Chapter 11-Oho! Potions with the Slug (Part Two)

Remus winced at the harsh remark, but couldn't help but say: "A bit of both actually."

Lily snorted and continued back to stirring her potion.

"Look, Lily, will you please-"

"Three, four, five..." She carried on counting in her stirring.

"Just give James a-"

"Six, seven, eight, nine..."

"Chance, because he really-

"Ten, eleven, twelve..."

"Likes you and-"

"I don't, thirteen, fourteen, want to, fifteen, sixteen, hear it, Remus." She said in between counts.

Remus cursed. "But Lily-"

"I don't, seventeen, eighteen, want to, nineteen, hear it, TWENTY!"

Remus knew not to push it, and this was one of those times. He knew when girls were pissed off that you basically had to leave them alone – he was an intelligent guy.

"Well, this doesn't look like a good time..." He cowered under Lily's glare. "Bye then!" He hurried off back to his seat. Sirius gave him an inclining look but Remus simply just shook his head. Sirius grimaced, knowing that one Marauder was down and only two remained.

"How's your potion, Sirius?" Peter asked, mainly because he wanted anything to compare to his potion which was spitting and giving him sunburn.

"Not good, Wormtail," Sirius replied. He scooped a spoon into his cauldron which broke, leaving the bottom of the utensil stuck in his potion of sludge.

"When it does that, it is a clear sign that you are not supposed to drink it," Remus acknowledged.

"You may be right," Sirius wagged a finger at him. "I call it," he suddenly took on an impressive French accent, "Potion a La Crap!" He raised his hands in the air. Knowing he was doing exceptionally poor at the class, he quickly made another comment to Professor Slughorn.

"If only I were twenty years older and a woman, sir!"

Slughorn laughed.

"Will you stop sucking up to The Slug." James scowled for the hundredth time that morning. "Major vomiting-ness."

"Prongs, you know how much I suck at Potions. This is the only way I can get my grades up," Sirius murmured to him. "Oh, Professor," he turned to Slughorn again, "You are the best teacher ever, Horace!"

Slughorn heightened his stance, which didn't make him any taller. "Well, I do have great knowledge in the Wizarding field of Potions making, and my teaching techniques are rather envied by others."

"Maybe I should try sucking up to The Slug," Peter said, prodding his potion that had oddly turned solid.

"Sorry, Wormtail," Sirius patted him on the back, "Only I can pull it off."

"Instead of sucking up, why don't you just study more?" Remus suggested, and then regretted the suggestion when Sirius barked a laugh and remembered that Sirius and endless hours of studying would only be something he would see in a parallel universe - which was also too bad because he didn't believe in them as he thought they were scientifically incorrect.

"Okay, your turn, Pete," Sirius informed the boy.

"W-what? W-what's my turn?"

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Your turn to talk to Evans."

"What?" Peter said shrilly. "M-me t-talk to a...g-g-g-g-"

"Girl, yes, Pete." Sirius finished and pushed him away from his desk and into the deadly aisle. He walked over to Lily's desk, head bowed as he concentrated on looking at his shoes, which was pretty stupid as he only realised he was at Lily's desk when he knocked into it, causing her to go into hysterics.

Lily gave Peter a quick glance and returned back to reading her Potions book, hoping the boy to simply be a horrible mirage. She was not best pleased to see Peter there when she took a second peek.

"What do you want?" she demanded.

Peter turned an abnormal white. "Er...Uh...um," he fumbled, saying all the words that were ever acknowledged when a person tries to make words with their mouths but only bits of it come out. "WillyougooutwithJames?" He said in one breath.

Lily gave him a disturbed look, before saying a toneless "no..."

"Okaysorryforbotheringyou!" Peter squeaked, and then sprinted back to his seat, his head still bowed as he counted his shoelaces.

"Blimey, that was quick, Pete!" Sirius said with mild awe, watching as Peter collapsed on his stool, hyperventilating. He noticed Peter looked a very odd white colour. "Oi, Wormtail, you look like you've seen a—"

Sirius stopped, realising the next word 'ghost' would not match the sentence because seeing a ghost was a daily occurrence in Hogwarts. "Er, like you've seen Snape naked!" He corrected himself, applauding himself in his mind.

"Padfoot, why are you clapping?" James asked him, glancing from his potion.

Sirius looked down from his happy thoughts and realised he'd been physically clapping, instead of mentally.

"Crap, not again," Sirius said embarrassingly, folding his arms.

"Were you applauding yourself out loud again?" Remus asked knowingly.

"Har-sodding-har. You know me too well, Moony…Anyway," Sirius turned to Peter. "So Evans said…?"

Peter shook his head grimly.

"Bollocks," Sirius cursed, looking displeased. "Looks like it's my turn, then." He rubbed his hands together as if he were about to do a common household chore.

"Sirius," Remus spoke with caution. "Try and not make Lily more hysterically enraged. She has a knife," he warned.

"Yeah, yeah, like she'd use it," he laughed, skipping over to Lily's desk.

Remus watched and did a mental countdown of: "Three...two...one."

"JESUS!" Sirius screamed, wrapping his hands together in a ball as he looked at the place where they had been milliseconds before; a silver cutting knife was now speared into the desk. "You nearly IMPALED that into my HAND!"

"Oh," Lily smiled without concern. "I'm sorry. I didn't realise." She grabbed the knife, taking it out of the desk with ease. She tilted her head down and continued back to reading her Potions book. After thirty three seconds of Sirius' foot tapping, waiting for Lily to come out of her trance of reading, she finally snapped. She flinched, her wand knocking against her desk and causing a slight sparkling fire that singed Sirius' hair.

"Bloody hell," Sirius swore, blowing on a strand of his black tresses.

"What is this?" Lily demanded. "Some sort of recruiting act? Calling in the reinforcements one by one?" She glared at the boy who was the third to interrupt her potion making. "Can I have one hour without seeing a bloody Marauder!"

Sirius was slightly hurt at Lily's lack of welcoming. "All this attention on you! You should see it as privilege, you know."

"More like a nuisance," she muttered. "What exactly do you want, Sirius?"

He brightened with surprise, "Since when were we on the first name basis?"

"Since I had detention from McGonagall for apparently being racist! Now I have to be careful what I say!"

"Oh yeah!" Sirius laughed. "My surnames Black...and the colour black! What a weird coincidence. Haha. Ha."

"You're insane," Lily declared.

"We'll all do respect, Lily, but I'm not the one threatening with a knife."

"I am not threatening," she said menacingly, making another slam of her knife into her cutting board. "I am purely warning you. There is a difference." Sirius was about to interrupt but Lily had hushed him. "I would just like to, again, warn you, that whatever you say next is something I don't want to hear, then I can consequently slice something off." She cut the air with her knife, which made an impressive "whoosh" sound. "Understand?

"Er, you mean...no Sirius babies?"

"No Sirius babies," Lily confirmed.

He winced but nonetheless carried on bothering her with the risk of losing his manhood.

"Lily, you can't keep turning James down. It's like this," Sirius grabbed the knife from Lily's hands. "You are the knife," he said, then snatched a root from her ingredients, "And James is the root." He started to stab the root with the silver knife until only miniscule root crumbs were left.

"Will you stop destroying my ingredients!" Lily grabbed the knife back and blew the root crumbs into Sirius' face, blinding him. "YOU-you...ingredient-destroyer!" She shrieked.

"C'mon, Lily-silly-billy." Lily deeply frowned at the ridiculous nickname. "Just go out on one little date with James? Please?" Sirius pinched with his thumb and little finger to signify how 'little' going out with James was.

"How many times do I have to BLOODY SAY?" Lily yelled, causing Professor Slughorn to look over from his desk. "I'm fine, Professor!" She reassured him. "Just getting the creative, er, potion juices flowing!" She turned back to Sirius with an indignant look and said a simple but effective "no."

"But, Lily," he decided against using the nickname as it only got the girl more aggressive, "You have to go out with him! Do you have any idea what you're doing to him?"

"I'm not doing anything to him!" She said furiously.

Impishly, Sirius winked. "Exactly."

"Must you always talk like a sadistic pervert?"

"It's the only language I know, but back to the point: just go out with James! You're killing the guy!"

Lily couldn't believe the nonsensical words that came out of Sirius' mouth and went back to reading her Potions instructions. "He's not dying from some sort of life threatening disease, for Christ's sake."

"Yes he is!" Sirius said, grabbing her Potions book and slamming it to the floor, just to get Lily's attention. She tilted her head up with deadly malevolence. "You're the disease!" He pointed his finger at her as she frowned with confusion. "You're slowly killing him!"

Lily scoffed. "Now that is an exaggeration."

"Lemme go!"

Lily and Sirius turned to the sound of the shout which predictably came from James' desk, where he was currently trying to dunk his head in his boiling potion whilst being restrained by Remus and Peter. Once James finally calmed down and reassured his friends he was 'fine', he quickly snatched for his silver knife he'd used to cut his ingredients. Remus and James were now caught in a scrambling wrestling match on the floor as James tried to grab the knife and stab it in his eyes.

"Wow, sn example couldn't have come at a better time," Sirius commented. He turned his attention back to Lily who was staring over at James, eyes full of guilt and sadness.

"Every time you say 'no' to him he loses a part of himself."

Lily carried on staring.

"What harm can one measly 'yes' do?"

A lot.

"Okay, Sirius, I'll think about it." Lily eventually answered, slightly regretting the words that were coming out of her mouth.

Sirius was dumbfounded.

"Who would have thought, out of all the Marauders, you would be the one to make me consider," Lily said in amazement.

"Well," Sirius arrogantly laughed, "There wasn't much competition, was there."

"There was Remus," Lily reminded him.

"Shit yeah," Sirius realised, his mouth agape. "How the hell did this happen?"

Lily shrugged her shoulders and returned back to examining her potion, expecting Sirius to make his departure. She sighed when she looked up to see Sirius still there.

"Was there something else you wanted?"

"Actually, yes." Sirius sniffed Lily's sleeping potion which was the exact colour and perfectly mixed, as every other potion she had created. "Would you swap cauldrons with me? I twatted my potion. Exchange so ol'Sluggy can kiss my arse for a change."

"Hey," Lily said, insulted, "I don't particularly like my arse kissed by obese perverts, thank you very much."

"So swap?"

"No," Lily shook her head, "I like his suppers. They have the most gorgeous pumpkin pastries."

"Yes, I've heard," Sirius said. "Oh well. Food over thought, every time, I say."

"Most definitely," Lily agreed, then bent down to pick up her Potions book that'd been thrown selfishly to the floor. Feeling as if she had abandoned a loving pet, she gave the book a soothing stroke and then returned it back to her desk. As she brought out her wand out to carry on stirring her potion, she discovered-

"Gimme back my cauldron, Black!"

"Lily!" James called across the Gryffindor common room, chasing after the girl who was apparently deaf to his loud shouting.

It was the end of the classes and Lily had been pointedly avoiding him, including hurrying off to the girls bathroom to escape him when he wanted to talk to her. James told himself he wouldn't go back to Myrtle's bathroom after the whole I-tried-to-drown-myself-in-my-dirty-loo-water-sorrows. And also, Myrtle had took a particular shine to him and tried to snog him when he was emotionally upset over Lily. He most certainly did not want to be taken advantage by an ugly ghost - or any ghost, in fact.

"Lily, will you wait up," James said, managing to grab on to her arm as she was about to take a step up the common room stairs. Lily whipped round.

"Oh, it's you," she said in fake surprise, when of course she knew exactly who'd been calling her name and had been purposely ignoring them. "Are you aware that a stool is stuck to your arse?"

James sighed and slowly nodded. Sirius was most definitely in his bad books as he hadn't managed to detach the stool from his trousers and was going to change in to another pair, but had then spotted Lily in the common room.

"Long story," James said vaguely.

He pulled her over to a corner of the common room beside a table and fixed Lily with a questioning expression.

"I can't help but feel you've been avoiding me," James said.

"Me? Avoiding you?" Lily forced laugh which did not match the serious atmosphere. "I don't know what makes you say that! I have to go wash my hair now," she fibbed hurriedly and stepped back to hurry to the stairs leading to the dormitories. James, however, had other ideas, and grabbed her hand to stop her.

Lily's eyes widened. "You're holding my hand," she said tensely. "My hand. Your hand. Much holding happening."

"Sorry," James immediately apologized, dropping her hand in an instant as he recognised the tension. "I suppose you don't really want to be anywhere near me ever since yesterday when I...er, well, y'know...I-"

"Sexually molested me?"

"WHAT?" James spat in horror, turning red. "Well, er, I wouldn't say it was like that exactly..."

"Potter," Lily began fiercely, "You jumped on me. Licked my face," James cringed, "And then you...you k-kissed me." She flushed an unimaginable red and avoided James' eye contact.

"Yeah," he ran a hand through his hair in humiliation. "I would just like to mention that if my kissing standards were...er, sloppy? Then they aren't normally that bad."

Lily gave him a ridiculous look. "After everything that happened yesterday, you're worried that your kissing standards were sloppy?"

"I'm really, really sorry about that. I'm sorry about lying and saying I was Remus before because that was just a Complete Twat Moment. It's just, uh, you make me so nervous, and I er, get so tongue-tied. And nonsensical...and er, illogical...and uh, other words with the definition of insane-"

"Hysterical?" Lily suggested.

"Yeah, sure," James pointed a finger, "See, you're amazing! You can think of the perfect word just like that. And I am a twat and I'm sorry. Especially about the thing yesterday. It was a stupid mistake-"

"Mistake?" Lily echoed, mouth tilting downwards. "You think it was a...mistake?"

James was very confused. Looking at Lily, he could somehow recognise the feelings of hurt and disappointment at his words of saying Whisker's kiss was an error.

"Not if you don't want it to be," James murmured, bewildered at how Lily's mind worked.

She looked away, obviously caught on the spot and flustered. "I dunno," she shrugged her shoulders.

"Look, Lily, you know how I feel about you. Just give me a chance," he pleaded. "Just let me take you on one date so I can show you I'm not really an insensitive prick."

Lily stared on in silence.

"You're going to say 'no' again, aren't you?" James assumed, annoyed. "Well, I won't give up!" He said stubbornly. "I won't give up on you. I'll keep asking you again and again. Like those annoying kids in those Muggle cars, and also Sirius, who keep asking "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" in those whiny voices-"

"Okay."

"-Until their parents, or in Sirius' case, me, are really pissed off, and shout at them to shut the hell up and—w-what?" James broke off, realising what Lily had answered.

"Okay," she said louder, face unreadable.

"Okay what? Okay you're going to…massacre me?" he asked in fear.

"You must be acting because you cannot be this clueless," Lily sighed. "Okay I will go on a date with you."

James narrowed his eyes. "Are you taking the piss?"

"If you ask me one more time if I am joking, I will most certainly be taking the piss," Lily warned him. "When will the date be?" James was still frozen with shock and was contemplating whether he had been cursed with a 'Stupefy' spell. "Please stop gaping at me," she said feebly.

He picked his jaw up from the floor, pinched each arm and finally realised that this wasn't a dream - besides, his dreams involving Lily included a lot less clothing and a lot less talking.

"There's a Hogsmeade trip this Saturday," he remembered.

Lily nodded coyly. "Okay."

"O-kay," James echoed, in a way a person says 'okay' when they are very, very confused. He wondered at which point of the conversation Lily had lost her mind.

"Well, I better get going," she interrupted the silence.

"Oh, right, yes." James realized he should probably do something to signify his goodbye and her departure - a goodbye hug, maybe? Or how about a goodbye kiss to make up for the sloppy one that Whiskers did?

Again, James seized her hand.

"You're holding my hand again," Lily stated, trembling. "My hand. Your hand. Much holding happening."

Before James had time to comprehend what he was doing, he started shaking her hand, as if he were at some sort of business meeting. Lily opened her mouth in confusion as she watched him shake her hand eagerly and with much enthusiasm.

"So...I'll see you on our date...that's happening...between you...and me? Yes..." He dropped Lily's hand finally, realising it'd been at least three minutes of the handshaking and Lily was loosing the blood circulation in her fingers.

"Right, er, bye then...James." She smiled in embarrassment and hurried up the common room stairs two at a time.

James was funnily enough not thinking about the fact that Lily had called him by his first name for the first time, but how much teasing he was going to get from Sirius for shaking a girl's hand, as if he were getting votes for an election.

He sat back on his stool, which he thanked gratefully was stuck to his backside, as he felt dizzy with Lily-ness.

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Hi again!!!!!!! Yes, i did have to finis this chapter and i did... Btw can you tell if you like this?-

One day i'll get a chance,

To spread my wings and dance,

My own kind of romance...

One day i'll get to see,

What the future holds for me,

And i will be set free...

Oh and this too-

Dont you worry cuz everything, is gonna be alright.

Every tunnel ends with a bright little light.

We will find out whats wrong, and what is true...

And you know... I'll be here for you...

I know its crappy.... :/ 

<3 you!

<3 Y