Joe laid in his bed in Sheffield that night, not able to fall asleep in any way. He was exhausted like never before in his life, the recording and the things Mutt expected of him to do with his voice were the biggest challenges he had ever faced.

They had been in the studio that day, recording and practising like crazy. Phil Collen, their new member and replacement for Pete Willis, was doing great so far, he and Steve were done with recording their parts in the quickest way of them all. Rick still had that teenager attitude and it caused him to stubbornly argue with Mutt about some drum fill-ins, which resulted in him needing a lot more time to be done with recording. Joe always tried to keep him from getting angry about the things Mutt wanted him to do, but it never actually worked completely. At some point in time, it was predictable that Rick would lose his nerve and walk out for a quick jog around the block to calm himself. Afterwards, he was always in a better mood and managed to get most of the things he had to do done quickly. And then there was their quiet bassist who always just sat there and played around on his instrument, waiting for his turn and being very focused on his task.

Sav was Joe's best friend and he was the only one that could convince him into doing what he thought was impossible, at least concerning the singing parts. And he was good-looking too. His face was surrounded by a mess of dark blonde curls, his eyes had the colour of two perfectly polished sapphires and his lips were plump and pink. But the main thing that Joe loved about his outward appearance was his wide and true smile whenever he looked at him. Joe was hooked on the sparkles that came to his eyes whenever he smiled, on the way he showed off so much happiness with just one expression.

The singer knew that he was sexually attracted to his best friend, hell, how could anyone not be? But slowly but surely he came to the conclusion that it wasn't only that. Those endless talks they had whenever they sat together in the evenings and the trust and closeness between them had caused something else to develop deep inside Joe's heart. First, it had only shown itself in the form of possessiveness and jealousy whenever Sav had fun with someone else but that was soon accompanied by a flutter in his belly whenever those blue blue eyes looked into his own. And then he knew which feeling had grown inside him. It was love. He had fallen in love with Sav, his bassist and best friend.

He was scared of himself and the situation. How the hell could he continue his everyday life with Sav by his side as only his best friend? He knew he would fail at that right from the start, but he tried either way. It couldn't be that hard, right?

Sav had been in the recording booth to record the bass line for 'Photograph', one of the songs they knew would be a single and maybe even a hit right from the start. He had tried over and over again with Mutt guiding him, the latter always not being completely satisfied and the poor bassist feeling more pressured by the moment. And as Mutt cut off the tape and told him to try again for another time, he just needed to take a break. Carefully placing his bass back on its stand and hanging his headphones onto their hook on the wall he left the recording booth, coincidentally running into Joe on his way out due to the sole focus on his whirling thoughts.

"Oh, I'm sorry", he just mumbled quietly in apology and his best friend directly knew something was wrong. So he kept the bassist from walking away by grabbing one of his upper arms in a gentle but firm grip, Sav's gaze directly snapping up to meet his. Joe could see the desperation and exhaustion in his eyes, the sight making his heart hurt. Sav was supposed to be happy, forever and always, and there was just no way Joe would leave him with that expression on his face.

"Hey, what's on your mind, mate?"

Sav lowered his head again at that question to hide behind his long bangs, a shiver running through his body. Not knowing the cause but interpreting it as a bad thing, the singer released Sav's arm, pulling him into a warm hug instead. Well, partly because he was concerned and partly because he used every single occasion that presented itself to be close to his best friend.

His heartbeat hitched as Sav returned the hug, nuzzling his face against the soft fabric of his shirt and taking a deep shuddery breath that he could feel on his skin. Still not looking back up, the bassist then began to speak, his calloused fingerpads digging into Joe's back to ground himself somewhat.

"It's just... I fuck it up every time. It's my fault we can't go on with the guitar and vocal parts already. And besides that, I'm the worst bassist that ever walked this earth, I try so hard but it never works out how it's supposed to."

His voice broke after those words, the lump in his throat becoming too constricting to gulp it away once more. Joe felt warm tears soaking through the fabric of his shirt soon after, the sniffles accompanying them making it very clear that the poor bassist had a little breakdown.

Pulling him in closer, Joe soothingly ran his hands over his best friend's back until his sniffles turned into small hiccuping breaths and finally subsided completely.

"You're definitely not the worst bassist on earth Sav, actually I'd say you're the best one I've ever known. And don't you dare to feel bad for us not being able to record our parts because of you. I'm very glad Mutt hasn't dragged me in there yet to have me doing things my throat will never ever be able to do. And besides that, it's not your fault Mutt lets you repeat it again and again till your fingers bleed. It's just that way because Mutt is a perfectionist. You have to try to tell yourself that it will be worth it, okay? Then you'll feel better."

Sav looked up at Joe through his bangs at that, his sparkling blue eyes holding weak happiness in them. Joe smiled at that, gently pushing the curly dark blonde strands out of his eyes and wiping the already-drying tear streaks off his rosy cheeks. And just then he noticed how close they stood to each other.

"Thank you, Joe. Would you do me a favour?", Sav asked, his breath warm against Joe's cheek and the latter had to close his eyes and will his racing heart back into a normal and steady rhythm before he was able to answer properly.

"Of course, what would that be?"

"Can you join Mutt up in the control room and look at me through the window? I think I would feel a lot calmer that way and maybe not mess up so easily. Y'know, mental company."

Joe nodded at that with a smile on his face, letting go of the bassist reluctantly and giving him a light clap on the back.

"Sure thing. I'm already on my way over there."

So the two of them parted completely again, Sav leaving back into the recording booth and Joe walking along a short hallway to the control room, willing himself to calm back down already as he opened the door of the small room and took a seat beside Mutt in front of the mixing console. Just then Sav walked back into the room, placing his headphones over his ears again and picking up his bass, glancing over to the window and, seeing Joe looking right back at him, starting to smile.

"You wanna give it another try, Sav?"

Sav nodded in response to Mutt's question, working his fingers shortly over the fretboard to warm them up again before giving their producer a thumbs-up to let him know he could start the tape. He did so and Sav's eyes immediately locked on Joe's, the determination in them making the singer smile. They held the gaze for the whole song, Sav's fingers dancing over the strings with a kind of ease that hadn't been there before while Mutt nodded along to the beat, finally stopping the tape with a smile on his face.

"There! You did it!"

Sav's face was invaded by a bright and wide smile at that, the one that made Joe's knees get a bit weak nowadays. He simply placed his bass back on its stand and hung his headphones on the headstock, leaving the recording booth and jogging up to Joe and Mutt in the control room.

Just seconds later he entered it, earning a high-five from Mutt and offered open arms from Joe. He moved into the latter almost directly with a wide smile, snuggling into Joe's chest and closing his eyes.

"See? I told you you aren't a bad bassist", Joe whispered into the curly hair of his best friend, feeling and hearing him chuckle against his chest. His heart did a stutter again at that feeling and he willed himself to behave. It wouldn't be good if he lost his control and kissed the delighted man in his arms. Something like that would end very badly and destroy everything their friendship was made of, he was sure of that. So he gently extricated himself from the warm embrace that had lasted a bit too long to be solely friendly and cleared his throat, trying to occupy himself with something else than looking at the gorgeous bassist.

"Joe? Is everything alright?", Sav asked softly with a worried undertone in his voice, gently placing one hand on the singer's shoulder.

Joe immediately knew why Sav was worried. He had never pulled out of a shared embrace before but he had to do it now in order to stay somewhat sane. It was quite scary how big the impact the bassist's presence had on him really was. So the singer flinched away from the caring hand on his shoulder, not even daring to take a look into his best friend's eyes since he knew his happy expression had dropped to a concerned and hurt one. He couldn't stand to see him sad and upset because he knew his resolve of staying away from the bassist would crumble the second their eyes locked.

"Joe? What's wrong?", Sav tried again, his voice heavily laced with concern and hurt now. Joe visibly flinched at that tone, his heart clenching and demanding he just moved back into Sav's embrace. But he couldn't, gulping heavily instead and keeping his head down.

"I'm sorry, I think I'm not able to record today. See you all tomorrow", he finally got out in a whisper, turning around without looking back and leaving through the door, making his way down the few hallways until he found himself out on London's streets.

Taking deep calming breaths of the fresh air, he looked up at the cloudy sky of early March, damning himself internally that he had left his best friend all confused and sad behind even though he had done absolutely nothing wrong. He knew that the younger man would work himself up over the topic and it made him frown, his heart thumping against his ribcage and hurting him with each beat.

Why did he do this to himself? Was all of this even worth the pain? What if Sav wouldn't hate him? What if he felt the same way Joe did? His heartbeat sped up at the thought of that sole possibility. But his mind quickly gained control again, letting him know that Sav would never. Never in his life would he think about the singer in the same way.

Coming to that conclusion, Joe just made his way back to his apartment, almost directly getting himself ready for bed and laying down. He wasn't even hungry which was something highly unusual for him. He only behaved that way when something went wrong between him and Sav, which normally didn't happen at all. But lately, there had been that weird kind of tension between them, making hugs awkward and gazes more strained. Joe was almost completely sure that it was because of his change of feelings towards his best friend. And Sav obviously had picked up on the fact that there was something going on but he hadn't -Joe silently prayed for that- noticed what it was all about.

Tossing and turning in his bed, Joe finally fell into an uncomfortable sleep, his dreams twisting around in his mind and preventing him from getting any rest. He was so damn screwed.