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8

Gov: Wow, you're an evil genius. Next time I want to hurt someone, I'm coming straight to you.
Florida: Aww. That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.

Oregon: Hey, Cali!
California: Oregon, good to see you!
Oregon: Florida's here too
Florida: Yo!
California: [look of disappointment]

Gov: Hi
Gov: You guys are terrifying
Gov, to Louisiana: You less so
Gov, to Florida: You the most

California: nonono
California: Not only did god say "we're gonna make you depressed" he also said we're gonna make you
California: ✨gay✨

California: I moved to LA, right? 
Old DC: uh huh
California: and... I tried the devil's lettuce 
Old DC: 
Old DC: is that a salad-

Florida: and then it goes
Florida: [dancing] mi pazu- are you listening?
Florida: mi pazuzuzuzuzuzu
Florida: and then I go [clicks tongue]
Florida: and then we slide out
Florida: and you do it quickly and we do it together
Mass, who just wanted some silence: 
Florida: and when you first start you hit your right
Florida: you hit your right first
Florida: Do you understand?
Mass: [realizing he should've locked his door]
Florida: I hope you do 'cause we're gonna keep doing it till you get it right

California: god damn it
California: What's your sexuality?
California: We can't possibly all be gay it's not mathematically possible
California: somebody needs to be that stupid hetero

Texas: The power of Christ compels you
Florida: Does it, Tex? 
Texas: The power of Christ compels you!
Florida: Is the power of Christ compelling me? Is that what's happening? 
Texas: The power of Christ compels you!
Florida: [laughing] Guess what, it's not that compelling

Elizabeth: Thank you for getting the door for me, your future husband will be lucky to have such a gentleman
Texas: [internally] how did she know I'm gay? what the fuck? I didn't tell her that

Washington: Not wearing glasses anymore, I've seen enough

California: Stop acting dumb
Florida: bitch who said I was acting

Gov: No gain only pain

California: for low self esteem reasons I will now take that compliment as an insult

Florida: oops I did it again
Florida: I played with 
Florida: MY HEART

California: You can't surprise me anymore
California: letting me into your life was the worst mistake you ever did
Gov: Cool
Gov: Fun take on our relationship

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Tags: #benbrainard