Harry Potter's POV:

I was heartbroken. The world had ripped out my heart, thrown it on the floor and waltzed over it with Bellatrix Lestrange's high heels.

It was unbelievable how they'd used me. Everyone had known, it had just been a scheme. Even Ron and Hermione knew what had to happen, they were like puppets, faking everything.

In our fourth year, after Voldemort had reincarnated, Dumbledore had asked Ron, Hermione and Ginny to come to his office, where he told them I had to die.

He said that I had to hunt down Horcruxes, he even told them where to look for some! They knew he'd die, they knew Snape was a good man, they knew everything!

Ron and Hermione only stayed friends with me for Dumbledore, Ginny only went out with me for Dumbledore, the order only told me the things I know for Dumbledore! If it hadn't been for him, the Weasleys would have kicked me out a long time ago because I put them in danger, and even Umbridge was only appointed to teach me how to be a leader, thanks to the DA!

I almost screamed in frustration at the memories. After the war, I was no longer 'The boy who lived', I was 'That guy who could have prevented ____'s death'. The ministry gave me one more chance of getting into Auror training: get Draco Malfoy to Hogwarts, and now I messed that up, they'll miss me like bogies.

There was only one person whose friendship had been sincere: Luna Lovegood. She was always there, knowing what I needed, whether it was a hug, someone to talk to or just being on my own. She'd kept me from the temptation of alcohol and helped me dragging myself through the summer. And it was her who I sat opposite of in our compartment on the Hogwarts Express.

She looked different than she had before the war. Her hair was much shorter now, and the tips of her blonde locks were a light shade of purple, a colour she changed every other day. Her eyes didn't bulge anymore, and there was a small tattoo on her wrist, of three tiny stars. It was as though the Luna Lovegood who'd sat in the same compartment as me three years ago was a mask she'd pulled over this perfect version of herself.

'Harry?'

My head snapped up at the sound of her voice, 'Yes, Luna?'

'Do you think it would be a good idea to make sunflowers in a creamy sort of white, and call them moonflowers?'

I opened my mouth and closed it again a few times, before finally being able to respond; 'How in the name of Merlin's pointy nose did that occur to you?'

She smiled warmly, 'You were watching my tattoo. It got me thinking about other objects in the sky, and I wondered whether or not to count clouds as that. Then I thought about lightning, followed by your scar. That got me thinking about the time I've known you. I recalled the wedding of Bill and Fleur, where I wore a sunflower in my hear, do you remember that?'

I nodded, 'Didn't you get bitten by a gnome?'

Luna smiled again, 'I did. At that time, I actually thought of getting married in a dress decorated with sunflowers. Maybe even in one made out of them. But then I'd need white sunflowers, probably. So I thought about white sunflowers for a moment, and then I came up with a name.'

I raised my eyebrows, 'That is a lot of thoughts, in very little time.'

As if it was a cue, we both burst into laughter. We couldn't stop for a few minutes, even though, recalling it, it was not really that funny.

'Seriously though, I'd go for a dress decorated with sunflowers, yellow ones. They're more cheerful. Or just break tradition, white is not that interesting a colour.'

She nodded, 'But grey, on the other hand, is. If you get it by mixing black and white, it is really bizarre. White is said to be every colour, and black the absence of colour. So grey is every colour mixed with no colour at all.'

We talked about colours for a while, it was a conversation more interesting than you'd think before Luna headed to the bathroom so we could both change into our robes with privacy.

It was more out of habit, Luna had let me say at the house where she and her father lived over the summer, and we'd gone swimming a lot, so to see her half-naked was not as uncomfortable as it would have been with Ginny, who'd been very prudent, not that I minded, of course. The only thing that made me angry was the reason; that her feelings were not real, and she, therefore, didn't want to go too far.

I clenched my fists at the thought, looking at the faint scars on the back of my hand.

I must not tell lies.

I didn't, but they all did. Everyone just used me as a marionette, performing the dances they didn't dare dancing. The waltzes with fear, the boogie-woogie with death, they made me shuffle with grief.

'Harry?'

Her voice made my head snap up once again, and she wrapped her arms around my neck.

'Don't go hating people, it makes you vulnerable for Nargles.'

Despite everything, I laughed. I honestly loved Luna, platonically. She was my sister, at least I felt that way.

'Thanks, Luna. You're amazing.'

She smiled sadly, 'Anyone would have done the same.'

I shrugged, 'They should've, but they didn't. Only you.'

I buried my face in the crook of her neck. She was hardly shorter than I was, and it felt natural to be held by her, the gesture would always calm me down, and she was the thought that gave me the strength to conjure a Patronus these days, for the only memories I knew were real, were the ones of her.

When the train stopped, and we went for the carriages, I shot one glance at the familiar faces of Ron, Hermione and Ginny. At that moment, I realised how, despite Luna's calming words, every ounce of love I'd felt for them had been transformed into hate.