Lulla's Pov:

When I get closer to the tower I adjust my hood once again, making sure that my face is not visible. I can not have people knowing that this is where I am, both for my own safety and everyone else's. I don't want to cause any more trouble than I already have.

Walking into the completely empty lobby as it is about 4 AM, I quickly make my way to the elevator and take it up to the living quarters level. The whole time I am praying that everyone is asleep and I can quickly get back to my room undetected. Eventually, when the doors finally open, I peek out of the elevator first. When I don't see anyone, I carefully creep out into the living area. Walking with silent steps that I had perfected while living in Santina's orphanage, I slide towards the hallway, about to release a sigh of relief at my seemingly successful excursion.

"Lulla, wait."

My sigh of relief gets caught in my throat and I instantly freeze. My body tensing and not moving a muscle, stiffly straight and not daring to turn around.

"We need to talk."

When I still don't move, Loki speaks again. "Lulla, please come sit down."

Without saying anything, I hesitantly turn around, slowly making my way toward the chair across from him, keeping my head down the entire time. When I sit down, there is silence for a moment until I try to explain myself. "I'm sorry... I just had to go-"

"No, it is my turn to speak, and you will listen," he speaks firmly.

I clamp my lips shut and sheepishly nod as I keep my eyes trained on my hands fidgeting in my lap.

"Do you know how scared I was when I saw that you were not in your room?" He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "I told you not to go. I told you not to go because it is not safe. I am trying to keep you safe! And you ignored that. You just had to go, didn't you?!"

I clench my fists and for a moment I lose my cool. "Yes, I did have to! I had to make sure that they were alright! I am supposed to be taking care of them! I failed them once, I can't do that again! You don't understand that! I just needed to be sure that they are ok! Because I did that to them!" I take a breath, my eyes are angry as they look at Loki.

Father's eyes go blank and his face drops ever so slightly. He only speaks again after a moment of heavy silence. "I do understand that, Lulla. I do understand what it is like to fail someone. I understand what it is like to need to protect someone, to make sure that they are ok. That is exactly what I was trying to do. I promised to protect you Lulla, but you are making that very hard to do."

I freeze and he continues. "You have no regard for yourself, Lulla. I know that you care for them and want to make sure that they are alright, but it is not your job to take care of them! You can't hurt yourself in the process. Sometimes you need to put yourself first and do what is best for you. Do what is safest for you. I need you to do what is safest for you."

I stare at him for a while. Eventually, I speak so quietly that I can barely hear myself. "I can't do that." I then stand up and begin to walk away.

Loki stands up after me. "Lulla! Just wait-"

However, he is cut off when Tony walks into the room, entering from just a few feet in front of me, causing me to stop in my tracks. He is looking at his phone when he walks in but looks up for a moment to see me before looking back down at his phone.

"Ah, good to see that you are back from your little excursion Finnley."

I tense. "How did-"

"Did you also have a good time threatening someone with a knife? Is that a hobby you find yourself picking up often?" Tony says emotionlessly.

"You did what?!" Loki shouts from behind me.

I wince slightly at the raised voices but speak quickly. "What? I didn't-"

"Are you sure you want to finish that sentence?" Tony says coldly as he holds up his phone in front of me as it plays a short video of my confrontation with the mugger from just a little while ago after I disarmed his knife from him.

My eyes go wide. I swear that I didn't see anyone else around there, and of course, the only footage that they did get didn't involve how I saved that lady. "I swear I didn't. He was mugging a lady and I stopped him. I just..." my voice trails off.

"Finnley, I honestly do not care what you did or why. But do you understand how bad this looks?!"

"I- I can explain, I am sure it will be fine..."

"Yeah, well Santina's lawyers already got a hold of this. They are spreading it like a wildfire and it is not looking good for you. Oh yeah, by the way, did you know that Santina is alive?! Yeah! She is in the hospital but is alive and well and she has some nasty layers." Tony's tone is furious and cold. It causes a shiver down my spine.

He scoffs. "Speaking of lawyers! The team of lawyers I hired just dropped the case! All thanks to this little video! They claimed it would be career suicide to represent you! Congrats Finnley! You just can't help but screw everything up, can you?!"

I freeze and all the emotions I do so well always hide, well up inside of me. Suddenly, everything starts to seem all too familiar. My surroundings seem to resemble the orphanage and the shrill voices seem to make me pathetically tremble in the same way Ms. Santina does. I want to run. I need to get out of here. I rush off past Tony and down the hallway, not breaking my stride before I get to my room. As I am fumbling down the hallway I am able to hear the muffled sounds of Loki shouting at Tony through my spinning mind. When I get to my door, I am barely able to see past the tears that are welling up in my eyes to be able to reach out and open the door. When I step in I hastily close it behind me. I rush over to the far corner of the room and curl into it, pressing myself up against the wall, seeking any comfort I can get.

I know it was wrong. I screwed everything up. I am still hurting people, even when I try to help.

It is all your fault.

I can't do anything right. Even when I try to, I just make it worse.

You just bring pain to those around you. You are just a burden.

I hold myself tighter, trying to still the shaking in my body. I try to swallow down the tears but everything just comes back stronger. I don't know how long it is that I am sitting there cowering and pressed into the corner, but I am eventually broken away from the degrading thoughts in my own head by a soft knock on the door. I jerk my head up when I hear a hesitant voice.

"Finnley? Are you alright?" I recognize Mr. Barnes' voice speaks quietly from the other side of the door.

When I am silent besides my sniffling, he speaks again. "Is it ok if I come in?"

After a moment, I am about to speak up, telling him to go away, but before I can he speaks again with resolve. "I am coming in."

When he opens the door and steps in he scans the room, seeming to be trying to find me until his eyes eventually land on where I am curled into the corner. His eyes soften slightly and he softly closes the door behind him before slowly walking closer. When he gets closer I frantically try to push myself further into the corner, my mind still panicked and on high alert. Mr. Barnes instantly stills and slowly sits down on the floor in the same spot, a few yards away. He moves so that he is leaning against the wall but does not come any closer. He looks down at his hands for a bit, silence engulfing the room as I stare at him with wide panicked eyes, still weary.

Soon, he speaks, softly and warmly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I- I don't know," I say quietly as my voice still hitches as I am trying to collect my breath and speak through my persistent tears.

He nods. "That is ok. I am here if you want to. Otherwise, we can just sit here."

I nod as well, and for a while, we just sit there. We sit in silence as I collect my breath, having company as I do. When I can breathe mostly steady, I speak, still avoiding looking at him. "I- I keep messing everything up. I try to do something good and I just make everything worse. I have my entire life, I just ruin everything." I take a deep shaky breath. "And I don't know if I can fix it this time."

"From what I have seen, you have good intentions, Finnley. You don't always make things worse, sometimes bad things just happen, and that is not your fault." He pauses and takes a breath. "I don't know what happened, but is there anything you can do to fix it now?"

"I don't think anything can fix this. I messed up badly this time... in several ways." My voice shakes as I speak.

"Then is there anything you can do to make it just a little better?"

"I don't know... Peter would probably know what to do..." I chuckle slightly. "He always seems to know how to fix stuff."

Mr. Barnes smiles very slightly. "Then why don't you call him and see what he has to say."

I hesitate but eventually nod and slowly take out my phone. When I do, Mr. Barnes speaks up again. "Do you want me to leave or stay here?"

I pause for a moment but ultimately decide that I surprisingly like the comfort that he provides by being here. "Can... can you stay?"

He smiles. "Of course."

When I find Peter's contact, I pause, uncertain. I look up at Mr. Barnes with hesitant eyes and he nods encouragingly. I then call Peter and hold the phone up to my ear. After several rings, he answers.

"Finnley? I'm in school. Why are you calling? Is something wrong?" His questions come out at rapid fire.

"O-oh I'm sorry, I forgot. Uhh, I can let you go, sorry for interrupting you-"

"No, Finn, it's fine. What do you need?"

"Umm... I kind of have a problem..."

"What's wrong? I can swing over to you and get there as fast as possible-"

I quickly cover the speaker with my hand and cut him off as look over at Mr. Barnes, making sure he didn't catch that slight slip-up. I refuse to be the one to expose Peter's identity.

"No! I mean, uhh, you are just good at solving problems, and I... I don't want to fuck anything up even more."

"What happened?"

I take a deep breath. "The lawyers dropped the case. There is a video that got out, and it looks bad for me. I don't know what to do." 

"Oh. Yeah, that does not sound good." I hear him sigh on the other side of the phone.

"I screw everything up. I just can't do anything right and I am tired of it. I don't know what to do, Peter." My voice is desperate and broken.

There is a pause before Peter speaks again, and when he does he speaks hurriedly and determined. "We will fix this, Finnley. I will fix this."

"What? No, Peter, you don't have to-"

"I'm going to fix this." He rushes his words out and then abruptly hangs up, leaving me slightly stunned.

I slowly drop my hand, bringing the phone away from my ear, and look toward Mr. Barnes, slightly shocked. "He just hung up on me."

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A/n - More wholesome Bucky content because I desperately need more of this side of him in a way that is probably concerning.