouga who was standing in the corner of the kitchen, leaning against the wall.

You hadn't even heard him walk in.

And your mother.

The look of utter terror and disgust on her features the moment she heard his deep voice.

She looked at Shouga like she hated him.

Like she hated everything about him- yet she was also so terrified.

"I'm telling her what you won't."

"Shiina she's incompetent and sick in the head," Shougas voice was low as his gaze stayed fixed on your mother, slowly walking toward her.

"She isn't your goddamn property you sick bastard." Your mothers voice shook, as she spat out the words.

"She belongs to me, I saved her."

"You didn't save her from anything- you brought her from one tragic life to another. So she could be yours to use- so you could groom her and mold her exactly into what you want."

Your mothers voice rose,

"So you could brainwash a child into thinking you were the greatest thing- look up to you, worship you- you sick bastard!"

Shougas gaze darkened.

"Watch your mouth."

"You know you used to be so beautiful, when you kept your mouth shut and used that brain of yours. You've proved to be such a useless woman."

He scoffed,

"Although I knew that from the beginning. You aren't one of us- you have no use here. Your blood- your lifeline is impure, you could've never given me what I wanted anyway."

Your mother snapped again,

"That's why you killed Kauzki? You murdered your only child, because you needed to feed the delusion that you are some kind of god."

He answered without any hesitation,

"I am."

"Shiina is."

"We are."

Your mother raised her voice,

"She isn't yours!"

"She isn't Mikami!"

"She is Donquixote!"

And that's when he lifted his hand.

A gun.

A shot.

And then there was a thud.

There was your mothers lifeless body laying on the floor of your kitchen.

Blood pooling around her, eyes still open.

Shouga's gaze flickered over to yours.

"She wasn't worth wasting my energy on."

Your eyes flickered open to the dark room. The ceiling.

Fuck.

Your breaths were heavy, as you immediately glanced over to see Law sitting up, looking at you, brows furrowed.

No no no no

I don't want to talk about this.

Not now.

Not yet.

"Shiina."

"I'm okay," you immediately responded.

"You're shaking."

You clenched your jaw hard, so hard it hurt, but anything to stop your lip from trembling, more tears from flowing as you managed to force out the words,

"Because I keep reliving all of my worst nightmares every time I fall asleep."

You couldn't look at him.

Your throat felt tight.

"Law, he shot my mother right in front of me."

"I had blood spatter... on my face and across my clothes."

"I was frozen... and her mouth was open, eyes wide still when she was limp on the floor."

You swallow hard,

"She looked so terrified. So hurt."

You went silent a moment, before you finally met Law's gaze in the darkness.

"And then looked at me, and told me she wasn't even worth using his devil fruit powers on."

"She wasn't one of us."

"So that's how she had to be killed."

He just stared at you with the same expression.

Truthfully he wasn't sure what to say.

Your nightmares had seemed to get worse- more graphic, more vivid.

He wanted to help you, to protect you, to save you from all of this but he didn't know how.

He didn't know what to say, so you spoke again,

"Law the day you found me... when I woke up everything seemed so distant. I think my brain had almost forgotten all of these things... but now..."

You let out a shaky exhale.

"Now they're fresh in my mind... and I..."

Your hands moved to wrap around your body.

Somehow you felt... so disgusted in your own skin.

So uncomfortable. Sick.

"...I feel like I'm losing my mind."

The words were barely audible.

You felt him grasp you and pull you into him, holding you as he sat.

Your back against his chest.

He could feel the warmth of your body, and the way you were trembling slightly.

He buried his face in your neck, and you could feel the way tears immediately started to stream down your cheeks before you could stop it.

"I don't understand."

You whispered, voice trembling.

"It all felt so far away."

You clenched your jaw,

"And now it feels like it's killing me."

You felt his grip on you tighten, his breaths against the skin of your neck.

Your eyes stung from the tears.

Because of the part you couldn't tell him.

You wouldn't.

Instead you decided you would make it up to him somehow.

The truth he had no idea of.

You shifted in the bed turning just enough so you could place both your hands on his face and press your lips against his.

He groaned softly, immediately returning the kiss, slightly surprised by the sudden contact. The eagerness in which you pressed your body against his, climbing on top of him, straddling him.

He broke the kiss just long enough to ask,

"What are you doing?"

You could see the concern in his gaze, the way he was searching your expression trying to make sure you were completely okay, one of his hands gently cupping your face, thumb brushing along your soft skin.

I'm apologizing.

"I want you."

His eyes widened slightly at how desperate you sounded.

The look in your eyes, the way those words sounded so perfect coming from you.

He immediately pressed his lips against yours, forcing his tongue into your mouth. You could feel the way his hands immediately grabbed your hips, pulling you against him. The familiar knot in your stomach, the heat between your legs instantly there as you could feel how hard he was.

Your lips disconnected, both of you breathless, as you uttered,

"I want you now."

His eyes widened, slightly surprised by your words,

"right now...?"

Usually he was the one that was impatient.

You nodded to confirm what he was desperately hoping for, and he didn't hesitate.

His hands moved to tug off your shirt, his mouth instantly connecting with your chest. You let out a breathless noise as a hand tangled in his hair.

"Now..."

You breathed out again.

And soon you were beneath him, as he tugged down your panties, his pants already discarded somewhere on the floor.

He buried his face in your neck as he slowly pushed himself inside of you, letting out a raspy groan.

Completely overtaken by you.

The way your body arched against his. The way your beautiful features contorted in pleasure, lips parted, pale skin flushed. The sweet soft noises you made. The way you trembled, and god- the way you felt.

But your mind was elsewhere.

You could feel your body tremble as he buried himself deep inside you, but you couldn't hear anything but the ringing in your ears.

Think anything but about what you knew.

He thought you were Corazon's.

The day he rescued you he did it because the moment he saw your drenched figure pulled from the sea, soft eyes flickering open he was reminded of Corazon.

You were familiar somehow.

You reminded him of that unconditional love he still didn't fully understand but subconsciously craved so badly.

Your fingers gripped the bed sheets, head tilting back helplessly, as you felt yourself come undone.

There were moments where he was rough. But you could see the way he always stopped himself, never wanting to hurt you.

He was terrible at expressing himself, but he showed you what he really felt. Without even meaning to.

He was complicated. Cold on the surface, and calculated. Intelligent, and unbothered. But even with his crew he cared a lot more than he let on. And he showed them too.

You must've been so important to him if he thought you were Corazon's.

You felt his body shudder, felt his teeth graze your shoulder.

You could feel the way he filled you, the way his movements became slow and sloppy.

The heavy breaths against your neck.

He has no idea.

"I... love you."

His voice was deep. Raspy.

Your eyes widened slightly when he said those words, coming back to reality for just a moment.

Just long enough to feel that sick, sinking feeling in your stomach.

Because he has no idea.

I am Donquixote Doflamingo's.