Zac had been doing really well. He was staying busy, keeping up with his friends so he could stay distracted from the ache in his heart that was slowly beginning to ease.

He was currently hanging out with his friend, Dave Franco. They'd been close since they'd worked together on Charlie St. Cloud.  They had just finished dinner and they were just sitting down in the living room when the front door flung open.

Zac stood quickly, unsure of what was happening, but he realized quickly that it was Scott.

.

Scott had a key and he thought that Zac was away so he'd just opened the door.

He looked pale and lost and sooo incredibly hurt. He looked from Zac to the other man who had stood from his seat on the couch and was looking from him to Zac, probably trying to determine whether or not he was a threat.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have.. I'm just" Scott turned to leave them alone. His brain wasn't quite functioning. Too much was happening, his world was upside down.

"No, Scott come here." Zac's worry was apparent. He looked over to Dave who seemed to sense that this was something important and quite personal. "I'll call you" He put a hand on Zac's back before walking past Scott and out the door.

Scott was just stunned. He couldn't seem to get his thoughts to catch up on the situation.

Nothing made any sense any more. Would Zac even be ok that he was here? He hadn't thought it through, he'd just gotten in the car and drove to the only safe place he knew. 

But Zac hadn't spoken to him in ages. What if he was mad?

He felt the world spinning...everything was closing in on him...

and then darkness.

He fell to floor as he fainted.

.

When he woke the first thing he saw was Zac.

He was in a bed. He assumed it was Zac's. For a moment he couldn't remember how he'd gotten there,  and then the horrible truth came rushing back to him.

.

Zac watched the emotions play out on Scott's face. He knew what had happened. Kirstie had followed Scott to his house to make sure he got there ok.

She'd come inside right after he'd fainted.

She had explained everything while he relocated Scott to his bedroom. The poor girl looked like she hadn't slept in a week, and he could only imagine how torn she was. He'd tried to convince her to stay the night, as there was a terrible storm headed their way, but she was sure she could make it before it started. He made her promise to call as soon as she made it home and she agreed before she hurried out. 

Now, sitting next to Scott, Zac was angrier than he had ever been. He'd trusted Mitch with Scott. He'd always given him the benefit of the doubt. Had he known this was going to happen he never would have. He really wanted to hurt Mitch. He wanted to go over there right then and show him the meaning of pain.

But Scott was here and he needed him.

Scott started talking, trying to tell him.

"He really..."

"It's ok. I know." Zac pulled him into his arms and held him as he sobbed against him. It was painful to watch. Zac hated Mitch for what he'd done.

He was also at a loss for words. He didn't have a clue how to make it better. He didn't have any idea how to take that pain away from him...and he gladly would have.

So he just held him. He held him and let him cry his eyes out.

.

Kirstie was fuming by the time she got back home. Thankfully she'd beat the storm, but she could hear the thunder that was headed their way. She sent off a text to Zac to let him know she was home and to let her know if Scott needed her to do anything.

She waited a couple of minutes before she got out of the car. She knew Mitch was going to be there. She had about 20 missed calls from him, there was no way he wasn't in her apartment right now.

She opened the door and, as she'd expected, Mitch was sitting on her couch, his eyes red, tears still falling from them.

She felt a pang of guilt in her heart. It was her fault. She was the reason he looked like that.

But no, he had done this. HE was the one who'd done it and nothing could compare to pain in her chest at the look on Scott's face when she'd told him.

She'd never forget that look of hurt, the pain in his voice when he had asked if she was sure. It got even worse when he'd turned those sad blue eyes to hers and asked her "why" ....

Scott, the most childlike, the one with the biggest heart, the one who had braved through his worst fears to give himself to Mitch. The man who had worked so hard to be the best he could be to give Mitch the relationship he'd deserved...

She had watched him break.

The memory caused her anger to bubble up once again.

Mitch looked at her with the saddest look she'd ever seen on his face. "He's gone. I don't know why. Why is he gone?"

Kirstie felt that guilt run through her again, but it didn't stop the bite in her voice "Because you're an asshole!"

Mitch flinched. He had no idea why Kirstie was lashing out at him. "I don't understand."

"I SAW YOU! I know what you did with Evan!!!!!" His face turned ghostly white.

"I wasn't...."

"Mitch I SAW YOU! I went to get my movie and I SAW YOU! and JEEZUS did you think i couldn't HEAR you!? You weren't exactly quiet!"

"YOU TOLD HIM!?"

"HE DESERVED TO KNOW!"

"IT WASN'T..it ..it wasn't..." Mitch was rocking slightly on the couch.

"It wasn't WHAT Mitch!? How could you do that to Scott? HOW?"

Kirstie went to say something else, but Mitch was up and gone in the blink of an eye.

She still felt responsible for breaking up her family.

But no. She couldn't feel that way. She had to stop doing that to herself or she'd go crazy. This was NOT her fault.

Mitch was responsible for breaking up her family.

And she still had no idea why.

.

Scott had finally calmed down. The tears had, for the moment, ceased.

The storm raging outside matched his mood. He had changed into a pair of Zac's pajama pants and a tee. His own smelled too much like Mitch.

He was sitting on the couch in the living room, curled up and sipping the hot tea that Zac had made him.

The electricity had just gone out moments ago, so Zac was busy lighting the fire in the fireplace and placing and lighting a bunch of candles around. He'd tried to make a joke about it being a good thing he was gay or they would be left in the dark, but neither had been able to give more than a small smile in response.

Scott watched him move around, almost mesmerized by his face in the candlelight. When Zac disappeared upstairs again he watched the shadows the flames made on the walls.

He felt safe here. Zac was his safety and his arms, his words, his voice helped him forget all of the bad things that were happening in his life.

Zac returned from his room with a blanket which he wrapped around the two of them after he sat down. Scott moved to lay against him and Zac welcomed him into his arms.

Zac would wait. He knew Scott didn't like to be pressured into talking. He'd start when he was ready.

There was about ten minutes of nothing but the sound of the rain outside, the crackling of the fire and the thunder that shook the house. 

Then finally...

"I'm stupid."

"No, Scott. He's the stupid one."

"I never should have believed that.." The tears were about to start again, his voice trembling.

"It's his loss, not yours. You are wonderful and don't think for one second that this is your fault, because you did nothing wrong."

"It wasn't even Kyle like I always thought it would be. It was this asshole guy, Evan. Mitch always pretended he hated him."

Zac lifted the tea cup from Scott's hands to put it on the side table and Scott immediately clung to him, burrowing his face into Zac's body.

He cried a bit more, but it eventually waned. He looked up at Zac.

"That guy. Is he...your boyfriend?"

Zac was confused for a moment but then he remembered Dave. "Dave? No. He's just a friend.."

Zac didn't expect the kiss that Scott answered with. It was slow and hesitant at first, but then more demanding.

"Scott.   Scottie... " he whispered out, knowing this was a bad idea. There was no way this was healthy for him to be jumping into kissing someone else this soon.

"Please" Scott's voice pleaded with him...

Zac would never have been able to fight that and he let Scott kiss him desperately.

He didn't know why Scott was kissing him, but if it helped him then he'd pretty much do anything that he asked of him.

He could taste his tears, but Scott held onto his face, his tongue sliding over Zac's as if it was something new, something he needed to learn all over again.

In reality Scott was building up a wall, rebuilding the wall that had been up before Mitch.

He would stay with Zac. He'd stay in his bubble and he'd never leave Zac's side. Zac protected him. Zac gave him what he needed. Most importantly Zac never hurt him, not like this.

Kissing Zac gave him strength, the strength he needed to guard himself.

Finally, with one last small press of lips, he put the last brick in place and pulled back to look at Zac again.

Zac was trying hard not to cry himself. The emotions crackling in the room had enough energy to match the lightning flashing outside.

"Can I stay here? With you?"

Zac rolled his eyes. "You know you've always had a place here with me."

Scott smiled for the first time that night.

They were both shaken from the distraction as someone began to pound at Zac's door. Neither had heard the car pull up.

Zac looked at him. "Stay here."

Scott nodded as Zac slid out from under the blanket and went to open the door, already knowing who was going to be on the other side.

.

Mitch looked a mess. His cheeks were wet, but Zac was sure it was probably more tears than rain.

Zac had every mind to punch him square in the face, but he managed to restrain himself for the moment.

"Please. I know he's here. I just need to I need to talk to him please." Mitch sounded desperate and his voice broke midway.

"He doesn't want to see you."

"Please. You don't understand. I have to tell him. I have to tell him it didn't mean anything! I have to tell him!"

Zac looked over at Scott. This was his battle and he would let him fight it as he wanted.

Scott couldn't see Mitch, but he could hear him clearly. He had a face like stone as he shook his head no. There was no way he could look at him yet. He couldn't.

Zac turned back to Mitch.

"He doesn't want to see you. Go home, Mitch. He closed the door and went back over to Scott who curled back into him.

He knew Mitch was still outside after fifteen minutes. He hadn't heard his car turn back on.

They waited.

Soon it had been half an hour.

"Scott, he's going to get pneumonia."

"He deserves it."

"Scottie..."

Scott knew he didn't really mean it, but he couldn't let him in. He couldn't.

They waited longer.

Fifteen more minutes passed.

Zac kept hoping Mitch would leave, but no matter how horribly he hated him, he couldn't let him freeze to death in this storm from hell.

"Look, as much as I'd love to leave him out there, I think the paparazzi would have a field day if a dancer froze to death on my doorstep."

Scott nodded. He understood. "ll be in your room. Just get him to leave."He got up and went upstairs to Zac's room and closed the door.

Zac went and got some towels and blankets and dry clothes and opened the door.

The sight was pitiful. Mitch was sitting on the steps, his knees to his chest, shaking and shivering. He was soaked to the bone.

Zac had to step out into the rain to try to get him to stand, but he couldn't get him to budge.

He finally had to resort to picking him up and carrying him inside, closing the door with his foot. He set him down on the hardwood floor. He was still the bad guy and Zac didn't get furniture wet for bad guys.

He got the towels and started drying him off. "Mitch, you gotta dry yourself off, change and warm up a bit and leave."

Mitch was ice cold. His bottom lip was trembling and his teeth were chattering.

He couldn't seem to move.

Zac was doing everything for him which really annoyed and frustrated him.

"You do realize this is your fault, right? Your own stupidity?"

Mitch turned his eyes to look at him. "I have to see him.  Please" his eyes pleaded, his voice hoarse.

Zac handed him a towel. I'll talk to him, but first you've gotta dry yourself off and change."

Mitch took the towel and slowly started drying himself off. Zac headed upstairs.

. 

Scott was sitting on the side of the bed staring at the wall when Zac reentered the room.

Mitch was downstairs. He'd been outside in the freezing cold rain for 45 minutes.

Every instinct he had wanted to run downstairs and take care of him, every single part of him yearned to.

"I'm not going down there."

"I don't expect you to." Zac was soaked with water, even his hair dripped with the rain. Scott watched him strip down and change.

"Is he ok?" He had to ask.

"He's frozen solid and all he can say is that he HAS to see you, but he'll probably be sick for a week."

Scott nodded, but inside he couldn't help but think it was karma.

Zac walked over and lifted his chin and gave him a small kiss to his forehead.  "It's gonna be OK, Scott.. Do what you want to. If you want to talk to him then do it when you're ready, on your terms, not on his."

Scott nodded.

.

Mitch had just pulled on the dry sweatpants when Zac reappeared.

Zac picked up a blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders. "Ten minutes to warm up and then you're gone."

Mitch looked at him. "I thought-"

"He doesn't want to talk to you. You can't make him."

"SCOTT!!!" Mitch yelled out suddenly, startling the other man.

"SCOTT, LISTEN PLEASE. I NEED YOU TO TALK TO ME." He practically sobbed, yelling as loud as his scratchy voice would allow him.

Zac took him by the shoulders and maneuvered him to the sofa. "Mitch, listen, when he's ready to talk to you then he'll talk to you."

"But I need him t- Scott!" Mitch's eyes move to focus on something behind Zac.

He was surprised to turn around and see Scott standing on the bottom of the stairs.

Mitch was up in a flash, pushing past Zac and heading for him.

Scott simply held up a hand and Mitch halted. Scott stood as still as a statue, his face just as expressionless.

"Baby, it didn't mean anything. I didn't mean for it to happen. Evan means nothing to me. It was a mistake! I'll never...it'll never happen again. I swear!! I SWEAR! PLEASE...please I need you." Mitch was sobbing again, his eyes were bloodshot and red and puffy from crying. "I can't live without you, please don't make me."

Scott didn't react. It was almost as if he couldn't even hear the words Mitch was saying.

"Just tell me what I have to do to fix this. I love you so much. More than anything..." Mitch dared to take a couple of steps closer.

"No. You don't love me. If you loved me then you wouldn't have hurt me." His face stayed emotionless.

"I didn't mean-" Mitch looked desperate, like he was fighting for his life. 

"Just go Mitch. It's over."

"No! No, no, no. It can't be. Please..."

Inside Scott's heart was shattering. He could feel the pain of it throughout every particle in body.

He somehow managed to not show it.

He could barely stand it as the man he loved with every fiber of his being, the man he still loved, pleaded and begged for his forgiveness.

He had to do something.

"I forgive you."

Mitch's eyes raised to his, his hope renewed. He just knew that it meant things were going to be ok, and just maybe he could breathe again.

"I forgive you, but you and me... we will never be anything ever again." Scott's gaze was unfaltering.

Mitch felt it burning down to his soul, searing it.  It burnt a hole right through his heart.

The glimmer of hope died.  His legs gave out and he fell to his knees as if he'd been shot.

Scott turned and walked back up the stairs as Mitch let his head fall to his hands.

.

Zac let him cry it out. He pitied the man on his floor. He knew what it was like to lose Scott, but not like this.¦

He couldn't even imagine Scott looking at HIM like that.

He waited nearly half an hour until Mitch finally found some composure.

Zac put his wet clothes in a bag and grabbed an umbrella and walked him out to his car. He walked inside after Mitch's car disappeared.

The storm was beginning to let up, but he called Kirstie to let her know that Mitch was leaving, just in case.

Now he had a headache.

The electricity had started to flicker back on so he made sure to blow out all the candles and put out the fire. He grabbed a couple bottles of water and went to locate some headache medication but then his gaze travelled to the bottle next to it.

Sleeping pills.

Maybe one would help Scott sleep. So he took one out and carried it up to Scott who didn't protest and took it, grateful for something to help rid him of the horrible feelings and thoughts if only for a few hours.

Zac held him close that night. It felt familiar, and strangely foreign at the same time.

But, like always, it felt safe. That's what he needed then. Safety.

It didn't take too long for dreamless sleep to claim him. Zac, however, stayed up for hours just watching the man in his arms. He hated the pain, he hated everything Scott had to go through. He'd gone through so much in his short life, and he didn't deserve any of it.  

It wasn't fair.

He was going to take care of him this time. He wouldn't let anyone hurt him again. Ever.

With that thought he finally drifted off to sleep, holding Scott close to his heart.

.

Mitch barely made it back to his loft. It was only by sheer luck that he did. Once there he couldn't do anything but sit on the couch and cry.

He couldn't sleep in the bed...there was no way.

He remembered the first night Scott had slept there. He'd slept there on that couch. He collapsed over onto his side and cried. He cried himself into a sleep filled with terror and nightmares.

He slept with the sound of Scott's voice echoing in his mind.