Chapter 5
Maria's P.O.V:
After leaving Thomas and John downstairs, Eliza and I walked back to our apartment, me with Susan in my arms.
"I'll leave her on her crib," Eliza said after entering the house, so I handed her before walking to our room.
I really want to speak with Eliza after the little conversation she had with Thomas about she dealing with "this kind of loss". What does even that mean?
I sighed as I took my clothes and put them in the closet since I only use this dress today and it's still clean. I put my black onesie on and crawled into the bed. A couple of minutes later Eliza walked in, change into her white onesie (we bought them back when I was still pregnant) and crawled into the bed, not facing me.
I sighed and starts to count sheep to sleep trying to concentrate on the numbers, slowly falling asleep.
//Timeskip//
I woke up cold sweating with the sound of a thunder. Fortunately, both Susan and Eliza are heavy sleepers.
I need to check on Alex, he probably needs someone right now I stood up and ran to put my red converse on. I walked to the front door when the realization hits me. Wait... Alex's not here... He's not in the city... He's nowhere...
"He's gone..." I murmured sitting on the couch. I looked at the digital clock on the wall. 3:11 a.m. I couldn't sleep, even when I want to. My head hurts and I want to cry but I won't because it's like pretty late.
I rest my head against the sofa, look at the ceiling and pull my legs to my chest, hugging them. I wanted to sleep so badly, so I just closed my eyes and try to sleep.
However, I couldn't. Instead, I started to remember what happened after Alex and I found out he's expecting.
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Alex was sobbing on the couch, hugging his knees and with his head between them after an hour of crying. I was preparing a cake and tea for calming him as I try to think in a way to help besides feeding him. I'm not a psychologist, I have basic concepts thanks to Peggy.
After a couple of minutes, I went out with two cups of tea, with a little bit of sugar on mine.
"Hey, the cake is almost done" I sit next to him and hand him the cup. "You need to re-hydrate yourself"
He grabs the cup and sipped the tea before putting it on the table and hug his knees again but not sobbing. I left my cup on the table too and look at him. He moved his head so his head was now over his knees.
"Thanks, for the tea and the cake..." Alex mumbled.
"It's really nothing, you need to eat so you won't pass out like my mom used to say"
Alex sighed and grabbed his cup again, drinking it with short sips each time until the cup was empty. After that, he left it on the table and curled into a blanket burrito, burying his face in the pillows.
I sighed and waited until the cake was ready, with the sound of the rain and the tv as background. I hear Alex breathing, so maybe he's still awake or close to falling asleep.
A couple of minutes passed and I heard the oven. My cake was ready. I walked to the kitchen and take it out of the oven. I waited to cool down and start decoring it. My favorite part.
I'm not a good chef, but my desserts are pretty good.
I decorated the chocolate cake with some wiped cream and strawberries. I finished decorating it and I cut two pieces and put them on plates.
Alex walked into the kitchen and grabbed a glass, filled with water and chunks it. I look at him as he sat down on the island and grabbed one of the plates and start to eat the cake furiously but also with tears in his eyes.
"Hey, Alex?" I asked sitting next to him.
"It tastes good..." he answers.
"That's not what I wanted to ask but thanks", I replied. "I wanted to ask... how do you feel?"
"Well, I'm expecting and I don't have a fucking idea of what I'm going to do, what do you think?" He said in a really harsh tone.
I furrowed my eyebrows and he frowned. "I'm sorry... it's just-"
"You don't have to explain to me your mood swings, been there done that" I joked. I saw a little smile on his face that slowly fades. "Hey, don't worry. Everything is gonna be fine"
"What happens if not?" Alex hugged himself. "Wh-what if th-they found out and don't want me anymore? I don't even know if they want to have kids! They'll probably hate me if I tell me and-"
"Hey, Alex, chill man!" I cut him. "Breath... we don't want to stress you more than you already are..."
Alex nodded and starts with his takes breathing exercises. After five minutes or so, he finally speaks again. "You-you're right... I need to calm down and think in a plan"
"Ok, I'm not an expert, but maybe if I ask you some questions that may help you work would help" I proposed
"Sounds good to me... Yeah, let's do that"Alex grabbed the other plate of cake and starts to eat it.
"Okay, uhm..." I started seeking for good questions in my mind. "Have you ever wanted or want to have kids?"
"Yes, I guess... I mean, I like the idea of having kids, but I don't know if I would be a good father or... mother..."
I know that look, he's feeling self-conscious again. I need to change the subject. "Well... you always take good care of Susan and Georges when we're busy, so I suppose you qualify as a good father"
He smiles shyly and looks down again.
"Ok, next question. Who do you think is the father?"
He looked at the ceiling. "I-I don't know... I think it's John, but I'm not sure... We had quite an... interesting.. night that day..." He smiled awkwardly.
I giggled. "Okay, okay, I don't need to know that kind of information. I'm not Peggy." I joked and he let go a chuckle. He followed me and we start laughing for a couple of seconds. After he stopped laughing I look him in the eye.
"Alex..." I furrowed my eyebrows. "Do you want to keep it?"
He looked down at the carpet, moving his eyes like he was rethinking all the choices and possibilities. I stand up to get the drugstore's bag. A couple of minutes passed before Alex finally looks at me and gave me his answer.
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I jumped up as I remembered the answer. How could I be so dumb?
I hear the rain against the window as I walked at it. I don't even know what time it is, or even if it is a good idea, but I opened and ran downstairs with the rain hitting me in the face and soaks me.
I slowly played with the lock in the guy's window until is unlock. I ran to their bathroom and started to search for the drugstore's bag.
It's just a filler chapter. And I think it's a little short.
Anyways, I'm gonna start the next.
See ya!
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