hello guys! i am sorry for not updating. but i was not keeping up good with health and studies is also a major factor. i am trying my best to write daily but thoda thoda hi likh pati hu.

and yeah now we have 5k readers. thankyou to every one. please aise hi share vote aur comment karte raho. isse bohot motivation milta hai.

now not wasting much time lets start

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its been days and as sid said he was being utmost professional with sana. they didn't even exchange  formal hi, hello or greetings. he just used to assign her work without looking at her. it was very rare now that he looked at her and all these thing were making sana sad. everytime she felt hurt by his behaviour she used to make herself understand that this was only what she wanted and also that she deserved this cold behavior after hurting him. but all these were taking a toll on her. she could not focus on work, neither in office nor in college. 

today's day also passed like that. they didn't talk. sid remained nonchalant towards her. the office hours got over and she would finally go home and sleep. peace was all she wanted but fate has some other plans for her. she got a call from her mother to come back home soon after her work finishes. she could feel that something was not right. there was a change in her mother's voice so she packed her stuff and left for home.

 she reached her home and saw her mother in the living area visibly tensed.

"mumma kya hua. apne aise ku bulaya aur itne tense kyu ho?" she asked immediately sitting next to her.

"wohh.."

"bolo na" she held her mother's hand.

"ajj tere papa ka phone aya tha." mumma said listening to which sana's blood boiled. she closed her eyes and fisted her hand to control her anger.

"vo mere kuch nhi hai. aur kyu phone kar rahe hai ab. aur kya chahiye unhe." sana  uttered in extreme anger.

"baccha shant hoja plz. pehele meri poori bat to sun le. he is sorry for what he did. he realised that what he did was wrong. he wants us to be back."

"what?"

"bachha.."

"nahi ek second. wants us to be back matlab. aur sorry bolne se sab theek ho jata hai. agar ho jata hai to theek hai mai jakar unhe char thappad laga deti hu aur fir sorry bol dungi. chalega na" sana said in extreme anger.

"shehnaaz, tameez bhool gayi hai. papa hai vo tere." mumma scoled.

''kuch nhii lagte vo mere." sana yelled getting up from where she sat and was now pacing in living area in anger. "aur na hi kabhi lagenege. aur ek second unhone kaha to kaha, apne kya jawab diya." she asked looking at her mother.

"maine unhe kaha ki mai sochungi." mumma mumbled looking away.

"sochungi. sochne wala hai kch isme. bhool gayi kya kiya unhone aur kya kya kaha. sachme unhe maaf karke unke pas jana hai apko." sana asked utterly shocked listening to her mother.

"sana baccha meri bat sun. vo sach mein sharminda hai. mai to bas.."

"voh insan kabhi nhi badal sakta. sab natak hai." sana said looking away.

"nahi baccha. aisa nhi hai. ek bar unse bat karke dekh, tu bhi samajh jayegi." mumma said holding sana's hand but she pulled her hand back and moved 2 steps back listening to her mother.

"mujhe nahi samajhna. nahi samajhna. aur na hi bat karni. app bhi nhi karengi. plz we had enough of him, hume unki zaroorat nahi hai." sana said and went towards her room.

"hume zaroorat hai. humesha rahegi. father plays a very important part of life baccha. aur mujhe bhi hai zaroorat, zindgi akele nhhi kati hai baccha." mumma said hoping sana would understand.

"isi wajah se inte salo se jhel rahi hai na us insan ko. aur jab ab khulke bina kisike rok tok ke zindgi jeene ka mauka mil raha hai to nhi apko unki zaroorat hai. well apki marzi hai vaise bhi apne kaunsa kabhi meri bat suni hai. but ek bat bohot acche se smajh lijiye mujhe unki koi zaroorat nhi hai aur na hi kabhi hogi. mai shakal bhi nahi dekhna chahti unki. apko jo karna hai kariye mujhe is bare mein age se bat karne ki zaroorat nahi hai." sana said and went inside the room and shut the door behind with a thud. 

sana sat on the bed, eyes closed trying to absorb everything happening around her. she was shocked, angry, scared and disappointed all at one point. she didn't understand why her mother wants to go back in hell. does she not care about herself and what about her children. why she wants them to suffer again. 

her chain of thoughts were broken by the knock on the door. it was her brother.

"kya hain" sana said in harsh tone.

"woh.."

"bolega kuch tu."

"bhahar papa aur bua ayein hai."

"kya..and don't call him that." sana said pointing a finger at him. now her anger was on different level. she dashed out of the room and saw them sitting in the living area.

"what the hell are they doing here?" she asked her mother pointing towards the unwanted guests.

"baat karne aye hain." her bua said. 

"apse poocha maine. nahi na toh chup rahiye please." sana said in anger.

"shehnaaz do thappad lagenege mooh pe. tameez naam ki cheez nhi hai is ladki mein." her father yelled getting up and so her bua.

"haan nahi hai mere andar tameez khush. ab jaiye yahan se hume kuch baat nhi karni." sana said pointing towards the door.

"sana baccha shant hoja please. ek baar bat to sunle unki. mere lie please." her mom pleaded to calm her down. sana stared at her with ARE-YOU-FOR-REAL wala look.

"boliye" she said to her father crossing her arms across her chest.

"pehele to na tameez se bat kar mere sath. ek chamat lagega na kan ke neeche to akad thikane aa jayegi." her father said in threatening tone.

"apse aur koi umeed bhi nhi hai mujhe. ab boliye kyuki mere pas bohot kaam hai karne ke lie. i don't waste my time." 

her father launched towards her in anger but was held by her bua.

"dekho jo bhi hua hai bohot hi unfortunate tha. but aise rishte nhi khatam kiye jate hai. tere papa ne jo kiya uska pachtava hai use. ab bas bohot hua. ghar vapas chalo sab. itti itti si baton pe ghar aur parivar nahi toda jata hai." her bua said.

"sabse peheli bat to ye mere papa hai nahi. aur dusri bat jisko ap itti si bat kehe rahi hai agar vo apki ya apki beti ke sath hua hota na tab pata chalta. so get this very clear in your head that we are not coming back. understood." sana seethed. but this irked her bua. how could she say like that about her family. 

"sana baccha meri bat sun. galti insan se hi hoti hai. maaf karne vala insan sabse bada hota hai. unhe pachtava hai. tu unki.." her mother tried to convince her but sana cut her in between.

"ap apna man bana chuki hai na ki apko is insan ke pas vapas jana hai. sab bhool gayi hai app. ek sorry aur sab pain sab insut sab kahatm right. apko koi farak nahi padta ki main kya chahti hu ya mai comfortable hoon ki nahi. bas yeh hi insan sahi lagta hai apko." sana said in much calmer tone but hurt was very visible in her voice.

"tu kyun nahi chahti ki sab vapas se theek ho jaye, haan" her bua asked in bitter tone.

"okay there, enough of you now. main apni mummy se bat kar rahi hu. to shanti okay." sana said pointing a finger at her.

"ajj tak itni batameez ladki nahi dekhi maine. apne se bado se bat karne ki tameez nahi hai. aise tever sse ghar sirf toote hai aur ho bhii raha hai. apni hi maa ka ghar todne mein lagi hai. patani kya samajhti hai apne app ko." her bua said bitterly. but this felt like someone stabbed in sana's heart. she was expecting her mother to say something that whatever she was doing she was only trying to give justice to her mother. but when nothing came she lost hope and she knew that she had to fight herself only.

"accha hai na apke ghar main nahi hai aise ladkiya. app to khush ho na to bas fir. muh band rakho apna kyuki mujhe koi farak nhi padta app mere bare mein kya sochte ho. got  it." sana said and turned towards her mom.

"last time i am asking app kya chahate ho. as much as i hate it but i can't tolerate this man and for the fact any person of his family so chose, me or him." sana said in finality but this was a bomb on her mother. how could she chose between her child and husband. but before she could say anything her bua interrupted once more.

"ek min kahin aisa to nahi ki apna chakkar chupane ke lie tu vapas nahi ana chahti kyuki teri maa to tujhe kuch keheti nahi hai." bua sai and everyone looked at her with shock.

"kya aise kya dekh are ho sab. sahi to kehe rahi hu. chal to raha hai iska chakkar. iske boss ke sath. ghar chodne ata hai, poore poore din uske sath ghoomti hai, office khatam hone ke bad bhi office mei rukna. aur mai tabhi sochu koi degree nai koi qualification nahi fir bhi company ke head ki secretory, aise kaise job mili. paisa hai ab iske pas ameer ladke ko fasaya jo hai tevar to badlenge na." bua said bitterly.

it took few minutes for sana to registered the allegations thrown on her. she looked at her mother that she will say something but nothing came. she didn't even looked surprised like any mother whose daughter's character has been questioned. did she also believed in what her bua said, that she got the job because she had an affair with her boss. she then looked at the person who apparently is her father, well he had a slight disgusting looking an his face as if he was ashamed of her. she wanted to defend herself, she wanted to scream and tell that whatever her bua was saying was wrong. she opened her mouth but nothing came. this was too much to bear. she took few steps back. her mother tried to hold her but she gestured her to stop. she looked at her and finally spoke.

"mil gaya mujhe mera jawab. app jaiye aur rahiye apne parivar ke sath. inke lie to pehele hi mar gai thi ab apke lie bhi mar gayi. jab tak mai vapas auu chale jayiyega agar app yahan hue jab main ayii to i swear main kabhi vapas nahi aungi dobara. i promise you that. and also i hate you too now." sana said in low voice. her voice shook. she was hurt beyond repair. she went towards the house when her father held her hand to stop her.

"kahan ja rahi hai. time dekha hai. chup chap ghar par baith. bags pack kar. bohot ho gaya natak bas ab ghar chal" there was an edge of concern in his voice but it meant nothing because she was broken now completely.

"apko kya farak padta hai. kis hak se rok rahe ho. apko jo chahiye vo mil gaya na to bas yeh fikar karne ka natak band karo" she said freeing her hand from his grip and again walked towards the door. 

"baap hu terra is hak se rok raha hu"

"mera koi nahi hai. anath hu mai. mere maa baap ke lie mar gayi hu main." she said in monotone she didn't have any emotions like a body without soul. saying so she left the house and when they followed her she threatened them to kill herself if anybody followed her.

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from now few chapters donot have any romance. this is important as the reason to why sana is repelent towards love and emotions had to be shown. thode sad honge updates but impact bhi ayega. 

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