It makes me wonder sometimes, why I fell for you in the first place. There were so many boys that I could've liked, in and (mostly) outside of school. I know so many, easily likable boys, and what do I do?

I let myself fall for you.

And if you're ever wondering if that's a good thing or not, I honestly don't know, Parker. I've said before that you're funny, you're hot, you're well-liked, and you're smart, in more ways than one. And as much as I like those about you, I still keep asking myself why I even developed feelings for you in the first place.

We come from different worlds - you in a carefree and loose environment, me in a strict and tight one. We come from two different groups - you in the 'cool' group, and me in the 'nerd' group. We act differently, too, in a way.

But what I don't get is, why my feelings were returned. You could've fallen for Jaime, or Jessica, heck, even Ariana. I guess I'm overthinking things.

Maybe I'm just wishing that the brain could make the decisions in matters concerning love. Because, as much as I love knowing that I love you, I hate acknowledging the fact that the ground we stand on isn't on steady grounds; it's on unstable foundation.

Remember the first thing I wrote in this book? That, in a way, I knew you as my home?

You're not a nonliving thing, Parker, nor are you a plant. You're a breathing, rational-thinking human that has the ability to move and think, and has acquired a free will. You can walk, run, jump, swim, whatever movement you feel like doing. You have a talented brain and a strong-fueled heart, and you have a strengthened will. You can do anything you wanted to do if you wished.

And because of this, I'm afraid.

Because, as a quote once said,

"The best and worst home
Is the home that can either walk away or toward you
The best and worst home
Is the home that can either make or break you."

Do you see now why I'm afraid, Parker?

I'm afraid my home could walk away from me.

And maybe I'm overreacting, but I just don't care anymore. I wrote this book for a purpose, to write about the things that constantly run in my mind that concerns you, to tell you things that I could never tell you face to face. I wrote this book for a good, solid reason, to let out steam and to let my emotions run free.

And when I say I'm afraid that my home could walk away from me, I mean it, Parker. You can either walk away or towards me. You can either make or break me.

And honestly, I'm enjoying the ride just as much as I would've enjoyed the destination.

•••

i aim to get a thousand votes for this book, so please help me achieve my goal~!