Ammarah's POV

Little do you know- Alex & Sierra

My lord has been merciful, He has always been merciful and always showcasing the different way of His miracles.

Two days back, Rayyan agreed to treatment. We walked into the room and before the doctor could even talk, Rayyan looked at us and said "I want a treatment"

There was a long moment of silence and then Binta screamed, rushing to his side crying. I didn't know what happened or why he changed his mind, but we are thankful. We are thankful for a chance, we are thankful for his change of mind.

And now a week later, they're planning his movement to Egypt for treatment. They're leaving without me and even when I'm trying hard to be there for him before he leaves, it takes every ounce of energy to not drop school and go with him for the six month duration.

My real parent will be visiting my foster mom today and my real mom have been on edge on meeting "Hanifa" as she puts it. Angry and on edge.

I couldn't sit and talk with my foster mom since Rayyan was admitted which was for the past two weeks. And yesterday when I told her my real parent were to come greet her, she looked stricken with fear. Almost like the ghost she thought she buried was now hunting her.

Yet she smiled and pulled me into a hug then told me she couldn't wait to see them. It wasn't till later in the night did the wind conveyed her whimpers.

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My real mom, Yusrah kept taking deep breaths on our way there. She would furiously look around but when her eyes landed on me, it soften and she calms down.

The car pulled into our compound and I wiped my sweaty hands on my skirt then got down and rang the doorbell. Rahma opened it, looked behind me and opened the door further with her eyes fixed on the family behind me.

I ushered them in, asked them to sit then went ahead to call my foster mom.

I found her on the vanity stool gazing at the mirror and slowly touching her face. When she saw me, she shoved the photo in her hand into the drawer and looked up.

"They're here" I said and she nodded, stood up and strengthened her skirt. She walked out and I started walking behind her for a few steps before quickly going back and checking the room photo she shoved. It was a picture of us standing at the top of a stairs.

"Ammarah? She called out and I hurriedly placed it back then walked out of the room and down the stairs with her.

At the living room, my mom sat impatiently tapping her foot and when she heard our footsteps, she looked up and tucked her lower lips in. As if to stop herself from saying something inappropriate or from screaming.

My foster mom said "Assalamu alaikum" then settled down on the seat opposite my mom's so carefully.

"Welcome Sufyan, Yusrah" She acknowledge and turned to Salim "Salim, right?

Salim nodded stiffly and said nothing. My dad noticing the awkwardness cleared his throat and said "Hanifa, it's been a while"

"Yes" My foster mom answered "How have you been?

My dad nodded "Good. Good. I'm sorry for your loss, Kabeer was such a" My father paused, swallowing tightly then continued "....friend"

My foster mom was about to reply when my mom beat her to it with a half scream

"WHY??

My foster mom's eye turned to her and she said "Why what?

Yusrah shook her head "What have I ever done to you Hanifa? What went down so bad that you had to do this?

"You didn't do anything to me Yusrah"

"Then WHY! Why take my child away from me?

My foster mom quickly shook her head "I've never hurt you intentionally Yusrah" She turned to my dad "Kabeer regretted this every single day"

My mom now was at the point of tears "You have no idea Hanifa, you don't know the pain of sleeping each night worried if your child is alive or dead. Acceptance was hurting us but hope killed us. Your decision cost us our happiness, joy, health, EVERYTHING. How dare you face me like you did nothing, like you just stole my bag and not my child. HOW DARE YOU!

She spatted standing up and storming towards my foster mom. My dad quickly stood up and held her back.

"I'll never forgive you for this Hanifa. You've hurt us badly and we'll never forgive you" my mom cried sitting back.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" My foster mom kept saying rocking herself back and forth as she cried softly. I watched her and my own heart broke as a tear slip. My twin saw this and reached over to squeeze my hands.

"Mom please" I started turning to my mom "They might have taken me but they have also given me a comfortable life. Maybe not in the best way but I have not been maltreated. We all have our low moments"

My mom scoffed "Calling that a low moment"

My foster mom wiped her face and sat up right "I'm sorry Yusrah. That was a desperate moment for us and all we could think about was...us. It was selfish but at that time, it was the only thought we had and after that it's too late. Right before he died Kabeer knew how we tried to ignore Ammarah so our problem doesn't exist to us only made the problem bigger. He then wrote a letter to her. We absolutely love Ammarah, maybe we didn't express it in the right way but we did"

There was silence in the living room then my foster mom turned to my dad "We are deeply and absolutely sorry for taking Ammarah away from you and not loving her the way she deserves but we are not sorry for all the years we have with her. We had a purpose, someone to work for, someone to claim and try looking out for"

My dad heaved a sigh and ran his hands down his face "I understand"

My mom turned to him sharply and he mirrored her gaze "We all made a decision during our desperate moments without thinking of others"

My mom looked into his eyes for seconds and an understanding passed between them then her shoulders relaxed and she gulped tightly.

The next minutes were pin drop silence yet again then my mom pointed to the tray the maid kept on the centre table "Is that Cannolis?

My foster mom looked shocked but quickly recovered and wipe her tears then nodded "Yes it is. I remember you love eating it in school back in Paris"

My mom offered a tight smile and grabbed one then we all picked and bite into it.

And that's how cannolis were eaten, burdens were lifted and hearts were lightened.

Because a desperate act is an act that affects everyone. And when humans recognises a situation they have found or can find themselves in, understanding slips in and forgiveness becomes easier.

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"So they're leaving to Egypt? Aisha asked immediately we walked out of the class

"Yes. In two days time" I replied

"And your real parent are funding?

I shook my head "Rayyan is"

She nodded "Right. Millionaire"

I rolled my eyes and sighed looking at the birds that flocks "The past week have been exhausting"

"You're doing your absolute best Ammarah. Don't overwork yourself"

"Everything is out of place. Rayyan is ill, my real parent are here, my foster mom is hurting because she thinks I'll leave her, my real mom isn't angry but she hasn't forgotten the betrayal, I am a twin, school is stressful, Rayyan is flying out and leaving me"

Aisha placed a hand on my shoulder "Insha Allah it will be fine"

I turned to her and nodded "Insha Allah"

More birds flocked pass us and a smile appeared on my face. Things might be overwhelming, but for the first time I felt them going in the same direction. For the first time I don't feel pulled by different versions of the life I'm living. For the first time, I'm flocking with everyone.