Neil

As I took in the surrounding, sucked a deep breath before I reached the entrance gate and the concierge yanked open the see through glass-door with a welcoming smile and ask me politely if I have the booking. I nodded him yes on my way to the reception. There's a beautiful girl in charge at the reception desk greeted me with that same welcoming smile. And not wasting a second more there I uttered the name there should be a booking 'Neela Roy'. Or I would have given Aunty a call.

And next moment I'm following a teenage, charming waiter boy who usurped me to the elevator plastering a beaming face.

Meanwhile on my way I blearily scanned the place. At this hour the cafeteria is suffice crowded, mostly are couple and few small amount of friends group occupied the table here and there.

As soon as we made our way out of the elevator I spotted the person I have a meeting with. The schmancy terrace part has quite scanty sitting arrangements compare to the rest. The cool breeze and the sunset view is cherry on the cake. Awestrucking.

I silently advanced to her table carrying my unnerving form, she was looking at the sunset faraway with that melancholy of a gaze caused my stomach dropped, My chest clenched at the sight.

A glass of cold coffee she is twirling absent-mindedly in her hold, is half empty with a straw into it.
She didn't acknowledge my steps moving closer to her and to get her attention I hemmed before that waiter boy would call her. Her hands left the glass with a small startle and she looked up. Our eyes met. I tried to smile but God knows how I looked at the moment, even I'm not convinced that if I smiled.

The waiter left being assured that I'm the right person. Big place big security.

Watching the waiter walked away with a lively smile Neela Aunty broke the silence. "I have already gave them your name. Didn't they ask you?" She shuffled awkwardly  in her seat.

Her small voice battling to stay calm, her gloomy gaze was enough for me to die and be reincarnated from the apprehension I'm going through.

"They didn't" I answered, again tried offer a smile. Probably this time I succeeded a tad. I stared at her she heaved a sigh, her gaze swept around anywhere, then came back to me. She tried to purse her lips in a smile but failed just like I did previously. I swallowed then my eyes narrowed at her.

What the hell is she up to?

All my anxiety coming back. My hands are growing clammy on the table I have kept them folded together in a very uncomfortable way. Her gaze dropped to my hands and her action next made me winched on my seat and my heart leaped to my throat when reaching across the table she placed her hands over mine.

"I'm a very bad mother I know Neil. But I won't be able to see my Son in trouble" unceremoniously she let her mind out. The lady I knew her since my childhood suddenly appeared to me someone I hardly recognising at the moment. She looked at me with so much of hope, plead in her eyes and they welling up. Left me numb. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I found myself kind of loss of words. I wasn't actually prepared for this Neela Aunty. I didn't know how to response.

Whoa! I didn't foreseen her to be this blunt. I was prepared for the berating I'll be getting by her asking me to leave her daughter, or something much ruder than this as expected, but a vulnerable, beseeching mother, never. My heart squeezed at the sight.

"You are no less than a Son to me Neil" she took a deep breath resumed before she smile painfully.
"You were five then, when I first saw you. Or I should say first met you. A cute, little reserved kid when I first saw you Neil. Remember you were playing with your little bat and ball in that backward garden. Sweta took me to meet her elder son. Avni had just completed a year.
Avni was in my arms, let out a loud cheerful shriek watching you playing as soon as carrying her I walked to the back foyer. My baby shook her little chubby hands calling you to her and when by her giggle your attention dropped to Avni. You stared at her for few seconds with your those big beautiful eyes I have ever seen a kid like you. I instantly fallen in love with you" She let out a small laugh. My chest ached.

"Then leaving those stuffs off your hold you reached to me...and Avi...."

"Neela Aunty I have heard it several times...Mom told me...." Somehow gaining all my speaking strength I disrupted her, my chest dragged a sigh. I shook my head few times, deeply inhaled. She abruptly stopped, her eyes hurtful by my curtly put off her.
Still I have no idea about what she is trying to convey.

And then she finally dropped the bomb causing my gut almost plummeted on the ground. Great.

"I haven't gave birth to Avni Neil. I'm not her biological mother" her eyes quivering and an involuntary shiver ran down my spine in spite of knowing this stealthy story already.

Yes god damn yes I know it. Not all of it but I have the truth.

All these years my brain has absolutely erased this piece of information I have gained that night. When Avni got hospitalized due to her heavy bleeding getting unconscious in School, I was the one accompanied her in ambulance taking her to the cure center. And also the same day I have first realised my heart has grown some strong feelings for her I have ever had for any gal before I have came across that close unlike her.

"Do she has any family history as such?" the doctor asked getting out of the ward they put Avni admitted in. And being all tensed my eager, anticipating glances waiting for the reply her Mom and Dad would say but my Mom interrupted my attention towing towards her saying me to leave for home.
We are there few seats away so I couldn't follow what exactly Reyaansh Uncle my Dad and Neela Aunty talked to the doctor in a low voice and his face changed from those professional physician, to a real concerned person strangely.

Sitting there I got effing restless by my mother's continuous pestering me why it necessary for me to go home and wait for them there.... This a gyne ward, a young boy not supposed to stay here, other patients could feel awkward from my presence and all bullshit she was putting into my brain with her nonstop low voice blabbering. No way I'm going home without knowing my Avni is doing well_My heart screamed.

Yet being a tenager I had to obey my elders and that's why I had to  return. Only the difference was Bebe accompanied me all the way back home along with our driver Uncle in car.

Subsequently the day turned no less worst when later I found that truth related to Avni.

That exhausted day, all came back home around 10pm. And after Mom, Dad freshen up and we gathered for the dinner. They said Doc has informed that they would keep Avni under observation for next few days. But later it turned out a couple of weeks as Avni had released lot of blood and she went through that girly thing more than a week. My Poor baby.

I used to visit her everyday and bring her flowers, her fav books, her fav food, but she would in lot of pain. I felt like crying watching her squashing her head most of the time in pillow clutching her lower abdomen in so much pain. She looked so pale, fragile due to not able to eat her meal in adequate quality, those saltless food her gynecologist prescribed to intake her for a month. Aravi and Aman used to try make her giggle with their usual banters. And I brush her hair silently praying to God to give me instead all her pain.

"I guess I already know this engraved true about your daughter. But I'm not getting the point what made you risk it, reveal such secret to me all of a sudden" purposely I enunciated those words your daughter because it is the truth Neela is Avni's mother but no one else.

She loves Avni, knows every nerves of her daughter more that any one does, those hidden pain when Avni tries her most not to palpitate others, instead keep everything inside her, which sometimes biological mothers very much fails to notice. But Neela her mother who adopted her, never fails seeing her heart through those glasses she pushed over her nose whenever she succeeded others making fool of with her faux laughter or those stupid impassive expressions she masked up on her face.

"Neil!" My daze broke when her hands came over mine for the second time with much pressure than before. Her awaited gaze over me to continue. Suddenly I found it's hard to breathe. The place is not at all nice. I'm already hating the people around, the ambience, the food which I haven't ordered yet nor have any plan to. I'm in utter distaste with this spot.

"I have heard yours and mom's chat over call that night. Unintentionally" my voice came out hesitant, glance uneasy, while she frowned having difficulties to understand this new info I'm revealing to her.

Yes I had eavesdropped.

At the same time Me and Mom both pulled the receiver close to our ear to answer the call at the second ring when our parallel landlines had oddly rang blowing the house the next day around late evening.

In that single call everything was clear, Avni is their adopted child. She didn't talk about the details but by her words it was as transparent as water that my Avni is not their biological child. It's not exactly rocket science need to my fifteen years self to not miss that part that_ there something happened in London they used to live that country. And they had to leave that place after having the adoption process. This was what I  reckoned with the entire conversation between Neela Aunty and my Mom.

I would have put the receiver down from my end if  Neela Aunty hasn't wept and mentioned that what if they took Avu away me?

Neela Aunty just broke down and my mom said she is coming to her before she hurriedly put the receiver down. And my heart terribly beaten by those words she said mentioning about Avi. Who will come and take her away me? None can, I haven't told her yet what I feel for her. How could she leave me? No way I would let her go anywhere. My head messed up in apprehension. I felt like having heartache that moment.

And wasting not a single minute standing there and pondering over I immediately got out of my room and followed all the way my Mom, who has no idea about someone followed her. I couldn't restrain my  curious head.

They were seated in hall and I only could get through their conversation clear the fact that Avni's real mother is very much worried about her daughter ailing and she wants to meet her soon. Holding my Mom's both hands Neela Aunty broke in copious sob and without their knowledge standing there outside my heart dropped at the information. I got frozen, almost paralysed not able to believe on what I heard.

It felt like ages after I gained back my sense off my squabble, terribly baffled head and next second I strode back home.
Painting I locked myself in my room and that night I didn't come out even for dinner. Because by then I have lost all my appetite freaking over the fact what if there is a chance someone can take away the girl, my childhood pal for whom I have lately found out a different kind of feeling. Which is beyond jubilant to my heart recently.

"Neil!" Her small voice startled me off of my paced out stance one more time and I looked at our hands then back at Aunty.

"I loved her the day when I knew she is adopted. then again I loved her more when I have got to know she has some gynecological issues; those birth related. I love her god knows since when, but I know Neil could never let his Avni go, nor would his life be the same without her. So please I request you Mrs. Roy do not think of convincing me anything or you would loose me as your son. I have already give it a thousands thought and trust me everytime I have come up picturing myself alone my entire life"

"You knew it the whole time?" A perplexed frown grew over her forehead creasing her brows together incredulously.

"Yes I was" I sighed answered with a straight face not much effected by her reaction. I know what she is going to reason out now. And I was right.

"But Neil your Mom. She has her reason. And I belief she isn't at fault whatsoever"

"One day you will be all gone. You, Mom, Dad, Bebe, Reyansh Uncle, no one would be forever by our side but my broken heart and my girl with another person married, unhappy. Would you people be happy seeing us in that state? If yes then I have nothing to say on this"

I know I have been always good with words, although my words hold the truth. And as a result is, Neela Aunty went speechless.

"Aman can fulfill my mom's wish having her grandchildren so please Neela Aunty stop voicing out my Mom"  my tone laced with repugnance. I'm seriously exhausted with these same chat over and over again every event.

"Neil please try understand" she begged abruptly wiping off her cheeks those wet in tears. I looked away that visage before my heart clench at the sight. This is not the time to get weak Neil. There is a stringent voice in my head hissed.

"There is nothing to understand. And why you are telling me all her details which you shouldn't have at the first place yourself!" It got her flinched my accusative tone, but I continued.

"so that I step back? Like seriously Aunty! you think of me that meek, a coward? You have really surprised me big time Aunty." I let out a derisive scoff. It's getting hard for me to digest how could she think of my feelings for Avni is this frail? My voice was somewhat little louder.
Realising flicked a glance around the space discreetly being slightly mortified by my own little act. Thank god no one is giving any attention to us. I inhaled a breath of relief my chest full.

Then inadvertently my gaze fell at something rather someone and promptly next second I felt my hearing ability got blurred not able to keep my attention on what did Aunty gab in reply to my aggrieved comments.

"Blech! What the fuck that Satan of a man is doing here?" That's how I cursed under my breath clenching my jaws painfully hard when my gaze veered over the space downward and right then I spotted a particular person standing there leaning to the fence downstairs and brazenly flirting with a girl.

A bitterness spread over me when my eyes zoomed at him. Ergo at that very second indeed to worst of my luck our gaze collided with eachother woefully.

How much I wish I could wipe off that blood boiling smirk away that Judas visage, watching me.

~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you so much for Reading.

Love MoN ❤️