Chapter ELEVEN

Christmas Eve arrived fast, and even though I was off work, I was headed to the mall. Turner Hill Mall had the best Santa, hands down. I knew we had to get there early to get in line, too.

I drove up to Kaden and Dane's mom's house, turning off my car. It was just before 10A.M. when I walked up to the house and knocked. I had tossed on some jeans and a sweater, barely brushed my hair and grabbed a coffee, after sleeping in that morning.

Rylee was in the most adorable red Christmas dress and white tights, with her hair in pig tails. Her little black boots were nicer than mine. I knew that Kaden's mom liked to spoil her.

"She's so excited," Kaden's mom, Julie, told me, letting me inside. "She says she's asking Santa to bring her a kitty."

"Ohh..." I smiled at her, scooping up Rylee. "I love your hair, girly."

"Nana did it," Rylee grinned.

"Give Nana a kiss, Ry," Julie said a moment later, then added, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye Nana," the little girl giggled, after kissing her cheek.

I buckled her into the car seat that travelled between mine and Kaden's cars, then got into my seat. The radio blasted Jingle Bell Rock as I started the car, and the ten minute drive to the mall flew by. Rylee was like my little buddy, and I loved hanging out with her.

Pulling into the parking lot, I felt overwhelmed by how busy it was. I let myself take a deep breath before getting out and going around to get Rylee out of her seat.

"Santa?" she asked, a big smile on her face.

"Yes, we just have to go in and wait in line," I told her, keeping her on my hip as I shut the car door.

"I tell Santa I want a kitty," she went on, squeezing her little arms around my neck.

"Okay," I agreed. "I'll get you an ice cream after if you are really good while we wait."

"I be good!" she squealed.

The line already had about twenty kid and adults in it when we approached. I knew the line went fairly quickly, but even twenty or thirty minutes waiting with a three year old could be torture. Most of the kids were either whining or hyper, but Rylee remained fairly patient. She really wanted that ice cream.

As we got closer to the front of the line, I saw her eyes grow bigger. She likely didn't remember the previous year's Santa visit. She cried, a lot, and Kaden had to leave with her before we even made it to Santa's lap. Now, she was amazed and bewildered. She was so happy.

"Santa's elves?" she asked me, pointing to two teenage girls dressed in elf costumes. They were handing out candy canes.

"Yep. It's almost your turn," I told her.

As I turned out to look at the ever-growing line behind us, someone caught my eye. He was tall, with black jeans and a plaid shirt, dark hair that looked freshly cut. He was cute, actually hot, and exactly my type - not that I'd dated in years. He was just walking past the Santa enclosed area. He didn't look my way, or see me staring. But I watched him until he was out of sight, and then when I looked back ahead of us, an elf was waving us forward.

"Your turn," I said to Rylee, grabbing her hand.

She did, indeed, ask Santa to bring her a kitty, and added she'd like a Barbie, too. She smiled for a photo and happily took the candy candy from the other elf on the way out of Santa's Village. Success.

"You were so good," I told her, scooping her up again. "You want to get ice cream now?"

It was almost lunch time, so I figured I'd get us each a slice of pizza, too.

Rylee shrugged. "I got candy cane."

"Oh, right. Okay, pizza?" I asked.

Her little eyes lit up. "Yes!"

"Okay, let's go by JumpFit to say hi to Finn first?" I suggested.

Rylee knew who Finn was, because Kaden often brought her by the gym when I was working, to say hi. A few times, Kaden and Rylee had invited Finn and I to their apartment for dinner.

"Yay, Finn!" Rylee yelled, waving her arms around.

I put her down and opened her candy cane, then gave it to her as we walked down towards the gym. She popped the end into her mouth, then reached up for my hand.

"How was Santa?" Finn asked her right away, as we approached the desk at JumpFit.

Finn always looked at me with a certain look, like he was just genuinely happy to see me. It was nice, but somehow it felt sort of heartbreaking.

"I got candy cane," Rylee told him, showing him her treat.

"I see that," Finn laughed, then looked at me again. "What are you doing here?"

I shrugged. "Just came to say hi before we go get lunch."

"Oh." He looked intrigued, glancing at Rylee again. "Cool. It's pretty dead in here."

I looking around the gym and noticed that he was right. A guy was on a treadmill, an older woman lifting some weight in the back corner. There was no one in line, or in the front area.

"I sent Sierra home, since no one came in for the morning classes, and we close at four," Finn went on.

"Good call," I nodded. "The mall is crazy. I guess everyone is shopping rather than working out."

"I have to get a few gifts when I'm done here," he laughed.

"Seriously? Procrastinate much?" I teased him, as Rylee tugged on my hand.

"Pizza?" she asked, looking up at me.

"Yeah," I nodded at her. Finn kept his eyes on me. "Have a great Christmas," I told him.

We did not, in fact, talk much after our evening together the other night. I made a point not to sleep over, ever, even though it was pretty late, so I made an excuse that I had to get up early and left. Of course, I will filled with shame about it the entire drive home.

Finn lifted his chin and then dropped it again, half nodding. I knew he was somewhat upset with me, while also wanting more. "You too. Bye, Rylee."

"Merry Kissmas, Finn," she called over her shoulder at him.

I glanced back at Finn before pushing open the door to leave the gym, seeing the sadness in his eyes for a split second before he turned away. Someone was pulling the door open at the same time, so the door flung open a bit fast. The guy stepped back, holding the door open for us. When I looked at him to say thank you, I realized it was the same guy that I'd noticed when we were in the line for Santa. Up close, though, I realized something else. He was familiar. He kept a straight face, his eyes on mine. I nodded, squeezing Rylee's hand, and then forced myself to take another step. He didn't look exactly like him, but he felt like him. And I knew it was him, but I still had to walk away.

"Arden?" his voice called after me, sounding unsure.

I looked back, against my better judgement. Of course it was him. I would have known it with my eyes closed. I shook my head at him though, picked up Rylee and kept walking.