One months later:

Swara p.ov.:

It's been one month of our marriage. " Marriage"? I questioned myself. There's is nothing like marriage in this relationship. Love, well that's for only me because I love him more than anything.. support, I don't think so I will ever have from my husband and trust, base of any relationship.. but when then is no relationship then what's the stupid questions of trust. In this one month, nothing has changed. Sanskar was always rude to me. He taunt me ,blame me for Making his life upside down. Sometime, I feel guilty that I forced myself on him. I forced him this forced relationship but thinking about something, I compose myself. He will get his freedom soon anyway. Like he said after six month, he will divorce me and waiting each and every moment for that day when he will able to get rid of me. Thinking this I chuckled to myself. Divorce?? Will he even need that to be separated from me? My eyes turned teary thinking it.

I always dream to have love marriage since the time I came to know about mom and dad love story. Mom and dad loved each other so much.. and got married but mom left us alone in this world then also dad never stopped loving her. He didn't do second marriage. He still says that mom lives in his heart. I always dreamed to have a prince who will love me unconditionally and I will be mad in his love. When I saw sanskar first time ,I knew that I got my prince but this love story have little change.. this prince don't love princess.. but princess is mad for him. It's weird but this love story will be incomplete always.

I never tried to mend this relation because I don't want to. We can never force anyone to love us right? I silently bear his frustration and anger but never tried to raise my voice against him. Its not that I don't get hurt. Hurt is now the small word that I feel. It's worst pain when the person whom u love is the reason of pain and happiness both. Yes, happiness because Everytime I see him, my heart feel so much happiness and calmness. I feel myself away from any kind of fear.

And others ( family) , well they are true family. Sanskar is really lucky to have them in his life. No one talk to me nicely.. well that's not their mistake. It's mine. I really love this bonding in this family that they share. I wish to be part of them but next second I stop myself. I just can stand in side corner and smile looking at them. I m only the extra person in between them. Well their anger is justified.
I go to meet my dad every weekend and spend whole day with him. No one in maheshwari family care to know. I just Inform them and go but do they care? No, why would they? It's good for them if I stay away from them. Dad really get concerned for me as he knows everything. I smiled sadly thinking all this.

Right now, I m in car going back to mm after meeting my dad. The car is moving and I was looking outside but suddenly something caught my attention. Then only car stopped because of red signal.
I look closely if I was wrong but no he was sanskar sitting in restaurant with a girl. But that wasn't big thing, something that Peirce my heart was the scene that I was witnessing from the glass window of the restaurant. He was holding a rose ,then he go on his knees. The girl smiled and took the rose from him.. then made him stand..and hugged him.

Tear filled my eyes and within a second it fell from my eyes. The car started moving and I started crying. I pressed my lips and cry silently.
Was that he wanted to say when he told I spoiled his life? Was that the reason he can't love me? He love someone else. I never come to know about it, I never knew that he love someone .may be he was hiding it from his family and everyone.
How can he do this to me? My heart questioned but my mind knew that I did wrong with him. I came in between. It pains to know that he don't love u whom u love more than anything but it pains beyond limit knowing he love someone else..

After sometime, I arrived mm.. I rushed to my room directly and lay on couch covering my face with pillow. I don't know till when i was sobbing continuously. I was not able to erase that scene what I saw. It was again and again playing in front Of my eyes. I tried to console myself that it may be some misunderstanding the situation but there was something inside me that again broke me and I couldn't help myself not to cry harder. It was already evening I don't know when I fell asleep as I felt sharp pain in my body.

Next morning:

I woke up only to find him lying on the bed. I find myself still in those clothes in which I came back. I reminded I didn't changed but then I remembered yesterday and those scene again come as flashes in front of my eyes. Before I again start crying, I tried to compose myself and took my clothes and went inside washroom.. after sometime, I came out of washroom and find him awake.. I didn't said anything like always. I go to dressing table and get ready. He go inside washroom taking his clothes. Then only my phone rang. It was dad. I talk to him. I tried to be normal but he easily can figure out that I wasn't. I somehow convinced him that I was okay and hang up the call.

I was sitting on couch thinking about yesterday. Then only sanskar come out of washroom. He look at me but then ignore. He get ready.. I look at him through mirror but then his eyes caught mine. I averted my gaze.. battling with my inner self should I ask? I was playing with my fingers and tapping my feet on the floor. I can feel he was looking at me.

After gathering some courage ,I thought to ask him.. before he go out of room.
Me: um.. sa.. sanskar..

He look at me as he was taking his accessories from drawer.
Sanskar: what? ( Rude as usual)

Me: who was that girl?( I asked straight, well I didn't wanted to move in round and round path before coming to point)

Sanskar: who? ( Confused)
Me: I saw u yesterday with some girl ,in .. in restaurant.
He thinks a bit but then his expression turned stern. He walk toward me and hold my hand jerking me toward him harshly such that I collapse on him.

Sanskar: why? And who r u to question? Were u spying on me?

Me: no, I was just coming after meeting dad then.. aah!!

He twisted my hand at my back and it hurt.
Sanskar: whatever!! But I think u still didn't get my point when I told u not to interrupt in my life. U r not part of it so stay out of it ( he roared)
But still just for ur satisfaction, yes she is my girlfriend. The girl whom I wanted to marry..I love her.. Any problem? I don't accept u as my wife so don't react like one. On second thought,even if u have problem.. I don't give a damn to it.. understand!!

I didn't know how but I was crying. It wasn't the physical pain that he was hurting by twisting my arm.. but it was pain of heart when he said he love her. I came in between them. But to his surprised I just smiled.
He looked at me as if I have gone mad.

Me: no, I don't have any problem and will never have. It's good u love her and their will be someone to take care of u after I will leave...

His grip loosen in shock. I take my hand away from his hold.

I continue: one more thing, I never forget that u will never accept me as ur wife neither I want to force my right on u. It's just that... Umm.. leave that. I m happy for u. I hope she will keep u happy unlike me.

Only I knew what I was going through while those words were slipping from my tongue but I masked it accept those tears which were revealing that I was broken . I look at him but then averted my gaze and go from there because I knew that I can't handle myself anymore. I rush to garden and sit there. I break down completely.

Sanskar p.ov.:

I was shocked after hearing her ,what she said. I don't think there will be any wife in this world who would like to see her husband with someone else then what was that. One side she said she love me which is no way I m gonna believe. And after listening what she just said, it's quite clear. She never loved me. But just for some stupid infatuation she made game of both of our lives.

I still can't figure out what she is getting in doing all this. No one is this family like her.. infact they find ways to stay away from her. Some times I do feel bad for her but those feelings doesn't remain longer.. it vanishes as soon as those things come in front of my what me and my family had to go through when her father blackmailed me. I just don't want to have any feeling for her accept anger. Yes, that's right. Everytime I see her... I just can't help myself to not to get angry. I just take my frustration out on her.

In this one month, I don't think I have ever talk to her nicely but weird part is that she never replied back or get angry. She calmly bear my hatred and anger. Everyday, I just wait for the day when she will be out of my life. I talked to lawyer on the day of marriage itself and he told I have to wait atleast for six month. If that ,then be it like that. But I sweared to make her life hell.

Every weekend she go to her father house.. well that's the only relief for me. I can stay away from her and be calm.

Yesterday, I was working in my office when I got call from Rehan, my friend to meet him at nearby restaurant. I wrapped my work and go to restaurant. Only to find him with Nisha. She was his fiancee and also good friend of mine. They are getting married next month in Jaipur ( destination wedding). I was happy for them. Finally he is getting settled. Well, he is lucky he is getting married to the girl he like. unlike me I thought. It's not that I don't like swara, she may be nice girl but only fact of blackmailed marriage is enough to ignore the anger inside me.
We were having fun. Nisha told how he rehearsed more than 100 times before proposing her because he was getting scared of her. Rehan made face and I laugh.
" As if u can propose in a second" Rehan challenge me.

" Of course I can" I replied.

" Okay let's see" Rehan said.
" okay, Now, u get aside" I told him and he get up from chair and stand one side.

I took rose that was in the beaker with water. I hold it and go on my knee..

" Nisha, u r the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my life and I want to make my life beautiful with your presence. I want to live my whole life with u. I really love u so much.. will u marry me?" I kept it simple but that few lines only made Rehan burn in jealousy and only to make it worst. Nisha hugged me.

" That was so simple but too cute, see how easily he said" Nisha said.

"That's because he was just acting, I really love u.. both are different.. and sanskar, she is my fiance.. stay away okay?" Rehan said.

"Who challenged me? U only na?, I just gave u demo" I smirked at him.

He gave annoyed look while I and Nisha laughed at him.
I came mm at night and went to my room.. only to find her sleeping on couch. She was in beautiful pink anarkali suit. Her face was dugged in pillow and her hair strands were covering her face. I don't know why, I felt sudden urge to remove that hair lock from her face and see her but then I come to my world and scold myself for loosing myself. Seriously what was that!! But why she was sleeping in suit. She generally wear night gown while sleeping. Seriously sanskar!! Now u see that also!! I muttered some curse to myself and went to washroom. After changing, I go to have dinner and came to know that she didn't have dinner.. but then I thought she will have later like she usually do alone. I came back to room and go to sleep.

Next morning, I get up and see her coming out of washroom and go to dressing table. I go to washroom taking my clothes. After sometime I came back. She was sitting on couch doing nothing, actually playing with her fingers and tapping her feet continuously on floor. What's wrong with her? Then I see her looking at me through mirror but then she averted her gaze and look away.
After getting ready, I was taking my wallet from the drawer when I heard her.
I was amused with her question. Which girl she was asking about. Then she told some girl she saw in restaurant with me yesterday. Now I got it, she was talking about Nisha. So, she saw me there but was she was keeping eye on me. I go to her and pulled her harshly toward me.
She stumble with word that saying she saw me when she was coming after meeting her dad but couldn't complete and winced in pain as twisted her arm behind and shout on her. Who was she to question me? Why do she care because I don't accept her my wife. Something inside angered me and I told that she was my girlfriend and I wanted to marry her.
I could see her face that was expressing her pain.. and then a tear slide down from her eye following by others.. but then something surprised me. She smiled with tears.
Has she gone mad? I asked myself.
Then I heard something I never expected she would say.
"no, I don't have any problem and will never have. It's good u love her and their will be someone to take care of u after I will leave..."

I was shocked and my grip loosen. She freed herself from my hold and told she don't want to force her wifey right on me and will never do.. and told that girl will keep me happy unlike her.
That was really out of my imagination. How can she say that so easily. I still can't able to understand it. But why it's bothering me?

"May I come in sir?? "

I came back from my trace hearing the knock on the door of my cabin. It was Raina.

" Come in" I said.

She came inside and explained me about the meeting that was scheduled in two hours . I nod and told her to prepare for it. She nods and was going out but I stopped her.

"Raina, one min.." I said.
" Yes sir" she replied.

" I don't want any disturbance for sometime, untill it's too important." I told her.
She nods and go out.

I closed my eyes and rest my head back on chair. Her words still roaming around my mind.

"It's good u love her and their will be someone to take care of u after I will leave..."

God!! Why it's bothering me and I can't get rid of it from my mind. Its so frustrating. I ran fingers through my hair in frustration and tried to calm down but nothing is happening. DAMN IT!!

To be continued.....