KARSON THOUGHT it would only be that one instance but no. Nowi really was acting weird. Matapos nitong ipagdamot ang pullover, parang lalo itong kinabahan.

        Kinagabihan, kaunti lang ang mga lumabas na alitaptap. Ang sabi ni Tito Japs, gano'n daw talaga minsan. May season din daw kasi ang mga insekto tulad ng pagsibol ng strawberries.

        Eyeing Nowi suspiciously, Karson entered the guest room. Tapos na siyang maghilamos nang makatanggap siya ng notification mula sa boyfriend. It wasn't related to why he was acting all jumpy and guilty. Still, she didn't ask him outright. Nagdesisyon siyang hintayin na ito mismo ang magsabi.

        They exchanged messages for more than an hour. Kung saan-saan napunta ang usapan nila. They talked about Mon and Jai who greeted Nowi privately. Naligaw na rin sila sa pakikipag-bonding ng mga tatay nito sa kanya.

        Wala pa rin.

        With her patience running thin, Karson sighed.

        "By the way," she typed.

        She was in the middle of thinking of a good way to broach the subject when she received another message from Nowi.

        "I've been meaning to give you something pala."

        Nakagat niya ang pang-ibabang labi. Mukhang tama ang desisyon niyang hintayin si Nowi.

        Following his request, Karson left her door unlocked. She felt a mix of emotions as she sat on the bed. Mukhang may regalo lang naman kasing ibibigay si Nowi. Isa pa, napakakaswal ng pagbitiw nito ng request sa kanya.

        Mariing napapikit si Karson nang makarinig ng tatlong magkakasunod na katok. They were soft knocks. Doon pa lang ay alam na niyang si Nowi iyon, hindi pa man umaawang ang nakabukas namang pinto.

        "Love?" Nowi asked quietly.

        "Bakit?"

        Tuluyan nitong pinihit at binuksan ang pinto. "I'm sorry, it took me a few minutes. I was looking for cake, then I realized that Nat ate the leftover nga pala," nangingiting paliwanag nito. "Are you sleepy na ba?"

        Karson shook her head.

        "Would you maybe want to go to the beach?" Napalabi ito nang maningkit ang mga mata niya. "There were only a few alitaptaps kasi kanina, right? I don't know about you but I was a bit disappointed. There's usually more kasi at this time of the year."

        She shrugged. "Baka dahil sa climate change," simple niyang sabi. Nagmamadali niyang ipinatong sa sando ang oversized polo ni Nowi. He lent it to her the night before. Iyon din ang ipinangibabaw niya sa swimsuit niya noong lumangoy sila. "Hindi naman tayo magsu-swimming, 'no?"

        "No, it's high tide na, e. The water's really cold din."

        Despite having no idea what Nowi's gift could possibly be, Karson packed her essentials. Isinilid niya sa tote bag ang phone, wallet, at power bank niya. Sinuksok din niya roon ang disposable camera'ng ginawa niyang temporary gift sa boyfriend.

        The short trip to the beach was filled with comfortable silence. Sa loob ng kotse, paminsan-minsang inabot at hinalikan ni Nowi ang kaliwang kamay ni Karson. He would affectionately squeeze her thigh, too.

        That didn't slow down Karson's racing thoughts, though. Sadyang hindi lang niya mapigilan ang isip niya, kahit ano pang gawing pagpapakalma ni Nowi.

        It took them less than 20 minutes to reach the sea by car.

        Agad na naglatag ng kumot si Nowi sa buhangin. Matapos nilang makasalampak nang maayos, binuksan na nito ang bitbit na thermos. He improvised the lid as a cup and poured the liquid for her. Hinipan din nito ang baso bago iabot kay Karson. It was coffee, much to her surprise.

        "Decaf ba 'to?" nakatawa niyang tanong. "Kung wala ka pang balak matulog pagbalik natin, 'wag mo 'kong idamay."

        Nowi took the cup from her. "I kind of wanted to watch the sunrise," nakangiti nitong pag-amin at saka, sumimsim. "I know I said this countless times na, but thank you for coming here."

        "Uulitin ko lang din 'yong sinabi ko sa 'yo." She grinned. "You're welcome."

        The sea looked and felt unforgiving. If it wasn't for the streetlamps a few feet away, it would have appeared more daunting. Karson hugged her knees. Ramdam niya ang pagtitig sa kanya ng boyfriend. Uminit tuloy ang mga pisngi niya. Muli niya itong nilingon nang marinig niya itong bumuga ng hangin. "Bakit?"

        "Nothing. I was just looking at you."

        "I know," nangingiti niyang sabi. "Kaya nga kita tinanong kung bakit, ha-ha. 'Di ka pa rin ba makapaniwala na nandito ako? Last day na natin bukas dito, 'di ka pa rin makapaniwala?"

        Nowi chuckled. "No, it's not that naman, Babe." Napamaang ito, at saka saglit na tumahimik. He looked like he was in his head again, carefully treading for the proper word to say. "It's not that I still can't believe you're here. It's something else."

        Concern quickly flashed in Karson's eyes. Hindi man niya ipinahalata sa boyfriend, halos buong araw siyang nag-alala rito. Annual tradition na raw kasi ng pamilya nito ang pagsi-celebrate sa garden. Knowing of his bad experiences in the same garden, Karson wasn't sure if Nowi liked the tradition in the first place.

        "You know you can just tell your dads, right? Maiintindihan naman nila kung sasabihin mong hindi ka 100 percent onboard sa yearly mong birthday lunch."

        Slowly, he broke into a small smile. "You were thinking of that ba the whole day?"

        Napabuga siya ng hangin. "S'yempre ayokong magsabi ng something na ano kasi nga, tradition niyo na 'yon. It wasn't my place to say anything but yes, kanina ko pa iniisip. Alam ko rin kasing may pagka-people pleaser ka. You wouldn't have said anything, kahit ikaw na 'yong nalalagay sa alanganin."

        Her little monologue was met by silence. Nakagat niya ang pang-ibabang labi. Malayo kasi ang tingin ni Nowi. She couldn't read him. The crashing waves were all she could hear for minutes.

        "Ah, fuck."

        Mabilis siyang napatingin sa katabi. "Ha?"

        "I wasn't sure how I was going to do this but uhm. . ." Nowi cleared his throat. Saglit itong nagpamulsa. Namilog ang mga mata ni Karson nang mapagtantong bumubuwelo si Nowi. "What you just said made things easier kasi."

        "Wait," pigil niya sa boyfriend.

        Wala nang nagawa pa si Karson kun'di mapalabi at mapalunok nang tuluyang lumuhod si Nowi sa buhangin. On bended knee, he reached for her hand. "I'm sorry but this one's on you, Miss Chua. You're too lovable naman kasi, e. You listen to me. No, you're doing something for me that's beyond listening. I can't make paliwanag but it feels like you just know me."

        "Nowi. . ."

        "Just hear me out muna, yeah?" Mabagal siyang tumango. There was a tinge of hesitation in his eyes that quickly disappeared upon meeting hers. "I don't know how you'll react kasi. That's why I wasn't sure if I wanted to give it to you agad here today. I don't want you to feel like you have to accept din just because it's my birthday."

        "Babe," bulong ni Karson. She breathed in deeply. "You're rambling. Hinga ka muna, tapos isa-isa lang tayo." She gently caressed his cheek, easing his breathing. "Bakit 'di ka sigurado sa reaction ko?"

        "Because I know this could potentially ruin right now." He smiled sheepishly. "But I also know that this will make you happy. That's always my goal naman. I saw this and I thought – no – I knew right then and there that I would like to see your face light up when I give this to you."

        "So ang pinaka-goal mo is maibigay mo sa 'kin 'yong regalo mo?"

        Karson knew he was ramping up to something the whole day. And of course, she was freaking out.

        They have discussed and thought of the future several times in their few days in La Union. Karson could easily blame the new environment but she would be lying to herself. Sa mahigit tatlong araw kasi nila roon, nakita niya si Nowi. Nakita niya kung paano ito inasikaso at inalalayan si Natnat. Kusa rin itong lumalapit sa mga tatay para sa gawaing-bahay.

        But besides those things, she saw Nowi as a reflection of his family. Malaking tulong na nakilala niya ang mga tatay nito. Lalo niyang naintindihan si Nowi. Seeing how his upbringing was made her realize something.

        Growing up in that household, it was just impossible not to have so much love to give. Sagana sa pagmamahal ang pamilya nito, e.

        Needless to say, visiting La Union enlightened Karson. Lalo ring lumiwanag sa paningin niya si Nowi.

        "You suddenly got quiet." Nanatili ang ngiti ni Nowi. "I wasn't sure so I thought I'd talk to you muna. As expected, you make things easier for me; for us. Do you see how I'm going back and forth? This is on you, ha-ha."

        "Nowi, what are you saying?"

        Lumunok ito bago muling higpitan ang hawak sa kamay niya. "What I'm saying lang naman is I want to make you happy."

        "Kung 'yon naman pala goal mo, bakit mo naman naisip na p'wedeng maapektuhan 'yong 'ngayon'?" With her wrinkled nose, Karson made air quotation marks with her fingers. "Alam mo, ganito na lang. Akin na lang muna 'yong regalo tapos saka tayo mag-decide."

        Nowi laughed softly. Parang bata kasing inilahad ni Karson ang mga kamay.

        "Fine," he said with a soft sigh. Hinawakan at pinagdikit nito ang mga kamay niya. "Close your eyes muna."

        Karson did as she was told. Napasinghap siya nang maramdaman ang pagdampi ng mga labi ni Nowi sa kanya.  She was about to retort when he placed something on her clasped hands.

        "Fuck," bulong ni Karson.

        It felt like a small box – a ring box. Upang makasiguro, nagmulat ng mga mata si Karson. Isang namumulang Nowi ang bumati sa kanya. Nagpasalit-salit ang tingin niya sa boyfriend at sa kahong nakapatong sa mga palad niya.

        Maraming beses na napalabi si Karson. She even bit the inside of her cheek numerous times. Baka kasi panaginip lang o baka nagbibiro lang si Nowi. Sa dami ng beses na nakipagkita siya sa nakilala online, bilang lang sa daliri iyong mga nauwi sa exclusive relationship.

        Before Nowi, she only met a boyfriend's parents once. Hindi na iyon naulit pa. She was convinced that that jinxed the relationship.

        That's right.

        The chances of Nowi proposing after only two months of dating were slim. Hindi naman ganoon kasuwerte si Karson. Isa pa, masyado pang maaga. Hindi naman sila katulad nina Mon at Jai na nine years in the making ang love story.

        But then again, Lilith and Warren met around the same time Karson found her way into Nowi's orbit. And now, Warren and Lilith were in talks of moving in.

        Gaya nga ng sabi sa kanila ni Je, hindi naman nasusukat ang pagmamahal sa tagal ng relasyon. It always depends on the people inside the relationship.

        Nakagat ni Karson ang pang-ibabang labi. "Ring box 'to, 'no?"

        She wanted to dig herself a hole the second she asked that question with a very obvious answer.

        "Mm-hmm." Umayos ng upo si Nowi at muling tumabi sa kanya. "Babe, you're not saying anything. I'm feeling more and more nervous tuloy."

        "Uh. . ." Tumikhim siya. Ilang ulit din siyang nagpeke ng ubo. "Why are you giving me a ring box?"

        "Oh, uh. . . I'm not giving you the box. It's what's inside the box." Nowi opened the tiny box for Karson. Inside was a ring. Isang princess-cut diamond diamond ang nakaupo sa sentro ng silver band niyon. "Look. Before you say anything, uh. . . I just really wanted you to have this."

        "Gusto mo lang ibigay?"

        Nodding, Nowi placed the ring on her finger. "Remember when Jai asked for Warren's help?" She hummed a 'yes'. "I asked Warren for the brochure, then I saw this. I thought about you."

        "Wait, so. . . 'di ka nagpu-propose?" Nagpabalik-balik ang tingin niya kay Nowi at sa singsing na isinuot nito sa kanya. "If you weren't proposing, ano pala 'yong kanina? Lumuhod ka pa." Pinagpagan niya ang mga tuhod nitong may butil-butil pa ng buhangin.

        Pinigilan siya nito. "Did you want me to ba?" he asked.

        "Gusto mo bang isipin ko na magpu-propose ka?" nakatawa niyang tanong. "Kasi kung oo, 'di ko naman ide-deny. I did think you were proposing. Lumuhod ka kasi, 'di ba?"

        Nag-unat ng mga binti si Nowi. Pagkatapos ay humilig ito sa kaliwang balikat ni Karson. "Let's say I did propose. Would you have said 'yes'?"

        Karson glanced at him. Nowi was smiling as he watched the waves. "Ito na naman tayo, e," hindi niya napigilang magkumento. Ikinatawa iyon ni Nowi. They were at it with their mind games again. "I'm not avoiding it, though. Kung gusto mo talagang sagutin ko 'yang tanong mo, warning lang. I'm not sure if you'll like the answer."

        He hummed in agreement. "I know. It's too early pa for us, e. But how long do you think I should wait ba?"

        "Mga five to six years," natatawa niyang sagot.

        Nowi let out a gasp. "Don't you think that's too long na? How about four years maximum?"

        "Okay, deal." Natawa siya nang mahina. Para kasing hindi major life decision ang pinag-uusapan nila. But then again, it has been like that with Nowi so far.

        Major things didn't feel intimidating because of him. Karson didn't feel alone for the first time since her last real relationship. For the first time, she knew someone would hold her hand literally and metaphorically.

        "I can wait for you naman so if you're really sure na with six years maximum, then okay." Nowi yawned. After that, she felt him reach for her hand again. Natawa na naman siya. Nakasiksik na kasi ang boyfriend sa leeg niya pero mukhang hindi pa ito kuntento roon. Pinisil nito ang kamay niya. "According to Lilith, each line in our palms represents something, right?"

        Karson hummed. "Mayro'n daw pang-love, career, saka 'yong pang-overall. Bakit?"

        "This line should be ours."

        "Anong 'ours'?" nakatawa niyang tanong.

        "This one—" Gently, he traced the line etched on the middle of her palm. "—is where ours begins."

        Chuckling, Karson tousled his hair. Ibinaba rin niya ang hood ng suot nitong jacket. "Kung ano-ano na napapansin mo. Antok ka na yata."

        Mapupungay na ang mata ni Nowi. Tanaw na rin kasi nila ang pasikat nang araw. Still, he refused to sleep. He busied himself with scrolling on his phone. Pasimple nitong kinunan ng picture ang mga paa nilang magkatabing nakalubog sa buhangin.

        Nangunot ang noo ni Karson sa sunod na ginawa ng boyfriend. Nowi posted the picture on a different Instagram account. "May dump account ka pala?"

        "Oh, no," he exclaimed before softly chuckling. "It's just my photo dump. It's where I post stuff I don't post in my main account. It's not private naman so you can still search it."

        "Patingin nga ako." She tried reaching for his phone but failed. "Nowi, nakita ko na lahat sa 'yo. If you're the type who secretly post thirst traps, I promise I won't judge you."

        "It's not that kasi." Laughing, he finally gave her the phone. "You can look but please don't tease me about the pictures, yeah?"

        Karson threw Nowi a suspicious glance. Only then did she understand his request when she scrolled through his secret account. Napakarami niyang pictures. Doon pala pino-post ni Nowi ang mga kuha nito sa kanya tuwing lumalabas sila.

        Hindi niya napigilan ang ngiti nang may mapansin. Most of the pictures were dated before that night in Lucban.

        "Naks," panimula niya. "Na-fall ka pala agad sa 'kin, 'no?"

        Nowi pouted. "Give it back na nga. You're teasing me na, e."

        "Ayaw." Inilayo ni Karson ang phone. Pilit naman iyong hinabol ni Nowi. Dahil sa kalikutan, napakubabawan siya ng boyfriend. She felt the sand clinging to her legs but she didn't mind. "Ano pa bang tinatago mo dito?"

        "Nothing na." With his arms on each of her sides, Nowi framed Karson. "What do you want to see pa ba, hmm?"

        "Wala naman. I can't believe I'm saying this but I didn't know."

        "You didn't know what?"

        "'Di ko alam na ganito mo pala ako kamahal," she said, laughing.

        Nowi stared at her with adoration brimming in his eyes. "Do you still have a hard time believing that ba?" Nang-aasar na tumango si Karson. Instead of being annoyed, he leaned closer. Nagdikit ang mga tungki ng ilong nila. "Let me prove it to you, then."

        Despite the uncomfortable grains of sand brushing in between their toes, Nowi peppered her face with tiny pecks. Pumikit si Karson. She scrunched her nose, expecting a few seconds more of butterfly kisses, only to be caught off-guard.

        Nowi had pinched her chin. He, then, carefully brushed his lips against hers. Napasinghap si Karson nang lumalim ang halik na iyon. Tuluyan niyang ikinawit ang mga kamay sa batok ng boyfriend.

        With the hushed sound of the crashing waves kissing the shoreline, Karson felt her worries for the future melt with every kiss.

        "I love you," Nowi murmured sweetly.

        "Alam ko." Maliit na ngumiti si Karson. "Ako rin, e. Mahal din kita."

        As the sun slowly came into view, the full moon faded. Nowi and Karson's last day in La Union has only just begun. Pati ang kuwento nila, nagsisimula pa lang.

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